"You were just complaining about Tex being an asshole, why are you so exited all of a sudden?" Church questions.
"Hey! I'm taking whatever victory's I can get." Kaede retorts.
"So, let me get this straight... you're telling me the guy that showed up here, scared the living shit out of us, shot at Caboose and beat the hell out of the reds wasn't a guy at all? That he was a chick? And on top of that, she was your ex-girlfriend." Tucker exclaims.
"In a nutshell, yes. Thats an excellent summary." Church agrees.
"I should have known... she didn't like me... girls never like me..." Caboose says.
"Hey! I like you." Kaede says.
"Oh yeah! And the other you liked me too!" Caboose exclaims.
"You mean Nyu?" Kaede asks.
"Excuse you." Caboose replies.
"Caboose, besides Kaede and Nyu, I don't think anyone likes you." Tucker says.
"I like me." Caboose meekly says.
"I don't think I've seen a girl THAT mean before." Tucker continues. "Are you sure she's a chick?"
"Girls can be mean. Trust me." Kaede growls, thinking of the girl who sold out her dog.
"I'm pretty sure I would know if she wasn't a girl." Church assures.
"If she's a girl, why is named Tex?" Tucker asks.
"Because she's from Texas." Church flatly states. "Trust me, it makes sense. And you can't blame her for being so aggressive. Its not entirely her fault to begin with."
"Right. You should blame God." Tucker states. "First he makes hangovers, and now, half woman, half sharks that won't even sleep with me. Thanks for nothing God!"
"Where did you pull "half shark" out of all that?" Kaede asks.
"She's half whatever vicious animal." Tucker states.
"Moving on, She got recruited into some kind of weird experimental program back during basic where they infused her armour with this really aggressive A.I." Church explains. "I'm not sure how it works, but all I know is it made her meaner and tougher than hell."
"So this A.I. thing controls her?" Kaede asks.
"Not really. More like it just nudges her to be a bitch." Church explains.
"So, underneath it all she's really just a sweet, down-home girl?" Tucker questions.
"Oh, Hell no. She's always been a rotten bitch, its just now she's a rotten bitch with cybernetic enhancements." Church answers.
"Wow. Sounds like you really won the lottery with that one. Good catch there buddy, she's a keeper." Tucker sarcastically comments.
"How did the two of you even get together? More importantly, how did you stay together as long as you did?" Kaede asks.
"Thats a long story." Church says.
"Long story as in long story, or none of my business?" Kaede asks.
"Both." Church answers. "So, Caboose? Following any of this whatsoever?"
"I think so..." Caboose answers. "That guy Tex is really a robot, and you're his boyfriend. So that makes you... a gay robot." Kaede bursts out laughing at the accusation. Even Tucker chuckles a little.
"Yeah... Thats right... I'm a gay robot..." Church deadpans. Kaede and Tucker's laughter fills the canyon. Once the two calm down, Church continues. "Okay guys, I have a great plan to rescue Tex."
"A plan? Oh, man, I hate plans. That means we're gonna have to do stuff. Can't we just have a strategy or a mission statement?" Tucker complains.
"You're almost as bad as Grif." Kaede comments.
"Who's Grif?" Tucker asks.
"Uh... no one!" Kaede assures.
"I just need you guys to run a distraction while I spring Tex." Church explains.
"Distraction? Heh, that sounds a lot like decoy." Caboose silently chuckles.
"The way I see it, the reds have no idea how many freelancers we have out here. So all I need from the two of you, is to run around in the middle of the canyon, wearing black armour, while I sneak in the back of the base." Church elaborates.
"Wait, two? What should I do?" Kaede asks.
"Do? You're not doing anything. You're staying here." Church says. "I'm not bringing a teenager into battle."
"I'm apart of this team too! Besides, I have my invisible arms to protect me." Kaede argues.
"I don't think invisible arms can block bullets." Tucker states.
"How about we test it!" Caboose suggests.
"Caboose, no one is shooting at Kaede." Church affirms.
"Your just looking for another team kill aren't you?" Tucker jokes.
"No! We all agree it was the tanks fault." Caboose says.
"And maybe the guy driving it." Kaede adds.
"Yes." Caboose agrees, not knowing she was referring to him.
"How about this, Kaede use that sniper rifle you got to keep an eye on the reds while we execute the plan." Church suggests. "Contact us on the radios if you see anything out of the ordinary."
"Yes sir!" Kaede says, giving a playful salute.
"Uh, you're missing one critical piece there, Church." Tucker brings up "Where are we gonna get two suits of black armour?" Church looks to the teleporter. "Oh fuckberries."
Kaede watched through the scope of the sniper rifle as Caboose and Tucker, now in black armour, approached the red base. It took awhile, but eventually a red soldier, either Sarge or the new guy, walks out of the base with Tex.
"It doesn't look like anyone's hurt, thankfully." Kaede says to herself as she watches on. "I wonder if thats Church possessing Sagre over there. Can he possess people?" The thought seemed cool but scary in a way.
She is interrupted from her thoughts as a large bang rings out, and Sarge drops to the ground leaving the ghost Church in his place.
"No! Sarge!" She cries out. Luckily everyone is too far away to hear her. Looking back to the blues, she spies one of the black armoured men holding a sniper rifle. They shot him.
"They'll take your friends one by one. End them before they put an end to your happy life."
It had to have been Caboose. Tucker would never end up with a sniper rifle somehow, so it had to be him.
"First Church, now Sarge. Who is next? It could be you."
Kaede thinks on that.
"Kill him before he can kill you."
Wait, who was saying these things?
"Who's there!" Kaede calls out. No response. "You've talked to me twice! Tell me! Who are you!" The voice does not responds. 'I can't be ear hallucinating.' Kaede thinks. Was ear hallucination even possible? 'I would never think those things so who's talking to me? Is anyone else hearing it?' She continues to think.
Soon, the blues came back with Tex, she went up to be alone with Church while Kaede helped clean off Tucker and Cabooses armour. It was pretty easy with the careful use of her invisible hands.
"Damn, those things are quite handy. Why don't you use them more?" Tucker asks.
"I do. Just not on any of you guys." Kaede answers.
"Why not?" Tucker asks.
"I've tested them out, and they can cut through your guys armour like a knife through butter." Kaede explains. "We wouldn't want an accident to happen, so I specifically try not to use them on you guys."
"If theres an accident, why not just say sorry?" Caboose asks.
"Sorry, what? Its kinda hard to hear you over the sound of your constant team killing." Tucker retorts.
"That should be answer enough." Kaede agrees. Soon Tex and Church join them and argue about favours.
"Fine. I'll stay here as long as it takes to help you guys win this thing. As soon as I have, I'm outta here. What do you need me to do?" Tex finally relents.
"I have no idea. If you knew how to fix a tank, I would have you do that." Tucker says.
"Okay." Tex simply says.
"You know how to fix Shelia? ...I love you." Caboose responds.
"Wait, fix the tank with the broken A.I.?" Kaede questions. "Am I the only who sees the problem with this?"
"Whatever your problem, it was probably user error." Tex replies. "Thats probably how it broke in the first place." She mutters the last part so no one can hear her.
"I have a bad feeling about this." Kaede also mutters to herself.