Juliet shifted next to him on the wooden pier, swinging her feet in the water and creating a small splash that hit his legs. Clyde smiled at her, rolling his eyes.
"I'm trying not to get wet today Juliet," Clyde said. "I would appreciate it if you didn't make that impossible."
Juliet beamed and kicked her legs harder.
"You're the one who suggested we go to the lake Cly," Juliet said. For dramatic effect, she slammed her feet down into the water, creating a loud splash. Clyde tsked under his breath and reached down, rolling up his pants from where they were on his shins higher up onto his knees. If Juliet wished to make it impossible for his legs to be dry, he at least wanted to keep his pants dry.
Clyde had been the one to suggest they visit the lake. His first thought had been to try and go with Juliet to the capital city, but her home was here in Old Corona and it was him that was leaving. He didn't need to uproot her life for one day for a goodbye.
They returned to silence, just staring out as the sun dipped below the trees of the forest. Old Corona's forest was beautiful, something Clyde often had to silently concede to himself. He loved Corona, it was Iridia's sister kingdom after all, but it always paled in comparison to his homeland. Iridia's mountains and cool wind always had a soft beauty he felt couldn't topped, but the forests and lakes of Corona did have their own charm to it.
Clyde shut his eyes and listened to the crickets sing. To him, it was just the sound of chirps and a humming sound. Clyde was sure Juliet was detecting some kind of conversation or maybe even an actual song of some kind. Clyde didn't ask though, just let the sound and sunlight pass.
"I wish I could stop time," Clyde said softly, suddenly, mostly to himself, "Just let everything freeze the way it is, right now."
Juliet scoffed and took his hand, squeezing it softly. A few years ago, Clint would have blushed at the action, looked for some kind of tell in her eyes that it was more than a friendly gesture. Those days were gone. That was for the younger days, when they were fifteen and he hadn't yet understood what being in love really meant.
Clyde turned to her, and Clyde felt some of the wisps of her hair tickle his nose as it blew from the wind. Her ponytail days were long behind her, now she kept her brunette curls loose, flowing to her mid-back. He liked it like this, he was glad she changed it.
"Freeze time, right now?" Juliet asked, half-smiling. "Right as we're about to get the things we want? You're finally going home."
The things they wanted. Clyde was finally going home to Iridia, if only for a little while. Roman needed to make sure everything was alright here in Corona. Even if they were their closest ally and their family, in the game of politics, you could never be too sure. Best to tell Roman directly.
At least, that's why he said he was going. Not because—
"And I'm getting married," Juliet continued easily. Clyde did flinch a little at that, because though he had long since gotten over the fact that Juliet would never be his, it still didn't mean he was still wasn't bothered a little by her talking about her love for someone else. Clyde just hoped Juliet didn't notice, because it wasn't her responsibility to love him. To make him feel better because she was in love with someone else.
Juliet pursed her lips and squeezed his hand again. She seemed to be tittering at the edge of something, like she wanted to say something but couldn't bring herself. She often got that look around him, and Clyde didn't know why. It was one of the unmentionable things. The unmentionable things were the words they knew to leave unsaid, even they weren't sure that the words would be.
"It's like a secret," Juliet had whispered one day in his ear, "just neither of us now it."
The unmentionable things, as the name implied, was never mentioned. They didn't know, and Clyde didn't care to. Juliet had the right to say what she wanted. But today, today however seemed different. Like she might fling herself off the edge, and actually tell him one today on this pier.
She sighed deeply and looked up at him, smile turning sad.
"Xavier once told me something," Juliet said. "He told me that you fall in love with two people at once, always go to the second person you feel for. Because if you loved the first, you wouldn't love the second at all."
Clyde furrowed his brow. He had many reasons why that argument was invalid. But..but something in him pulled him back from saying. Something in her stopped him. Maybe it was the way she spoke, the look in her eyes, maybe the way the sun shone on her in the dusk. He wasn't sure.
"Xavier told me this soon after he met Varian," Juliet continued.
"Why?" Clyde managed to squeak out.
"Because Varian was the second person I fell in love with." Juliet said this simply, like it wasn't something that was Earth-shattering. Juliet was Varian's first love, it was a well-known story. The Treasonous Alchemist and The Framed Island Girl, who fell in love on the run from the guards and became good through the power of love. It was quite a popular story here in Corona.
"Wh-who was the first?" Clyde said. He knew it was though, and he tried not to let that make his heart triple it's speed. The only other boy she knew her age before Varian was —
"You," she said. Try as he might, Clyde couldn't bring himself to say or do anything. He didn't have it in him to react. And even if he did, he wasn't sure how to react.
How was he supposed to reconcile that? That the woman he was in love with had once upon a time loved him back? He was a prince and a diplomat, he knew what to say and when. It was his job, to know what sweet or sour words would fix a mess. But for once, he was coming up empty.
"Do you..do you still?" Clyde finally asked, searching her face for any clues before he asked.
Juliet shook her head. "No. I-I-I don't. I haven't been in love with you for a very long time."
Clyde let go of her hand and stared at her blankly.
"Why are you now telling me this?" Clyde demanded. He didn't want to annoyed or angry with her. But he felt like he had a right to be . How dare she? Give him hope that maybe, just maybe she was in love with him too? He had given that hope long ago, only for her to rebuild it and destroy it again in seconds.
Juliet had the decency to look shameful.
"Because I know," Juliet said. "I-I know you're in love with me Clyde."
"How long have you known?" Clyde asked. If he hadn't of been so upset he might have been surprised. Juliet did crack another, small smile, before it disappeared again.
"Since we were sixteen," Juliet said.
"And you didn't feel the need to tell me?" Clyde said. "You didn't feel like telling me 'hey, Clyde, I am not in love with you, so, uh, move on'."
She frowned too, cheeks turning as red as her dress.
"I was in love with and dating another boy," Juliet said. "Was that not enough indication for you?"
Clyde didn't answer. That had been more than enough. They both knew that. He had been able to read the signs he was never going to be with her for years.
"I-I still had the right to know," Clyde said. "To know-know that you knew how I felt. To know that you were in love with me once."
Juliet reached for his hand again, and he didn't flinch away. He didn't grasp it back either.
"You're right, I should have told you. That was on me," Juliet admitted. "But I'm telling you now because I wanted to let you kno-know, I-I understand."
Clyde didn't bother asking what she understood. He knew exactly what she understood. Why he had chosen the week of her wedding to flee back to Iridia. That he loved her and was happy for her but for just once in his life he was going to be selfish. Because he understood she didn't love him like he loved her. And he was fine with that.
It was just that one, deep, hidden, jealous part of him that he hated that made it impossible to watch her get married. He could accept she was getting married. He just couldn't watch it happen.
"I understand. You need to find yourself, find a life and a home and love away from me," Juliet said. "It's been selfish of me to just carry on like I didn't know. I-I used you, Clyde, and I-I'm sorry."
And now she was crying. Clyde sighed and reached to wipe away her tears.
"I could have left at any time," Clyde said. "I've known for years I didn't have a chance. I could have told you or left or... This isn't black and white. We both have blame to share in this."
He kissed the top of her forehead like he had done a thousand times. His breath wavered as he pulled away, smiling at her wearily.
"We're both selfish and terrible," Juliet whispered. Clyde chuckled under his breath.
"Yeah, we are," Clyde conceded. "Maybe that's why we weren't meant to be. We just don't fit."
Juliet didn't say anything for a long moment. She turned back to the water, the lake now pinkish orange colored from the reflection of the sky.
"How long will you be gone?" Juliet asked.
Clyde didn't turn to the water, just kept watching her.
"I don't know," he said honestly. He had no immediate plans to return to Corona. And he really did some time away from Corona, away from Juliet. That could take months, maybe even years.
"I'll miss you," Juliet said. "We all will."
"I'll miss you too," Clyde said. It was true, he would miss her. He would miss her so damn much, even if he was still angry with her right now.
"I am kind of sad that I won't get to see your wedding dress," Clyde said. "Varian's been going on and on for the past two days about how beautiful you looked in it."
Juliet rolled her eyes, but her smile wasfond.
"He saw it once on accident and suddenly he thinks he has the right to brag on it," Juliet said. "I don't know what I'm going to do with that boy!"
Marry him.
Clyde didn't say that but he wanted to.
"You're the best friend I ever had, Clyde Shawn Mond. I love you."
Just not the way he wanted.
"I love you too, Juliet."
Even if it wasn't the same way.
Eliza was crying, which meant that Shawn was crying too. Juliet jumped immediately towards the youngest of the two children, given that he was closer than Eliza. Juliet was vaguely aware of Varian moving towards Eliza and him whispering something to her as Juliet picked up her just past two-year-old son.
Shawn's face was raspberry and his sobs were unyielding. His tears were loud, that was for sure, even louder than the still sniffling Eliza. Juliet hugged Shawn to her chest, hoping the contact might calm him, and kissed his curly dark hair.
"Shh, Shawn, it's alright," Juliet whispered. Shawn hiccuped between his yells and tearful screeches and Juliet shifted his weight in her arms. She also moved her balance to her right foot, as the floor of the nursery wasn't the kindest on her feet. "Ca-can you tell me what's wrong sweetie?"
Juliet could hear Varian and Eliza talking softly, and she peaked over to where Varian sat next to Eliza's bed, where the sad but no longer crying Eliza was propped up. Juliet was pretty sure she knew what was upsetting Shawn, which was the fact that Eliza was upset, but she felt it was important to ask him anyway.
Shawn quietened a little but didn't stop crying. She bounced him gently in her arms, like from when he was younger and only a baby.
"Little bat, can you please tell me what's wrong?" Juliet said. Shawn hiccuped again and began to quiet down seriously. "I really want to help you, but I can't if you don't talk to me Shawn. So can you do that for me? Can you tell me what's wrong, so Mommy can help you? Because Mommy really does want to help you."
Shawn's cries finally came to just soft whimpering, which while not something Juliet ever wanted to hear, was a good sign in this moment. It was a sign Shawn was calming down, which made it easier to get him to stop crying. Juliet placed another peck to Shawn's temple.
"Are you feeling better?" Juliet asked. Shawn whimpered again and pulled at a loose strand of her hair limply in his little fist. He gave a single nod, which Juliet took as a small but reassuring sign that he was feeling better now.
"Can you tell Mommy why you were crying?" Juliet asked quietly. Shawn bit his lip and looked at the fist still clenching her hair. "Maybe I can help you if you tell me."
Shawn blinked again through his still lingering tears.
"'Liza sad," Shawn said softly. "'Liza sad."
Juliet nodded solemnly. "You're sad because Eliza is sad?"
Shawn nodded gravely. "'Liza no sad. 'Liza no sad!"
Eliza wasn't supposed to be sad, at least not according to Shawn. He said so often. Eliza was his big sister, she was always supposed to be happy. So whenever Eliza got upset over something, that meant Shawn was soon to follow with his own set of tears and runny nose.
Juliet peeked over, where Eliza was smiling a little while Varian stared at her. His voice was still low and quiet, meant for Eliza to hear alone. Whatever he was saying seemed to be calming her, however,
"Eliza's talking to Daddy, see?" Juliet said. "He's helping her, like I'm helping you." Shawn stared his sister and father for a long moment, then turned back to Juliet with a pouty and tired face.
"'Liza no sad?" Shawn said, this time as a question. Juliet smiled weakly and gently ran her hand through his curly dark hair again.
"Eliza is feeling better," Juliet said. She hoped she was right. Shawn still tucked in her arms, Juliet began to walk out of the room.
"How about me and you go play a game, okay?" Juliet said. "Just the two of us. How does that sound?"
Shawn gave an almost too soft to hear excited squeak as they left. Juliet sent a single glance over her shoulder, seeing Varian and Eliza still talking softly and turned away from her. Juliet lingered for just a moment, wondering if she should stay. Then Shawn pulled at her hair again, and she left.
Not to her surprise, Shawn was asleep within an hour. Shawn always tuckered pretty easily after being upset, as any young child did, and before long the raven-haired toddler was asleep and curled up in Juliet's arms.
Juliet just remained in the den for a long while after Shawn fell asleep, leaned back in a soft blue chair while holding tightly to her slumbering son. Juliet kept quiet to herself the whole while, musing about this and that as she rhythmically twirled a strand of Shawn's hair.
Her thoughts drifted as a quiet hour of sleep passed. They came and went freely, going wherever they wanted. At first they were solely on Eliza, panic worried she couldn't really express due to holding Shawn, but over time her worry subsided as she remembered that Varian was with her. Eliza was a Daddy's Girl was through and through, if anyone could calm her down, it would be him.
Her musings turned more abstract as that emotion passed. She thought about Cosette, and how she must be fairing with her plethora of great-grandbunnies, and also about Ruddiger and where he was most likely burrowed in her kitchen eating all the apples her and Varian had. But eventually, her thoughts began to linger on the humans in her life.
Or rather, the one that wasn't anymore.
Clyde.
When left to think for too long, Juliet's mind always fell into her blond best friend. It had been far too long since she had seen him, years, and months since his last letter. She had known Clyde had left for home to get away from her, to learn how to be himself without her, to get over her, but she still missed him dearly.
He was in the place where the lost thing went. That strange place where you couldn't be quite sure where it resided, yet you had an inkling deep in you where it was. Iridia was the place where this lost thing went, where her best friend and closest confident scuttled off to.
She had said she understood, and she had, she did. She still did. But it still felt foreign to her, all these many years later, not to have Clyde with her. To have him be one of her many lost things.
A rusting came from the door to the den, and from the doorway Juliet could see the beady but inquisitive eyes of Ruddiger peaking out at her. Juliet could see the fur around his lips were wet from juice; it seemed she had been correct in her apple assumption.
"Shhh," Juliet warned him, "Shawn's sleeping."
Ruddiger frowned and skittered into the room, coming to rest by her feet.
"I don't have to be quiet," Ruddiger said, "we don't even know he can hear me like you can."
Juliet frowned as Shawn rustled against her chest.
"Be it words or titters Ruddiger," Juliet whispered in a hiss, "he can still hear you. So please be quiet." Ruddiger rolled his eyes and settled at her feet, curling in a ball next to the hem of her dress.
The door opener again, this time revealing the form of Varian. He appeared weary but was smiling all the same. His shoulder was stained with something, most likely Eliza's tears, and her eyebrows raised as he walked over towards her.
"How's Eliza?" Juliet asked. Varian sighed deeply and plopped down into the chair next to her. He smiled at her.
"She's okay now," Varian said. "She was upset because her stuffed giraffe had gone missing."
"Did you two find it?" Juliet said. "Me and you can look, just let me—"
Varian shook his head and pulled a gloved hand on her shoulder.
"Me and her talked it through," Varian said. "She left it at the capital when we visited Rapunzel and Eugene. I told her she can get it when we return."
Juliet's lips thinned. "Where is she now?"
"Doing the same thing Shawn is, only in her bed." Varian tilted his head to the side. "Shouldn't you go put him down."
Juliet shook her head and hugged Shawn tighter to her chest. Shawn yawned and turned on to his other cheek.
"He's fine here," Juliet said. "I don't want to wake him by moving."
Varian snickered and leaned back in the (mis) matched chair. Silence passed for a moment, the only sounds gently breathing shared between the room's four inhabitants.
"She said something that reminded me of you," Varian said after a while. "She said that her giraffe was in the place where lost things go."
Juliet's eyes widened but then she grinned.
"It seems I'm rubbing off on her," Juliet said. Varian smiled once fondly.
"Yeah, I guess you are."
Not much has changed in Old Corona. The houses are still lined up in the rows as he remembered, the sun still beat relentlessly onto the citizens, and flowers still grew along the sides of the country roads. Yet, Clyde could still tell the winds of change had blown through Old Corona.
Where once a toy shop stood was now a cobbler's home, Xavier's old blacksmith was shuttered from when he had moved back to the capital, and there were new citizens, young and old, that he had never seen before. Nothing was too different, it was still the same Old Corona he remembered from nearly a decade ago, but something about it felt new, different, almost exciting. Like he was exploring it all over again.
Clyde kept his crutch tucked under his arm and walked along the dusty dirt road. He waved calmly and smiled at those he passed, but he kept his goal in mind. He was here to see one particular family, and he wasn't sure he could control his nerves and excitement much longer if he stopped.
Eventually the familiar home came into view, but it wasn't quite as familiar as he thought it would be. The front door had been repainted from that nasty banana yellow to a much nicer shade of ruby. There was a hole in the roof that was covered with shingles of a different color. A new apple tree was sprouting in the corner of the yard.
Clyde stopped cold at the gate, watching the events unfolding behind the fence. There were three figures out by the tree at the corner edge of the fence, oblivious so far to Clyde's presence. The three of them seemed to be picking leaves off of the still growing tree, sitting on the grassy ground with smiles as they turned over the leaves in their palms.
One of them was an adult, and the only one recognizable to him. With his dark hair and blue eyes, it could only be one Varian Wry, only ten years older than Clyde last remembered. He still had a pair of goggles firmly placed amidst his unruly hair, still had two front buck teeth from his smile.
Clyde smiled at the sight of his old friend. Even if he had been a little jealous of Varian, Clyde had always considered Varian a friend. He had missed seeing his good if a little eccentric friend in his time in Iridia.
The two others he didn't recognize, but he could guess from the few letters exchanged between this family and him. One was a little girl with twin braids and eyes the same color as Varian, looking down at the leaf in confusion with furrowed brow. This was little Eliza, who just passed her sixth birthday last week if Clyde did his math right.
The final was a little boy with Varian's dark hair and Juliet's chocolate eyes. He seemed more invested in what they were looking at, eyes wide with excitement and wonder.
"These are part of the Rosaceae family of trees," Varian said, voice carrying across the yard. "They're identifiable by their special leaves. They look just like these."
Clyde smiled at Eliza and Shawn's mixed reactions, as Shawn's smile grew but Eliza's brow only furrowed deeper. Clyde shifted his crutch so that it was more comfortable under his arm.
"That's a interesting science lesson, Varian," Clyde called out. Varian whipped his head around immediately, surprised, but then smiled when he caught sight of Clyde at the gate. Eliza seemed much more interested in Clyde, dropping the leaf on the ground and rising to her feet quickly with wide eyes. Her brother seemed less interested, turning his head lazily like a cat, eyes glancing over Clyde once before returning to the leaf in his hands.
"Daddy, who's that?" Eliza said, pointing at Varian as if Varian couldn't see him. Varian laughed and stood, leading an excited Eliza and a rather reluctant Shawn towards Clyde. Clyde pushed open the gate and stepped inside, smiling all the while at his friend.
"This is Prince Clyde Mond," Varian said. "An old friend of your mother and I."
Eliza's eyes shot between Shawn and Clyde rapidly.
"The one Shawn's named after?" Eliza asked. Shawn did raise a little interest at this, the almost-four-year old finally giving Clyde a cursory glance.
"Yes," Clyde answered, "me and Ju-your mother were very close."
Eliza grinned merrily, like this was fantastic news that affected her in any way, and then took off back towards the house. She gripped her brother's hand, making him make a surprised 'oof' as he was pulled by his arm.
"Where do you two think you're going?" Varian called after them. Eliza didn't turn around as she pushed open the front door.
"To get mommy!" she yelled back matter-of-factly. She slammed the door behind her and Shawn without a second glance. Clyde laughed once under his breath as Varian sighed and turned back to Clyde.
"Sorry about that. Eliza often thinks before she acts and is always going this way and that." Varian did manage to smile again. "She has more of me in here than I would like to admit."
Clyde waved off the apology.
"Don't worry Varian," Clyde said. "They seem great. I've been waiting to meet them ever since I read about them in Juliet's letters."
At Juliet's name, Varian sobered a little, some of that cheery light disappearing and replaced by careful scrutiny.
"Juliet told me, you know. Why you left." Varian crossed his arms. "You were in love with her."
Clyde didn't hesitate as he answered.
"Still am."
Varian's eyes widened, and then he smiled.
"Well, that would explain why you stayed away so long," Varian said. Varian shook his head and scraped his feat along the ground. "She's missed you."
Clyde knew that. She had told him so in the many letters she had written, which far outweighed how many he had written to her.
"I missed her too. That's why I came back," Clyde said. Varian gave Clyde one final look, trying to get something Clyde didn't know out of his appearance, before turning on his heel.
"Come on, come inside," Varian said. "I know your leg must be killing you."
Clyde smiled gratefully and followed after Varian.
"You ninny!"
That wasn't what Clyde expected would be the first thing he heard Juliet say to him in almost ten years, but it was. She also hit him with a pillow too, smacking his face lightly over and over again with a plush navy pillow as Varian quickly escorted Eliza and Shawn outside for a walk.
"You're gone for ten years!" Juliet said, continuing to smack him. "You write me maybe a handful of times and you show up out of nowhere??!?"
Clyde reached for the pillow and tore it out of her grasp. He scowled at her as he threw the pillow to the side, sitting up straighter on the couch in Varian and Juliet's living room. Juliet was scowling too, eyes closer to fire than anything.
"Well, hello to you too," Clyde said. "I missed you too."
Juliet didn't even crack a smile.
"You're so lucky the twins are napping down the hall," Juliet whispered viciously. "Or I would be this close to yelling at you some more."
Maddie and Martin, the twins. Clyde hadn't got to meet the two youngest Wry children yet, but he would have to thank them for saving him from Juliet's wrath. Motherhood had tempered her.
Juliet sighed and shook her head.
"Why did you come back to Corona?" Juliet asked.
"Well, you see, Roman reinstated me to my post as —"
"You said you weren't coming back until you figured some things out," Juliet cut him off, acting as he if hadn't spoken at all. "Have you?"
Clyde nodded. "Yes."
Juliet raised a brow. "And?"
"I am still in love with you," Clyde said. He didn't try to say it sadly. He didn't say it to make her feel guilty. It was just a simple fact. He had long since accepted it. He was in love with her. Time apart hadn't changed that.
To her credit, Juliet reacted about as well as Clyde expected. She gave a simple nod and sat down next to him, crossing her ankles.
"That's...that's where we're still at?" Juliet said. Clyde's fingers fidgeted nervously, and he made a half-decent attempt to reach for his crutch.
"I can leave if this makes you uncomfortable," Clyde said. "I know when I left I was supposed to work through this. But I still — the feeling — it — it didn't go away Juliet. And I'm sorry, and I'll leave if you want me too. I just thought you should hear it in person from me."
Juliet looked at him incredulously.
"Clyde, you're still my best friend." She put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed comfortingly. "And I-I guess this is just what it is. I-I can't make your feelings go away for you. You going away didn't work. And I'm not going to send you now, since we know it doesn't work for you to do that."
"Then what to do we do?" Clyde said. "I've tried so, so hard to get over you. I worked for years and nothing. I'm still this way. What-what am I supposed to do?"
Clyde was dimly aware he was crying, something he was alerted to by Juliet reaching to wipe away his tears. He flashed back to all those years ago, when he had done the same for her, back when he planned to leave.
"You live," Juliet said. "You know that I — we — that an us never had a chance. That door was shut long ago, and it's far too late to open it ever again." Her hand slid down to take his, and he held it tighter than he ever had, trying to desperately recall the way it felt by just one touch. "But you're still my best friend. I love you. I want you to be around. But only if you can handle that, being around me, knowing that I'm only your friend. And that's the way it'll always be."
This was his choice, wasn't it? Staying here, letting himself get hurt by Juliet? Or leaving, and also getting hurt by her? She had a powerful effect on him, one she only vaguely knew the power of.
Could he do this? That was all he could think as he stared at Juliet. Could he do this to her? Hang around with this sword over there heads, knowing that Clyde felt this way? He never expected more from her, because then that wouldn't be real love, but that desperate hope that just maybe it could happen would never be completely vanished. No matter what Juliet said and what Clyde accepted, a deep part of him would always reject it and hope, even if he never acted on it.
This was his choice, he knew that. Juliet couldn't make it for him, because for her, there was no choice. She had a life, a home, a family. She would miss him, but survive. Now the question was, could he leave again and he survive? Ten years without his best friend at his side had been hard enough. He wasn't sure he could do a lifetime.
A cry sounded from the room over, and Juliet tore away from him to stand.
"I'm so sorry, but the twins need me to—"
"Can I come help?" Clyde asked, making his mind suddenly. Juliet blinked.
"What?"
"Can I help settle them down?" Clyde said, nervously. He rose to stand, tucking his crutch under his arm quickly. "I-I'd like for them to meet their honorary Uncle Clyde."
He could be Uncle Clyde and a best friend. He could do that, because the alternative, saying goodbye to her completely was too painful to ignore. It might make him selfish and bad and wrong to stay, to put them in this weird place, but he didn't care.
Juliet blinked again, and was silent for a very long moment. Then she smiled softly again.
"I'd like that too."