The red and blue zealots pop'd back up, ran into their bases, and ran out shooting at each other again. Eventually...
"Look! Up there!" A red cries.
"Where?" Another red asks.
"Theres a blue devil with that nice looking girl!" The first red explains.
"Oh man, she must be a hostage." The second red realizes.
"Oh man. Rescue mission update!" a third exclaims. "We gotta help her."
The blues come to the same conclusion seeing as Sarge is also with them, and, along with the reds, charge at the three, shooting, screaming, and trash talking.
"Damn it. We've been spotted!" Sarge exclaims. "Defensive positions!"
"Whats a defensive?" Caboose asks.
"He means make sure they don't kill us." Kaede answers, refering to the zealots.
"Caboose take one side, I'll take the other." Sarge says.
"If we stay together, I can use my hands to stop their bullets." Kaede adds.
"Excellent plan! Glad I thought of it." Sarge says.
"Most of it." Kaede corrects. With that, she extends her invisible arms around the two to form a shield. Meanwhile, Sarge and Caboose shoot at the incoming zealots. Maintaining the shield was harder than she thought. Every time Sarge or Caboose fired, she had to make sure her arms were out of the way or she would end up stopping their bullets. Additionally, she had to constantly move her arms to stop bullets from reaching them. With four arms, she could easily from a shield around herself, however with two arms per person, they didn't cover as much. Luckily, they were freakishly fast.
"Caboose, Caboose, keep them from us!" Sarge exclaims. "Get that one! And that one! No, no the one with the limp, get em!"
"Worry about your own side!" Kaede exclaims.
"Then worry about yours." Sarge shoots back.
"I am! I'm worrying about both sides here!" Kaede exclaims.
"Yes, I heard you sergeant." Caboose says.
"I didn't say anything, numbnuts." Sarge says as he shoots down the last zealot.
"There. Your body count is higher than O'mallys." Kaede says.
"Heh. Yeah, your right." Sarge says proudly before turning serious. "We have to break this never ending cycle of attack and retaliation, either by A) convincing the two sides to live in peace, or B) by getting ourselves completely involved, and kicking some serious ass! I vote B."
"I have a plan, but we will have to move quickly." Caboose says before having the two huddle around him. "Do you think that will work?"
"Thats your plan? All you said was "whisper whisper whisper."." Sarge explains.
"I know. I just wanted to be the one with the plan for once." Caboose explains.
"Then come up with an actual plan! This is life and death and we don't have time for your usual comedy routine." Kaede exclaims.
"Comedy routine?" Caboose questions. "I don't understand."
"Kaede's right. Enough of the jibber jabber. I have an idea." Sarge says. "Those guys are so obsessed with their flags. So we take them while they're still out cold. Then, we bribe them with their flags to help us out."
"Good idea!" Kaede agrees. "We better make it quick before they wake up." Sarge runs to the blue base to get their flag, while Kaede and Caboose head to red base to get their flag. As soon as they have both flags, they go back down to their high ground and wait for the sound of Revelee to play. Once it does, all the fallen soldiers are revived and run back into their base. "How do you think they do that?" Kaede asks. "Come back to the dead, I mean. Is there some kinda advanced technology thats only used for this area that brings people back?"
"I dunno. Simmons would be better at this than I am." Sarge says. "Then again, I can kill Caboose and we can see if he comes back. If he does, that means we're immortal here! If not, theres one less blue in the universe. Its a win-win." Kaede shoots him a disapproving look.
"That plan sounds neat. Lets do it." Caboose agress.
"Right... you still... are part blue." Sarge ignores Caboose.
"Sarge did you-" Kaede starts.
"Not yet... I'll let you know how I feel when we get out of this." Sarge explains.
"Okay." Kaede weakly says.
Meanwhile, she could hear the red soldiers yelling about protecting their house until they finally noticed their flag was gone. After awhile, both blue and red army's charged at each other, but they were lacking their usual fire.
"Oh blue team! Look what I have!" Sarge calls, waving around their flag.
"Oh blue team! Look what, wait I messed up my line." Caboose says.
"Oh red team! Look what he has!" Kaede saves.
"They have our flag!" A red calls out.
"No they don't, they have our flag." A blue corrects.
"Listen you morons, you're gonna have to work for us now." Sarge explains.
"Whats in it for us?" A red asks.
"Your all important flags!" Kaede answers. "What makes it "all important" anyway? Is it part of a religion or something."
"Hey! Do not disrespect the flag!" A blue yells.
"The flags will smite you should you speak ill of them." A red informs.
"Oh lord, fire divine, have mercy. This nonbeliever does not speak for us." A blue chants.
"I was joking but, alright." Kaede mutters to herself.
"So if you want your flags back as to not disappoint your gods, you'll help us." Sarge says. "Then you can go back to senselessly killing yourselves."
"Deal. Ha-sucker." A red cries out.
"Wait, why don't we just kill you guys and take the flags back?" A blue asks. Sarge shoots with a sniper rifle Kaede gave him.
"Thats why... for starters anyway." Kaede taunts.
"Oh, you got owned. I saw it, fucking owned." A red laughs.
"Teams! Teams! Teams! Teams!" The blues all cry out. From there, it devolves into the two groups arguing about teams.
"Kaede... Caboose... I give up." Sarge sighs.
"It was worth a try at least." Kaede comforts him.
"Wait. I can make them listen. I can beat them." Caboose says.
"Son, what are you talking about?" Sarge asks.
"I think he's gonna beat the two groups into submission with force." Kaede explains.
"Heh. I'd like to see that." Sarge says.
"It would be nice to DO that." Kaede hears in her head, and she would be lying if she were to disagree with that thought. She even thought it was her thought and not that of her DNA.
"O'mally taught me how to be mean." Caboose explains with a voice that sounds like he's constipated. "I, just, have, to, concentrate, on, bad, things. Like, milk. No wait, red, Red Bull."
"Son, I think you've really lost it. O'mallys not in your head anymore, he infected the doc." Sarge explains. 'Did he infect me once?' Kaede thinks. 'It would explain that voice telling me to do things.'
"I think I might have been infected by O'mally once, and I didn't do anything violent." Kaede brings up.
"How would you know?" Sarge asks as Caboose keeps concentrating on getting angry.
"Every once in awhile, I would hear this voice telling me to do something. Usually something violent." Kaede explains. "I don't hear it anymore, probably because he's with doc. I don't feel any residual anger or whatever Caboose is implying he has."
Caboose then jumps off the cliff with a dramatic guttural yell.
"Caboose! What are you doing!" Kaede yells to him.
"He's actually gonna take on two army's by himself." Sarge says.
"My name is Michael J. Caboose! An I. Hate. Babies!" Caboose exclaims in a deep voice.
"I guess that disproves my theory." Kaede grumbles.
"Yeah. Next time, just leave that kinda thinking to Simmons." Sarge adds.
"Its the beast! The anti-flag, come to live among us and rule for seven years! The end is nigh!" A red exclaims as Caboose murders his teammates along with the blue zealots.
"He's actually kicking their asses!" Kaede exclaims.
"Damn. Now I wish I got infected my O'mally for a power boost." Sarge grumbles.
"Sarge, Caboose, can you hear me?" The two hear a voice nearby.
"Simmons 2.0?" Sarge questions. He and Kaede turn to see a ghostly green apparition of Simmons.
"I reconfigured the teleporter to allow me to communicate with you." Simmons explains, then notices Kaede. "Oh good! Kaede, you're hear. We were so worried about you."
"Yeah... sorry for running ahead like that." Kaede apologizes.
"No need to apologize. Just get to the teleporter and I'll get you guys out of there." Simmons explains.
"Rodger that. I don't wanna stay in this place any longer." Sarge says. He and Kaede climb down the ladder as Caboose insults the corpses of his victims.
"Come on Caboose! We're leaving!" Kaede calls to him. The three reach the teleporter at the back of the blue base.
"Come on Simmons." Sarge demands as Revelee starts playing again.
"Just give me a few more seconds Sarge." Simmons disembodied voice says.
"We don't have a few more seconds." Sarge complains.
"Your toast has been burned and no amount of scraping will remove the black parts." Caboose says.
"I don't need a reminder on why I skipped breakfast today." Kaede says.
"What?" Sarge asks.
"What?" Kaede repeats. Silence.
"Okay there. Come through now." Simmons breaks it. The three waste no time running through the teleporter to find Simmons waiting for them. "Whoo, that was pretty close huh?"
"Simmons, you get an F in efficiency. But I have to give you an A+ in dramatic timing." Sarge compliments.
"Thank you sir. I've always felt that presentation is what matters most." Simmons says.
"What happened? The last thing I remember was a very mean kitten. And then we were in this janitors closet. And my throat hurts, a lot." Caboose says.
"Janitors closet? This looks more like a portal room from Crash Bandicoot." Kaede says.
"I was thinking the same, except this room looks like shit compared to those." Simmons says. "You also have something on your head, Kaede."
"Right... Simmons. Its time I tell you everything." Kaede sighs.
"Huh?" Is all Simmons can respond with.
"Before you start that, Kaede. I would like to say I forgive you." Sarge says. "For keeping the full truth from us for all those years
"You do?" Kaede exclaims.
"Yeah. And if it makes you feel better, we won't kill the blues. We'll settle for beating them to near death before claiming victory." Sarge explains. "I can still get you that bunk I promised when we get back."
"Right. First lets focus on finding the others and stopping O'mally first. Then we'll continue this." Kaede says.
"Right." Sarge agrees.
"I feel like I'm missing something." Simmons says.
"Right, thats what I wanted to talk to you about." Kaede explains.