I'll Miss This One This Year

Summer

"And it was much easier said than done," Emma remarked to her two eager listeners.

Mary Margaret and Ruby had both become more and more engrossed in Emma's tale as it went on. Ruby was getting more details the second time around than she had gotten the first, drawing her in and keeping her hooked. At first, Emma had been a little unsure whether to go into her and Killian's discovery of their similar upbringings, but she ultimately decided to go for it. Mary Margaret and Ruby were her two best friends and they both knew about the place she had come from. Whilst neither of them could truly understand it in the same way that Killian could, they were always there for her if she needed to talk through anything.

"It turns out that keeping in contact over the phone is very difficult when someone spends more than half their time in the middle of the ocean," Emma commented, trying her best not to sound bitter.

The situation with Killian was one where she had forced herself to resign to the recognition that it was never going to work out. She had accepted the fact and filed it away under what could have been. It was only as she was recalling the events to her friends that she found herself remembering how much she had wanted it to happen for them. The reasons why it had seemed like things could actually work out between them were all flooding back.

To start with, he had been so good with that young boy out on the slopes when they first met, bar the momentarily lapse in concentration which had ultimately resulted in them meeting. Whilst a four-year-old was a very different thing to a ten-year-old, it was important to Emma that, were she to date someone, they would be good with Henry. Killian had been a little surprised at Henry's first arrival, which was to be expected, but it certainly hadn't put him off.

It was Killian's own experience with the system which had sealed the deal for Emma and his brief, yet clear, statement making his devotion to his brother known helped settle her anxiety around her abandonment issues. He would understand. He would be able to see where her worries were coming from.

Damn fate just had to dangle a carrot in front of her nose and then chuck it into the depths of the ocean, didn't it?

"Did he tell you the story behind the prosthetic?" Ruby questioned one of the parts of the story which Emma had left out of her shorter tale a few months back.

"Not the story behind it, no. And it's not the easiest thing to bring up in conversation so I never asked," Emma answered.

"So, was that really the last you heard from him? The convention in Spring?" Mary Margaret asked.

"How out of the loop are you?" Ruby exploded before Emma had a chance to respond. "I know you have a toddler keeping you busy but I thought you knew what happened in August! You and David were enlisted to look after Henry, remember?"

"Wait!" Mary Margaret gasped, her eyes going wide as she put the pieces together. "That cruise you were supposed to be going on. That was him?"

"Yeah," Emma admitted with a nod. "After some radio silence, I finally heard from him…"

It was late.

Emma was tired, stifling yawns constantly, but she had gotten stuck on the night shift as a favor to Graham and found herself shifting through a pile of paperwork. She wasn't sure when it had managed to get so backlogged but she was slowly working towards getting on top of it.

The sound of her phone ringing was a welcomed distraction. Curiosity hit her instantly. It was gone midnight. Who would be calling at such an hour? She grabbed her phone from the desk, turning it over in her hand so she could see the caller ID.

Killian.

Well, that brightened up her night shift!

It had been a month since they'd last properly spoken. He'd gone off gallivanting around the world, captaining a cruise ship once again, living the life. It was an action which did not aid their attempts to find time for a first date, and it was also one which always led to her questioning whether they should even keep trying. Would dating really work when their conflicting schedules never lined up with one another? Were they both wasting time with their insistence that they would eventually make that date work? The effort going in to one date was ridiculous. Looking long-term, a serious relationship wouldn't work if nothing changed.

And yet, every single time that phone call came, all those doubts would be shoved to the back of Emma's mind. She became like a teenager with a first crush all over again, rushing to answer the call. Of course, she would slow her actions down, determined not to let him know how much his calls impacted upon her.

"You're lucky I'm working nights," Emma greeted him when she answered the phone, knowing how grumpy she would have been had his call woken her at nearing one in the morning.

"Ah, bloody time zones," Killian recognized his mistake. "Guess where I am."

Emma groaned, eyeing the stack of paperwork in front of her, "Not the time to be rubbing it in."

"Don't worry, Swan, it's nowhere you desperately want to go," Killian assured her.

"Trust me, anywhere is better than here. Do you want to swap wherever to are in the world for a desk full of paperwork?" Emma offered.

"Thanks for the gracious offer, love, but I'll stick with Alaska," Killian replied, not needing to take much time to consider the offer. "Listen, I've got the next two weeks off-"

"We've already been over those two weeks, Killian," Emma sighed, rubbing her hand over her forehead as she recalled their previous conversation which resulted in them failing to set a date during that time. "It just doesn't work out, as usual. I've got Henry's Star Wars convention and then there's little Leo's birthday, and you've already arranged to see your brother for a couple of days, and you've got Roland's birthday-"

"Right, I know, love, I do remember," Killian cut her off. "I was actually going to say I've got the next two weeks off then I'm captaining a cruise to Hawaii."

Now, he really was rubbing it in.

Hawaii was definitely on her list of places that she wanted to go. Top of her list, in fact. And Killian knew that. They had both taken part in a huge discussion about dream vacation destinations over text, sharing their lists with one another. Killian's, having travelled far and wide already, was much shorter than hers, but hers had certainly included Hawaii.

"I see, you have called to rub it in," Emma called him out, perhaps a bit too bluntly but it was late, and she was tired.

"On the contrary, I've called to offer you two all-expenses paid tickets for you and a friend," Killian returned.

Emma couldn't quite believe what she was hearing.

"It's a two-week cruise, Hawaii being the sole destination and so it gives you a good few days to explore the island," Killian continued. "The only catch is that it leaves from California, and I know you're somewhere on the east coast, so there will be the expense of travelling to that point if you're willing to come?"

"Of course, I'd love to!" Emma told him. "But I have to check logistics with work and Henry and everything else. Could I get back to you on that?"

"Of course. I wasn't expecting an answer right away. I'm aware it's rather last minute and I completely understand that you can't just drop everything and fly across the country with two weeks' notice," Killian told her.

Emma noticed that he seemed to be preparing himself for a 'no'.

She didn't blame him. It wasn't like their attempts to set up meetings ever worked out.

"All expenses paid for?" Mary Margaret interrupted Emma's story to call out an earlier detail. "You never mentioned that part when you told me you were going on a cruise."

"Because I knew it would lead to a ton of questions," Emma admitted.

"I do have a lot of questions!" Mary Margaret confessed. "How did he get those all expense paid tickets? Is it normal for a Captain to be given a set of those? Or was he covering up that he'd paid for them? Oooh, maybe they were left over from a competition?"

"I really don't know," Emma shrugged in response to her theories. She hadn't gotten the chance to ask him. "I doubt he would have paid for them though."

She really hoped he hadn't, and not just because it would have been well overpriced for a first date.

Emma glanced over at Ruby who was at the counter, buying them all another drink each.

"The only reason Ruby knew about Killian though is because she was coming on the cruise," Emma explained to Mary Margaret.

She was worried that the other woman may think she had been left out from the gossip, not that any of them, except probably Ruby, were that big on gossip. Mary Margaret was the one who introduced the two of them to each other and it made Emma even more aware that she should never be the one who felt left out.

"I thought I'd ought to give her a head's up that I knew the Captain personally," Emma clarified further. "The last thing I wanted was her freaking out on me right in front of him."

"Don't worry about it," Mary Margaret insisted with a friendly smile. "I get it."

Ruby returned at that point with the three mugs of fresh, steaming hot chocolate.

"So," Ruby said as she sat back down in the booth, glancing between Mary Margaret and Emma, "are we all caught up?"

"Pretty much," Emma said with a nod, "since you both know what happened with the cruise…"

A huge smile spread across Emma's face as she and Ruby settled into their seats by their gate to wait for the announcement that boarding was open. The airport was packed, filled with family's heading out on their summer vacations, and security had taken forever, but Emma didn't care. They were at the gate – the correct one - they'd both checked four times, terrified they'd try to get on the wrong plane, missing their actual plane in the process. They were one step closer to the cruise.

Emma couldn't believe it.

It was actually happening!

The two weeks had flown by. Emma had set to work right away, the morning after receiving the phone call from Killian. She had been determined to get it to work. She cleared two weeks vacation time with Graham. She asked Ruby if she wanted the second ticket and she had leapt at the chance, saying yes without hesitation, adamant she would get the time off work with ease.

Of course, as always, it wasn't totally plain sailing. It was Henry which proved a little more difficult. She and Neal alternated weeks anyway so it was only the first week which she had to account for. She had thought it would be an easy fix and that Neal would jump at the chance to have his son for an extra week. She had forgotten that things were never that easy with Neal. It turned out he had his own vacation booked for that week with his girlfriend, Tamara. Luckily for Emma, Mary Margaret and David had swooped in to save the day, more than willing to have Henry for the week.

For once, everything was looking up.

Beside her, Ruby gasped loudly, "Oh no!"

Emma glanced over to her, ready to ask her what was wrong. Ruby had disappeared. The chair next to Emma was empty. Emma frowned, glancing around the rest of the small waiting section by their gate. Ruby was nowhere to be seen.

Something tapped her foot.

Emma looked down immediately to find Ruby lying on the floor behind their carry-on cases.

"What are you doing?" Emma asked, really struggling to believe what she was seeing.

Was she going crazy? Were her eyes lying to her? Was the whole thing just a dream?

"Look at the guy sat on the end of the rows of chairs by the windows," Ruby hissed at her, keeping her voice low despite the loud buzz of the airport.

Emma had barely heard her and raised an eyebrow at the insanity unfolding before her but went on to follow Ruby's directions to quell her own curiosity. Anything to try and understand what the hell was going on.

The man in question, sat looking over his ticket, was rather unassuming. Emma wasn't sure what she had been expecting. He looked to be in his thirties and did look a little exhausted, bags visible under his blue eyes. She had no idea why his presence had prompted Ruby to resort to lying on the airport floor. Emma did have to admit, there was a familiarity about the man, like she had seen him somewhere before.

It took her a few moments to place him, and even then, she wasn't sure.

"Is that the new guy who moved to Storybrooke a few months back?" Emma asked Ruby, struggling to find his name. She clicked her fingers when it finally came to her, "Liam!"

Ruby was glaring up at her like she had missed the obvious, "You mean my boss?"

"Huh, oh yeah," Emma realised, now that Ruby had reminded her, that Liam had taken ownership of the pub that Ruby served at. "Hold on though… why are you hiding from your boss?"

"I told him I was down for the count with tonsillitis!" Ruby hissed back at her.

Emma burst out laughing. She didn't even try to hold it in. The situation was too much.

"What if you're sat next to him?" Emma exclaimed through her laughter.

"Don't even joke," Ruby muttered, not sharing the same amusement.

Emma was sure Ruby would find the funny side when she wasn't having to resort to lying on the airport floor to prevent her boss catching her pulling a sickie. Once they were poolside, on the ship, they'd both be laughing about it whilst sipping martinis.

With that thought, another possibility crossed Emma's mind and she gasped, "Imagine if he's on the same cruise!"

She laughed again, with Ruby sill not finding it funny. Ruby had moved on, paying little attention to her, and busied herself with a puzzle book as she lay there.

Emma eventually stopped laughing when her phone started ringing. Almost everyone that she knew were aware that she would be moments away from getting on a plane. She had not been expecting anyone to try to call. She dug her phone out of her bag, glancing at the caller ID to see David's name.

She lifted the phone to her ear and answered, "Hello?"

"Emma, oh good, you're not on the plane yet," David sounded heavily relieved at that piece of news. "We've all been trying to contact you."

There was a hesitation in his voice which made it sound like he really did not want to be having the conversation. When combined with the obvious worry she picked up in his tone, Emma knew that something was wrong. She was hit by a wave of dread which settled into the pit of her stomach.

"What's wrong?" Emma asked immediately.

"So… err," David stumbled, seemingly struggling to find the right words.

"Please, just tell me," Emma did her best not to snap but she really needed to know what it was so she knew what she could do about it.

"It's Henry. He went down with something after you left. And then went down fast," David came out with it. "It's not good, Emma. We're in the hospital with him. The doctors suspect pneumonia."

Emma let out a gasp of air. She's seen him briefly before leaving. She picked him up from Neal's that morning, allowing herself the chance to say goodbye in person, before she had dropped him at Mary Margaret and David's. He had been a little on the quiet side, but she hadn't suspected that he wasn't feeling well, and he certainly didn't say he was unwell.

Emma couldn't stay in the airport. She needed to get out of there. The thought of Henry in a hospital bed, fighting pneumonia without her made her feel sick.

"I'll be right there," Emma told him.

She hung up the phone and jumped to her feet, grabbing her carry-on case.

"Hey!" Ruby protested, hurrying to shift her position to hide behind her single remaining case.

"He's not looking," Emma shot at her a little bluntly. "I'm not going on that plane. Henry's in hospital. I have to get back."

"Oh no!" Ruby gasped in horror, jumping to her feet right away. "I'm coming with you."

Five days passed since the airport and Emma spent nearly every moment of those days in the hospital, sat in the chair beside Henry's bed. He wasn't in a good way; it had really taken it out of him, and she felt utterly useless. There was nothing she could do to help him.

He was sleeping. He looked more peaceful when he was sleeping and so Emma was just content to watch him.

She, meanwhile, was far from peaceful. She was raging. She had finally gotten in touch with Neal, after five days' worth of attempts, and it was a phone call which had not gone well. It had ended with her hanging up on him and fighting against the urge to throw her own phone against the hospital wall.

Her phone rang and she snatched it up, expecting to see Neal calling her back. Instead, the caller ID stated Killian's name.

"I have to warn you, I am in a horrendous mood," Emma warned him the moment she answered the call. The last thing she wanted to do was scare him off if she accidentally snapped at him.

"Does this have something to do with the reason for you missing the cruise?" Killian asked gently.

"Oh crap," Emma muttered to herself, running a hand over her tired eyes. "I forgot to call and let you know. Henry's got pneumonia. It's bad. We're in the hospital."

"Poor boy," Killian commented. "I wish the lad a speedy recovery."

Emma scoffed.

"That wasn't at you!" Emma hurriedly clarified when she realised the scoff had escaped her lips. "Thank you. It's just in those few words you've expressed more concern than his own father."

There was a moment's silence from the other end of the line, then, "I'm here if you need to rant, love."

Emma didn't need offering twice; not in the mood she was in.

"Well, to start with, he didn't even bother to tell me that Henry had been ill the last few days that he was with him! He told me he thought he was better when I picked him up, but you still would have thought he'd have filled me in!" The words hurtled out of Emma's mouth. "I've been trying to get in contact with him for days! He finally answered today and he hardly seemed bothered. Yeah, your son's lying in a hospital bed but don't rush back from your vacation. Enjoy the beach! I'm sure you'll find it really easy to relax with this new information!"

"Better?" Killian asked after a moment of silence.

"Lots," Emma answered with a satisfied nod.

And she was. It felt good to get it all off her chest, preventing her from bottling it up.

"Thanks," Emma added.

"You're most welcome, Emma," Killian replied. "And if you need anything at all… well, I'm stuck in Hawaii but-"

Emma let out the smallest laugh, "Oh, don't rub it in."

"You know, I ought to thank you, love," Killian suddenly stated.

It came out of nowhere and Emma wasn't exactly sure what she had done to deserve the appreciation.

"What for? All I've done is rant at you," she pointed out.

"Aye. True, true. You're a horrible person," his tone was dripping with sarcasm, "I don't know why I'm so insistent on getting this date with you."

Emma let out a small laugh.

"But, seriously, I told my brother about you," Killian guided himself back on track, though Emma wasn't sure what that snippet of news had to do with thanking her.

"You did?" Emma questioned, doing her best to cover up her surprise at that statement.

"Well, he's on the cruise with me, and you were going to be here," Killian explained, "so I thought I'd get him up to speed but then, of course, for entirely understandable reasons, you were a no show. I've had him teasing me about being stood up for the last five days. I assured him there would be a reasonable explanation, but he was having none of it. So, I placed a wager and I'll be getting him to pay up later tonight."

"I really should have called sooner," Emma stated apologetically.

"You were busy," Killian brushed away her apology. "Besides, now I can lord it over him for the next nine days!"

Emma let out another small laugh, "I'm sure he's going to love it."

"Most certainly," Killian agreed. "Listen, Emma, I going to have to go but if you need anything in the next few days, just give me a call. I'm afraid you'll have difficulty reaching me after that, when I'm back behind the wheel of the ship, but until then I'm here for you, should you need me. Talk soon."

The line went dead and Emma placed the phone back down, returning her full attention to the sleeping Henry who continued to look so peaceful, feeling a little more peaceful herself after that talk.

"That's the first time I've heard you laugh since you've been here, dear," one of the senior nurses on the ward spoke up. She sent Emma a friendly smile, "Whoever's on the other end of that line must be very special."

Emma didn't respond, she didn't have to, because the nurse didn't wait for one. She was off almost instantly, no doubt to go about her rounds on another ward. Her words, however, remained with Emma, lingering and ticking over constantly in her head.

'Must be very special.'

Emma thought about it.

Did she think Killian was special.

She supposed she did.

Man, and they'd yet to even have a first date.