Title: Sound And Fury

Authors: Sara And Lizzie

Rating: T for language, mild sex

Disclaimer: we don't own grey's anatomy, or any anatomies but our own at that.

Author's Note: Ok.. Set after Derek picks Addison and Meredith sleeps with George. Review. No matter how you feel about it, review. Chapters will get longer. We tried to step it up with our grammar, but we still suck. REVIEW, PLEASE. Check out 'A Little Something Called Forever' and 'The Best Laid Plans'. We need reviews to function, so help us out.

"We're too cool to be alone, but not too crazy to get busted." –Matchbox Twenty

Meredith and George were sitting on cots facing the vending machines, whittling away their shift in silence. Meredith didn't know what to say, and George didn't know what to ask.

It was 3:30 in the morning, and there were still too many hours left in the shift for this kind of silence.

"You're miserable, Mer." George said, breaking the silence.

"Gee, don't beat around the bush or anything George." Her voice was hollow and toneless.

"He's married, Meredith." George stressed.

"No kidding."

"Why are you doing this to yourself?"

"You already told me that, George." She said. He eyes her quizzically, disturbed by her lack of emotion. "That's love, Mer." Meredith quoted.

"You are in love with him." George said. It wasn't a question or an answer, but it was out in the open all the same.

Meredith smirked. "It sounds so simple." Her pager went off, and she looked at it, her expression a mix of anticipation and dread. She hopped off the cot and turned to face George. "I gotta go."

"You're going to him aren't you?" George asked.

"At this point, what does it even matter? I've got nowhere else to go."

Even as she was striding away, George had nothing to say.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Meredith sat up in the bed in the call room, fairly certain she had fallen asleep for awhile. She pulled on her underwear and Derek's grey t-shirt that he had been wearing under his scrubs.

She sat on the edge of the opposite bed, waiting for Derek to wake up, feeling utterly alone and hopeless. It didn't matter how perfect it felt to be with Derek. He would inevitably abandon her, even if not by choice.

He opened his eyes and sat up, smiling crookedly at her. "So there's my shirt."

Meredith smiled softly, sadly. This was it. The end of the road. She could feel it. "It looks better on me."

His grin broadened. "That it does."

He checked his watch. "4:45."

"What are you still doing here?" Meredith asked. "I might have to stay for another twenty seven hours, but at least you can go."

He sighed, confused. He ran a hand through his hand and looked her in the eye. "I ask myself that a lot, Mer."

That soft, melancholy smile graced her lips again. The end of their affair was imminent, and she knew it. He would go back to being married, and she would go back to being miserable. More miserable.

Unless she could stop it. She could say what she had always made a point of not saying. She could make that final, last ditch effort. He was pulling on his boxers, and his scrub pants.

"Derek, I need to tell you-" Before she could finish her sentence, the door swung open, and there, in the hallway, shaky on her legs, but looking strong, stood Addison Shepherd.

Meredith froze, her mind racing. She was wearing his t-shirt. And her underwear. Now she was a dirty mistress who'd been caught. Addison's jaw dropped. The file she was holding hit the floor, scattering papers everywhere.

"Oh my God." Addison breathed. Meredith met Derek's eyes, and expected him to look angry, but he was staring at her intensely, with an odd look on his face.

"Addison…" Meredith started. "This.."

Addison laughed bitterly. "Isn't what it looks like? Or is this why you did her surgery?"

Derek shook his head. "The surgery doesn't matter anymore, Addie."

"Do not call me Addie." She hissed. "Of course it matters, Derek! My life should matter! The chief's orders should matter. Meredith should not matter!"

"She would have died." Derek whispered, some vague part of his brain knowing he was only making things worse.

Meredith closed her eyes for while, and then opened them. "Addison, I swear, we never meant for this to happen."

"Of course not." Addison said. "I couldn't walk. How the hell would I catch you?" She shook her head at Meredith. "Just go."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cristina, George, Izzie and Alex were answering Bailey's page when they saw Meredith come out of an on-call room. Derek followed her.

"Mer, wait." He called out.

Addison stepped into the hallway. "Derek, if you leave now, you leave for good." Meredith winced. Derek turned around and looked at Addison for a long time. Then he turned back, and grabbed Meredith's wrist.

"I need to talk to you." He said, pulling her back.

"Are you crazy?" Meredith asked, suddenly realizing that Addison had just caught them. That Addison was going through something awful right now. "That was an ultimatum, Derek. She's your wife." Meredith glanced over his shoulder at Addison, finally understanding the expression if looks could kill.

"Look," Meredith said, "I understand what this was, and what it wasn't." She extracted her wrist from his grip and backed away.

"Meredith, stop!" he called.

"We can't do it like this." She said.

Derek threw his hands in the air. "We just did. Jesus, Meredith, I'm in love with you!" he shouted. She stopped moving.

"What?"

"I love you." He said. Addison closed her eyes.

"But, I thought…" she trailed off. It was silent in the hallway. The silence was broken by Bailey clearing her throat.

"Dr. Shepherd. Maybe you and Grey could take this outside. And make it damn snappy, because she needs to do rounds."

Derek nodded, and turned to Meredith. But she was already gone.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He found her on a bench outside the hospital. The sun was rising over Seattle when Derek sat down next to her. "Meredith." He said. "I meant it."

"You choose Addison."

"Because I had to. Meredith, please understand that if I hadn't tried with her, I wouldn't be able to tell you that I love you, and I want you and I want to be with you."

"You love me, Derek, or you love the way you feel with me?"

"I know my heart, Meredith."

"Look, Derek, you don't have to do this, okay? You have an out, and I won't hate you, hell, I'll even understand if you take it. You can go to Addison; you can tell her it was a mistake."

"No." Derek said forcibly. "I can't, because it wasn't a mistake. I don't want to take any of it back."

Meredith closed her eyes to keep from crying. Derek put a hand on her chin. "Meredith, look at me." He said gently. "I have always loved you. From day one, this whole time. It has been you."

She opened her eyes, and let the tears fall down her cheeks. "I don't know what to do." She said, letting him pull her into a hug. "I don't know where to go from here."