Since Jellicos gave me a fantastic update I figured I'd start making things better. Thanks to everyone for the feedback, it's much appreciated.

Part Eight

I managed to get to the car after leaving Sara's and I've been sitting here since, trying to comprehend what's just happened, and why I care so much, it's only been a few days.

I'm not even sure how long I've been sitting here. Looking at my watch I notice almost an hour has passed. I contemplate going back up to Sara's for a second, trying again to get her to listen to me. But then I remember just how angry she was, how helpless I felt, how she made it perfectly clear she wasn't interested in anything I had to say any more.

So I start the car and head home, crawling into bed as soon as I get there, not that I think I'll be able to sleep. My mind is buzzing with her words, I hate myself for hurting her like this, and for making her think I didn't mean any of it. I fall into a fitful sleep really hoping that when I wake, this will all have been a dream.

- - - - - - - -

I arrive at work late; I spent all afternoon with Lindsey and really didn't want to leave her for the reality of work tonight.

I pass Greg's lab and watch him turn away from me, I'm not mad at him; he had no idea what he was doing. I shouldn't have shouted at him, but at the time I couldn't help it. I should probably tell him that, apologize to him. Maybe I will later.

I'm dreading seeing Sara, I have no idea how she's going to react. As I walk towards the break room I see everyone is waiting on me. I guess I won't have to wait long to find out.

As I enter the Break room the guys offer their hello's, Sara is the only one I'm looking at though and she doesn't even look at me. Doesn't even acknowledge me. That hurt.

"Catherine, Sara is all yours again tonight, how's the case coming?"

"Yeah, it's going okay." I say distractedly. I had forgotten I was working with Sara. Still, maybe I can get her to talk to me.

"Good, keep at it."

"I'll get started." Sara tells him as she exits the break room.

Grissom continues talking but I have no idea what about, pretty soon he's leaving.

"Hey Cat, how you holding up?" I look up into Warrick's worried face, not actually sure how to answer I not sure how I'm holding up.

"I don't know Rick, ask me later, when I feel something other than empty inside."

"That bad?" I take it the talk didn't go well?"

"That would be an understatement, it was disastrous. She was so angry."

"Give it some time."

I simply nod in agreement, knowing full well that this is Sara we're talking about, a miracle wouldn't be a lot more useful than time.

"I gotta go, you know my number if you need me."

"Thanks." And once again I'm left alone with my thoughts.

I stand and make my way towards the lab Sara and I are working in; my legs are a little shaky by the time I get there, the nerves back in full force.

"Hi." I offer as I enter the lab, again she doesn't even acknowledge my presence.

I start working in the uncomfortable silence that's surrounding me; I truly wish I could turn back time.

"So how are you?" Seriously lame Cath, that's the best you got? Don't give up your day job babe.

"Don't bother." I know exactly what she means but I press the issue nonetheless.

"Don't bother what?"

"Don't bother talking to me. Don't bother trying to get me to talk to you. Don't bother thinking you're going to be able to sort this out. But most of all don't bother thinking we are ever going to be friends again."

"I just..."

"You're stupider than you look, I said don't bother, I'm not even remotely interested in anything you have to say, understand? We have a case to work I know that, I don't like it, but I'll deal, the quicker I work, the quicker that situation changes. So just shut the fuck up and leave me alone."

I look at her for a second before walking out of the lab towards my office; I need to clear my head. Nothing could have prepared me for the wall of pure anger she's put up. I feel the self-hatred build again at the thought that I caused her the pain behind it.

The funny thing is if she'd have spoken to me like that a month ago I'd of had her ass fired. In fact I can't remember the last time I let somebody talk to me like that but I can't be angry with her for it; not when I'm the reason behind the pain causing this anger.

It takes me a good half an hour to get back to work. Choosing to follow her wishes and just work. It's hard, but I don't think I could deal with any more venom from her right now.

- - - - - - - -

Work carries on in much the same fashion for the next two weeks.

Sara ignores me, I make feeble attempts at talking to her, she either ignores me or gets angry with me. It's made even worse by the fact she still distracts me, even with the contempt for me pouring out of her I still can't keep my eyes of her.

Everyone has noticed, even Grissom. I still haven't apologized to Greg; I don't even go the lab if I can help it, sending whoever I'm working with to get results.

It's getting to the point where I dread work, a job I love, a job I worked my ass off for.

I'd even settle for the strained, animosity filled relationship we had before, anything but this.

I find myself sitting in the locker room after shift staring blankly at the lockers in front of me wondering when in the hell I became the type of person who moped like this? Since you fell for Sara my mind replies. Fell for her? What the...? Why else would it hurt this much?

Well fan-freakin-tastic great time to make that realisation Cath, really though, way to go falling for a woman who hates your guts.

"Hey Cat, you okay?" I jump a little at the unexpected sound of Warrick's voice.

"Oh, hey, didn't hear you come in."

He sits down next to me and regards me for a second.

"Ice queen still freezing you out?"

"Oh yeah."

"You had a lucky escape there though right?"

"What?" I practically shout at him.

"Well you could have ended up actually in a relationship with her, good thing you didn't, since you clearly don't want to be."

What is he talking about, I've been mopping around like a fool for two weeks because I don't want to be with her?

"What are you talking about? Of course I want to be with her."

"Oh sorry, I just assumed the way you we're moping around but not actually doing anything about it that you didn't want to." I sit here as his words sink in, he's right; I haven't done anything but mope.

"And I for one am glad you're not with her."

"Why would you say that?"

"Well come on, look at how you're behaving, I've never seen you give up so easily."

"I haven't given up I just don't know what to do."

"Oh yeah, because that's a situation you've never been in before isn't it. I've seen you wing your way out of a bind a million and one times."

Again he's right I've never let that stop me before.

"Like I said, I'm glad you're not with her, you've been acting totally different to your usual self for weeks now. And all after being with her for a day or two, think how different you'd be had it been long term."

"I'm really acting that different?"

"Oh hell yeah, since when do you mope?" He's right, I don't. "Since when do you let people treat you like she's been doing lately?" Right again, it doesn't happen. "And most importantly, since when do you give up on the things you really want? For Christ's sake Catherine you're the most determined person I know, don't you think you should start acting like it?"

His words sink in and I feel the anger slowly start to build, he is right, how could I not be doing anything and everything to make this right, god knows I want her badly enough. And on top of that who the hell does she think she is talking to me like that? Treating me like she has been, before even hearing my side of the story.

"You're right." I stand up and practically stomp to my locker, grabbing my jacket. "I can't believe I've put up with this for so long, she is so going to listen to me."

"You want to be with her right?"

"Yes." Of that I have no doubt.

"You sure? The giving up seemed to be working so well for you." He smiles.

"Not a chance in hell." I say heading towards the door. "I gotta go, got someone I need to talk to."

I walk out then pop my head back around the door. "Warrick."

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for the kick up the ass."

"Anytime, now go get her."

I turn to leave, heading straight for my car. She's going to listen to me, even if I have to shout it through her door.

Thanks for reading.

I'd love some feedback.

Sam