Warnings: I just love Hiei when he's depressed

The Wielder of BlackFire:

The Legend Lives Part II-Rose's Renaissance

Chapter Eleven: Contemplation

A small black figure made its way through tall, regal trees. Their step was without speed, without caution, but bold, yet thoughtful as well. The destination of that step was undetermined, picking its way through the trees without thought, relying on instinct to lead them to somewhere safe. Not that this certain fire youkai needed to avoid any possible trouble. But it would not suit his mood at this moment. It was as if his feet had a mind that functioned on their own. And it felt as though that were true. He was numb to the thought of actually directing them, instead letting them track through uncharted territory.

An afternoon sun filtered softly down through the slivers of cracks in the thick tree canopy. The golden pastel spread warmly over the leaf litter below, as though to light the path that his feet took.

He could feel the wrongness. And it was so very wrong. His eyes skimmed softly over the ground, watching the sway of his black cloak blindly. Listening to the gentle crunch of deceased leaves with deaf ears. This was wrong.

She was Thorn, at least in part. Yet the twin of the woman denied it, and with such conviction. The girl denied her own, witnessed, death. And thus, being witness, was the truth, or must hold some logic at least. That was proof that something other than mere unconsciousness had occurred that day.

Rose might not have her memories, which was their proof that these things had happened, even though they had told her, as well as showed her what had happened, but she could at least be a little more open to the fact that what she witness could very well possibly be the truth. She denied that it was really her on the tape. That she saw the truth. Yet, she still did not except the fact that it was at least possible. And yet, it lay right before her very eyes! And yet…

Hiei's eyes rose upward slightly as he stopped, pondering still more over this thought.

Perhaps she believed exactly what people had told her to believe. What had been expectable for her to think. She is not one who wished to stand out, and perhaps it is why she denied any chance of something like the truth actually happening. But perhaps she was afraid to remember. Perhaps pain lay in trying to remember. Or maybe even, just perhaps, she didn't want to remember at all. Perhaps she…

Hiei blinked once. That was far too many 'perhaps' for his tastes.

"Where are you, Thorn?" he asked himself in a whisper that a breath of a breeze stole away. He looked up at the tree branches above them as they swayed slightly, as if to give him a message in a code he could not understand. He stood there quietly, allowing the breeze to rustle his cloak against the fabric of his pants, murmuring fingers of air slithering against him.

Time had passed since Hiei had last seen Thorn. Well, unless one counted the body she had once occupied. The one she still did, but unconsciously. But one could not count Rose. The girl that had helped to create the woman Thorn, certainly was not Thorn, although alike they might be. Yet that was to be expected. After all, Thorn was born from that soul. In reality, although the youkai did not except the concept very well, Rose was the original of the two. She had taken the Black Blaze from his stand, she had learned from him, had agreed to create Thorn. She had agreed to fuse part of her very own soul with a portion of his to create Thorn. Thorn: the powerful being been the result of the experiment, the combining of the two souls. A being. She was neither human nor demon, although her body had been that of a mortal and her spirit, her essence, had been that of a youkai. She was practically a hanyou, or half-demon, having the blood of both the ningens and the youkai. It was a confusing matter that he no longer wished to think about.

But he knew, that if he had told her that he felt humans were useless as he had to Rose a few days before, she wouldn't have argued with his opinions. Yet, she would not have agreed with him on the subject either. Her respect for Rose ran far too deep, and her pride too pristine in her mixed bloodlines.

Life was, oh who the hell was he trying to kid? Life is still unfair. Pain pronged through him. The truth was full of pain. Thorn had known this through experience. Rose probably did as well, conscious of it or not. She had suffered greatly from the ordeal with BlackFire. Probably the most.

Leaves shuffled in a slow-witted dance around Hiei's still figure.

But it was unbearable. Life like this. To think, Thorn had taken her own life of her own free will. She had steeled herself to life, to the possible sorrow that she would feel. From his sorrow that he did feel, that he felt at every hint of Thorn that lurked in Rose's dark eyes and expressions.

But Hiei was no fool. He knew his own heart. He knew that if he was forced to hunt her as he once had, he would crumble. He would never be able to hold her as he did that one night ever again. She would be the enemy, and he would be able to embrace her only if she was unable to walk. It would no longer be a hunt for their amusement. Koenma would grow tired of her power, of her teasing, and would eventually find a way to turn the tables on her. He would discover a way to take her down. Even if it meant her own life. Anything to keep that fiend, the Black Blaze, from terrorizing the world. This would have indeed happened, merely for that damned sword. The damned sword that held more power away from her that it did combined with her body, where she at least held some say over his proceedings.

And Hiei, he knew he would have no choice but to aid the detectives in this task. To be a part of the destruction of the one he held as dear to his heart as his sister, Yukina.

Hiei's expression shifted slightly, upset with anger. He wanted someone, anyone, to blame for what had happened to Thorn. Someone to seek his revenge on for forcing her into her own suicide, so that he might feel better. So that with their death she would come back to life. He wanted someone to kill for convincing her give Rose back her body, for leaving in general, for him caring for her, for everything that made him hurt this way, with an ache that touched his core, caressing it at times, and clawing it during others.

But there was no one to blame. Absolutely no one.

……………………………….................................

Kurama walked into the other room, allowing Rose to come to her own conclusions as to why Hiei had left. The youkai, he knew, was in great pain. But this pain was not the physical pain, or the pain of the mind, but that of the soul, the heart. He knew that Hiei had ways of dealing with his emotions, especially the ones he found unpleasant. His favorite tactic was rage, the kistune knew. He would return with time, after he had fully relieved the hurt from his heart, via the blade of his katana. It would just take some time was all.

Rose sat on the couch, her eyes glassy as she stared absent-mindedly at the floor. One leg lay crossed over the other, as where her arms, the upraised foot tapping at the air in thought.

Alright, so the quiet Hiei was flustered, so what? Why did it effect her so much? The tingle in the back of her mind spoke of grief and discomfort at his very apparent displeasure toward her reaction to the news they had presented her with. She couldn't shake the feeling of worry nagging at her.

Kurama, too, had distanced himself from her to find company in the other room. It aggravated her that she did not have any idea as to what they were feeling.

Rose herself was very perceptive of human emotions. Was it because they were demons that she had trouble picking up their feelings? But emotions burned in their eyes just as they did in the eyes of ningens. Hiei's scarlet eyes had clearly been disrupted from their normal blankness, however, with his shaded eyes and lack of good view, it had been difficult to see exactly what shimmer lay in the depths of those orbs. Judging by Kurama's grim expression at his partners sudden departure, it seemed that Rose was left out on some large piece of this puzzle that would help determine the picture it created. The eyes of the kitsune were also hard, willing to be unfeeling against a, no doubt, barrage of emotions.

Rose was not the type of person to pry into the business of others. Their lives, of the current time or of a past time, were of no concern of hers. But this, no, this felt as though it was caused by her, and she'd be damned if she let that feeling fester without trying to sooth it in some way. Mostly with the question of WHY. She felt as though she was bound to these demons with a chain that was invisible to the naked, untrained eye as hers were, that was hidden beneath the vast stretch of webbing that was her life.

…………………….

She had embraced his soul, plunged into the frozen moat he had built about it to discourage anyone who wanted to see its true form. She had somehow broken through the icy coating he had made as further protection, and in doing this had done what no one else had ever done. No one had ever even dared to pick lightly at the surface, even though they knew the treasure lay beneath those icy waters. She ignored the freezing nature of the water and swam closer to his soul with every brush of a hand, every word that tumbled from her warm lips. Upon finding his core, untouched for so long as to be cold to the touch, she embraced it, warming it with her own spirit. It had made Hiei feel understood with such brilliance his head wheeled from it.

It is said that the revealing of one's soul, their very essence, makes them feel vulnerable, but this woman had never done that. She had made him feel whole, as though the wounds on his scarred past didn't exist with a healing hand that could not make their ache disappear, but subside in the least. Her hands were not just for her healing, however. They were rough in texture, but soft in touch. They pushed him to his limits, in body as well as in soul. It made him feel that he had met his match at long last, someone with whom he was equal in strength and weakness. To see someone as powerful as she as an equal made him feel as though his strength was boundless. She had poured strength into his being with her voice, her hands. Even after she had left him, through the pain of his loss, he still felt the strength she had nurtured within him surge through his blood during battle.

Hiei closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the rough bark of the tree he was currently sitting in. He had lost her, had lost Thorn. He had let her go, even when he could have stopped her. But he knew she would have objected to his intervention. She had never intended to bring him harm, although he had no doubts that she realized that she would in leaving, and he knew that. But, still, it had occurred. It had still happened, even though it could have been prevented. The pain could have been prevented. And he had let it happen.

Hiei sighed, taking in the rapt freshness of the end of spring that still struggled to keep its hold on the Earth as summer slowly pushed it away. A breeze that promised warm nights ruffled his hair with gentle, teasing fingers, bringing with it the soothing scent of Earth on its gentle body. It helped to calm him considerably, however, he knew to fully rid himself of this turmoil and confusion, physical activity was sure to banish it.

A few hours after entering the forest, Hiei stood up, unsheathed his katana, and began to relieve his stress.

…………………………..

With an exasperated sigh, Rose got up from the couch. It was four in the afternoon, and she hadn't moved in hours, not since Kurama had announced lunch. Her body was stiff and grumbled in loathing at being moved so suddenly after such a long period of frozen waiting. She ignored these unimportant protests with the same silence that had sucked away her words all day.

Kurama looked up, surprised and curious, but clearly not showing it. The girl hadn't said a word since that morning after Hiei had left. Her silence seemed odd, although a clearly practiced thing in her life. She had not spoken to him once in the time he had known her at her school in Tanglewood, when silence seemed to overshadow and engulf her back then, when now it was merely a patient companion at her side. The only real time she had spoken out was during their abduction, where anger seemed to fuel her voice into something a bit more lubricated. But now she spoke very plainly, bluntly, and at times seemed almost surprised at their expectance of her blatant use of expression filled words.

He looked at her now with more observation in his eyes. This girl was certainly less shallow than they gave her credit for. Although, at this moment, he didn't doubt that the feeling was mutual.

Rose leapt effortlessly up the stairs. She was curiously tired of the silence, the emptiness. It nagged at her now as it used to do after she had woken up. Before, there were always voices. There were always people, she knew. After, there had been people, and always voices, even if they had been ones of fear or disgust. But she grew used to it. The feeling that some part of her was missing. An important part. She never had been able to shrug it off, to just let it slide. Now, more than ever, she felt it, and could not ignore it as she had before. The void pierced her with a pang of guilt. And it was so odd. People never forgave her for however it was she had acted, never gave her a second chance, and she never felt guilty when others were hurt. She was hurt too. No one ever tried to help her.

Rose opened the door to Kurama's room roughly, but with control. She couldn't release the thought of what had happened that morning.

'What the hell is wrong with me?!' she asked herself, kneeling down to burrow through her backpack. 'What the hell is wrong with them?! What did I do to make them act like this around me? I didn't die, and I don't remember anything! I can't help them, so why don't they just let me go the hell home?!?!'

She retrieved a large text book from the depths of the large back, fishing out a binder as well. She put them in her arm, still fuming silently as she made her way back down the stairs. For the past odd number of hours, all she had done was think about the past few days, and all it had proven to do was upset her. She was angry at herself for being so foolish as to except the deal she had made with Kurama when she could easily escape in just a few short days.

But, part of her reasoned calmly, they would just hunt her down again. And who knew what mood that would put them in? It might just encourage them to take her to their boss. Upsetting him might mean her life.

And then there was that little, annoying voice in the back of her mind that constantly poked and prodded at her, whispering of its curiosity as to what else lay on the tape. The more she thought about it, the more she wanted to see what else was on it. She knew it held more answers than she held questions to.

Rose sighed and walked from the room, supplies in her arms. She walked back down the stairs and resumed her seat on the sofa, opening up the book and struggling to concentrate on her homework, of which would have been due the next day, had her life been a normal one. But it just drilled into her brain her current predicament. She couldn't take this anymore, she just wanted to go home. This thought proceeded to manifest itself into something more. Perhaps that portal in the city was still open? Maybe she could slip through that. Her mind honed on the thought. It would be worth a try. Even if it wasn't open, she thought, they might open another to look for her back at her home. It could work, as long as she kept from sight until that time.

She slammed her book shut with a clap and threw it carelessly beside her. Concentrating on homework wasn't happening.

………………………………...........

The Minamino's front door opened quietly at nearly seven that night, startling the girl on the couch from her reverie. The click of the handle was hardly distinguishable, but a roar in the silence that proceeded it. Rose looked up to watch Hiei walk through the door. He hesitated when he saw her there and glanced at Kurama's blank face, but proceeded onward, closing the door uncomfortably.

His thick black hair was wet, dampening the dark blue that normally reflected off it into a deep violet hue, and it was apparent from his scent that he had taken a long swim to wash away his troubles.

The youkai did not turn to look at them again as he took a seat on one of the chairs in the room, pulling his legs beneath him and resting his katana on his shoulder absent-mindedly.

Rose quickly turned her gaze away from him, fists clenching and her shoulders shaking. She could feel a slight sweat break out along her brow. She had never noticed his sword before this. Was Koenma's new orders to kill her? She bit her lip and studied the whiteness of her knuckles, her legs twitching, ready to flee.

Streaming sunlight trickled through the low-set windows of the room, informing without words that the sun was beginning to set. The sky was beginning to change its daylight colors, merging the bright blue of day to a purplish pink of sunset. Streamers of orange burned over the tops of cotton clouds and glared at the darkness beginning to settle about the city.

The house was quiet, but not to the extent that it was before. It would have even been peaceful, three breaths filling the air, if not for one that was hoarser than the other, calm breaths. Rose shifted and swallowed thickly, taking a deep breath to calm her nerves. Her fretful frown did not help her respiration. But it was a step up from the two auras that once filled the house formerly.

Hiei was set in a cloud of isolation and morbid thought, at least as far as Rose could decipher. But perhaps it was just the guilt of what he would have to do. But this was not shown in his blank expression, which gave no hint to his thoughts. She looked away, shuddering slightly at the thought.

Kurama's sharp nose twitched slightly. Chuckling silently to himself as what he speculated was Rose's thoughts, yet worried about its consequences as well, he stood from his seat.

Hiei glanced at him as the kitsune came over to him, bending to speak in his ear.

"She's afraid you're going to kill her. Give me the sword and I'll take care of it," Kurama informed him. Hiei was startled by his words, and spared a glance toward the girl on the couch to see her flinch slightly as she saw him look over at her. Knowing that the red head was right, he reluctantly gave him his katana. Kurama took it and straightened, leaving the room with it in tow.

Rose watched her captor suspiciously, her heart rate accelerating slightly as he walked behind the couch to go up the stairs. Hiei watched her curiously, satisfied when she took a breath of relief. When Kurama returned a few moments later, swordless, the girl relaxed, her breath and heart-rate steadying. Kurama looked to Hiei, who jerked his head slightly in understanding.

This girl was flightier than a bird. One wrong move like that and they would loose their trust in her completely.

……………………………….....................

Later that night, Rose and Hiei took their leisure in the sitting room. Darkness spun a thick web about their shoulders, damming the space between them with a peaceful wall of silence. Shadows hugged the ridges of their figures, slithering over clothing and other crevices. The sun had long set, and only one soft light was on in the corner of the room.

The silence was filtered away after reigning for nearly a hour, Rose's soft voice parting it like a hand does sand.

"What did I do?" the girl asked abruptly, startling the youkai. He looked up from his glazed sight on the floor at her feet quickly, his eyes narrowing in suspicion. She did not turn to look at him, but he knew she could sense his eyes on her face, studying it in order to decipher what she meant by the question.

"What are you talking about?" he asked gruffly.

"My other self. Thorn. Sh- I hurt you, didn't I?" she asked, her voice still holding the soothing tone it had before, as though to caress a wound who's depth she could not discover.

"I don't know what you're talking about," he said, turning his head to study the city lights, blurred by the curtains over the windows. His stomach churned slightly and he could almost taste the Pain seeping into its place.

"Listen, something happened, I know it did. I hurt you somehow. You don't seem angry at me and out for revenge like someone would be if I had hurt their pride. And you don't seem like you're grief-stricken and vengeful for a life of a loved one I might have taken from you. You seem almost pained, like you were dealt a blow to your heart, not to your body," she said softly. Her head was hanging slightly when Hiei glanced at her again, obscuring her eyes with pits of black shadow. He glared at her, scowling, struggling to contain his emotions. She had killed someone. She had killed Thorn. If it wasn't for this wisp of a human girl, Thorn would still be here. It stung, and the thought it led to stung even more. He had this girl to thank for Thorn in the first place.

He opened his mouth to deny her words, to protest in some, in any way, but his throat constricted and closed, invisible hands clamping it shut.

"Please, Hiei, tell me." He swallowed in hopes of loosening the knot in his throat. "I did something, I know it. I just want to know what it was. I want to try to fix it."

"Really Rose, you shouldn't pry into the affairs of others. Thorn wasn't nearly so inconsiderate." The almost mocking, almost spiteful words made the girl turn her head. Hiei looked up as well, watching as the kitsune strode down the stairs with such confidence, an almost smug look in his eyes. His hands worked out small tangles in his water-darkened hair. As the two had spoken, they did not notice the water above them crease to run.

"That's the last time I leave you two alone, Hiei," he said in a lofty tone, humor hinting subtly in the back of it. "You shouldn't let her go around thinking such an absurd thing."

"Hn," Hiei grunted, giving his shoulder blades a slight roll. "Yeah." He forced a smirk to his features, although it was a weak, awkward one. Baffled, the American looked from one to the other, glaring at them without intensity, searching for the meaning she could sense they kept hidden from her in their words. Finally, she got up from her seat with a scowl, pushing past Kurama roughly and trotting lightly up the stairs, an air of proud distain engulfing her.

Hiei let out his breath slowly and considerately. He glanced up at Kurama, who turned back to him after watching Rose take her leave. The youkai gave a brief nod of thanks, shifting slightly on his seat, loosening his shoulders and back from their tense form they held formerly.

Kurama's eyes scanned over his partner softly as thoughts tumbled gently and sorrowfully in his mind.

'I guess some things don't change,' the kitsune thought. 'He's still met his match when it comes to a quick tongue, and she still manages to leave him without a retort. A rare feat. A shame I could not find amusement in it as I once did.'

Hiei's eyes strayed back toward the curtain, through which bobbed headlights from a passing car. Damn. She was good. Too good. She had seen through him as though he wore his emotions on his sleeve. No, she had sensed them. He was letting them seep too much into himself and the way he acted. There was no possible way he was that transparent.

Was he?

No, she was just assuming. But… she had been correct. Terrifyingly correct.

….……………….….…....................................................

Authoress' Note: alright, I know, no update for a while. I've been grounded since the first report card, which said I was failing a class and close to failing a second. then my progress report came out and said I was failing two classes, so computer has been limited to 'school work'. :P don't tell mom, but she's out and I'm breaking rules. . Anyway, this chapter I can't reply to reviews, but I hope to be able to do that at school tomorrow in SH. So please be patient! Thank you for sticking through this! I'll try to sneak on more often :P

Also note that Hiei's torment wont last forever. I think this is the last chapter of it :P. sorry to all of you who adored it, but even I think its getting a little old . But, I haven't edited my story in a spell, so there might be one chapter left! Hang in there!

The Password:

This is just a note for all of you who think you know the password right now. I would just like to say that I will not make ANY comments in yer review replies about it. Not only would, if you are correct, it spoil it for others, but I do not wish to make you think that you are right when you are wrong, or vice versa. I've gotten comments in the past about the password as well, and that's dandy, but please just know that if you think its blatantly obvious that the password is 'Blah Blah BLAH!' please keep it out of reviews. If you would, however, like to send me an e-mail about it with questions, I would be happy to see what I can do as an author without spoiling my story. In truth, I'm going to stop giving any and all hints as to what might occur in my stories out of contexted. I think it really might be spoiling the over-all story. But I do thank you ALL for the great reviews!

Reviews are like money, only they can't buy me a Sesshoumaru-sama plushie vv