Author's notes: hey all, the new chapter is here! Im not happy with this chapter for some reason, probably because I'm not good with fight scenes, but no matter what I do to it, it doesn't seem to look any better. So I apologise in advance for the shotty chapter. But don't forget to review! also it's exam time for me so the next chapter might not be up for a couple of weeks!

Ch4: don't tell Remy

Rogue walked around her room, collecting all the books she'd need for her first day back at College. Her summer holidays had finished and she wished she didn't have to go back. Her college was one town over, but she decided not to live on campus. Scott and Kurt also went to the same college. She preferred to drive there, and because Scott and Kurt felt the same way, she had someone to drive to college with. For their first day back, Scott, Kurt and Rogue had decided to drive up together.

"Knock Knock!"

Rogue turned to face the doorway to see Logan standing there. Rogue smiled. It had been another two weeks since she and Logan had decided to secretly see each other. So far it was working, and to everyone else, it looked like Rogue and Logan had sorted out their differences since the 'argument'.

"Just came to wish you luck," Logan smiled. He took a step forward into the room. He and Rogue made a strict rule that they wouldn't do anything unless it was under cover of darkness. During the day, anyone could walk in on them. "Have you got everything?"

Rogue checked her bag again. "Yep, think so."

"Come on Rogue! We're gonna be late!" Scott called from the hallway. Rogue rolled her eyes.

"Looks like ah gotta go!" She quickly gave Logan a peck on the cheek and left the room.

'Maybe this is as good as it's gonna get for me. Ah should be happy, but why do ah feel like ah'm putting on an act when ah'm with Logan?'

----------------------------------------------

It was the end of the day and Scott was driving Kurt and Rogue home from college. It was a good two-hour drive back so they tried to keep themselves occupied with a game of eye-spy.

"Eye-spy vith my little eye, somezing beginning vith 'V'!" Kurt began.

"What the hell begins with a V?" Scott commented. He and Rogue looked around for anything that began with a V.

"Very nice car?" Rogue guessed.

"Nope!" Kurt smiled.

Scott smiled and rubbed the side of his car. He loved his little red convertible "Oh, why thank you, Rogue!" he smiled.

Rogue laughed. "It's tha only thing ah can think of that starts with V!"

"Well I give up!" Scott grunted.

"Rogue, do you give up?" Kurt asked. Rogue nodded. "It's a vindow!" Kurt laughed.

"Window starts with a 'W', you knob!" Rogue playfully punched Kurt in the arm.

"Okay, mein turn again!" Kurt said gleefully as he looked around for something to use. "Ah!" he squealed as he looked behind them.

"Does it start with an A?" Scott asked, unable to tell what Kurt's little outburst was for.

"Nein! Look! Behind us!"

Scott looked in his rear view mirror while Rogue turned around. Sure enough there were three metal orbs heading their way.

"Acolytes!" Rogue yelled. "Scott! Floor it!"

Just as Rogue had instructed, Scott pressed down on the accelerator, but no matter how fast he went down the deserted highway, the orbs were right behind him. "Shit!" Scott yelled out. "I can't lose them!"

"Then we're gonna have tah fight them off!" Rogue yelled.

Scott nodded and pressed the brakes. The car slowed down and when it came to a stop, the three orbs landed on the road a few metres away from them. Rogue, Scott and Kurt got out of the car. Rogue leaned closer to Kurt. "Hey. Remember what we learned in tactics class with Logan?" Rogue whispered. She then whispered what she wanted Kurt to do when the orbs opened. Kurt smiled and nodded when he heard what Rogue wanted him to do. Scott stood ready with his hand on his visor. He was ready to shoot anyone who came out of the orbs.

The three Xmen stood ready as the orbs slowly opened. Then they saw who their attackers were. Colossus, Pyro and Gambit. Remy got out of the metal orb and looked right at Rogue, as if no one else was there but the two of them. His expression was neutral, with no feelings so that Rogue couldn't tell what he felt about seeing her again. She wanted him to feel pain for leaving her, feel a longing to touch her again- something!

"Remy," Rogue whispered to herself. She hadn't seen him for close to a month now, and she felt hurt when he looked at her as if he never loved her. But Remy continued to stare at her. It was making Rogue feel uncomfortable, because if Remy didn't love her, then why was he staring.

"Well, G'day there, losers!" Pyro greeted, casually waving to the Xmen.

"What do you want?" Scott yelled.

Pyro smirked. "Just a lil' practice session with you guys, mate," He replied. "Nothing personal."

Rogue watched in the corner of her eye as Kurt moved so that he was standing right behind her. Colossus pointed. "Oh look. The little one is scared." The large Russian man still hadn't brought up his body armour, and Rogue figured it was because he felt that he didn't need to yet.

Rogue knew what was going to happen next. They were all going to fight, and she wanted to make the first move. She smirked, she quickly whispered, "Colossus," to Kurt and Kurt nodded. She felt Kurt put his hands around her waist, and the acolytes laughed.

"He's so scared! The poor bugger's gotta have a hug from the girl!" Pyro laughed with Colossus. Remy remained silent. He was still staring at Rogue and it made Rogue feel uncomfortable, as if he could see right through her. She doubted he could tell she was sleeping with Logan. Suddenly she felt guilty, as if she'd betrayed Remy. She couldn't look him in the eye. She missed him and still prayed that Remy would come back to her. Rogue, remembering the impending attack, turned her attentions back to Pyro and Colossus. The big brute was so cocky that he hadn't even changed to his metal form yet. And Rogue hoped he didn't realise to change yet. They were distracted while they teased Kurt.

Rogue smiled at Pyro and Colossus and replied, "Not really." It was then she saw it on Remy's face. He knew what was going to happen next. He was also part of that tactics class with them before he left. Rogue called out, "Now!" and Kurt ported them away.

Just as Remy had yelled out "Watch out!" to Colossus, Kurt had already ported Rogue right behind the large Russian. Rogue grabbed the large Russian's arm and began to absorb him.

Pyro brought up large flames and began aiming the flames to get Rogue, but then he saw Kurt's tail wrap around his wrist. "What the?" Pyro exclaimed, but then he was ported away by Kurt. Kurt ported Pyro away from Rogue to allow her time to absorb Colossus enough to knock him unconscious. Kurt ported Pyro a few metres away, closer to Scott so that the boys could handle Pyro together.

Remy stayed in the same spot. He watched as Colossus dropped to the ground. That guy was going to be sore in the morning. Remy waited for Rogue to take him on next. He remembered Logan teaching them in tactics class. Kurt was to help get Rogue to the strongest mutant there, preferably Colossus, Magneto or Blob, so that she could absorb them and have a way of defending herself. Remy couldn't believe he hadn't thought of it before. If he did, he would have told Colossus to bring up his body armour. But then again, he wouldn't have the chance to take on Rogue one on one.

When they sparred back at the mansion, Rogue only won if they weren't allowed to use their powers or weapons. She was more skilled than him at hand-to-hand combat, but as soon as Remy was allowed to use his deck of cards or his adamantium staff, he always had the unfair advantage. This time Rogue had an unfair advantage. She had Colossus' powers and she was now walking towards him with Colossus' armour covering her entire body.

Rogue walked over to Remy. She wanted so badly to hold him and tell him how much she loved him. But she knew that wasn't going to happen. He was now part of the acolytes and he was here for one reason; to beat the crap out of her, Scott and Kurt. She looked at him with sad eyes, and searched his demon eyes for.. something; Some recognition that he still loved her. Seeing Remy standing there, Rogue felt extremely guilty for what she'd been doing with Logan. Her thoughts were torn between Logan and Remy. She never wanted Remy to know what she was doing with Logan. She felt ashamed for sleeping with Logan, but she also felt that Logan was willing to be there for her and that maybe with Logan, her life was as good as it was going to be. Rogue walked up to Remy until she was only a foot or so away from him. She knew that with the body armour, Remy had no way of stopping her, and Remy knew that too. But by the hurt look in Rogue's eyes, he wasn't sure if she wanted to pummel his head in or hug him. Remy took another step back.

Rogue saw him move back. "Remy," Rogue said softly. She wanted to cry. 'He doesn't want anything to do with me!' she thought to herself.

Remy watched as Rogue stood motionless, staring into his eyes. There was no way for him to beat her, and he couldn't bear to see her look so hurt. There was no denying that he still felt something for her, but he couldn't let his feelings get in the way anymore. He was an acolyte now. "If ya gonna do it, then do it already!" Remy yelled.

Rogue blinked back her tears and realised what had to be done. She had to finish the fight. The orbs that carried the acolytes don't fly by themselves, which mean that Magneto was close by. No doubt he was watching the fight. Rogue took a deep breath and nodded. She grabbed hold of Remy's arm and concentrated on absorbing him. But she couldn't stop thinking about her escapades with Logan and her guilt. Even though it was Remy who left her, she still felt like she was still betraying Remy. Her feelings for Remy and her guilt for sleeping with Logan consumed her. She was touching Remy for the first time in a month and she never wanted to let go. She never wanted him to leave her again. Rogue, with all her feelings eating away at her, she couldn't concentrate enough to absorb Remy.

Something was wrong. She wasn't absorbing him, but something was happening. Then Rogue realised what she'd done.

Her eyes widened and looked right into Remy's demon eyes. "Oh no!" she whispered. She looked up at Remy and realised that her powers she'd taken from Colossus were leaving her. She looked back down at Remy's arm and the skin on Remy's arm where Rogue was holding him was turning to metal. She was accidentally passing her powers and memories on to Remy, rather than absorbing him. And she had no idea how she was doing it. She figured that it might be the next stage in her powers.

Remy's eyes were wide with shock. He realised what was happening and ripped Rogue's hand off his arm. He watched as his whole body covered itself in metal. Now he knew what it was like for Rogue when she absorbed someone. He had to gain control of his new powers and he had to sort through the new memories he'd received from her. Rouge fell to the ground and watched as Remy tried concentrating on bringing himself back to normal. After a few seconds, he managed to turn his skin back to normal, but he stopped moving, as if he were thinking about something.

Then it hit like a kick to the stomach. Remy looked at Rogue with anger in his eyes. Rogue knew then that she'd accidentally given Remy her memories. Her memories of being with Logan. "Oh shit!"

Remy reached into his back pocket and pulled out his deck of cards. Rogue started to shuffle backwards as she watched the deck glow a deep red colour as Remy charged the deck. "Remy," She sobbed. "I'm sorry!"

Remy didn't look at her. He stared at the ground as Rogue moved away. He was hurt. He hated what he saw Rogue do with Logan. "Get away," He growled softly. Rogue didn't move. He knew that once he had broken up with Rogue, she was allowed to do whatever (or whoever) she wanted to, but Remy felt betrayed. He never told Rogue that he still liked her, but he made the choice to leave. He figured that maybe he had brought it on himself, but he felt disgusted that she was sleeping with Logan. He now had fragments of Rogue's memories. She felt alone, rejected by Remy and now she was in the arms of another man- their teacher of all people! Remy was angry, real angry. So angry that he wanted to throw the entire charged deck at Rogue. But his conscience told him that deep down he didn't want Rogue to die. He wouldn't be able to live with himself if he killed her. "Get away from me before I start throwing the cards at ya'!" He yelled. Rogue had never heard such fury come from Remy. She scrambled to her feet and ran to the car.

Scott had just blasted Pyro with his optic beam and turned to hear Remy yelling at Rogue, but he had no idea why Remy was so mad. Rogue was now running towards the car and so Scott and Kurt followed suit.

"Gambit!" Came a booming voice. It was Magneto. "Finish her!"

Rogue jumped in the back seat and waited for Scott and Kurt to get in the car. As soon as Scott jumped into the driver's seat, Rogue tapped him on the shoulder. "Get us the hell outah here!"

Scott wasted no time in flooring it and getting them away from Remy and Magneto.

Rogue looked back at the vision of Remy's figure getting smaller with the distance as they drove away. He was still looking at her, but as they drove away, she couldn't make out the anger on his face anymore. She was glad she couldn't see it anymore. She couldn't bare to see Remy so angry with her.

Scott looked in the rear view mirror and could see Rogue sitting in the back. Scott realised that she was at the point of tears as she turned back to face the front. "What was that all about?" Scott asked. "I thought it would've been you who would have done all the yelling," He explained. Scott knew that Remy's departure from the mansion left Rogue feeling dead inside for weeks, but he didn't expect that Remy would be the one to do all the yelling when they finally saw each other again.

Rogue looked off to the side. "It's personal," Rogue replied. "But ah realised that ma powers don't just absorb anymore," She explained, trying to change the subject.

"Vat do you mean?" Kurt asked.

"It looks like ah can also pass on powers, instead of just absorbing them."

"So zat's vy I saw Remy turn to metal!" Kurt exclaimed. "Zat vas way cool!"

Scott, always the leader, replied, "It was cool, but you better tell the professor when you get back."

"Vell, I thought it was cool!" Kurt exclaimed. "And zat move where I ported you behind Colossus vas so cool! He had no idea it vas coming!"

"Yeah, but I don't know how many times that's going to work now. They're gonna know that you're gonna port Rogue if you're standing right next to her," Scott explained. "We'll have to go through some new tactics with Logan."

Rogue sat silently in the back as Kurt and Scott talked about battle tactics. She was in her own little world. She felt guilty about sleeping with Logan in secret. She felt like she was constantly lying to her friends by hiding it, and she now felt like she had to lie again whenever they asked why Remy got mad. She hated her life. It was all so complicated. Seeing Remy, she just wished that he'd never left and that they could go back to being happy together. But she knew that that would never happen again.

'Ah can't keep doing this!' She thought to herself. 'Ah feel like all ahm doing is acting! Ah feel like being with Logan is my only chance at finding someone who'll love me, but then why aren't ah happy? Why do ah feel like ah want out?'

When this began

I had nothing to say

And I get lost in the nothingness inside of me

I was confused

And I let it all out to find

That I'm not the only person with these things in mind

Inside of me

But all the vacancies the words revealed

Is the only real thing I got left to feel

Nothing to lose

Just stuck, hollow and alone

And the fault is my own

The fault is my own

(Somewhere I belong – Linkin Park)

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--Three years ago--

The X-students were all gathered in the living room. Xavier had asked them all to gather there. All he'd told them that there was a new mutant joining them at the mansion, and he felt that he needed to talk to all the students about it.

"Who do you think this like, new person is?" Kitty asked. Kitty sat on the couch with Scott and Jean. Rogue sat on one of the arms of the couch, while Kurt perched himself of the other.

"Ah dunno," Rogue replied. "But for the professor to be gathering us like this, it's either someone special, or someone we're not gonnah like staying here."

"Like, I hope he's cute!" Kitty smiled to herself and imagined herself with a new boyfriend.

Kurt looked at her, jealous that Kitty was fantasising about anyone but him. "How do you know it's a guy? Maybe it's a girl!"

Rogue crossed her arms. "Well, ah don't care who it is, as long as they leave me alone!" She grumbled to herself.

They waited for a few more minutes before the professor walked in with Logan.

Scott stood up as soon as the professor entered the room. "Professor, what's going on?" Scott asked.

Xavier stopped his wheelchair and Logan stood next to him and crossed his arms. Xavier lifted his hand up in a stop motion. "Scott, please sit. I will explain," He replied. Scott sat down back on the couch.

"Now, I have asked all of you to meet me here because the young man that wishes to join us here as an X-man is someone you all know. The reason for this meeting is so that I can have the opportunity to hear any protests you all have now."

"Like, who is the new guy?" Kitty asked.

Xavier looked up at Logan and nodded at him. Logan then uncrossed his arms and turned around. He walked to the door and opened it. "Come on," He said to the new student, ushering the young man into the room.

Gasps could be heard throughout the room as Remy LeBeau walked into the room. Scott shot up off his seat. "He is staying here!" Scott protested.

Xavier nodded. "This is why I wanted you all to settle any disputes you might have, here and now so that there are no problems while young Mr. LeBeau stays here," Xavier explained.

Rogue looked at the Cajun. Every time they'd met, they were trying to kill (or just hurt) each other. When they first me, Remy almost blew Rogue's hand off with a charged card. Then there was also that time she was hypnotised by Mesmero and kissed Remy. Rogue blushed when she thought about how she'd kissed Remy. She was thankful that no one would really be able to see her blushing under her heavy gothic make up. She never told a soul about kissing Remy though. She didn't know what they'd think of her secretly liking this acolyte. Rogue, in her daze, didn't realise that Remy was staring right back at her.

'Oh Gawd! Ah hope he can't read minds!'

Rogue stopped looking at the Cajun and turned her attentions back to the professor, who was explaining that Remy had changed sides and that if anyone had anymore protests about it, to see the professor personally.

"Rogue," The professor called. Rogue realised that the professor was talking to her and she quickly stood up off the end of the couch. "Would you show Remy to his room?"

Rogue's eyes widened. "Me!" She exclaimed. "Why can't Scott.." Rogue turned to Scott and could practically see red glowing around the edges of his sunglasses. "Okay.. Ah'll do it," she groaned.

"I'll how him, professor!" Kitty squealed as she jumped to her feet.

Xavier shook his head. "That's quite alright, Kitty. I'm sure Rogue will be fine."

Rogue looked at Remy and he was smirking at her. She walked towards the door, giving tyring to ignore his smirk as she passed him. "Follow me, swamp rat," She groaned again.

After Rogue and Remy exited the room, Logan looked at the professor and rolled his eyes. Logan then heard the professor's voice in his head. "Rogue's the one with the closest thing to a friendship with Remy. They'll be fine."

Outside in the hallway, Rogue could feel Remy's eyes burning on the back of her head. He was walking a good metre behind her and it was irritating her. "Would ya walk next to me at least!" She ordered. "Ah can't stand the idea of ya looking at me like that!"

Remy did as Rogue instructed and walked next to her. "How could ya possibly know how Remy be lookin' at ya, chere?"

Rogue rolled her eyes. She looked at him and saw that smirk on his face again. "'Cause ya haven't stopped lookin' at me like that since ya got here!"

"Remy can't help it, chere," Remy took Rogue's gloved hand, but Rogue, still being unable to touch, stopped walking and pulled her hand back forcefully.

"Don't ever touch me, swamp rat. Understand? Don't ever touch me!" Rogue yelled angrily. She hated herself for lashing out like that but she felt it was needed to stop everyone from touching her. She wanted them to fear her because she could kill them if she touched anyone for too long.

Remy looked at her with sad eyes. "Remy not afraid of yo' powers, chere," He said softly.

Rogue glared at him and continued walking towards Remy's new room in the boys wing. "Yeah, well ah am," She growled to herself. She wasn't sure if Remy heard it or not because she'd said it so softly. Deep down she wished he'd heard it. She hated being touched. She was constantly afraid that maybe she'd absorb someone through her clothes. But deep down, she longed for touch. When someone would touch her covered arm, she'd pull back and act out, but deep down, she longed for someone to touch her and hold her just that little bit longer.

Remy watched as Rogue stomped her way down the hallway. "Wait, chere!" He smiled as he ran after her. "Remy didn't mean t' offend you!"

Rogue looked at Remy, who had now caught up with her. "Well, just don't do it again, okay?" Rogue said with a little less harshness she'd just unleashed onto Remy.

"Remy promise," He replied. "But if ya change ya mind, and wanna give Remy a kiss.."

Remy's proposal was cut short when Rogue playfully hit him in the arm again.

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When I think of you girl I get that feeling
I need a hit of you baby
Girl head is spinning
And you got me feenin' for your love
Girl you got me going crazy

You don't have to worry

Girl you know I'm down

I'm addicted to you baby

All day I'm thinking of you
All day I wonder where you go
And what you do
I'm a fiend for you
All day I wonder where you are
Girl you know you got my heart
I can't stop
Baby I'm a fiend for you
All day, all day, all day, all day, all day

(Guy Sebastian – Fiend for you)