Conversations
Cally raised her head from the pillow to look at him.
"Do you think we should tell the others about this?" she asked.
Avon turned his head to meet her gaze. Her face was calm, her eyes giving nothing away. From what he'd learned about her so far, he felt he knew how to read her reactions, but he wanted to make sure.
"About what?" he asked her in return, testing. "This…relationship?"
To his relief Cally's eyes lit up with laughter.
"Relationship!" she scoffed, pushing at his shoulder. "I would hardly call one night together a relationship, and I do not believe you would either. Especially if my impression of you so far is right."
"Oh?" Avon raised an eyebrow. "And what is that?"
"You want me to tell you?" Cally half-sat up, propping her head on her arm.
"Well… brilliant. Dedicated. Utterly ruthless and cold-hearted if that is what it takes. But you can be passionate as well, if something moves you. And I'm not talking about what happened last night."
Avon grinned at her in genuine amusement.
"So what do you mean?" he questioned.
"Well," Cally sat up, pulling the sheet up to her chest as she did. Avon found it almost endearing that she felt she needed to do that, considering. He hadn't put Cally down as being coy. Certainly not after how she'd been with him the previous night.
"You claim the only reason you stay with Blake is because this ship and all it has is your best chance for survival, but anyone can see that isn't true."
"It isn't?" Avon replied, deadpan.
Cally shook her head. "No. You may not have the same reasons as Blake does, but you do want to see the Federation destroyed, and that is why you stay with him. That, and whatever trace of loyalty you haven't managed to wipe out yet."
"I see. And what, you figured all this out last night?"
"Hardly." Cally gave him a look. "Avon, you are not as closed off as you think you are, even if I cannot read your mind."
"Perhaps it's for the best that you can't," Avon replied, another grin breaking out across his face. "Otherwise you would have a rather unfair advantage over me."
"Yes. But you still have not answered my question."
"Which was?"
"Whether we should let the others know we are sleeping together."
"Oh? This is an arrangement now? I wasn't aware I'd signed anything."
Cally hit him in the shoulder, but it was a friendly blow, which he was grateful for. He'd seen Cally fight, and he wasn't sure if she wasn't actually capable of besting him in an unarmed fight, if it came to it.
"You know what I mean. Neither of us is looking for anything more, certainly not some declaration of feeling for one another. At the very least that would complicate everything too much."
Cally met his eyes again, and this time he could see something in them.
"And there's someone else, isn't there? Not on this ship, but inside your head. Someone you did have feelings for?"
Avon paused to consider his reply, surprising himself by deciding on honesty.
"Yes."
"What happened to her?"
"She's dead. The Federation killed her."
"I'm sorry." Her words sounded genuine, tinged with sorrow.
"And you?" he asked, almost gently. "Is there someone in your head?"
"Not anymore," she replied shortly. "I prefer it if things do not get complicated, if possible."
"No arguments here."
"I know. That is one of the reasons why I knew you would be…suitable."
"Suitable? I'm sorry if I don't meet all your requirements. Did you write out a list comparing everyone on board before deciding who to sleep with?" Avon asked, but he was amused rather than annoyed.
"Do not be ridiculous. I only meant that I knew you would feel the same way about complicating our working relationship by conducting some form of affair. This is hardly the ideal situation for that kind of thing, even if we were considering it."
"I agree. And in answer to your question, I don't see why we should need to. If anyone has a problem with it, then let them find out for themselves."
"You think someone will?"
"Possibly. I don't relish the idea of a lecture from our beloved leader if he thinks we are being…inappropriate."
"I do not believe Blake will be concerned with what any of us do. And I do not believe we will encounter any problems with Vila or Gan either."
"And Jenna?" Avon asked, noting that she had neglected to mention the blonde pilot.
"Ah. I am not sure about Jenna," Cally replied, laying back down and resting her head against Avon's chest. "She does not seem to like me very much."
"Jenna? What makes you say that?" Avon asked, absently twisting a strand of Cally's hair through his fingers.
"She never wanted me to come on board. And then she wanted to throw me off the ship after the…incident, with the Lost."
Avon smiled once more.
"So did I. For the briefest of moments."
"I am aware of that, Avon. I more than anyone know that you will not allow anything you consider a threat to remain that way. But Jenna – she sees me as a different kind of threat. It is not because I am an alien."
"How do you mean?"
Cally hesitated before replying.
"Jenna is used to being the only woman amongst men. It is how she defines herself. She does not care for competition."
Avon stopped, his interest caught at her words.
"Competition?"
"Yes." Cally sat up once more. "I will leave it as saying that perhaps you are not the only one who refers to our leader as 'beloved.'"
"Really?" Avon let the implications of her words sink in. Jenna - and Blake? That was… interesting. He wondered if Blake was aware of this.
"Fascinating."
"Indeed," Cally replied. "Perhaps I should not be concerned as to what Blake would say about us. It may be that he will have other issues to keep him occupied."
Avon glanced over at her, but she was half-laughing.
"What about Jenna? Are you worried about her?"
"Worried? About Jenna?" Cally asked scornfully. "She is no real threat to me. Perhaps if I were to tell her about us she would no longer see me as a challenge to her place here. Especially when Blake is making her teach me how to operate the Liberator."
"Ah."
Now things were clearer to Avon. He had not bothered to concern himself too much with tensions and relationships between the rest of the crew but he could see it may be to his interest to keep an eye on how these things developed. He knew that whatever he shared with Cally did not constitute an allegiance as such, and that he should not expect to rely on her support simply because she had shared his bed, but it was useful to know that she at least liked his company. And he liked hers.
He watched her get up and begin to dress. It was refreshing to meet someone who's outlook on life was, in some ways, similar to his own. It was especially unusual considering that she was a telepath, and therefore so much more sensitive to emotions, although perhaps that was why. If she had grown up in a society in which everything was a group experience, she may have learned how to restrain her own much better since leaving it.
She had not told him everything about why she had left Auron, that much he was aware of, but he suspected that whatever it was had hurt her deeply, and that had led to her locking off her emotions in much the same way that he did, if for different reasons. In some ways, they were very much alike. Perhaps she had been right earlier when she said they were well suited. Cally finished dressing and turned back to him.
/ I will see you again soon / she telepathed to him with a smile, then turned and left his room, the door closing behind her.
Avon leaned back against the pillows with a smile of his own. The way Cally chose to occasionally touch his mind instead of speaking aloud was interesting to say the least, a unique experience. He had never met a telepath before, and the concept fascinated him, more than the woman herself, although she fascinated him perhaps more than he cared to admit. His mind already moving on to other thoughts, Avon got up and dressed.
As much as he had enjoyed the events of that night, there was a lot else that he had to do, and only a little of it involved Cally. Avon was not one who could ever be accused of wasting or ignoring opportunities when they presented themselves, and he intended to make the most he could out of his current situation. He had only just begun to gain a real understanding of this ship, and he wanted to learn as much as he could, so that he was equipped to deal with anything that came along. If there was one thing Avon had learned from his life so far, it was that anything that could happen, often did, and the best way to face it was to be ready for anything. And he often was.