HA! I made a very small second chapter. Sorry, I was listening to the song Valleygirls, when I wrote this.

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Paul prised his lips off of the evil toilet and sauntered out of the bathroom. He was bored of the Toilet. It didn't appreciate him, and it couldn't for fill his needs.

He wandered through the Hogwarts corridors until he found Suze and an albino boy curled up on the floor, singing tragic romance songs.

Very badly.

"Whats wrong, Suzie? Do you miss your precious little Jesse?" he sneered, leering down at them.

The Albino boy, whose name was Draco Malfoy, started drooling at the sight of Paul.

Suze jumped up.

"Whats wrong Paulie-poo? Did your toilet ditch you?"

Paul flinched. He missed the toilet already, as boring as it was.

"Whatever," Paul snapped, "Lets go make out!"

Suze happily agreed, having forgotten to take her pills, and they both found an empty classroom to entertain themselves in.

When Paul kissed suze, he was strongly reminded of the toilet.

Meanwhile, Jesse had come to Hogwarts, looking for Suze, because he was banned from band camp.

Apparently your musical instraments are for musical purposes only.

He stumbled upon the dead Harry, who had previously drowned in his own saliva.

He thought he was Suze, and, being devastated that his love was dead, he gave Harry mouth to mouth to bring him back to life.

Once Harry began breathing, Jesse noticed that he was smelly and covered in Vomit. He also noticed that he was boobless.

"Nombre De dios," He cried, "How could I have thought that this vile child was my beautiful Susannah!"

At that precise moment Paul and Suze came out from the classroom, both looking rather dazed and muffled.

"Wow, Suze, you've gotten better. Who have you been practising on?"

Suze giggled, "You wouldn't know him … he's an OLD friend if you know what I mean…"

Suze suddenly saw Jesse.

Jesse saw her.

Paul saw Harry.

Harry saw Suze.

Jesse saw Paul.

Paul saw Jesse.

Harry saw Jesse and Paul.

Paul and Jesse stripped down to there purple speedo's and started having a big wrestle in a large and random puddle of mud.

Suze watched in delight.

So did Harry.

So did Draco Malfoy.

So did The Emo boy and bushy haired girl.

So did all the other students at Hogwarts.

Hagrid was even selling popcorn.

Eventually Severus Snape, the headmaster, (Dumbledore was on holiday with Doctor Slaski) came out and broke it up. Then, seeing as Jesse and Paul didn't even attend Hogwarts, sent them away. Later on he and Professor McGonnagall at their own heads, but nobody really cared. They were to busy writing down their recounts on the great Mud Fight.

Eventually Suze got bored and dragged Harry away.

"Comeon harry, lets go stay with Adam and Erny. This school is like, totally bogus!"

So Suze and Harry were adopted by Adam and his wife, Sister Ernestine.

Occasionally Father Dom would come to visit, and he'd give them free turkeys.

Oh how they loathed those Turkeys.

THE END