full summary: A candy threatening weirdo, a rich heartthrob, a pink haired sweetie, a "I want every one to say I'm pretty or suffer girl", a shy peaceful girl, a kick-ass weapon master, a "this is your fate so deal with it" dude, and a WIZARD? Join the gang as they do the weirdest things ever! SasuSaku NaruHina ShikaIno NejiTen
disclaimer: I own nothing.
Last time in High School Of Weirdos:
Tenten pulled out a roll of tape and a bottle of super glue
"WHA...WHAT NO PLEASE!" begged Shikamaru.
It was too late...
"High School Of Weirdos"
By:LimeQuartz
Gym/Front Stage:
"Get set! You're on in 5!" yelled Asuma, as he disappeared backstage.
"You heard the man, so, get set! You're on in 5!'' repeated Tenten.
Suddenly, Lee appeared out of no where...
"Tenten, did you see Sakura?" he asked, quickly.
"Nope, I think she's practicing her lines somewher-" said Tenten, trailing off as she countinued going over her clipboard of information.
"Is she with Sasuke?" demanded Lee.
"No, I don't think so..." she answered, as she casually crossed out a name on the list.
"Excellent..." said Lee, grinning evilly intertwining his fingers, like Mr. Burns in the Simpson.
"What did you say?" asked Tenten, looking up from the clipboard. She wasn't exactly paying much attention the entire time thanks, to the clipboard of 'POWA'.
"I said doughnuts! I'll go get some doughnuts!" said Lee, as he made his way towards the gym's backstage.
"Get mine with extra chocolate! Lots of chocolateeeeeeeee! And don't forget the coffee! Lots of coffeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Tenten screamed, after the Lee, who was fleeing promptly due to intense fear.
"Like you need any..." muttered Neji, who happened to be in the wrong place, at the wrong time.
Tenten took out her handy, dandy, bottle of super glue and tape and waved it threateningly in front of her boyfriend.
"What did you just say Neji?" asked Tenten.
"I said..." began Neji.
Neji looked behind Tenten, only to see Naruto pretending to choke himself. When Neji sent the blonde an irritated glare Naruto began and making an "x" with his arms telling Neji not to repeat his statement.
"Well, are you going to say it?" asked Tenten, who was oblivious to the fact that Naruto, was behind her.
"I said..." began Neji, again.
Neji glanced behind Tenten once more out of pure curiosity to see Naruto, shaking his head furiously. Naruto then ran into the girl's change room...
"Like I was saying before a stupid idiot was bothering me, you..." He was interrupted as he heard some dramatic screams...
"NARUTO YOU PERVERT!"
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THE GIRL'S CHANGEROOM?"
"AHA! I KNEW YOU WERE A GIRL!"
"-MRPH- Save –MRPH- Me –MRPH- You –MRPH- Troublesome –MRPH- TROUBLESOME IDIOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!"
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
"AHHHHHHHHHHH-"
"SHUT UP ALREADY!"
"MY SHOELACE IS UNTIED, THOUGH!"
"SO?"
"I DON'T KNOW HOW TO TIE THEM!"
"….."
"SHIKAMARU HOLD ON BUDDY!"
"HIT HIM WITH YOUR BRA!"
"EXCUSE-ME?"
"NO, NOT THAT!"
"DUCKKKKKKKKK!"
"WHERE?"
"DRAMA SENSES TINGLING!"
"QUACK! QUACK!"
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
After a bunch of ramblings and violence Naruto emerged out of the girl's change room ALIVE! With a beaten up Shikamaru because he used him as a human shield...
"-MRPH- Finally -MRPH- You –MRPH- Troublesome idiot!" screamed Shikamaru, spitting out the glue that once held his mouth together.
"Hey, there's still tape on your mouth." yelled Naruto. He automatically, carelessly and swiftly pulled the tape off without even thinking.
"OW! YOU IDIOT!" screamed Shikamaru.
"At least you won't have to shave anymore..." said Naruto, very lamely. Neji, who was watching the entire fiasco, was very, VERY freaked out, and who would blame him? His girlfriend was undeniable creepy...
"Yeah, well like I was saying Neji, you shouldn't get Tenten mad or you'll end up like Shikamaru here," said Naruto, scratching the back of his head nervously.
Shikamaru nodded his head, he had learned his lesson.
"Well, Neji didn't you want to say something?" asked Tenten.
Everyone turned around to find Neji was gone.
Without a trace...
Backstage:
"Uchiha Sasuke" said Jin.
"Someone I don't want to know" greeted Sasuke.
"I'm ashamed in you..."
Sasuke gave Jin a confused look.
"Heh, idiot" muttered Jin.
He took out a pocket knife and cut a nearby rope causing a bag of flour to hit Sasuke knocking him unconscious.
"HA HA! I knew cooking class would be helpful one day" screamed Jin.
Jin looked down at the unconscious Sasuke and smirked.
"Well, the show must go on...and who better to play your role than me?" Jin asked himself, like a complete psychopath.
"Sakura will be mine..." thought Jin evilly.
(Evil theme song begins to play)
"MU HA HA HA HA! MU HA HA HA HA HA! COUGH! COUGH! NO I'm allergic to flour! AHHHHHHHH!" screamed Jin, running around in circles.
"Keep it down" said Sakura, from some unknown place.
"Oh no Sakura's coming! Better hide the evidence..." thought Jin.
"But how...?"
Somewhere random:
Kankuro was walking by until he saw the most beautiful thing ever...
"Could it be?" thought Kankuro curiously.
Yes, there in the opened janitors' closet was a broom!
"It's so beautiful!" cried Kankuro, as he started sweeping the hallways with the broom.
"Finally, a broom that hasn't been broken by that maniac Gai something!" cried Kankuro.
Kankuro was walking backstage until he spotted...IT!
Yes IT! IT was a...
MESS!
Finally, his time to SHINE!
Kankuro looked around backstage and saw a panicking, coughing, laughing maniac, Jin who was trying to pull Sasuke into the closet. Since everyone was in the front nobody knew what Jin was doing...weird...
"Hey, crazy-freak-I-don't-want-to-know, do you need help?" asked Kankuro riding his broom to Jin "Harry Potter" style.
"Yes! Wait...how much do I have to pay you?" asked Jin suspiciously. Free help doesn't come these days unless you ask Gai-sensei... freaky
"10 dollars an hour!" said Kankuro, proudly.
"How about 10 acorns an hour?" asked Jin.
"DEAL!" yelled Kankuro. Jin stood in his spot and watched in awe as Kankuro started sweeping away the flour for acorns...
"Now, what should I do about Sasuke?" thought Jin.
(Light bulb appears on top of Jin's head and burns him in the process)
"Ow," muttered Jin rubbing his head due to the imaginary light bulb. "I got an idea!" exclaimed Jin, surprised at himself for actually having some form of a plan.
He then took out a marker and drew on Sasuke's face (or he thought he did…)
He then stood back and admired his work...
Sasuke was now unrecognizable...
He looked like...
(Dramatic music)
HIMSELF?
"Damn it. I'm allergic to marker! No matter, I will have Sakura!" cried Jin, as he threw the marker behind his back hitting Kankuro's head in the process.
"AHHHHHHHH! UFO! They've come for my intelligent brain!" screamed Kankuro, as he felt the impact of the marker collide with his head. Jin sweat dropped as Kankuro paused in the middle of his ramblings and took notice of the marker.
"Hahaha…I was just practicing for my secret play…yeah that's all…" muttered Kankuro lamely. After the "UFO" crisis was solved, Jin dragged Sasuke to the janitor's closet and left him there with the help of Kankuro.
"HAHAHA! Let the show begin!" yelled Jin.
"Where are my acorns?" screamed Kankuro.
"Hahaha... a squirrel ate them, deal with it" said Jin, lamely as he ran away.
"NOOOOOOOOOO! DAMN YOU SQUIRRELS!" sobbed Kankuro.
Gym/ Front stage:
"Asuma-sensei!" yelled Tenten.
"What is it?" he asked.
"Well, Sasuke's missing...what should we do?"
"Hmm..."
10 MINUTES LATER...
"Asuma-sensei?" asked Tenten.
"WHAT? WHO THE HELL ARE YOU? Ohh, it's you Tenten."
Tenten sweat dropped, "Yeah, I said Sasuke's missing, what should we do?"
"Hmm..."
At that exact moment Jin happened to walk by.
"Jin! You will replace Sasuke! Deal with it!" said Asuma.
"Who me?" asked Jin lamely.
Why didn't he seem surprised...?
"Yes you! Do you see any other weirdos here?" asked Asuma.
SILENCE...
"I forgot you're all weirdos! Anyways, Tenten your problem is solved" said Asuma.
"WHAT! THAT CREEP CAN'T KISS SAKURA! WE ALREADY PRACTICED IT 50 TIMES WITH SASUKE ALREADY!" screamed Tenten.
"Actually, it was 64 times Tenten. Trust me I counted! I also relished every time the bastard got a slap in the face..."
Everyone stared at Naruto.
"DAMN YOU PEOPLE! DIDN'T ANYONE EVER TEACH YOU IT'S NOT NICE TO STARE!" cried Naruto, who began sobbing in a corner.
"Well, let the play begin!"
Everyone groaned when they saw the comment's owner...
Hatake Kakashi a.k.a MR.I-WANT PEVERTISM! NOW!
The play:
"Ahem! Ladies and Gentlemen hope you enjoy our beloved play called 'High School Of Weirdos'!
"ARE YOU CALLING US LADIES?" screamed Kakashi and Asuma.
Tenten sweat dropped. "Um, of course not, I just forgot that Kurenai-sensei couldn't come... yeah that's it!"
The two teachers dumbly nodded, sat down, and urged her to countinue.
"Okay, for sound effects we have Neji and Lee, and our stars are Shino, Sasuke, Sakura, Naruto, Hinata, Shikamaru and Ino. During this play I, Tenten, will be the narrator! Let the play begin!"
The curtains opened...
"Shikamaru!"
"Damn, not another fan girl" he mumbled, as Ino jumped onto him.
"Nara Shikamaru, he may seem like a dork but he's actually a playboy..." began Tenten.
"Yes, I, Nara Shikamaru am a playboy" he confessed lamely, as he began flirting with Ino.
"Shikamaru!"
The lazy teenager sighed inwardly, cursing, as Sakura and Ino began to fight over him.
"Each day and night Shikamaru was fought over by Sakura and Ino until..."
"I, Shino, the matchmaker will solve this!" exclaimed the matchmaker, with enthusiasm.
"Great Shino the matchmaker! I beg you! Please help!" said Shikamaru, dramatically.
"You two girls! I shall flip a coin and who ever guesses right will get this dork as their beloved boyfriend!" said Shino with his glasses flashing. The two girls nodded.
"Why am I the dork?" muttered Shikamaru.
"Heads or tails?" he asked Ino.
"Tails" she said, confidently. Shino flipped the coin...It landed on...
HEADS?
"Ahem..." Tenten sweat dropped, as she watched Shino, flipped the coin over and began to whistle, innocently.
"Why, would you look at that its tails!" yelled Shino, lamely. Asuma and Kakashi also sweat dropped...
"Oh no! Who am I going to date now?" asked Sakura lamely.
"Hm...How about you date...SASUKE!" shouted Shino, pointing to his left. Everybody turned their heads to Shino's left…no one was there…
"Ahem! Sakura decided to follow Shino's advice and date SASUKE!" repeated, as she shouted Sasuke's name abnormally loud. Jin appeared on the stage at that moment.
Sakura gave an angry glare at Tenten demanding an explanation, but Tenten just shrugged also confused.
"After years of dating SASUKE decided to propose to Sakura'' said Tenten as she once again yelled Sasuke.
"Sakura will you marry me?'' asked Jin.
"Um...'"
Everyone stared at her.
"I...I will," muttered Sakura.
He leaned down to kiss her when a powerful impact met his cheek once again.
"Don't touch my women, idiot" snapped Sasuke.
"SASUKE!" everyone screamed, in surprise.
"Sa...Sasuke? HEY WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'M YOUR WOMEN? OMG Dè já vu?" screamed Sakura.
Kakashi and Asuma never expected this...
"So beautiful and stupid" said Kakashi, as he whipped away his happy tears. Asuma nodded as he also whipped away his tears and handed Kakashi a handkerchief.
"Sakura, will you marry me?" asked Sasuke.
"YES!" screamed Sakura, as she latched herself onto him.
He kissed her and she kissed him back.
"NOW LEE!" screamed Neji backstage, flailing his arms frantically. Rock Lee whipped away his tears of sorrow as he and Neji begin doing wind effects.
"WHOOOSH! WHOOOSH!" they both screamed.
Everyone sweat dropped...Way to ruin the mood…
"YOU IDIOTS! WRONG SCENE!" hissed Tenten loud enough for only backstage to hear.
"WHOOOSH! WHOOSH!" continued Lee, oblivious to Tenten's angry words until he felt someone punch his head.
"Ow! Neji? What was that for?"
"For being an idiot…"
"Ahem, that very same day Naruto decided to propose to Hinata."
Suddenly, Naruto ran on stage panicking.
"HINATA FAINTED! LET'S JUST PRETEND SHE SAID YES..." said Naruto.
"IDIOT!" screamed Tenten, as she kicked Naruto off-stage.
"Ahem, that very same day Shikamaru decided to propose to Ino."
"Ino will you marry me you troublesome women?" asked Shikamaru, lazily.
"OF COURSE!" yelled Ino.
"Everything was perfect until LEEana discovered this.''
Suddenly Lee, I mean LEEana (who was wearing a wig and dress…) appeared holding a sniper (which is not real...) and aimed it at Shikamaru.
"If I can't have you no one can!" shouted Lee in a girly voice.
THAT IS SOOOOO WRONG ON SO MANY LEVELS...
BANG!
There was smoke everywhere...once it began to clear Shikamaru was on the floor with Ino beside him.
"Shikamaru! Why did you have to die?" cried Ino dramatically.
Shikamaru's eyes opened, ''Because it's part of the script...''
Tenten slapped her forehead in anger but she decided to let it slide.
"Well this is the end of-"
"WAIT A MINUTE! WHAT ABOUT THAT BITCH SLAP SCENE I SUFFERED SO MUCH FOR?" screamed Sasuke, angrily.
SILENCE...
"Hahaha...'' laughed Tenten nervously. She sent Sasuke an obtrusive death glare for interrupting her and countinued, ignoring the really pissed Uchiha behind her who was being restrained by Sakura.
So yes, this is the end of 'High School Of Weirdos'! Sasuke married Sakura, Naruto and Hinata, Shikamaru with Ino and Shino with um...LEEana!'' yelled Tenten.
Shino gave Tenten a death glare.
"Alright, alright. Shino remained happy and single''
Shino's glasses flashed brilliantly and he gave the audience 2 thumbs up. Everyone (except Jin, since he's unconscious) bowed as the curtains closed. The Naruto gang had a little trouble closing the curtains since Jin was lying in the middle of the stage...but they managed.
"THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL!" screamed Kakashi clapping his hands together like a maniac while a creepy grin was plastered on his face.
"Who would've expected such drama, comedy, romance, humour and dumbness all in one play?" asked Asuma. "A PLUS, PLUS!" exclaimed Asuma and Kakashi. They then began jumping up and down.
Yes, what a strange day indeed...
Next time in High School Of Weirdos:
"NO! Luke I am your father!" screamed Darth Vader, appearing out of no where with his cape flying from the air conditioning.
"I'm not Luke, I'm Naruto!"
"SHUT UP! FROM NOW ON YOU SHALL BE LUKE! YOU ARE MY SON!" screamed Darth Vader as he pulled out a light saber. At that exact moment the cashier hit Vader with the baseball bat.
OUCH…