Hello! I finally updated. I found some inspiration. I have nothing against Mary Sue's or OC's or anything, by the way. And the whole –long lost sister- thing isn't that bad either.
ANYWAY! This chapter isn't as random or funny as the first four, but it's an update. Maybe next chapter I'll add a random make out scene, that'd be funny.
THANKS TO ALL MY PRECIOUS REVIEWERS! Y'all really boost my ego.
WARNING: UNEDITED AND VERY SHORT.
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Brad Ackerman liked to think he was a great catch. He thought of himself as an attractive, handsome, charming, interesting and intelligent young man.
Unfortunately, not many women considered fart jokes charming and he never understood that just because you have a very large head, it doesn't make you intelligent!
Alas, Poor Brad-ums was a hopeless case, and he never did find someone who appreciated him for his talents (What were they again? Wrestling, Hmm, eating, definitely, What about kissing? No, no. Definitely not. I know! Swearing! Yes, Wrestling Eating and Swearing. And maybe sarcasm, no, he wasn't smart enough to be sarcastic either.)
As you've probably realised, he was not the sharpest tool in the shed. Or the brightest star in the sky. Or the greenest grass. Or the fluffiest sheep – Ok. You get the picture now?
Yes, our dear Brad-ums, was a rather un-intelligent young boy, and he was rather delusional when it came too … well, everything, actually.
So, as you can imagine, he couldn't seem to get a girlfriend. He thought of Suze, but she was his stepsister (Or maybe that was just his excuse), he thought of Kelly, but she was too smart…. For him at least, he thought of Sister Ernie but she was taken (DAMN!), he thought of Father Dom.
So Brad had never had a girlfriend. Or even a boyfriend. With the exception of Debbie, but she was a transvestite. She'd auditioned for 'The Rocky Horror Picture Show' last year. She'd even invited Brad to come along (Author snorts imagining Brad singing time-warp in a French maid outfit), but he told her he didn't want to 'Cramp her style'.
Besides, she was turkey feed now anyways.
Brad was sitting in his bedroom, feeling very sad and loser-y when something strange happened.
Out of the blue popped ….. A Mary Sue.
(A/N: You do know what a Mary Sue is …. Right?)
But this was no normal Mary Sue. She had a pink afro. She wore a pear of pink leopard skin Speedo's over a pair of black leggings. She wore an enormous green t-shirt which was tucked into her leggings) that read 'I LIKE MONKEYS!'
Guess what. She was Paul's long lost sister.
Brad was very happy. He proposed. She said yes.
They had 10 babies: Boo Bah, Franny, Bob, Bobbitt, Debbie, Rocky, Mario, Lewigi, Pickachu, Power Puff, and Squi- Wait, that's more than ten. Whatever.
Suze, Harry, CeeCee and Adam all appeared and tried toload their massive machine guns- all of a sudden Father D blew up the house with a bomb, killing everyone in it.
Paul came along with an army of toilets. Father D grabbed his army of turkeys. The turkey fought with the toilets, beak against seat, squawking and flushing.
Eventually Paul got hungry and ate all the turkeys. Then Brad and the Mary Sue crawled out of the rubble of the explosion, completely unharmed. Their children didn't surface though. They were all dead. Everyone cried. Except Paul, because he was an ass.
Father Dom decided to become a nun, Paul decided to demolish his toilet army and go make out with a duck, and Brad and the Mary sue ran off to New Zealand to eat sanwidges.
Later on Jesse came along to the Ackerman house, only to see it had exploded. He cried for a bit, and then went to McDonalds. I'm lovin' it.
THE END
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That's it. I like to think that it was as good as the other ones but…. Meh. Hehehehehe. Debbie. Transvestite. Brad. Babies. I apologise for the shortness of it.
REVIEW! Please!