Author Notes: Hey all, first actual fan fiction I wanted to work on so all suggestions helpful.

Fandom: Buffy

Genre: Romance

Pairing: S/X with a hint of XSA

Xander whimpered out softly as his vampire lover hugged him from behind. Leaning back he smiled at the feeling of comfort that swept over him. It had been a long time since either had felt the this feeling of comfort, even longer since they had seen each other. The Scoobies were dead; most killed by the First. Xander had survived- Dawn too, but she could not live with the though of her lost sister so she soon followed into the darkness. Xander had been traveling around since then, teaching slayers to fight, the second wave led by Xander had overthrown the First. At a price though; not only were there hundreds of slayers but a new power had awakened. Xander's soul now joined with Sahara lived life without the gift of sight. It hadn't been longer after Spike had found him.

There had been a war with the senior partners involving Angel and his partners. Spike had been there also; he had sacrificed himself destroying the First's hell mouth army, but in vain. Nobody had counted on the other army, one much stronger that had come after the death of Spike. When Spike had awakened the scoobies had died though none of the people from Los Angelos had known at the time, they had assumed there had been a victory after the whole that had shown where Sunnydale had been. The First then had been quiet, regrouping for the second battle. In the end Xander had contacted Angel and the others, a tense moment. After the knowledge of the Scooby death Angel had tried balancing both but it had not come to be so, Xander left to help Angel with his slayers. In the end they had won, leaving a Demon God, what was left of the European Scourge and a hyena child.

Xander was brought from his thoughts as a tongue licked near his collar. A smooth voice rang in his ears, "missed you pet. Gods, been too long Xan. Won't leave again, forget Peaches and his bloody kid. Missed you…Love you."

Xander could feel tears collect in his eyes, "Love you too Spike. Missed you so much, thought I wouldn't hear you again, feel you again. Don't leave again."

"Mmm, nummy. Promise, won' leave you. M'right here, feel me all you want luv," Xander smiled gently. This was what he fought for, being here with no troubles. Ignoring the pain, the hurt, only Spike was here now.

He was startled though when a cough sounded at the door. He turned around to face in the general direction, seeing nothing. Spike he figured smelt his sadness because those arms around him tightened. He sighed in content at the feel. He blushed, much to his embarrassment as Angel stepped towards him. A soft nuzzle at the back of his neck noted him of his lover's content, he found himself whimpering as Angel's arms also wrapped around him. A tongue ran itself down the front of his neck and he found himself moaning for more, "Angel." He whined softly as that mouth left him and those arms left.

"Don't worry, I shall be back. Take care of him Will."

Xander knew Angel would be back this night, but he missed the contact, even if it be from two vampires he had once loathed.

"No brooding luv, soon you'll need gel for that hair. And I like it just the way it is," Xander chuckled at that before spinning around. Startled- he supposed Spike was as their bodies fell back.

Xander fell easily onto Spike's smaller frame, knowing he wouldn't hurt him the least with his larger form, "not going to be your sire Spike."

"Bloody hell, no soodin' way will you be that damned poofter."

Xander smiled sadly before tracing Spike's features with a finger, "God I wish I could see you Spike. I want to know what you look like now, haven't seen you forever."

The voice that replied Xander noted was slightly strained, "wish you could see me too pet. Wish this wasn't up to you, wish even the slayer could've been there protecting you and the bit. Stopping all this…suppose you wouldn't want that though. Nah you always were the white knight, rushing in to be the hero huh luv." Xander smiled gently, tilting his head up so he could brush his lips against slightly cooler ones. A kiss was nothing more but the press of skin to skin but here it left Xander breathless, wanting, needing. Pulling away he smiled gently, licking Spike's lips before recapturing them. Brushing of lips, slips of tongues, wandering of hands; it had been much too long. He could feel hands on his shoulders and soon he was pushed back until he was the one lying under Spike being thoroughly ravished.

"Want to feel you pet, want to be in you."

"Gods, Spike please!"

"So beautiful nummy, gonna make you all mine."

"I'm yours, Spike please," he gasped as his shirt was pulled over his head and soon those wonderful lips were attached to his neck. Sucks and licks sent Xander spiraling in a pleasure only Spike could give. With a grope and the rest of his clothes gone, Xander was sure his mind had left him.

Review and tell me if I should add more.