Okay so there's no point me saying that much about this chapter because it is basically Tommy reading his letter. I know that some of the stuff I say is similar to what was in Sadie's letter but I guess that she wants to tell Tommy everything she's feeling and she did the same to Sadie so the principal is the same right? And whoa I didn't know everyone wanted to read it so I really hope you aren't disappointed cuz you probably will be and for that I'm sorry!

Disclaimer: Yeah, still don't own anything…..YET!

Oh yeah and one more thing….ENGLAND RULES. Even though I don't live in London and I don't like it there that much…

Chapter 7 – So You Want To Know The Story?

She was going to stay in London, she couldn't believe that she'd actually acted upon this impulse and that she was actually running away, she was actually doing it, she was being independent and in a way she liked it. Again like the whole sleeping rough thing really wasn't that great but she was going to have to put up with it. Plus she'd found these really great guys, runaways just like her and they were musicians with nothing really but the gig that was performing on the street corners and salvaging whatever money they could. They were good, she had to admit. She showed them her stuff and obviously they were impressed I mean she's Jude Harrison, the girl's got a voice, and soon they were performing together and some days they even managed to gather a crowd of people dancing to their stuff. The guitarist was kinda hot she thought, and his accent was really sweet too.

An hour he's been sat there staring blankly at the words on the page, he just couldn't bring himself to read them, but he knew he had to, so he forced his eyes down to look at the page and it was a good few minutes before he looked up again.

I really doubted you'd ever get this letter. I doubted that any of us would ever see you again. I mean that's what you said isn't it? That you didn't think you'd be coming back? Well now that I'm gone even if you did come back you haven't come back to me. I'm guessing Sadie told you that I'm gone? Stupid question I know. At least I'm giving you an explanation because I feel you deserve it, I obviously didn't.

I just couldn't take it any more, it's just so hard and I'm obviously too easy to give up and I believe that now. On my sixteenth you told me I was asking the wrong guy. I believed in you and you told me I could trust you. You broke your promises and that's something I don't ever want to forgive you for. So am I asking the wrong guy now? Shay, Jamie, Spied, Kat, Dad and Mom, now even you leave me. Everyone does and I wish I knew why. I wish I knew why everyone finds it so easy to hurt me.

I thought getting this recording contract was the best thing that ever happened to me. I got everything I ever wanted with the prospects of fame and I loved it. But most of all, I got to be close to you. I know first of all I hated you but you know how quickly that changed. I knew that being with G-Major would turn my life around but I didn't expect there to be so much bad. There's way more bad than good, but I always had you.

She was cold. But he realized that every word she had written he deserved. For lying to her, cheating her and leaving her when things were going so well. Sadie was right, he had owed her an explanation and then maybe one day he could see her understanding his predicament. He knew the rest of the letter was more about him but he forced himself to carry on reading. He owed it to her.

And now I don't Tommy and I'm lost. I mean I knew as soon as we started that any kind of a relationship we were going to have, even just being friends was going to be difficult, but there was something about you that stopped me giving up on you no matter how much I wanted to. When I heard you talking to Kwest on my sixteenth I was so happy and I knew that there was something there between us and that there always had been. When you started dating Sadie I was devastated but if you couldn't be happy with me then I just wanted the two people I cared for most to be happy and I was genuinely pleased and I didn't want to believe you cheated because I wanted you and Sadie to be happy. Then you rekindled that trust on my seventeenth birthday and I started believing in you again. When I told you about 'White Lines' I as good as admitted my feelings to you because I couldn't hold it in any longer. The kiss after meant so much to me. It made me think that maybe you loved me the way I love you. I don't think I'll ever stop loving you because you really were the only one. I had to get away and I'm sorry but at least you'll know why I'm gone.

Always,

Jude xxx

So she had loved him. He should have told her, he should have explained to her everything and maybe if he had then he could be with her right now and he could be with her in every way he wanted to be and that she wanted to be. There was a soft knock on the door and he let Emi wander into the guestroom. She knew her Daddy was upset and without saying a word she let him lift her into his soft embrace and they held each other, she was comforting him for reasons she didn't know and they both fell asleep together. Tomorrow they would start searching Toronto. Just maybe she would have stayed close.

A month had passed and Jude was loving life in England. Of course there were times, when she wasn't having fun with the band that she had to sit alone and think. Most of these times she cried, because she still missed them. She wanted to go back sometimes and she seriously thought about it. The guys were a whole lot of fun to be around but they reminded her of SME, but with English accents. I mean they were all so close and they goofed around. Michael and James were so much like Wally and Kyle that sometimes it hurt Jude to look at them, or to goof around with them.

Then there was Rob, how could she not like Rob? He was totally hot. He had black shaggy hair and piercing green eyes that stared right through Jude whenever he looked at her. It helped that she knew he was totally into her. He had as good as told her that. She had turned him down, because she was still thinking of Tommy. It was time for her to move on, he probably didn't even know she was missing and he didn't care for her like that. The only other thing she had to get past was the no relationships in the band and she knew that Michael and James wouldn't be too happy. She dropped her thoughts of Tommy, she was in England she could afford to have fun with a guy she liked.

'Hey Rob.' She smiled walking up to him, she was so sure of what she was about to do. It was his 20th birthday so it was the perfect time to make turning him down back up to him.

'Oh, hey Mackenzie.' He replied coldly and she frowned.

She said. 'I have a present for you.'

He sighed. 'K, I thought we agreed we don't have the money to…'

He was cut off when she reached her arms around his neck and kissed him softly.

'NowthatIdon'tmind' he managed to rush out before closing the gap between their lips once more.

He walked her back and pressed her into the wall never breaking their kiss. So he was three years older than her, Tommy was seven. Damn him! He had to keep invading her thoughts and now she was kissing a guy she really liked and all she could think about was how this guy wasn't Tommy, he couldn't make her feel good like Tommy could. The kiss from Rob was kind of urgent, nothing soft and gentle or loving. He knew that she wouldn't let him do anything to her, she wasn't that kind of girl, she kept herself to herself and he had to respect that if he wanted to be with her, so he contented himself with just kissing her for now.

Their search of Toronto was proving fatal, they'd hardly had a lead in six months. There was nothing in Canada that they could find, at least nothing close to home. There was no credit history out of Toronto since she had disappeared and she had a missing person's report filed with the police. There had been one sighting in California but it said that the person claimed to have talked to Jude, he knew that if this was true, and he could tell from the blurry picture he'd got of her that it was, Jude would be long gone to avoid being found.

For the past few months he had been working with the new Instant star Karma. She'd shown some romantic interest in Tommy but he wasn't interested, it reminded him far too much of how he had met Jude and plus. He really wasn't interested.

Jude would be eighteen next month.

Okay there you have it guys, hope you weren't too disappointed. I have the next chapter written so I just have to type it out and stuff. Please read and review.

Luv Sofi xxx