Kiba's POV. And on the phone is Ino. (Just to let you know, part of the italics is Ino talking into her phone)
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Chapter IV: Truth
Smile.
I'll always be gratified as long as I see your smile. I'll be satisfied enough if you were to be with me always. I need nothing else…
"Hey! Kiba, is Sakura really okay?"
"Of course"
"But Sakura said she's always going back to the hospital for check ups!"
"…"
"Hey… Tell the truth, Kiba……"
Since the day Sakura fell to the ground unconscious, the phone rang with those worried sick friends. Ino, Lee, Hinata…… They were all the same. At first, it was all 'She just felt dizzy, she'll be all better the next day'. That's what everybody thought at first. But now… the rumor is spreading around. 'She's going back to the hospital for her check ups' That rumor… The rumor that's getting a step closer to the truth.
The truth…? No, she can never hear the truth. But once this rumor spreads, Sakura will hear it soon enough. I'm so stupid… I tried so hard not to let this………----
'Hey… Tell the truth, Kiba……'
…Worries. That's what they all are. And that's what they will all be. I don't blame them for that, I do it too. But… you know that one day, the truth will start to flow by…
"…Okay…… but you better promise me you won't tell this to ANYBODY"
"O-okay…"
"Sakura is-------"
It was hard.
I don't care. I don't care who the hell it is, but someone, save me from this cruel spot! All I can do is pray, for god's sake! And tell……
I can't do anything………
"--------No…! You're lying………!"
"Why the hell would I lie?"
"N-no…… Sakura…"
"Don't cry…"
"Sakura is… going to be cured, right, Kiba?"
"I don't know! But I'm believing! I'm praying god damnit!"
"Why…? Why her…? Why her out of all people………?"
Yeah… Why her? Sakura has never done anything wrong! Why should she get punished for such things? What the fuck did she do…! Right now, there is no presence of 'god'. But if there was…… then right now, I would be…----
"But… we can't do anything"
"But, for her, we can protect her from all harm and not make her sad! That's what we can do!"
"…………"
"I don't care how deep this disease is! I'm sure Sakura will get over it!"
"…Yeah"
"------Kiba?"
"!"
My face went white. Sakura, did you just eavesdrop into our conversation…?
"Hey, what's wrong, Kib…------"
I cut the line off from Ino. I put the phone down and look over at her. It might have been too late… Sakura, that was just…-----
"Kiba… what's that suppose to be all about…?"
"Uh… no…"
The words won't come out! How should I organize these words? Shit!
"Kiba…… Is my sickness that horrible…?"
"…!"
I wasn't being careful enough. This house where Sakura lives. This house where she can roam about as she please. And at that nick of time… she has to listen! I promised! I promised to protect her and to not depress her anymore than that! I just promised…… right…?
But… but I……---
"……"
"S-Sakura… I was just----"
"………That's right! No wonder I wasn't able to do all the things I could do in the past! I'm in a horrible state now! I should be getting more rest and…"
"…?"
"This isn't good, right? I should be staying at the hospital, right?"
"Sakura……"
"Don't look at me like that Kiba……"
"---I'm sorry…"
I could only apologize. All I need is you, nothing else. All I can do is to protect you and let you feel safe…
But now, I just ruined it, in front of you. I can't possibly do anything now. I'm this bad at these kind of things! …Right? Can't I do anything right? And now, I see you knowing the truth. You stand there all worried and thinking of better things to do then to stay here. So sad, and you couldn't think of a way to……
You only smiled.
A forced smile, more like. The smile that shined on me made my heart ache even more. But, that wasn't the purpose, right Sakura? That smile was to make me feel more relaxed and, and…… to make me feel like at ease. Right? She tried so hard just for me. ……For me…… And I couldn't do anything. I haven't done anything for you. The time that's passed cannot be turned back, though I wish I could have… So then I can erase my mistakes and make YOU feel more at ease. But I can't do that. I just mentally killed you with my own two hands. That smile, crushed; your hopes, crushed; your happiness, crushed. I could surpass as a villain now.
-----Sakura…… I…
"Kiba…… am I…-----"
----------am I going to die?
It just felt like my heart has been ripped out of my chest, but death gave me another chance to live just to hear those words.
'Am I going to die?'
"……No… You're surely going to live"
"Surely? What's 'surely' supposed to mean! Say the truth, Kiba!"
"It's not a lie! You're going to be cured! Believe me!"
"Even if I believe…… sometimes that belief will fail!"
"-----!"
"All I wanted was the truth! All you could have done was to tell the truth! Kiba……… I… I HATE YOU!"
Like that, she left the house crying. Of course, who wouldn't? Because of me, I made her sad. And I lied to try and make her feel better, but it only got worse. It's all my fault. I'm the guilty one.
I couldn't even chase her down. It felt like my foot implanted itself to the floor. I couldn't move.
Sakura… I'm sorry……… I can't do anything……"
The tears wouldn't stop.