Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or Ultimate Spider-Man.

A/N: Here's a mass update of every story minus RWBY, sorry to those who wanted that but the Beta is still busy and I have got to the point where I need their help due to that story being their idea.

I hope you have a safe, Merry Christmas, Happy Haunika, Kwanza, or whatever holiday you celebrate and if you're reading this before/on New Year's Eve, I hope you have a safe and Happy New Year.

Beta: Jebest4781, and Chaos-PSD

Chapter XLIV: By The Numbers.

Last Time.

Later, Naruto's House.

Naruto closed the door and saw She-Hulk in one of his black shirts with the Konoha symbol on it and pink panties. "Hey, lover, took a nap, hope you don't mind?"

"Why would I mind? I just want to get into bed. I dealt with Deadpool today." Naruto asked, shrugging as she walked to him and bent down to kiss him before leaning up.

"Poor baby… You know, if this was the '90s I would be the one talking to the readers."

Naruto raised an eyebrow before shrugging and walked past her.

Smack!

And smacked her ass before walking up the stairs. "I'm going to bed."

Now.

New York, Avengers Tower.

Naruto was walking up the stairs of Avengers Tower going over a report on Spider-Man and his team battling the Green Goblin who was rather easily beaten by them and taken into custody by S.H.I.E.L.D. And when getting back to the Heli-Carrier, Spider-Man asked how they were going to help him, but Fury told him they were going to hold him on the S.H.I.E.L.D. moon base to protect the people of Earth until they can find a cure.

While they talked the Goblin releases a capsule containing the Venom symbiote from his mouth and it begins to spread. Spider-Man, not liking Fury's plan, talks to Doctor Octopus for help in curing Osborn. Naruto continues reading on how most of the S.H.I.E.L.D. personal turned into symbiotes. They attack Spider-Man, but he flees to find his Iron Spider Armor and goes on the attack and rescues Doc Ock.

The two then go to the lab to create an Anti-Venom, while Goblin bonds with the symbiote himself. They begin to create the Anti-Venom, as Doc Ock is shocked by Spider-Man's scientific abilities before the Venom/Goblin bursts in and attacks, so Spider-Man battles him while Ock finishes the formula. The formula is then released in a blue gas like cloud spreading through the Heli-Carrier and curing everyone one, and also returns Norman to his human form as Doc Ock gets away in an escape pod as the Venom symbiote is sucked out an airlock.

Naruto was then brought out of his thoughts as Black Widow pulled him into her room wearing leather pants and a white sleeveless shirt.

"Hey, beautiful." Naruto greeted before pulling her up by the ass to kiss her.

"Hmm. Hey, yourself." Natasha replied, pulling back as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

Her door closed as Naruto squeezed her ass before walking to her dresser and placed her on it to continue making out.

In the training room, Iron Man was standing beside Hawkeye who was holding on to a blue ball while a red one was under his arm and he kicked a yellow one up in his other hand.

"Ready to have your socks rocked off?" Hawkeye asked, looking to the others. "Those of you courteous enough to wear socks."

"Just play," Hulk growled out as he stomped the floor.

Hawkeye then threw/kicked each ball having the others dodge and jump out of the way before the ball hit Hulk in the face.

"Out." Iron Man said as Hulk snorted before walking to the end of the room.

Hawkeye then threw two balls past Falcon before Falcon smiled at the archer. "Way off, Hawkeye." He said before being hit in the head

"Out. And…" Iron Man trailed off and shot one ball as it headed towards Cap and had it pop and hit his leg. "Out. Again." He said faceplate coming up as Hawkeye laughed, spinning a ball on his finger.

"Bar none, the best training session. What is that, eight-zip?"

"(Growls)" Hulk growled as Falcon looked to Iron Man.

"Yeah. Is there a point to this?"

"I'm with Falcon." Captain America said as Naruto walked in putting his mask on. "This isn't the best team-building exercise you've ever come up with."

"What he said," Hulk said, popping a ball as Iron Man sighed.

"Well, that's because this isn't about team-building. It's about team-busting. When the Cabal hijacked my pre-play system, I had to put together an even better program to give us an edge. New data, algorithms, new everything." Iron Man explained having a screen come up with Captain America dodging the balls. And a program that predicted where he was going. "The Stark probability engine. It predicts a sure path to victory in any combat situation."

"There are no sure things in combat," Cap said, walking up to Iron Man. "You're forgetting the human factor."

"The human factor is there. It's just... insignificant. Statistically speaking." Iron Man replied with a shrug.

Cap just raised an eyebrow at that. "Insignificant?" He asked, cracking his neck. "Do it again. We've got a little surprise of our own."

Later, Iron Man looked to Hawkeye. "Activate the laser battle balls."

"With pleasure," Hawkeye said, jumping in Iron Man's cupped hands.

He then jumped up as metal balls with lasers on them fell from the ceiling. He then kicked them around as Cap looked at Hulk. "Sonic Shredder."

Hulk threw him up as Iron Man looked around. "Plant one at Cap's feet."

Hawkeye kicked one to Cap's foot as he landed, having the war hero fall and have the ball fly back to the archer. He then threw it at Falcon, having it hit his chest and break in half each piece hitting Hulk and Naruto.

"I hate this game." Hulk sighed out as Iron Man walked up.

"This is how we'll beat the Cabal. The probability engine is perfect. No more surprises." He said as a red blur crashed into Hulk and took him out of the tower and into several buildings.

Naruto looked out of the hole before glancing back to see Widow walking in, zipping her suit up flashing him quickly. "Um, I'm surprised. Anyone else?"

"Scanning." Iron Man said as he pulled the tapes up and froze the video to scan the blur. "Locked. Hyperion. Okay. To be fair, the probability engine was off." Iron Man said before he and Falcon flew off as the others got on their bikes or flying car. "Hyperion took Hulk to the river." Iron Man said as Thor joined them. "J.A.R.V.I.S., lock down the tower and scan all frequencies for the Cabal. Looks like we get to trash the Cabal ahead of schedule. Stark probability engine is active."

They went to the river and saw the Hulk was fighting Hyperion under the water as boats sailed over them. "Thor, boat." Iron Man said to the Asgardian as both went to the boats.

"Aye."

"Sir, there are no signs of the Cabal near the tower," J.A.R.V.I.S. said as Naruto looked over from his bike.

"They could be distracting us."

"I'm running the probability."

"Thor. Get down there and-"

Cap was then interrupted by Iron Man. "Hold on. S.P.E. says there's an 85% chance Attuma's waiting for an ambush." He said as Hawkeye, who was riding with Black Widow in her car looked over.

"S.P.E.?"

"Stark Probability Engine." Widow said to the archer

"Ah. He's all about the branding."

"Falcon. Funnel. Now." Iron Man said as Falcon flew to the bridge.

"Red-wing mode. Full thrust at 22 degrees."

His pack flew off and started to fly in a circle in the water creating a cyclone that pulled the water up revealing Attuma and a group of Atlanteans.

"Prepare to... Huh?"

"Nice try, Attuma," Naruto said as he and a group of clones dropped down each with a Rasengan (Spiraling Sphere) in hand before hitting the group. "Rasengan! (Spiraling Sphere!)"

Iron Man saw Hyperion come into the open circle. "Hyperion?"

He was then hit by Thor. "Aah!"

"Bye-Perion. Ha! 'Twas a good one, no?"

"Not good enough," Hyperion said as he stopped in mid-air. And was hit by an exploding arrow. "Aah!"

"Actually, it was pretty good for Thor. Comedy's like his third language." Hawkeye said as he stood in Widow's car. "Whoa!" He stopped and fell as Widow turned to dodge Hulk who jumped out of the water.

"I'm not through with you," Hulk yelled as he came up to Hyperion.

They traded punches as Hyperion flew higher up before hitting Hulk in his right bicep with his laser then punched the burn to drop him. "Aah!"

The Red Skull in a black version of Iron Man's armor came up on Hyperion's wrist gauntlet in a hologram. "Hyperion, disengage."

"Never."

"The numbers do not lie, Hyperion. There is a 75% certainty of your failure. Disengage." Skull said as Iron Man flew over.

"More like 87%, but who's counting?" He yelled, hitting Hyperion with his unibeam having Hyperion fly off into the clouds.

HYDRA Sub.

Underwater, Hyperion came inside a black sub and looked to see Red Skull standing and saw the HYDRA logo on his arc reactor.

"The numbers do not lie?" Hyperion asked furiously.

"They do not. But sometimes we do. A masterful performance, especially with the Hulk. The first domino falls." Skull said before looking back to Attuma, Dracula, and M.O.D.O.K's face in the Adaptoid's body.

Avengers Tower.

The Avengers stood in the briefing room with a micro HYDRA bot walking off Thor's boot. "Two minutes before Hyperion knocked in our front door, this happened…" Iron Man said, bringing up a screen showing ground in Death Valley that turned to glass and cracked. "A cosmic anomaly in Death Valley lasted just a few seconds. No one was hurt, but-"

"It turned the desert to glass," Falcon said, putting a metal brace on Hulk's arm. "The energy readings are off the charts."

"Readings we've seen before." Iron Man said bringing up the Tesseract Cube.

"The Tesseract?" Naruto without his mask asked, crossing his arms. "I thought you said that was secured?"

"The greatest power source in the known universe." Iron Man said ignoring the ninja before looking up. "Though we've never seen it do this. I think that the Cabal attacked to distract us."

Cap then took a step forward. "It was more than a distraction, Tony. They targeted Hulk. Until he heals-"

"(Roars!)"

He stopped as Hulk roared. "Hey. I'm workin' here." Falcon yelled at the Hulk who then stood.

"I can take a pretty boy in a cape any day, wing head," Hulk said before grabbing his arm. "Ow!"

"Debatable," Thor said to Hulk before looking at Iron Man. "We should not underestimate the Skull's cunning."

"We're not underestimating anyone. We're out-thinking them. Whatever the Cabal's up to, with the S.P.E., we can handle it."

Cap sighed at that before speaking. "Tony, we know you're the smartest guy on the continent, but there's more to what we do than probability." Suddenly, J.A.R.V.I.S. spoke up.

"Sir, S.H.I.E.L.D. satellites are detecting a spike in cosmic energy."

Iron Man then pulled up the world in front of him and had it spin. "Triangulate its position now, before we lose it again… There." He said before the room shook. "Huh?"

Naruto then pulled his mask on before seeing the Skull's sub fly out of the river.

"Fury is gonna be so jealous."

"Not once it's a pile of scrap, he won't." Iron Man said as Naruto looked back.

"Do you think their sudden departure seems a little… Convenient?" He asked as Widow saw the bot on Iron Man's computer outlet.

She then dropped in a crouch and aimed one of her stingers at it before shooting it. "Sneaky little Skull."

"They intercepted the coordinates of the Tesseract and had a head start. Move it or lose it, team."

They then went to a Quinjet and flew after with Falcon explaining he could fly ahead only for Iron Man to shoot the idea down saying the odds weren't in their favor. When pressed on him relying too much on the program, Iron Man sighed and explained that when Skull stole his armor, he also got files on them, including how they fight and any weaknesses.

Suddenly, the Adaptoid flew at them. "Adaptoid at 12 o'clock!" Naruto yelled from his seat.

"Brace for impact."

"S.P.E.'s got this."

"I hope."

The robot then created wings that sliced the jet in half having Thor and Hulk hold both sides together. Naruto then looked at Iron Man. "Your magic number engine didn't see that comin'?"

"Actually, it did. I didn't want Skull to know we were ready for it."

"We weren't ready for it, Tony," Cap yelled at Iron Man. "You've gotta let us do our jobs."

"Speaking of... Falcon, now you can go. Fly ahead. Try and secure the Tesseract." Falcon then dropped down the sliced hole and started flying forward.

"Hyperion's coming around. Is the plan to let him punch us to the Moon?" Widow asked to see Hyperion flying.

"Thought about it. But how about Thor handles him instead?"

"But the Aven-jet."

"Trust me. Hulk? Group hug."

"Oh, no."

Thor flew out and attacked Hyperion into the front of the sub before the Quinjet crashed into it and the Avengers jumped out to see the Cabal.

"Surprise! (Coughs)" Naruto yelled as he couched from the debris "Admit it. You didn't see that one coming."

Skull then turned to them. "Have you gone mad? You'll destroy us all!"

"You know as well as I do you can save us all with one order." Iron Man said before Skull put a monocle on his left eye and turned to M.O.D.O.K. who was beside him floating.

"M.O.D.O.K., deploy the Adaptoid."

The Adaptoid flew past M.O.D.O.K. and onto the front of the sub slowing their descent as Hawkeye shot an arrow at M.O.D.O.K. "Thanks."

"Sam, we still have one big bad guy unaccounted for. Probability says he's comin' to you." Iron Man said shooting Skull as Naruto fought the henchmen

"Roger, Tony. Coming up on the coordinates." Falcon said as they landed and everyone but Naruto, Widow, and Hawkeye jumped/flew out.

"Your game has improved considerably, Stark," Skull said, shooting a yellow beam at Iron Man. "But I wonder. Just what sacrifices you're willing to make?" Skull asked as Hulk punched Attuma out of the sub and threw a chunk of metal at him.

Inside, the trio of Avengers fought M.O.D.O.K by keeping him off balance with attacks and throwing weapons. "Keep hitting him. Don't let him use his mind Mojo."

"You think?"

Naruto kicked M.O.D.O.K. away before speaking through his comms. "We're stretched too thin, Tony."

"We're winning. Just stick with your partners."

"Tony. They're doin' a teleport swap."

"You said to stick with our partners, but they didn't stick with us."

"M.O.D.O.K. just blinked outta here," Hawkeye said as M.O.D.O.K. disappeared. "Tell me your probability whosi-whatsis saw this coming."

"Just stay on target."

"That's a 'no'."

They then saw a black portal cover the hall before groaning as Naruto picked a silver kunai.

"Listen up, Avengers. A few more seconds and we'll end this for good." Iron Man said over the comms before they heard Cap.

"Not sure we have those seconds. I'm getting my shield handed to me down here. You said you didn't want to make more mistakes. I think you're makin' one right now."

Naruto turned and attacked Dracula with his kunai before turning to the others. "RUN!"

Looking forward, he saw Skull now with glowing red skin and glowing armor as he held the Tesseract and easily fought Iron Man. "GO!"

Naruto pushed the vampire back as the two ran out and was attacked by the Adaptoid and taken to the others as a portal opened under Naruto and he fell with the others with Red Skull. Red Skull tried to attack, only to fall to the ground. "What's happening?"

"The Tesseract is unstable. If we are to keep it, we must contain it." M.O.D.O.K. said to Skull who regained his bearings and stood. "Stabilize it. You have no choice. Would you risk it all now for petty revenge?"

"If you leave them alive, they'll come after us. They're beaten. Not broken." Hyperion asked as he hovered above the group.

Red Skull just smirked. "And now you'll see the lesson that I have learned, which your fragile ego has not. Better to create the odds than to play them." He said before two missiles launched in the air. "Two missiles. Los Angeles, Las Vegas. Which city will you save? Or will you let both perish to follow us?" Skull finished as the Cabal left.

"Cap, I... I messed up bad." Iron Man said from his spot.

"Save it. What can those missiles do?"

"Normally, they wouldn't even scratch the Hulk. But augmented by cosmic energy… I... I don't know what to do. By my calculations, we can only save one."

"And that's why you have a team," Naruto said, pocketing his kunai. "For the one time when the guy with all the answers doesn't have the answer."

"Two teams. Power, speed, and skill evenly split." Cap said to the group. "You, Thor, Hawkeye, and the Widow on one. I'll take Falcon, Shinobi, and Hulk."

"Those missiles are shielded. They have the latest evasion software. They were some of my best stuff." Iron Man said to Cap who shook his head.

"We are your best stuff."

"Well, then... Avengers, assemble!"

Each team went after a missile as Cap came up with a plan for them to each attack the missile at once with their powers/weapons. Falcon threw his feathers as Naruto threw kunai, Hulk without his brace slapped his hands together as Cap launched himself at the missile blowing it up. The other team used Iron Man's unibeam after Thor powered his suit up to just over 300%.

Later, Avengers Tower.

"Any sign of the Tesseract?" Cap without his cowl down asked Tony who was looking at the footage.

"No. Skull's smart enough to have it shielded. We won't know where it is until he comes knocking with it. You know this is bad."

"Tony, we can handle 'bad'. We're not numbers.

"Yeah," Tony said before turning the footage off. "We're Avengers."

To Be Continued.

A/N: Thanks for reading and let me know of any mistakes.

Beta: Jebest44781, and Chaos-PSD.

Here's a mass update of every story minus RWBY, sorry to those who wanted that but the Beta is still busy and have got to the point where I need their help due to that story being their idea.

I hope you have a safe, Merry Christmas, Happy Haunika, Kwanza, or whatever holiday you celebrate and if you're reading this before/on New Year's Eve, I hope you have a safe and Happy New Year.

Nothing else to say.

Talk To You Later,

Lone Wolf Out.