Sialeeds often spent her days sleeping away the hangovers from the nights she drank away. She was never to be queen, never to inherit the throne, never to marry or have children. She had no responsibilities other than to look after her niece and nephew on occasion. And even so, there was a hundred other people who could look after them. It wasn't as if the palace was short on staff or Queen's knights. The only real duty she had was to accompany the young prince on visits to various towns in the Queendom, guiding him with her political savvy, which wasn't even a real effort at all since it came to her naturally.
So when it was finally time for her to make a decision, one in which rested the fate of the entire Queendom and the fate of her sister's children, she found herself terribly conflicted. Could she bear responsibility for the outcome? Would she be able to accept the consequences? She knew that it would not be acceptable to their newfound allies and it would be downright hurtful to her niece and nephew. But although she lived with few responsibilities and few regrets, she did understand that, as Zahak once told her beloved nephew, that the best course of action is not always the ideal one. Sometimes, you have to do something you don't want to do.
It was the first night in a long time that she could not sleep and she could not drink. Thinking about what she had to do would keep her awake and sober for a very long time and probably even after everything had been accomplished. Sialeeds stared up at the starlit sky, a look of desperation that she would not normally let anyone see on her face.
"Arshtat." She whispered to the sky. "I know you still remember that pact we made long ago. Haswar and I agreed wholeheartedly to go along with it and we had no objections. We accepted that there would be sacrifices we would have to make because we were willing to do anything to keep peace in this country and peace between ourselves. We agreed because we loved you, each other and this nation. We were willing to set aside our own happiness in order to ensure happiness for all." Sialeeds gently flipped her hair out of her face only for it to fall back in place.
"And now it has come to this. I hope you'll forgive me for what I am about to do. I love your children as much as you do and the last thing I want to do is to hurt them. It hurts me just to think about it. But damn it, sister, we learned the lesson when we were young, that we are often obligated to do difficult and unpleasant things. When a person is ill, they take bitter medicine in order to get better. Our land is ill and a spoon full of bitter medicine is what is needed. The country has become filthy with scum like Barows and Godwin. And I've come to realize that if Falena is to ever be at peace again, the trash needs to be taken care of." She placed a hand on her hip and chuckled. "It's a dirty job, but someone has to do it. And it might as well be me." Sialeeds walked over to the edge of the walkway and looked out over the lake, watching the reflection of a shooting star in the water. "I miss you, Arshtat. I have a feeling that it won't be long before I see you again. But until then, I intend to live up to my part of our pact."
Sialeeds gave one last look at the night sky before turning around back to the castle.