"Home sweet home." Phelan announced as the Omegas gathered in their new base. They had to admit, it was a step up from the dorms of the Massachusetts Academy. It was big enough for all seven Omegas—plus Naomi—with room to spare; it was high tech, completely hidden from the outside world, and stocked with enough supplies to last for a year. The Hellfire Club had spared no expense.
"Everyone finished unpacking?" Vladimir asked. A chorus of weary groans answered him. "Good. We've got combat practice in two hours." Another, louder, chorus of groans answered him, liberally peppered with curses in half a dozen languages.
"I thought we'd be finished with all that training stuff after we left the Academy!" Rodriguez groaned.
"Yeah, the last three weeks were nothing but training and practicing." Jacques agreed. "Wasn't that enough mon ami?"
"If you think that's tough, you're not going to like what Miss Frost told me." Vladimir sighed. "Cobra wants to attack The Pit the day after tomorrow. We'll be their 'secret weapon,' as Cobra Commander put it." Regardless of the necessity, Vladimir could hardly stand the Cobra leaders he reported to.
"Waitaminute, we haven't even been attached to Cobra for a week and Cobra Commander want us in an all out assault the Joe's base?" Amira asked. "What is he, stupid?"
"Yes." Vlad said simply. "He seems to think that one addition to Cobra's side will somehow change Cobra's luck enough to actually win a battle and end their embarrassing losing streak." If any of the Omegas were American they would've inserted a joke about the Red Sox or the Cubs at this point.
"So you don't think we can win?" Takashi asked.
"On our first engagement against the Joes and the Misfits?" Vladimir snorted. "No."
"We'll have Cobra on our side." Semira pointed out hopefully.
"Oh come on!" Amira said. "Is that supposed to reassure us? Have you read the files Miss Frost gave us on those guys?"
"Yeah, they make the French Army look dangerous." Phelan snickered.
"Oh shut up!" Jacques snapped irritably. "I don't know why everyone picks on the French Army! The Italians are way worse than us! They got beat by our forces when they invaded us in 1940!"
"Beaten by the French…how low can you get?" Semira teased. Jacques shot daggers at her.
"Very funny." He grumbled.
"So what're we doing, going along with this if we can't win?" Semira asked Vladimir.
"I assume we're not going on a banzai charge." Takashi stated.
"No offense, but haven't your people ever noticed the fact that banzai charges don't f&#ing work?" Amira asked him. "Everyone who attempts one gets killed!"
"Well if all our troops get killed then there wouldn't be anyone left to tell us they don't work, now would there?" Takashi said with a straight face.
"Moving along…" Vladimir sighed, rolling his eyes. "We're going because Cobra Commander stamped and pouted and got Miss Frost to order us to go. At any rate it'll be a chance to see the Misfits in action. The reports they gave us on them can only tell us so much."
"Yeah, that they're all nuts." Amira muttered. Phelan broke into a fake coughing fit that seemed to include the words 'takes one to know one!'
"Why the day after tomorrow?" Semira asked Vlad as Amira started throttling Phelan.
"Don't you know what today is? What date it is?" Semira frowned.
"It's the second of July." Jacques said, blinking.
"Then the day after tomorrow would be…" Rodriguez began. Vladimir smiled.
"Exactly. Can you think of a more fitting date to attack? Americans like celebrating their independence with a bang. All we're doing is providing a few…extra ones."
"Besides," Vlad grinned. "It'll give us the chance to…introduce ourselves. After all, isn't that what bourgeois politeness dictates?"
00000000000000
"Man I wish they'd knock if off with the explosions." Toad grumbled as he heard another boom. "At this rate they'll run out before the big show tonight! I wanna blow stuff up too!" The Misfits were lounging about Misfit Manor listening to the explosions that wracked the base.
"Don't worry I'm sure we'll have enough for our Fourth of July Party." Althea assured him as explosions sounded across The Pit. "It's not like we're going to run out or anything." She cocked her head as she heard another series of booms. "Although…"
"ATTENTION!" General Hawk's strained voice came over The Pit's PA system. "WE ARE UNDER ATTACK! THIS IS NOT, REPEAT—NOT—THE GOOD KIND OF EXPLOISIONS! WE ARE UNDER ATTAC—KEEERSSHW!" The radio cut out.
"Misfits!" Althea called out. "We've got a battle on our doorsteps, so let's roll out the welcome wagon! YO JOE!"
"YO JOE!" The rest of the Misfits cried out as they ran towards the sound of battle.
"COBRAAA!" Came the returning cry as Cobra tanks and vehicles leading a massive invasion force slammed into the Joes defenses. The Dreadnoks were right in the thick of it too.
"We gotta help 'em!" Toad said as the Joes and Cobras traded fire. A sudden explosion at the Joes aircraft and vehicle hangar caused them all to come to a ragged halt.
"They can handle themselves, we have to check that out!" Althea pointed as they headed towards the hangar.
"Oh my god!" Angelica said in horror as they saw blazing tanks and wrecked aircraft lying at the mouth of the hangar, all of it belonging to GI Joe. Smoke and fire was everywhere, and strewn on the ground were wounded soldiers.
Some of them were very familiar. "Bazooka!" Althea cried out as she saw him groaning on the ground. "What happened?"
"Cobras…" He ground out, obviously in a lot of pain. "In the hangar…attacked us…"
"What? Where are they? How'd they do this?" Althea asked urgently. Bazooka passed out. "Lina! Take care of Bazooka and the others! The rest of you with me! When we find whoever did this…" Althea growled, looking at the damage done to her home. "We make them pay."
"A bold claim, mademoiselle. But can you back it up?" A voice called. The Misfits looked up to see a cocky looking unarmed teenager in the blue uniform of a Cobra viper, minus the headgear, waiting for them.
"He's working for Cobra, yo!" Toad said, pointing.
"Get him!" Fred yelled as he charged at the lone solider, who merely stood his ground and waited.
Just as Fred was about to bowl the smaller teen over, he casually raised his arm and flicked his wrist. Fred flew sideways, propelled by some unseen force and crashed headfirst into a wall.
"FREDDY!" Toad yelled.
"Watch it he's a telekinetic!" Xi warned.
"Very astute mon ami. Too bad for your fat friend that you didn't figure it out sooner." Jacques said.
"Who are you and why are you working for Cobra?" Althea demanded, holding onto her temper with both hands. "Why'd you attack us?"
"I am called Forceflow. And I'm going to beat the merde out of you!" The rechristened Jacques shouted as he telekinetically shoved them back to the entrance of the hangar.
"He's strong." Lance breathed as he got back on his feet.
"You can't beat us all!" Xi snarled.
"That's my job." A feminine voice said as a second figure in Cobra uniform walked out of the smoke to stand next to Forceflow. "Before you ask, I might as well tell you that my name is Evasia." Amira grinned at the sound of her new name. "The lizard is mine." She told Jacques a.k.a. Forceflow.
"As you wish." He said gamely as she ran on ahead.
"She's fast." Althea said, blinking as Evasia crossed from the far end of the hangar to about midway in almost no time flat.
"But not as fast as me!" Pietro said as he dashed ahead, a silverish blur that streaked across the hangar floor. "Wanna play a game of chicken?" He called out to the still running, but much slower Evasia.
"Pietro watch out!" Angelica warned as a swirling, man-sized purple and yellow portal opened up right in front of the speedster. He ran into it before he even realized it was there and it closed up before his teammates could do a thing.
"What'd you to do him?" Wanda growled at Evasia who now stood still in the center of the hangar.
"Me? Not a thing." She said neutrally. "Vortex, however, is another story."
"That would be me." Semira said as she appeared from behind one of the tanks. "If you want him back so badly…here." She raised her palm and the same purple and yellow portal appeared, this time facing the wall. Pietro, having neither stopped nor even slowed—indeed he hadn't even realized that anything had happened to him—ran headlong into the wall before he realized it was there.
"Oww…that had to hurt." Evasia winced as the albino mutant toppled backwards, his body leaving an imprint in the hangar's wall.
"Split up and attack!" Althea said as the Misfits charged again.
Xi headed straight for Evasia, who was holding a lead pipe in her hands. He stepped forward and brought out his wooden sword. He thrust at Evasia, only to have her nimbly step aside. He slashed at her head and she bent almost double to avoid it. Xi tried to kick Evasia's legs from under her, but she simply tucked her legs up and flipped over landing on her hands. With her bare foot she grabbed the metal pipe and held it in an attack position. Xi blinked.
Evasia snorted. "Is that all?" She was no ninja, but her superhuman reflexes and dexterity were nothing to be despised. She wielded the pipe with her foot at least as well as she did when she was holding it in her hand. Xi winced as she landed a blow on his arm.
"Careful, they're not as dumb as they look!" Althea warned as she and Lance cornered Forceflow. "Who are you? Magneto's goons?"
"As if." Forceflow sneered as he raised his hand and a pair of tanks were raised into the air and then were tossed at the Misfits.
"Scatter!" Althea ordered as the tanks just narrowly missed crushing them. "Lance, there's a water line underneath the ground!"
"Got it!" Lance said as he caused a tremor, cracking the floor and exposing the pipelines beneath it.
Althea concentrated and soon the pipe burst, releasing water all over the hangar floor. The Omegas leaped aboard wooden crates, apparently wary of stepping in the water.
For the hydrokinetic Althea however, she had no trouble getting a bit wet. "What's the matter? You afraid of the water?" She taunted as she raised herself into the air on a small wave of water.
"Of the water? No." Evasia replied. "Megawatt, now!" Rodriguez leaped onto one of the crates and lightning crackled from his fingertips, struck the waterspout Althea was standing on. And since water conducts electricity…
"AL!" Toad yelled as Althea was electrocuted. The waterspout dissipated and Althea fell to the ground. "YOURE TOAST!" Toad yelled at the Omegas. Toad darted his tongue out at Megawatt, who simply waited. Just as Toad's tongue was about to impact with Rodriguez's face, a silver cord shot out from the side and wrapped itself around Toad's tongue.
"Wha da fuff?" Toad asked as his tongue was immobilized.
"That would be my doing." Takashi said as he stepped out. "Call me Metatak." It was clear to the Misfits that it wasn't a cord or whip, but it Metatak's own arm, now a metallic liquid-looking tentacle appendage.
"Let go of him!" Fred barked as he picked himself up. "NOW!" Metatak shrugged.
"As you wish." He shrugged. Snapping his arm back, he yanked Toad forward by his tongue.
"Uh-oh." Toad gulped as he ended up sailing through the air to impact against the far end of the hangar. Hard. "Ooohhh." Toad groaned as he sank to the ground.
"I've had enough!" Fred roared as he rushed the Omegas again.
"Agreed." Forceflow said as he raised his hand. Fred took off like a rocket hitting the ceiling hard enough to make even someone with invulnerable skin hurt. "Blob go up." Forceflow grinned. "Blob go down." He lowered his hand and Fred was pushed back down to the ground with enough force to crack the floor.
"My turn!" Angelica said as she launched fire at the Hellions. Vortex raised her hand and opened a portal, swallowing the flame and opened another portal to return it to her owner. "Yikes!" Angelica said as she was nearly toasted by her own attack.
"Are you trying to barbecue us?" Lance asked her. "Let's rock!" He shouted as he floor started to shake under the feet of the Omegas, causing the wooden crates to topple over. They scattered.
"What's going on?" Shipwreck shouted as he and the other Misfit handlers ran into the increasingly wrecked hangar. "ALTHEA!" He exclaimed when he saw his daughter lying unconscious on the ground. Then he saw the Omegas, still in their Cobra uniforms, on the face of it, just ordinary ground troops. "YOU SNAKES ARE GOING TO PAY!" The enraged sailor bellowed as he opened fire on the Omegas.
"WAIT!" Wanda tried to warn him, but too late. Forceflow just waved his hand and the bullets bent around the Omegas before heading back towards the handlers.
"Duck!" Cover Girl yelled as she and the others hit the ground.
"They're mutants?" Low Light asked. "Fine. Two can play at this!" He said as he shifted into a brick creature and stomped over to the regrouping Omegas.
"Only problem is, we're not playing!" Low Light looked up to see another Cobra solider standing atop a tank, his hands glowing ominously red. It was Vladimir. Clenching his hands into fists, he fired off bolt after bolt of energy at Low Light.
Flakes of brick and mortar spun off Low Light as he was blasted again and again. He shifted to a solid steel form, but he was still being pummeled with energy. Finally, he toppled over, unconscious.
"LOW LIGHT!" Cover Girl shouted as she fired off a shot at Vladimir, who leaped off the tank and took cover.
"Forceflow, take care of the Joes!" He ordered.
"Anything you say, Red Nova." Jacques replied, calling Vladimir by his nom de guerre. Forceflow telekinetically lifted Cover Girl and the other Joes in the air and hurled them hard against the wall.
"AAAHH!" Shipwreck yowled as his arm gave a painful crack as it impacted against the wall. "MY ARM!"
"SHIPWRECK!" Wanda shouted. "THAT'S IT!" She growled furiously as she powered up her hex bolts.
"Uh-oh." Vladimir a.k.a. Red Nova swallowed as the Scarlet Witch reached her breaking point.
"Uh-oh." Evasia sweated.
"Ooops." Forceflow stated. With an enraged scream, Wanda fired. The Omegas ran and ducked behind whatever cover they could find.
"Now what?" Evasia shouted at Red Nova.
"We wait for Sidesplitter." He said. As if summoned, Phelan appeared next to them.
"Got it!" He told Red Nova gleefully, patting a folder he tucked under his arm. "The battle isn't going so well for Cobra. They're getting creamed."
"What a shock." Evasia muttered. "Should we go help?"
"Won't make a difference at this point." Red Nova said flatly. "Cobra wanted us to pin down the Misfits long enough for them to take a crack at GI Joe. If they couldn't handle things on their end, then that's just too damn bad. Besides," he yelled over the noise of the Scarlet Witch's attack. "Best to quit while we're ahead." Raising his voice he called to him comrades.
"WE HAVE WHAT WE CAME FOR, LET'S GO! VORTEX, GET US OUT OF HERE!"
"GOT IT!" Vortex yelled as she opened a portal. Megawatt, Metatak, and Vortex ran inside, followed by Sidesplitter, Forceflow and Evasia. Red Nova was the last to leave.
"THIS IS NOT OVER!" He yelled as he started to climb into the portal. He froze for a moment and then turned back. "Oh, I almost forgot. Happy Independence Day." Red Nova grinned as he raised his hands and blasted the ceiling of the hangar, causing rubble to come crashing down. Vladimir stepped into the portal and it closed after him.
A/N: Credit goes to RogueFanKC for coming up with the codenames Metatak (Takashi), Sideplitter (Phelan), and Evasia (Amira). Thank you so much!