"What's wrong sir?"
"Tired."
"Why's that?"
"Lack of sleep."
Inspector Morse: Who Killed Harry Field? screenplay by Geoffrey Case
HER BURNING HEART
The Story of Lilia Derevko by JetNoir
Note: This is going to be an extremely episodic chapter, as I can hardly put an entire medical course into a chapter! However, I am indebted to the memoirs of FBI Special Agent Candice DeLong, who worked as a nurse, at a maximum-security psychiatric unit at a Hospital in Chicago, before joining the FBI. I haven't read it fully for quite a while, so a re-read is in order methinks! I recommend it however, and it's called 'Special Agent'. I'm also again extremely grateful for information provided by Penelope S Cartwright, who has been truly brilliant throughout. Thankyou! Now, the three years described in the chapter, can technically happen, as the FBI would accept someone who has trained and worked for the 'three professional years'. My chronology is on a very tight line, which I am coming close to breaking, so I get a very much-needed respite. Anyway, enough of my ramblings, thank you again to the above-mentioned people, and I hope you enjoy…
Additional Note: Having just finished this 'chapter', I have found to my frustration that is only a third of what should have been - but it ended up getting so long! Therefore, I am forced to split Chapter Nine into more than one part, so the next part(s) will be published under the same title, in the following chapters. It's not an ideal situation, but it should work.
CHAPTER NINE - Lock and Key (Part One)
Early August: 1992
Washington, D.C.
Lilia Derevko sat cross-legged on her bed, alone in the house, the sunlight fighting to get through the drawn curtains. She was staring at the telephone, a small black card clenched in her hand.
She closed her eyes, and breathed deeply, dredging memories up from the last few months.
"When you begin at University…if that is what you want to do…ring me on this number," he handed her a plain black card with a single phone number pressed in black, "and we'll talk about your future. Don't be scared…you have a long and glorious one ahead."
Her encounter with the infamous Dr Lecter. But why would he be interested in her? Why would she interest him? Then it hit her. So stupidly obvious. She was a killer. But how did he know that.
'Curiosity killed the cat'
She knew she had to ring him. She couldn't afford not to. He could destroy her. And Lilia knew that Dr Lecter loved destruction.
'But satisfaction brought it back'
So be it.
She picked up the receiver, and looking at the black card, swiftly dialled the number.
She waited as the beeps sounded, and it was a long time before the call was placed. Long-distance. Very long-distance.
"Pronto." The voice was soft and cultured. Lilia recognised it instantly, not that she needed to.
"Doctor Lecter?"
"Who is calling please?"
"Erm, its Miss Derevko, Doctor."
"Of course, my apologies. I don't know many people with Russian Accents. And school is finished. I heard your speech. Most impressive, and an interesting twist on Shakespeare. Congratulations, by the way, on graduating top of your class."
"Thankyou."
"Now…I believe that I requested you ring. I'm sure you're curious as to why I requested that…In short, you interest me, Miss Derevko. You are an alien, at first lingual, and then because you were born in another country. When you arrived, you were from an enemy country, and we both know how many Americans, as with other countries, can react to people who they deem 'hostile'. Tell me, Lilia, did they first oppress you? Hate you?"
"No, Doctor."
"Interesting. Well, that is certainly a good thing. Now…have you decided what you are going to do? The deadline is in a week I believe."
"I'm not sure yet…I was thinking about becoming a Doctor myself. I'm fascinated…perhaps obsessed with Biology. Also with psychology. And forensics."
"Interesting, interesting, interesting. Lilia…have you ever considered the Federal Bureau of Investigation. The three things you mentioned. I think it might suit you well."
"But I'm a killer! Why should I work for those who could capture me?"
"You would have to be careful. It would be dangerous. But you would have an advantage. There are two kinds of killer, Lilia, ones who kill for pleasure or profit, those who a crude and vile. Then there are those who kill when it is necessary for their own survival. For their sanity. You are not evil Lilia. You are not a monster. Have you ever killed an innocent person? Mason Verger…who you may know survived…was a paedophile. HE is evil. Killing is not always evil. Not always. Your advantage would be information. You would know things that others do not. Knowledge is the greatest power."
"Would you want me to help you?"
"No. I wouldn't want to take advantage of you. I fear that too many people have tried to take advantage of you. Your father amongst them. I want to set you free."
"You knew someone in the FBI, didn't you."
"Yes, her name is Clarice Starling. Someone else who should be set free. You have potential Lilia, but you are a conflicted soul. You must be wary. If you were to join the FBI, you would have to be wary. There is a saying: You fall in love with the FBI, but the FBI does not love you back. You would have to be detached. Do not get sucked in. Use them, as they use you. But that is not what you must do. Have you given thought to being a Practitioner? Or a Psychologist? You could help many people, or do many things."
"I like the idea of being with the FBI, but I had always considered myself as a Biologist."
"Well, you do realise that to join the FBI, you must do what they call, in inverted commas, 'a professional job', hmmm? You would have to train, and then do a job. So it's something to think about. Now; what about University. Are you thinking about The Ivy League?"
"Erm…I sort of decided against The Ivy League. I got so many scouts hassling me…well I didn't want to bother with them."
"Oh?"
"Yeah, well I went to Washington University Hospital, and they were really nice. With the practical elements. I think that I could do some good."
"Why haven't you applied yet?"
"But what if I'm wrong? I could be wasting my time."
"Education, Lilia, is never a waste. Even if you hate it, and drop out, you will still have learnt. You could start again, and find something better. Trust in yourself, and in your decision."
"Thankyou Doctor."
"My pleasure, Lilia. I'll keep watching over you. Know that everything will turn out all right. Now, I had best say Adieu."
The phone clicked as Lilia put down the receiver. She lay back on the bed, and smiled.
Some time later, Winona came home, bags of shopping under her arm. Lilia leapt downstairs.
"Well," said Winona, "you certainly look happier."
"I made a decision," said Lilia, "let me help you with the shopping, and I'll tell you all about it!"
--
The Remains of the Summer: 1992
Lilia and Kitty left the next day, with Lilia's application winging its way toward the University Hospital. It was a restful summer, as Lilia and Kitty went on their road trip, swept up in their own youth and happiness. While on the road, Winona managed to get through to Lilia, telling her that her application had been accepted.
When they returned, they spent the last week in each other's company, before something strange happened. Kitty disappeared.
Now, a cynic, who knows the whole truth, might immediately begin to suspect Lilia herself. But why should she kill her friend.
On the 9th of September, Lilia received the following letter:
My dearest L,
I can only apologise from the depths of my heart. I am forbidden to write more, except that my family is in trouble, legal trouble. We've been moved to Witness Protection - obviously I can't tell you why.
You're safe, as long as I stay away. You in turn can't come looking for me…I know you to well.
You will probably never hear from me again. Unless, when it's safe…I will come looking for you.
I love you, my friend. You were my sister. I know that you hate clichés, but it is true.
Be good to yourself, and live your life to the full!
My star,
K
"I love you too, my friend," Lilia whispered, heart aching, tears streaming down her face.
She decided to follow Kitty's advice.
--
12th September 1992
University Hospital, Washington, D.C.
Lilia sat nervously, her clothes smart, but not expensive, her usual ponytail tied up. She was sitting in one of the teaching rooms, in the front row, in front of the blackboard. Her books were at her feet, and she was noticeably alone in the crowds of chattering students.
She turned as someone walked into the classroom, a boy. Seeing the only seat was next to a pretty girl with brown hair, he smiled nervously, and sat next to her.
"Hi," he whispered, "I'm not late am I?" Lilia turned and shook her head:
"No," she whispered back, "the teacher's not here yet."
"What's your name? I'm James. James Wilkins."
"Lilia. Lilia Derevko. Though why we're introducing ourselves in mock-James Bond fashion I have no idea."
"Are you Russian?" asked James.
"Yeah,"
"Well, maybe that's a clue. You like films?" Internally Lilia sighed; she didn't want him to hit on her, certainly not this early:
"Yeah, sometimes."
"Well it's nice that I have something in common with somebody. I probably shouldn't admit this, but I'm really nervous."
"Same here," said Lilia, "I don't know what to expect."
Suddenly the room hushed, as a stressed looking man burst through the door, papers flying everywhere, his white coat streaming like a cloak:
"Hello," he said, in a hoarse, tense voice, dumping his papers on his desk, "I'm Doctor Willis. Pleasure to meet you all, and I apologise for my lateness. Emergency in ER. Which is why I suppose it's named so. Now…I am here to introduce you to our course. This is a blend of course, and as such, you will be expected to learn triple amount in three years. So we have a lot ahead of us. We will focus on becoming a physician, some forensics, and Biology. And this will be hard. Very hard. But if you succeed, you will have a far greater choice in life. So, may I wish you the best of luck, get out your notebooks, and let's begin."
--
13th September 1992
The lecture had just ended, and Lilia sat up, primping her hair slightly. She looked across the room, and caught James smiling at her. She smiled back, and he wound his way through the crowded room.
"Thanks, Lilia, I owe you one," he said, handing back the pencil he had borrowed - having forgot to bring one of his own.
"That's three times you owe me!" Lilia smiled.
"I stand humbly corrected," James said, "but thanks for saving me all this time. You can't draw with a pen."
"Well, you can," said Lilia, "just not very well. So I suppose it's a good thing one of us has a decent memory."
"Miss Derevko?" Lilia turned to see Dr Willis behind her.
"What can I do for you Doctor?" she asked. Willis smiled nervously.
"Could you come with me for a tick? Doctor Vallon wants to see you." Lilia made a mock-startled face:
"Am I in trouble?" she asked, knowing fine well she wasn't.
"No…no," said Willis, "it's…well it's a long story. You won't be kept long."
"Okey-dokey," said Lilia, gathering her belongings, "let's go." She turned, winked at James and said: "See you tomorrow. Bring a pencil!" James grinned and waved.
In the corridor, Lilia turned to Dr Willis: "So what is this about?"
"Really, it'll be better if you waited for Vallon. He'll explain it better."
"Yet mysterious," said Lilia.
"Doesn't matter," said Willis, "we're here now." He knocked on the door, and was told to enter.
"Ah, Miss Derevko," said Dr Vallon, director of the University and Hospital, "please, take a seat."
"Could I ask why it is I'm here?" said Lilia.
"No, you may not," said Vallon, and seeing Lilia's shocked face, smiled, "sorry, sorry. Bad joke. What I'm about to ask you is going to seem very strange. I read your psyche profile, and your application form. You said you were thinking of working towards the FBI. You realise that you'll need an addition three years in a professional job."
"Yes," said Lilia.
"Well, if you were to work while training, then it would still count as the three years. You are going to be here for three years." He steepled his fingers and leant forward, "We have a slight problem here, Miss Derevko. We are grossly under-staffed. I need additional support. I have been told that you are one of the quickest studies - you have a photographic memory. We need an acting nurse. You are the closest we have to someone qualified. Now, you will need a Doctor with you at all times, but we need help in ER, and our Maximum-Security Psychiatric Ward. It's a good salary, we'll give you all the help you need while studying, though you will need to take some tests to qualify. Like I said, you'll get all the help you'll need."
"Why me?" asked Lilia, "This is rather irregular. I've only been here a month…surely there are people searching for a job like this."
"No-one. We're out of options."
"Can I have some time to think about it? It's a pretty big decision."
"Sure, but not too long. Thankyou Miss Derevko."
"Thankyou Doctor."
--
When Lilia got home that night, she and Winona talked the offer over, for many hours. Eventually Lilia made the decision to take the job. She knew that it would be hard - but she didn't appreciate how hard it would be.
--
1st October 1992
Buenos Aires
Doctor Hannibal Lecter, stood gazing at the night sky from the balcony of his Apartment. It was beautiful here, but even the nights were hot.
He looked down on the city, at the festival of light. Torches blazed, and music filled the air, along with shouts and screams and laughs. It was beautiful, and Lecter smiled.
But he had been here a long time, perhaps too long. He wasn't sure that at the moment, he wanted Buenos Aires to be his permanent home, not now. He would head to the festival, and soon, but now, deep within the recesses of his Memory Palace, he drew his plans for a visit to Florence.
--
9th October 1992
Home of Winona Davies and Lilia Derevko; Washington, D.C.
Lilia breathed deeply, inhaling the scent of garlic and tomatoes. She plunged her fork into her Tagliatelle Bolognese, and took a big mouthful.
"It always was your favourite," smiled Winona, sitting at the opposite end of the table, and Lilia nodded, slurping up pasta, "and you still can't eat it in a-"
"Ladylike and refined manner," smiled Lilia, speaking in a mock-posh English accent, "so I eat like an oink-oink pig; like a dashed commoner, oh top hole, jolly hockey sticks!"
Winona looked at her niece for a second, and then exploded in a flood of laughter, which Lilia soon joined in.
After some minutes, Winona looked up, still grinning: "You know, I knew a very nice Brit, a long time ago. He was so charming and elegant."
"He was tall, dark and handsome, good in bed, funny," said Lilia, "yes, I know. Actually I'm sure he changes a little with each telling. Are you sure he wasn't a short, fat Lino Salesman from Manchester? Not that I have anything against Manchurians. Perhaps from Birmingham? Kent? London?"
"I give up," smiled Winona, "though I assure you, that nothing is false! Anyway, what about you? How are things?"
"Okay."
"Okay? Anything else?"
"Just okay."
"And what about Master James? Asked you out yet?"
"Auntie! James is a friend."
"So that's what they're calling it these days! What if he were to ask you out?"
"Well, put it this way, if he did…I wouldn't say no."
Winona smiled, "I'll have to remember that!"
--
31st October 1992
University Hospital; afternoon
"Lilia, hi!"
"James! How are things?"
"Stressful. How do you do it?"
"Do what?"
"Keep looking so calm. A serene wind in this tempestuous maelstrom."
"Been reading poetry again?" Lilia's voice was both pleased and gently teasing.
"Don't mock!"
"I'm not. I'm just pleased."
"Well don't get me started on William Wordsworth's 'I wandered lonely as a cloud'. How can you like it?"
Lilia grinned: "Actually I don't. I wanted to see what you're reaction would be. There are people who love it. I don't."
"Anyway," sighed James, "enough poetry. I, well, I was just wondering. The party tonight."
"The University Annual Hallowe'en Bash?"
"Yeah. Apart from the crummy name…er, are you going?"
"Yes. Why?"
"With somebody?"
"No…again, why?"
"Well, would you like to, er, go with me?"
"With you?"
"With me?" whispered James.
"Yes. Yes, I'd love to."
--
Later that night.
A cold wind swept around Lilia, rustling her long skirts, and petticoats.
"How did anyone breath in these damn things," she muttered, fingering her dress. It was an Elizabethan style, with corset, the works. And Lilia, although thoroughly enjoying the period trappings, was feeling the limitations.
"I believe that's where the fans used to come in," said James, who had crept up behind her, "you know: those of a wafty nature?"
"Wafty?" smiled Lilia.
"Well…alright I made it up. Can you describe it better?"
"Possibly. You look nice." James smiled:
"As you look beautiful. It's nice that we match." Lilia smiled, and blushed a little.
James costume matched Lilia's perfectly, ruffs, lace, the works. They had chosen to match; for both were aware of how Hospital Hallowe'en parties could be notorious. So they had chosen to protect each other.
"Shall we go in?" asked James.
"Certainly," smiled Lilia.
--
Some hours later.
The party had thinned a little, but Lilia and James remained close, gently chatting, and occasionally dancing. Every now and then, they indulged with a glass of champagne. Basically having a good time.
"What is it with horror?" asked James, "We are dressed as Elizabethan Vamphyric Ghosts, there are Frankenstein's Monster's, Zombies, you name it."
"It is because we like being scared?" Lilia said, "In Russia, they have never made any horror movie, and I wonder if they ever will. We had enough horror with our previous quote 'rulers' end-quote. People seem to like being scared. Maybe for the adrenaline?"
"Maybe. Hey, would you like to dance?"
Lilia smiled and agreed.
--
November - December 1992
Coming up to the first half-year marker, Lilia's studies were going well. She was happy, happy to spend time with James, happy with her course. The only mar, was her worry about Kitty. She decided to heed her friend's advice, and not search. She would have travelled the world over to find her…but it would be hard.
--
25th December 1992
Home of Winona Davies and Lilia Derevko; Washington, D.C.
"We wish you a merry Christmas," sang Winona,
"And a happy new year!" finished Lilia, smiling, " Now Aunt…are you sure you don't mind?"
"What? Your going to James' this afternoon. Course not! I'm glad you're seeing someone."
"It's not so much seeing someone…"
"So you're taking it slow. Doesn't matter," said Winona.
"Slow. Rather slow than fast."
--
31st December 1992
University Hospital; Washington, D.C.
One midnight to midnight.
"Yet another party!" smiled Lilia, "Oh our social life is so full these days!"
"No need to be sarky," James laughed, "I am rather enjoying these soirees we attend."
"Mmm, as do I."
"Behave!"
"What are you talking about? I am behaving!"
"10"
"9"
"8"
"7"
"6"
"5"
"Are we going to count down?" asked James.
"4"
"3"
"Not exactly," Lilia said, leaning in, and kissing him gently.
"2"
"1"
"HAPPY NEW YEAR!"
They broke off, and embraced.
"Happy New Year, indeed!" said James.
--
30th March 1993
The lesson of the day was dissection, part of the Pathology and Forensics half-year. It was something that Lilia found fascinating - especially considering her experience. But there was a problem; and it wasn't to do with the lessons.
The monster called Insomnia had raised it's ugly head again. For the first time in years, Lilia just couldn't sleep. And it wasn't as if she were sleepy, or falling asleep. James kept glancing at her from across the room - he had more or less guessed - and Lilia was grateful for his moral support.
Everything was in shades of grey, nothing seemed real, that aching feeling behind her eyes, and the awful dryness of her tongue.
She couldn't cope with it much longer. She was going to have to find a way to sleep…and soon.
This what hell was…and she couldn't lock it up into a little box, and throw it into the river.
--
2nd May 2003
The Nightingale Moon Restaurant; Washington, D.C.
The dinner was delicious, and Lilia was enjoying herself thoroughly. She was just about coping with the work, and her job; though if it got much harder in her present state, she wouldn't be able to manage much longer.
Despite her exhaustion, Lilia was in a playful mood. She looked up at James and smiled slyly.
"Jamie?" That got James' attention: "What is it about men and sex?"
"What?" said James, "I'm confused."
"Glad to hear it. Maybe it's just me…but I've only had one boyfriend before you, and he turned out to be a real creep. I just wanted to know why men are so obsessed with sex."
"Well, it's not as if I am obsessed. You're sort of lumping me in with the rest of my gender."
"Okay…well, maybe I am."
"Please tell me you're not going to go down the 'all men are beasts' route. I haven't done anything to offend you have I?"
"Oh, no! I'm just in one of my funny moods."
"Never would have guessed. In response to your question: is it due to the Neanderthal mating instinct. You know, breed of die, or something like that. Genetic leftover."
"You know…that makes sense. You see James, my last boyfriend, waayy back in the day. He was obsessed with it. He ended up dumping me, because I wouldn't sleep with him. You know, I could have ripped his testicles off. I really could have."
"Well it sounds like he deserved it," said James, "and Lilia. I'm in no rush. I'm more than happy to take it slow."
"Nice and slow," said Lilia, "I like the sound of that."
--
What We Did On Our Summer Vacation - Prelude (Last Day of Term)
"Would you like to go on holiday, Lil?" asked James, "Maybe for a weekend?"
Lilia looked up, mock-irritated: "Where Jam? Anyplace in mind?"
"Well," said James, "I've always wanted to go to Florence."
Lilia looked up, eyebrow raised.
"Well, that certainly sounds interesting…"
To Be Continued
in
LOCK AND KEY - Part Two
Note: Firstly, apologies for using The Nightingale Moon (the restaurant in Tourniquet). Perhaps you could consider it an anachronistic Washington outlet? Nope, thought not. Special thanks must go to BeatricePortinari for inspiration regarding Lilia's and James' Elizabethan-style vampire costumes. What Lilia said about there never being a Russian horror film is right, until the recent film Night Watch. The next part of Lock and Key will be coming soon, and hopefully it won't be as long as this sixteen page chapter! (I think it's my longest so far). I hope you enjoyed it, and please review!
Disclaimer: Hannibal is copyright to Thomas Harris; and the story, plus original characters to me. This story has been written on the understanding that you may read it and print it out; but you may not pass it off as your own, hire it out, or sell it for money. You also may not put it on your own or any other web page without my express written permission. Thankyou!
JetNoir