A/N: Okay...some of you may notice I've changed the title. I'm turning this into a collection of not quite random short stories; mostly incidents that have been referred to in passing in some of my other fanfictions and which people have commented they'd like to see :P

This one was referred to in Sins of the Mothers, but takes place in Secrets of the Emeralds, in the Casino Zone and on the same night as Tails and Sonic had that argument about the journals...

"NO!"

The word wasn't spoken so much as yelped, and yelped at the top of the speaker's voice at that.

In the luxury hotel room, Sonic sighed. "Tails..."

"No, no, no, no, no! I'm not gonna do it an' you can't make me!"

"But Tails, it's Wednesday—"

"I don't care! An' after what you did earlier you got a real nerve asking me to do something like this!"

Sonic closed his eyes, memories of earlier events momentarily silencing him, then said, "Tails, what does your reading my journal have to do with you taking your weekly bath?"

"You owe me, Sonic! After writing all that mean stuff, why should I spend ages running a bath when my show is on in ten minutes? An' I'm not gonna miss my TV show, Sonic; it's cool and you can learn stuff from it so it's educational!"

Sonic fixed Tails with his best cool look. "Attack of the Psychopathic Mutant Killer Fruit Machines is educational?"

Tails at least had the grace to look away. For about half a second.

"It is! If someone ever puts toxic waste in the sprinkler system an' a fire starts an' mutates all the fruit machines, we gotta know how to beat 'em!"

Sonic rolled his eyes. "Uh huh. Right. I was just thinking only this morning that Mobians don't test their sprinkler systems for toxic waste enough." He sighed. "Tails, I've run the water for you. All you've gotta do is get in, wash and get out. And face it, you've seen all the episodes of that show anyway."

"Nuh uh! No way, Sonic! No way no way no way no way NO WAY NO—"

The door of the hotel room next to them crashed open a split second before Sonic and Tails' did, admitting a scowling Knuckles. Without saying a word, the echidna picked up Tails, holding him at arms' length, then strode into the bathroom.

"Knuckles! Knuckles, what're you doing?" Tails' voice abruptly rose in pitch and volume. "Knucklehead, don't you DARE dump me in the—"

A loud splash came from the bathroom and Tails yelped loudly.

"Shut up," Knuckles ordered curtly from inside.

"Sonic's gonna get real mad at you!"

"Why? Because I managed to get you in the bath after he's been trying to do the same thing for half an hour?"

Moving closer, Sonic heard Tails say, "Yeah, well, I'm not gonna stay in the bath, am I? In fact, I'm done right now. I'll see you—hey, get off! Sonic! Sonic! Sonic, help! Knucklehead's torturing me!"

Sonic, who had hitherto been torn between staying to make sure the echidna wasn't too rough and just letting him get on with it, rolled his eyes. Okay. If that was how Tails wanted it, fine.

Pushing open the bathroom door, he saw that Knuckles was preventing Tails scrambling out by the simple method of pinning him against the wall with one hand.

"Sonic!" Tails wriggled. "Sonic, you gotta help me! He's trying to kill me! He dropped me in the water, Sonic an' he won't lemme out, you gotta do something!"

Sonic folded his arms. "Right, Tails. What do you want me to do, spindash him?"

Tails shook his head. "Nuh uh! Jus' make him put his hands behind his back an' both of you close your eyes and count to a billion an'—OW! Knuckles, that was my eye!"

"Yeah? Well, it was my finger," Knuckles retorted. "Sonic, did you want something?"

"Get me away from this maniac!" Tails shrieked, his voice becoming slightly garbled as Knuckles ducked him under the water.

A gleam crept into Sonic's eyes. "Yeah. I was gonna ask if either of you wanted me to pick up something from the tables. I thought I'd try my luck at pinball."

Tails surfaced again, glaring at Sonic. "You mean you're gonna leave me?"

"Well...you seem happy enough in your bath, kiddo, and since Knux is making sure you stay in it, you might actually get clean. So yeah, I'm gonna leave you for a couple hours. I'm sure you won't drown."

"Not if he keeps his yap shut he won't," Knuckles said ominously.

"See? See? Knucklebrain's gonna kill me!" Tails scowled at the echidna. "Lemme guess, Sonic finally got me insured an' you're gonna split the payoff, right?"

Knuckles rolled his eyes and dunked the fox again, glancing over his shoulder at Sonic. "You still here?"

"Nope. I'll be back in a couple hours." Sonic grinned broadly. "Good luck to you, Knux. You'll need it."

"Sonic?" Knuckles said pleasantly.

"Yeah?"

"I saw Amy Rose heading for the tables not long ago. Good luck to you."

Sonic paled, then abruptly whirled and raced off so fast he blew the door shut behind him. Smirking slightly, Knuckles let a gasping Tails up for air again.

"You got water in my ear!" Tails accused.

"Then flatten your ear and quit thrashing around so much," Knuckles answered. "I'm sick of hearing you and Sonic go through this pantomime every damn time we stop and so I'm telling you; you are not getting out of this water until I've got you clean. Do you understand me?"

Tails scowled at Knuckles. "The water's almost cold, Knucklehead!"

"That's your fault, kid, not mine. You could've been done half an hour ago if you'd cooperated, and watching your trash TV. Now hold still. I want to wash your head some more."

"If you think I'm gonna let you shove my head under—" Tails began, then broke off abruptly as Knuckles picked up a large soap dish and filled it with water. "You wouldn't dare!"

The echidna caught hold of Tails, not roughly but firmly enough to ensure he couldn't wriggle away, then dumped the contents of the soap dish over the fox's head, ignoring the outraged shriek.

"Quit yelping," Knuckles said sharply. "Anyone would think I was torturing you."

"You are! You—" Tails broke off and spluttered as a generous portion of soap and water found its way into his mouth. "Knuckles!" he said, somewhat indistinctly. "You did that on purpose!"

"I do everything on purpose, kid," Knuckles answered coolly. "And if you spit it on my fur, I'll hold your head under the water again, only this time I won't let you up until you pass out."

Tails, who had been about to do just that, hesitated before spraying his mouthful into the bath instead and saying, "You wouldn't really, would you?"

"You push me that little bit further and you'll find out," retorted Knuckles, who wouldn't but had no intention of letting Tails know.

The threat worked better than he'd hoped; the fox shut his mouth with a snap and didn't move or speak until Knuckles had finished scrubbing him clean.

"There." The echidna hoisted Tails out, dumped him unceremoniously on his backside and threw a towel over him. "Now dry yourself off and brush your fur out, or do I have to do that for you as well?"

"I don't have a furbrush, Knuckles," Tails said, in a quieter voice than usual. This much was true, but only because Tails had 'accidentally' dropped it out of the Tornado a few months ago. He'd been pleased with himself at the time, but now all he could feel was a strange sense of dread; suppose Knuckles took it upon himself to groom Tails with those spikes on his hands?

In all fairness, Knuckles had no intention of doing any such thing, but the thought of it was enough to subdue the fox.

"Use the complimentary one," Knuckles said flatly.

"There isn't one."

Knuckles blinked – there was a complimentary furbrush in his room – then said, "Why not?"

There was a long, long silence, then Tails said nervously, "Maybe someone took it on a bingo slide an' dropped it through one of the holes."

Knuckles rolled his eyes. "Alright. Wait here and I'll get mine. You start drying yourself off."

"I don't like drying myself with towels, Knucklehead; it makes my fur puff out."

Knuckles fixed the stubborn fox with an icy stare. "Tails?"

Realising for the first time that he might have pushed the echidna too far, Tails squirmed. "Uh...yeah?"

Knuckles thrust the towel into Tails' arms. "Get on with it and quit whining! And if you're not at least half dry by the time I get back, I'll towel you myself."

The echidna supposed that Sonic might consider his methods unnecessarily harsh, but damn it all to hell, it wasn't as if the hedgehog had had any success with his softly-softly approach!

Knuckles pushed open the door to his bathroom – he'd flatly refused to share a hotel room with Sonic and Tails – and picked up the furbrush. It was good quality – no more than he'd expect from a five star hotel – but Knuckles himself never bothered with brushing; his fur was far too short to worry about.

He glanced at the clock and decided he'd give Tails another thirty seconds to dry himself before going back. Knuckles shook his head irritably. No echidna puggle would be permitted to behave as Tails had done.

Turning abruptly, he strode out and into Tails' room, where the little fox was standing in the bedroom looking very forlorn.

"Don't give me that big-eyed look, kid," Knuckles said unsympathetically. "Are you dry?"

Tails, who had cheated on the towelling by shaking himself vigorously all over, nodded and took the furbrush.

"Knuckles?" he said suddenly.

"One more argument out of you, kid, and I'll knock you tail over snout. I mean it."

"No, it's jus'..."

"Just what?" the echidna demanded tersely. Bathing a two-tailed fox had not been among his plans for that evening!

Tails looked up, still clutching the furbrush. "Well...Sonic's not here, else I'd ask him so...uh..." He held out the brush. "C'n you do my back? 'Cause it's not fair to get mad at me for not brushing everywhere when I can't reach behind me."

Knuckles opened his mouth to retort that he wasn't a damn hairdresser, then swallowed the retort. Tails was right; fair was fair.

"Alright." He took the furbrush with a bad grace. "Turn around."

The fox obeyed, although he kept one eye and ear on the echidna as the brushing started. Tails winced away several times, although Knuckles wasn't being deliberately rough.

"See, this is why I never brush my fur 'less I have to," Tails mumbled.

"Yeah," Knuckles answered coolly, "and that's why it's such a big deal when you do. If you did this every night, or even every other night, you wouldn't have these problems."

Tails flattened his ears. "I don't like baths, Knux. Sonic never takes a bath."

That one was just too easy, Knuckles thought. Aloud he said, "You're not Sonic, kid."

"Yeah, but how come his fur doesn't get all tangled an' matted?"

"Stop wriggling," Knuckles ordered. Tails stopped obligingly, but half turned his head to talk to the echidna.

"But how come, Knuckles? I wanna know."

The echidna sighed. "Sonic's fur doesn't get all tangled and matted because there's not enough of it. You, on the other hand, have fur that's six inches thick in places and a tendency to crawl and play in anything remotely muddy." Knuckles pulled harder than he'd intended on a stubborn tangle, causing Tails to yip in protest. "Sorry. As I was saying, you wanna play, kid, fine, but you gotta take the consequences. In this case, a bath and a good fur brushing." Temporarily giving up on the brush, he used one of his spikes to break through the knots, then resumed brushing.

"Don't like fur brushings," Tails mumbled.

"And I don't like eight year old kids who act like spoilt toddlers, Tails, so it doesn't look like either of us are going to be particularly happy tonight, does it?"

Tails yipped again, this time in indignation and twisted around to glare at Knuckles. "I am not acting like a spoilt toddler!"

"You are when you act like you did back then. Turn around, Tails, and let me finish, or I'll hold you down."

Tails complied. He'd already learned that the echidna didn't make empty threats.

"Knux?" he said, after a few seconds had gone past.

"What now?"

"You like me really, right?"

"When you act your age, yeah, I guess I do. When you act like you did just now, no. In fact, when you do that, I usually want to give you a damn good slap and tell you to grow up."

Tails flicked an ear nervously. "So how come you didn't do that when you found me on that platform?"

Knuckles sighed. "There's a difference between being immature and being childish. Going off in a sulk was immature, but frankly, I didn't expect anything else from someone your age. Add that to the fact that I thought you had every right to be angry at Sonic for what he wrote in his journal...violence is the last resort."

"Yeah?" Curious now, Tails turned his head to look at the echidna. "So what's the first?"

"Threatening violence, of course." Knuckles stopped brushing. "Alright, your back's done." Thrusting the brush at Tails, he added, "Now get on and do the rest of it, and if it's not finished by the time Sonic gets back, I'll slam dunk you into the toilet and flush it."

Tails yipped in alarm and started tugging the brush through his tangled belly fur. Satisfied, Knuckles turned to go.

"Knuckles?"

"What?"

"C'n I watch TV while I do it?"

Knuckles snorted. "What d'you need my permission for? I don't care if you do backflips around the room, so long as you're finished when Sonic returns."

Turning back, he strode out of the room, slamming the door behind him. For a minute, Tails considered defying Knuckles, then he thought of the echidna's likely reaction and lost his nerve. Picking up the remote, he turned on the TV – he'd missed Attack of the Psychopathic Mutant Killer Fruit Machines, but the show that followed wasn't too bad – and started to tug the brush through his belly fur.

By the time Sonic (who had played seven rounds of aerial bingo before managing to get a perfect score) returned, Tails had finished and was lying flat out on the mattress.

Glancing up at the hedgehog, Tails smiled sheepishly.

"Hi Sonic."

Sonic stared at the incredibly clean and well-groomed (and somewhat subdued) Tails who was lying on his bed watching cartoons, then shook his head with a grin.

Man, I shoulda called in Knux ages ago...

Well, another random 'expansion fic' :P Hope you liked it and if you read, please leave a review! Thanks :D