Author's Note:
Ok guys this is the 2nd to last chapter!!! Hope you like it!!!
Jazzy-Raveler!
Chapter 7-One Unsweet Day
Emma:
I'm just minding my own business, walking up to my house...
When I see that the ambulance is outside!
My mom is crying!
And my heart races...
What the hell happened!
Sorry, I never told you
All I wanted to say
Sean:
I'm home from work.
No messages,
No food,
No Emma,
My life sucks right about now.
I'm tired of just sitting around depressed so I walk out the house,
Get in my car and start driving.
Rolling down some street or another as I stop at the light,
"Sean!" I hear someone yell and I turn around to see Manny Santos racing up to me.
She looks real messed up.
Like she's been...crying? I guess?
Maybe she was watching some dumb soap, I think
And I shake my head, about to smile...
The only person I know who breaks down crying more than Manny Santos, is Em-
Emma! I think and glancing towards Manny...noticing how desperately she's racing to get to me
I think
Where's Emma?!
I can't even think about what might've happened
"Manny, what's wrong! Is it...is it Emma!"
I can barely stand to say the words
But I still do.
What the hell would I do if something happened to her...?
Everything...gone.
Just like that.
No chance of ever seeing her again...
And now it's too late to hold you
'Cause you've flown away
"It's not Emma Sean..."
Manny says, as she yanks open the door and slides into my car...
"It's Snake! He had a heart attack Sean! I need to get to the hospital pls? Hurry!"
I start driving...
And I breathe a sigh of relief that nothing happened to Emma
And then I feel real guilty for thinking that.
Mr. Simpson is, you know, the closest thing I ever had to a mentor...
Or whatever.
What would happen if he died...
I don't know...
But I keep driving
Feeling so sorry for Emma,
Already...
Emma:
Oh my God!
I can't breathe...
I can't think...
What in the world is happening?
"Mom!" I say, when I see my her walking towards me in the hospital lobby
"Is he going to be ok?"
Mom starts crying,
"We don't know yet honey..."
She's saying and something else too.
But I'm not listening...
My mind is somwhere else...
So far away
Thinking about Snake;
Everything he means to me
My dad...
My dad!
The only dad I've ever had,
And I start crying thinking...
He can't die!
He can't!
Never had I imagined
Living without your smile
Sean:
Manny practically leaps out the car and races for the hospital doors.
I get out too, but I don't know if I can go in there.
For one thing, I really hate hospitals
And just...
Just thinking that Mr. Simpson is in there?
Maybe dying...?
I don't wanna deal with it and I turn around, to get back in the car
But then,
Then...?
I remember...
Emma...
She's in there...
Maybe crying...
Most definitely crying...
And I know that I have to see her...tell her it'll be ok...try and stop her from thinking some of the crazilt bad things that I just know she's thinking.
Suddenly, pretending that I don't care about her?
It doesn't even matter,
And I walk towards the hospital doors taking a deep breath as I push the doors open,
Just knowing that Emma's voice will be enough for me to be able to stand being here...
Feeling and knowing you hear me
It keeps me alive
Emma:
Snake's dead!
I know he is!
He has to be...
His heart can't take this;
I mean, he already had cancer...
Now a heart attack?
Even Snake isn't going to be strong enough to deal with this.
I shake my head and start to cry some more.
"It'll be ok Em," Manny says, hugging me
"No, Manny, it won't. Snake's gonna die."
"Emma, don't say that!"
"Manny, how much do you think can he take? I'm not going to sit here pretending that everything's gonna be okay, alright?! Nothing ever is!"
I yell and Manny starts to cry.
I didn't mean to make her cry but, I mean...
Snake's dead!
I just know he is..
And I know you're shining down on me from heaven
Like so many friends we've lost along the way
And I know eventually we'll be together
One sweet day
Sean:
I walk into the lobby and see Manny crying and hugging a pale looking blonde.
It's Emma of ocurse and I walk over to the 2 of them.
"C-Can I sit?" I ask, not sure what she'll say.
Emma doesn't even look at me.
"Of course, Sean." Manny says, motioning with her free arm to the chair on the other side of her.
I sit down...and wait.
"Have we...I mean do they know anything yet?"
I ask, rubbing my hands together nervously.
Manny shakes her head,
"No. We don't. Spike went to go check."
I nod.
Then I look at Emma
She looks so scared.
I wish I could hug her,
But, lucky me, Manny's already got that covered.
Besides...
She doesn't seem like she wants anything to do with me anyway...
I'm so sorry about all the crap that happened with us...
About what's happening now...
But...I still love her.
And I wish I could say that to her...now
Before anything worse happens...
Darling, I never showed you
Assumed you'd always be there
I took your presence for granted
Emma:
Sean's here.
I can't believe he's actually here.
I haven't seen him since...well since forever it seems like.
And it kinda hurts that this is what it took for me to see him again.
Just like us...
Tragic.
"I'm gonna go check on your mom, ok?"
Manny says, and she stands up, walking towards the hospital hallway.
Manny knew, she just knew, that I wanted to check on mom, but wouldn't be able to...
She's the best friend ever...
Now, that I'm just sitting here...staring...
I try not to think about Sean being here,
Because if Snake's dead?
I mean, what does Sean even matter?
He doesn't, I tell myself.
I have too much other stuff going on,
I think,
But...
Still...
I can't believe he's actually here.
For Snake...
For me...
Right when I needed him to be.
And...
Even though he doesn't matter...
I still have to tell him...
But I always cared
And I miss the love we shared
Sean:
Man!
This is really just...messed up!
Emma looks at me
And I have to look away
I wanna hug her so bad
Tell her, it'll be alright
But...I can't.
Suddenly, I feel her warm hand slipping onto mine.
And I feel her squeezing my hand tightly.
"Sean? Thank you...for being here."
I look at her and I smile.
But, I feel her fingers; they're shaking
And she looks so scared.
I wish I could just tell her.
"You don't have to thank me, Emma,"
I say, instead.
"Sean," she says crying,
"Snake's dead, Sean! I just know he is!"
And she leans over throwing her arms around me.
I shake a little as I hug her gently...kissing her hair...too softly for her to feel...
And I know you're shining down on me from heaven
Like so many friends we've lost along the way
And I know eventually we'll be together
One sweet day
Emma:
This feels so good
And so wrong,
And so...scary.
"He's not Emma. Don't say that..."
Sean says to me,
"He has to be Sean. I mean, everything been going wrong, why would his heart attack all of a sudden go so right?"
I say and I shake my head, crying harder, when he doesn't answer.
Once again replaying all my memories,
of Sn-
My dad, in my head.
How am I going to deal with this?
Although the sun will never shine the same
I'll always look to a brighter day
Sean:
I hope Emma's not right..
I mean, everything this year has pretty much sucked
Except for her, of course.
But...that's over...
Mr. Simpson, dead?
I can't even think that way.
He always helped me out.
He was always there for me
He always forgave me, even when I messed up bad.
I can't-I mean, I never really thought about him dying.
Not even when he had cancer...
I don't know why...
Come on Mr. Simpson! Don't do this!
I think.
Then remembering how sad Emma was when she thought Snake was going to die of cancer;
Scares me, thinking how she'll feel if he actually does.
Emma needs you!
Then, I can finally feel the tears and reality hitting me as I think...
I need you!
Lord I know when I lay me down to sleep
You will always listen as I pray
Emma:
"Emma?! It's Manny." Sean says and sitting up away from his shoulder
I see Manny rushing up to us.
"Emma! He's awake! He's ok, Em!"
She say smiling and crying
"The doctors said he's gonna be ok!"
Thank God!!!
I think.
I'm still crying though,
And...
I think Sean started crying,
But, I just stand up and hug Manny, smiling.
"Come on!" she says grabbing my hand we both rush toward the lobby door.
Sean, I think, stopping.
Sean, who was here when I needed him...
Who I now realize is still just as beloved to me as he always has been.
I look back at him, he's sitting in the chair smiling after us.
Trying, I'm sure, to look like he knew all along that everything was gonna be fine.
His eyes are dry; he wiped away the tears.
Typical Sean Cameron, I think, but I smile and yanking Manny back with me in the process, I rush over and grab Sean's shaky hand.
"Sean?! Come on already!"
Sean:
I stand up-well, Emma forces me up but, whatever-
And I walk after Emma and Manny into Mr. Simpson's room.
Mrs. Nelson is standing there holding his hand.
He looks over at us and says nodding weakly and kinda holding up Mrs. Nelson's hand.
"Nothing like waking up...and finding out...that she's still willing to hold your hand..."
I guess Emma had forgotten that she was still holding my hand...
I hadn't and I sigh with a smile as Mr. Simpson says this
But, I can feel Emma whencing a little and then she gently drops my hand.
I don't think about this...
I just shove my hands into my pockets and focus on Mr. Simpson...
He looks so...dead,
That's the only way I can think.
But he's not,
So, I can smile about the thought.
He's not.
Manny and Emma walk over to his bedside.
Emma grips his free hand tightly and Manny leans over kissing his cheek.
I just stand in the doorway staring at the...family and smiling at the sight.
"Sean," he says tiredly as he glances over at me, seems like he just noticed I was here...
"So glad you could...make it..."
For some reason, I can feel tears rushing to my eyes again and I try to talk to him,
Try to tell him-them, really-that I'm sorry for putting his family; his daughter; him through so much bullcrap.
"Mrs. Nelson? Mr. Simpson? I'm really-"
Mrs. Nelson walks over to me shaking her head and after hugging me says
"Don't, honey. He needs his rest, ok?"
I nod a little and she leans toward me whispering with an understanding expression
"And...we know."
She says before squeezing my arm and walking back over to Snake, who nods at me a little and closes his eyes sleepily.
I love Emma's family.
And...
I look over at Emma and she's looking back at me, smiling...
Even though she's still crying...
She's still...beautiful
And I realize that I can't deal with this anymore.
"I-I gotta go." I say and I walk out the room
Wishing I could just say it before I go...
But I can't.
Especially not now...
So I just walk out,
Walk away,
I'll have to deal with...us some other time.
Emma:
Sean's leaving,
I wanna rush out after him,
Tell him to stay.
He's like family to us by now anyway.
Well...
To them...
He's so much more than that to me
But I can't go after him...
Still can't,
So I just grip Snake's hand tightly.
Telling myself,
Snake's ok. That's what really matters.
But one of the tears that falls?
It's not because of Snake.
It's because I wish I'd gone after Sean...
And I'm just hoping that the next time I see him...
I'll finally be able to tell him...
Sorry I never told you
All I wanted to say ...