After a bunch of dicking around, everyone got a call from Tex to meet up at where O'mally was supposedly holed up. The group had found and repaired a warthog, but that presented a problem.
"How are we all gonna fit in this thing?" Tucker asks.
"We can sit in each other's laps." Donut suggests.
"Fuck that." Tucker responds.
"Fine. You don't wanna ride, you can walk blue." Sarge says. Grif gets into the divers seat, Sarge gets into the back, and Simmons gets shotgun with Donut sitting on his lap.
"God damnit." Simmons curses.
"We can just hang of the sides of the car!" Caboose suggests. "Like in those toy pictures!"
"Shit, thats actually a good idea." Tucker agrees. "It'll be more comfortable than sitting in another guys lap." Tucker and Caboose get on, hang onto each side of the warthog.
"Better not scratch my paint." Sarge warns.
"Your paint? We just found this, the paints already worn." Tucker states.
"Aren't we forgetting one more passenger." Grif brings up. Everyone turns to Kaede.
"Right, Caboose get off. You can walk." Sarge says.
"Okay." Caboose agrees.
"No! Caboose. Its fine. I'll get in the back with Sarge. Theres a little room and I'm smaller than all of you guys anyway." Kaede says. Kaede gets into the back beside Sarge, and while it is cramped, she's in the warthog.
"Get ready. Its probably going to be a bumpy ride." Grif advises. He then shifts the Warthog into gear. "Why isn't this moving?"
"Grif! Whats the hold up!" Sarge demands.
"Hey, you did something wrong. I shifted into drive and the jeeps not moving." Grif complains. Kaede looks over to him.
"Thats cause you shifted into drive with your new boy friend." She says.
"What?" Grif looks to see his hand placed on Donut crotch piece.
"Keep it in your pants, Grif! At least till we defeat O'mally!" Kaede calls over to him as Sarge chuckles. Grif shifts into drive for real this time, and heads off.
"So, a little one on one time when we have it?" Donut asks Grif.
"Shut up or I'm throwing you off." Grif simply says. Before long, they arrive at a facility with a large windmill near the beach.
"What took you guys so long to get here?" a Black soldier asks. Oh right. Tex. Kaede had forgotten about her. In the time they hadn't seen each other, Kaede's opinion of the Freelancer hadn't changed much.
"There's seven of us and this is a three seater jeep. We had to make some compromises." Simmons explains.
"It was a great road trip!" Donut exclaims. "My favourite part was when Grif tried to change gears, and he accidentally-"
"Hugh, please, lets not tell the story. Is there somewhere I can wash my hands?" Grif asks.
"Good thing we're on a beach." Kaede points him to the water to which Grif quickly heads towards.
"What'd you find Tex?" Sarge asks.
"So thats the plan. We just need someone to carry the bomb." Tex finishes.
"If you did all that, why not plant the bomb yourself instead of putting a big X on the floor?" Tucker questions.
"... I can't carry it." Tex admits.
"What?" Grif asks.
"What was that?" Simmons also asks.
"Its too heavy, okay? You happy?" Tex asks.
"Yeah, kinda." Grif admits.
"I need one of you idiots to carry it. I don't have the upper body strength to move it on my own." Tex admits.
"See, girls act like they're so tough, but the first time they need someone to move a couch, who do they call?" Grif brags.
"You called me to move your couch inside red base when you got a new one." Kaede reminds him.
"Yeah. Thats cause you have powers." Grif says, as if to excuse himself.
"How is that relevant?" Kaede asks.
"Its relevant when you can move things with your mind." Grif responds. "If only I had that power."
"If you had that power, I'd have to kill you to stop your laziness from dragging this team down more than it already is." Sarge says. "Besides, this thing ain't so heavy." He walks over to the bomb and tries to pick it up. "Let me, yoooo! That ain't movin."
"As I said. Mind powers." Grif says.
"Grif, they're technically not-" Kaede starts.
"Don't care. Just pick up the stupid bomb." Grif apathetically says. Kaede sighs and extends her invisible hands to the bomb. She attempts to lift, but to her surprise, its actually really heavy. She uses all four of her invisible arms and she can only just barely lift it off the ground.
"Damn. That thing is heavy. Whats it even made of?" Kaede asks.
"Yeah... mind powers." Tex responds. "You idiots seriously can't be stupid enough to think this teenage girl has mind powers."
"Actually, they not mind powers. Kaede explains them as four arms that are invisible to us that come out of her back." Simmons explains. "They can only extend to a range of two meters. Guess they have a limit to how heavy things are."
"Yeah... bullshit." Tex remains unconvinced. Kaede uses her arms to lift the warthog they all just came here in, with Donut still on it.
"Woah!" Donut exclaims as he is lifted into the air. "This is actually kind of fun."
"Well I'll be damned." Tex mutters as she watches Kaede place the Warthog back down.
"You know, those things are kinda selective on what they can and can't lift." Grif says. "A warthogs fucking heavy, and they can lift it. But a bomb the size of a volley ball, nope. That shits too hard."
"Can it numb nuts, or I'll make good on that promise to kill you." Sarge warns.
"I can carry it." Caboose offers.
"If its heavier than a jeep, than I guarantee you'll need more people." Tex advises.
"No its true, he's got crazy strength." Tucker argues. "Church, Nyu and I think its Gods way of compensating."
"See." Caboose grunts as he lifts the bomb.
"Geez! How come you guys never told me about this?" Kaede asks.
"We didn't think it was important." Tucker answers.
"Listen up dirtbags! If we're gonna invade this fortress, we need a good game plan." Sarge announces. "I have two options we can use. Number one, we all run straight at the base in a signal file line, screaming at the top of our lungs. The enemy will be so flabbergasted, by the time they have a chance to regroup, we'll already be inside."
Kaede expected this ridiculous plan. She still remembered Sarges strategy to get into a heavily fortified position by tunnelling there like a cartoon. Tucker however, wasn't used to such an attitude.
"Oh yeah right, they're not gonna be surprised, they're just gonna start mowing us down." He argues.
"Thats the inherit beauty of the single file line." Sarge explains. "They can only kill the person in front. So if we order from least important to most important, with Tucker being in the front and Kaede being in the back, then we might just make it through."
"Don't you think Caboose should be in the back since he's carrying the bomb?" Simmons asks.
"Nope, Caboose is in front of me. We need someone in the back who can objectively evaluate how the plan is working." Sarge continues.
"Wait, how will you know when its not working?" Kaede asks.
"If Caboose dies, I'll know we're in trouble and immediately abort." Sarge explains.
"I think thats a good plan." Caboose agrees.
"I must say sir, I'm surprised you put Kaede above yourself in this plan." Simmons voices.
"Of coarse. Can't have a dead teenage girl on my record." Sarge explains. "Besides, if I'm gonna assault this base after you're all dead, I'm gonna need some help and Kaede's worth around ten of all of you combined."
"You let him talk about you like this?" Tucker whispers to Kaede.
"Its his way of complimenting someone." Kaede explains. "He's the same with Simmons."
"What about Grif?" Tucker asks.
"Sarge, while thats the most retarded idea I've ever heard, I just wanted to thank you for not putting me in front of the line." Grif says.
"Don't get misty, Francine. We'll have already killed you and used your corpses to jam up the windmill." Sarge says.
Kaede bites back a laugh. "Thats an accurate example of their relationship. Man, do I have stories to tell you once this is over."
"I think we can all agree given our situation, its the perfect plan." Sarge states. Everyone doesn't dignify that with a response. "Okay, well, let me tell you about my other plan using parts from the Warthog-"
"As fun as this is, we're wasting time here." Kaede mutters.
"I hope you have a better plan." Grif says to Tex.
"We build what I like to call, the Grif cannon." Sarge continues.
"Can we just get this show on the road! Tex already has a plan!" Kaede announces. Even if Tex didn't have a plan, she wanted to move things along for things to return to normal quickly and to get revenge on O'mally.