*Picks up from the last chapter*
Jordan- 13
"Don't tell Voight what". Hank said angrily.
Adam had slowly turned around to see a furious Hank. Oh shit. He had to come up with something and quick.
"Hey Sarge, what I didn't want him to tell you was how great you look. You don't look a day over 50". Adam says, hoping to convince him.
The same glare on his face and it only intensified when he didn't see his daughter. "Where's Jordan?"
"In the bathroom".
"Ruzek don't make me ask again because if I do, thing won't be good for you".
Taking a deep breath Adam answered his boss. "I may or may have not lost Jo".
"You lost my daughter?! I swear how hard is it to watch a thirteen year old?!"
"Well when you put it that way".
When the glare on Hank's face increased that told the young detective to stop talking and joking. Taking a deep breath he went on.
"I was watching her, she flipped out".
"What happened".
"We were waiting on our food when someone walked in, when Jo saw him she freaked and ran out".
"What'd the guy look like?"
"He had brown hair, green eyes, and wore a suit. I think she thought it was Yates".
Hank sighed sadly, now he knew why his daughter ran away. Pulling out his radio he began talking into it. "This is Sergeant Hank Voight, I need an Amber Alert out on thirteen year old, Jordan Voight. She was last seen on Michigan Ave".
"Copy Sergeant".
"Sarge you think Jo could have gotten far?" Adam asked.
"Let's hope not".
Jordan was still running as fast as her legs would take her, after running for nearly twenty minutes her legs finally gave on her. The teen dipped into an alleyway, she was trying to control her breathing her mind still in attack mode she ended up picking up a metal pipe and began walking around with it. She began swinging it at random things, she ended up dropping the pipe as her eyes landed on a 2x4. A crowd of people began looking at her and a few of them ended up calling 911.
A short time later Gabby and Brett had arrived to the scene, they worked their way through the crowd. As soon as the teen turned facing their direction Gabby had stopped her partner.
"What's wrong?" Brett asked.
"Antonio said that Jordan's been having episodes the past few weeks, he also said she's gotten violent during the episodes. We have to approach this very carefully". Gabby replies.
"Should we call them?"
"You call, I'll try to talk to Jo".
"Go for it".
Brett then got on the phone with Antonio while Gabby slowly and carefully approached Jordan. The teen held the 2x4 in her hand as if her life depended on it when she saw someone getting close to her she brought it back close as if she was ready to swing. Putting her hands up in defense Gabby had stopped.
"Jo it's alright sweetheart you're ok, can you put that down for me please". Gabby said gently.
The thirteen year old shook her head frantically, her face had a mixture of anger, fear, terror, and sadness painted on. She gripped the board tightly.
"Were calling your dad he's on his way".
That had caused Jordan to drop some of her guard but not all of it, she still had a good grip on the board.
"Do you think you could put that down please".
Again she shook her head, bending down Jordan wrote something down on the paper and kicked it over to Gabby. The paramedic read the note. 'He's coming back for me. I won't let him get me again'.
"Who sweetheart? Who's coming back for you?"
She slid the notebook back to the teen and she quickly wrote down a name kicking it back over. 'Yates. He's coming back for me, I won't let him get me'.
Her heart broke, everyone at 51 had heard about what happened to Jordan and what Yates had done to her. Hank tried to drop her off there but that only caused her to have a melt down. Gabby looked at her with a saddened look.
"Sweetie he can't get you anymore ok, he's gone. Nobody's gonna hurt you again. I promise. Wanna come hop in the ambo with me and Sylvie?"
Again she shook her head while Gabby tried to talk down Jordan, Brett was waiting for the others to show up and a moment later two cars came speeding down. They had to be cautious so they didn't have the lights or sirens on, that would probably freak the teen out more. Antonio, Kevin, Jay, Erin, and Alvin had shown up. They all made sure Jordan couldn't see them.
"Where is she?" Alvin asked.
"Gabby's trying to talk her down, she has a 2x4 she won't put down". Brett told them.
"What if one of us goes from the back and gets her that way". Kevin suggested.
"I don't know, Jo's been getting very violent and during each episode it's gotten worse. If we move in from the back with her still holding that 2x4 who know what'll happen". Antonio spoke.
"We need to call Voight. Maybe he could help". Jay suggested.
Erin looked over to Alvin. "Al what do you wanna do?"
"Me, you, and Antonio will try and talk her down, Kevin, you and Jay go around to see if you can try and get the board from her without hurting her". Alvin told the others.
"Let's go". Erin said.
Jay and Kevin had gone around without getting spotted, while Erin, Alvin, and Antonio slowly carefully approaching the teen. All three of them raised their hands in defense, Gabby looked back to see her brother and his partners.
"Where's Hank?" Gabby asked.
"Were getting him here". Antonio answered.
"What's going on". Erin spoke next.
"Jo thinks Yates is coming back for her, she wrote he won't get me again".
"I'll go in first". Alvin said.
The older man then carefully approached his goddaughter, Jordan was still in attack mode when she saw her godfather she gripped the board tightly again and brought it up ready to swing. Alvin then stopped as he brought his hands up.
"Jo, it's ok now sweetheart you're safe now. Nobody's gonna hurt you again. I promise, let's put that down sweetie". Alvin used a gentle tone with her.
Jordan shook her head then pointed to her notebook, Alvin saw the notebook on the ground and read what she wrote. He was furious but didn't let it show, if he could he'd bring Yates back to kill the bastard himself.
"Honey, I need you to listen to me Yates can't hurt you anymore he's gone. Erin got him he's not coming back".
"It's true Jordy, I took him out he's not coming back. He's gone for good I promise". Erin said with a soft voice.
It broke their hearts when Jordan flinched at Erin's nickname, Erin looked heart broken when her sister flinched. What else had the sick bastard done to her?
"We only wanna help you sweetie, that's what we're here for to help you. We're not gonna hurt you. We won't let nobody hurt you ever again". Antonio spoke next.
The teen was now starting to feel emotional, her mind was still in attack mode but she started to feel herself getting pulled away from it. She still held the 2x4 in a death grip. Getting down on the ground she wrote something, every stayed back so they wouldn't freak her out more. After writing she kicked it back.
Antonio had picked it up and they gathered to read it, 'He's coming back for me! I won't let him get me! I won't let him get my dad either'.
Alvin saw how Kevin and Jay were carefully approaching the teen from behind, Erin then looked over at her sister.
"Jo, he can't get you, you're dad, or anybody else ever again we promise. Were not lying. Yates is dead. He can't hurt anyone anymore". Erin tells her.
The teen had kept pacing frantically she was feeling very conflicted the whole time, part of her tried to believe them but the part of her was still convinced Yates was coming back. Antonio saw that his friends were close by the teen he nodded giving them the signal to get the teen.
The two detectives continued to carefully move towards the teen, Jay was the one to grab the board which made her jump in fear she then fought for the board. A nail had ended up cutting the palm of her right hand. Kevin then wrapped the teen in a bear hug that made her fight more, Jordan began ramming her elbows into his ribcage repeatedly.
As they kept fighting the teen they had to be cautious of the board. The others watched on in fear, none if them wanted Jay, Kevin, or Jordan to get hurt.
"Careful not to hurt her guys". Antonio said.
" We're trying to make sure she doesn't hurt us". Kevin replies struggling.
All the teen heard was 'hurt her' which made her fight even more. During the struggle the board had hit Jay, a nail had cut his cheek.
"Jo calm down honey, it's alright. Nobody's trying to hurt you". Jay tells her softly.
Jordan wouldn't listen she kept fighting out of Kevin's hold, she ended up kicking him and she kicked him in the groin area hard making him fall to his knees and released the teen.
Once she was free the teen dropped the board and she ran only for Antonio to catch her. All the teen did was shake her head frantically, her face was covered in sweat and tears.
"It's ok Jo, nobody's gonna hurt you. We're right here. You're safe sweetheart". Antonio soothes her.
A couple seconds later Hank and Adam had arrived, the older father saw his little girl and immediately ran to her. Adam saw his friend on the ground holding his groin he then looked to Jay to see the cut on his cheek.
Jordan saw her father from Antonio's hold she let go of him and ran to her father not caring that blood is still dripping from her palm. Hank held onto his little girl, he was able to breath again. His baby was safe. The teen sobbed quietly in her father's neck as he soothed her.
"Shh everything's alright now baby, it's ok you're ok. You're safe Jo, daddy's here you're alright". Hank soothes her.
Adam saw that his friend was still on the ground and went over to him, it took Adam and Jay to help the detective stand up.
"What the hell happened to you". Adam says to his partner.
"Jo...kicked me...in the balls". Kevin answered hissing in pain.
"Ouch".
"Who taught her how to fight?"
"Jo's been taking karate and other martial arts since she was 7, maybe 8. Plus Justin taught her how to fight". Erin answered.
"I've been showing her how to box". Antonio chimes in
Kevin looked up to his friend, "Why the hell would you do that?"
The senior detective then shrugged. "Voight said it was ok".
Hank saw something dripping from his daughter's palm and saw it covered in blood. "Let's get you're hand cleaned and wrapped sweetheart".
Jordan ran back to grab her notebook picking it up with her good hand, Gabby was cleaning the blood and scar on the teen's palm while Brett tended to Jay's cheek.
"It's not too deep no stitches, you'll be fine". Brett tells the detective.
"Thanks Brett". Jay said.
The teen was by her father's side as Gabby was now wrapping her palm, slowly the adrenaline was leaving her body, now she was feeling the stinging pain in her hand. After her hand was wrapped she then wrapped herself around her father, her head rested against his shirt. Hank then rubbed her head he looked up at the sky silently thanking Anna that their little girl was safe and alright. This was killing him more than anything.
Hank missed his little girl's sweet voice and laughter, when Jordan laughed she sounded just like her mother. The past few weeks when the teen wouldn't talk, laugh or joke the older father felt himself slowly breaking. He felt like a failure because he couldn't help his little girl, he's tried everything he could possibly think of and none of it worked the most he could do at that point was give her the time and space she needed to work it out on her own. He needed to talk to someone about it, someone who wasn't on the team. The older father gently pulled his precious little girl away from him bending down to her level, he gave her a gentle look as he brushed her hair back.
"Jo, I have to go run an errand. You think you'll be ok with the others till I get back?" Hank asked gently.
Her eyes widened as she opened her book and wrote. 'Where are you going?'
"I have to go see somebody, I won't be long at all. You think you'll be ok with the others till I get back?"
Jordan wrote again, 'Promise you'll come back?'
"I promise sweetheart".
Closing her eyes tightly she nodded telling him it was ok to go, everyone saw the painful look on her face. What had Yates done to break her like this? They all knew that if Jordan was upset or scared she'd be over it in a few days but this was different. Yates had tricked her into leaving the District, he kept her tied up and locked in a trunk majority of the time, she witnessed someone getting shot to death in front of her. But there was more to it and the only person who knew it was Jordan.
Hank kissed his daughter's head and looked back at her, "I'll see you back at the District. I promise".
The teen nodded and watched as her father left, she watched as his SUV drove away. Part of her wanted to chase after him but the other part of her didn't. The only thing she was sure of was she wanted to be her normal self again but she didn't know how to do that. Looking down she started to think, would she ever be normal again? How could she go back to her normal self? Glancing back to the others she went beside Alvin and stayed close to her godfather, since her father had left Alvin was the closest to being a father figure to her. The older detective placed a gentle hand on his goddaughter's shoulder.
"It's alright sweetie, you're safe". Alvin tells her gently.
She opened her notebook and wrote then showed it to him, the note read. 'Can we go back to the District? Please'
"Sure let's go. Ruzek let's go".
"Comin Al". Adam says, going with his partner.
They left heading back to the District while the others stayed behind.
"We need to get Jo to talk". Antonio spoke first.
"She won't trust me, whenever she's upset, scared, anything, she won't talk". Erin replies.
"It's been weeks". Kevin said.
"You don't know what she went through, you don't know what Yates did to her or put her through. All we can do is give her time and space so she can figure it out on her own when she's ready she'll talk". Erin's voice was sharp and forceful.
"Erin calm down". Jay tells his partner.
"Look we all wanna help Jo but we can't help her until we know what's really going on, we don't know what Yates did or said to her and until we know what can we do? We can be there for her try to get her to regain our trust. The most we can do is give her time and space until she's ready". Antonio told everyone.
"Why get violent though? I've never seen Jo act like that before". Kevin says.
"She thought we were going to hurt her. Her mind was in attack mode". Jay said quietly.
Jay knew what it was like to have PTSD and to go through what Jordan's going through, the endless nightmares, the violent attacks, fighting with yourself day in and day out, not knowing what to do half the time, debating who to trust, the battle was long and hard the only way to win it was to talk about it and hopefully that'll help the teen to move on but until she starts talking there's nothing much they can do except be there for her.
Jordan rode in the back of her godfather's car with Alvin and Adam in the front, she tried to open her mouth but quickly closed it. She leaned against the door her head resting against the cool window, looking up at the sky she saw how dark the clouds were getting. After a few minutes the teen was slowly falling asleep, the attack and the car ride was tiring her out soon enough she was fast asleep. Alvin glanced in the rear view mirror to see his goddaughter fast asleep he kept on driving. Adam looked over to his partner then glanced out his window.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have taken Jo out knowing something like this might happen. I thought it be ok. I thought I could handle it I thought she could handle it". Adam says.
"Did you really think it wouldn't get back to Hank?" Alvin asked.
"How'd he find out?"
"Trudy texted him saying you took Jo out, he called Mouse and pinged her phone".
"I thought maybe I could get her to talk, when she ran out like that and I lost her. I chased after her till I lost her, when I couldn't find her a lot went through my head".
"Next time just check to see if it's ok to bring her out, a lot worse could have happened today".
Adam glanced back at the sleeping teen. "You're right".
Meanwhile
Hank was on his way to Med, he needed to talk to Dr. Charles. He wanted to find out a way to help his little girl. This sitting by, giving her the time and space to handle on her own wasn't working with him anymore. He arrived there heading inside Maggie had seen him and went over to him.
"Hank, everything ok? Is Jordan alright?" Maggie asked.
"She's the same, is Dr. Charles around?" Hank replied.
"I'll page him for you".
"Thanks Maggie".
The head nurse went to page the psychiatrist just then Sharon passed by and seen her friend, going over to him she hugged him.
"How are you Hank". Sharon said.
"I'm good Sharon". Hank answers.
"I heard about Jordan, how is she?"
"The same, not talking. She hasn't said a word since that night".
"If either of you need help don't hesitate to ask".
"Thank you Sharon".
A second later Dr. Charles had arrived, Sharon then left leaving the two men alone. The two men shook hand.
"Hank, what can I do for you". Dr. Charles said.
"You have a second to talk". Hank replied.
"Of course".
The two headed to the cafeteria and sat down, Hank sipped on some hot coffee he then held the small cup in his hands. The psychiatrist looked over to the older Sergeant and had a feeling on why he was there.
"Everything ok Hank".
"Doc there has to be something I can do to help Jordan. Anything I can. This is killing me more than anything. She barely eats, she barely sleeps if she sleeps at all she wakes up from a nightmare, she won't go to school, she won't leave my side for more than a couple minutes. Jordan panics when I tell her I have to leave".
"As I said before, her sense of security has been threatened. When you went out on that case and Jordan got that false message saying you were hurt that's where it came from. Now when she sees you leaving she thinks something is going to happen to you. She stays with you because she's safe as long as you're around no harm will come to her".
"Why is she different with the others? She knows the team won't do anything but she's scared of them sometimes".
"I don't know. What happened today".
"We got a case, I told Jo and she begged me not to leave her as always. When she calmed down I left her with Ruzek, Mouse, and Trudy. Ruzek took her out and she saw somebody and flipped out, she ran and when they found her she was holding a 2x4. It's like she's afraid of everyone but me, what do I do Daniel. This sitting by not doing anything ain't working anymore, I need to help my little girl and I don't know how. I can't just keep sitting by and letting her suffer like this, it's not fair to her. Jo didn't deserve what happened to her".
"I agree a hundred percent, but if you push Jordan to hard she could have a bad mental breakdown and that won't do anything. When Dr. Reese was with her she noticed something, she asked Jordan if the guy said anything to her or about her family. Something inside her triggered that's what caused her attack when she saw here. Something was said to her about her family and the only two people who knows it are Jordan and Yates. With Yates being gone only she knows and that could be why she's not talking she's afraid something could still happen".
"If I could I'd bring that son of a bitch back to kill him myself".
"I know it must be hard and frustrating Hank but until Jo opens up on her own there's really nothing you can do except be there for her. If she needs to cry be her shoulder that she can cry on. Be her rock".
Hank nodded. "Do you think she should go back to school?"
"That's a tough one. What you could do is run it by her and if she feels like she can, try it".
"Thank you Daniel".
"Anytime".
District 21
Alvin, Adam, and Jordan had arrived back to the District, Jordan was still fast asleep in the back. Adam then carefully opened her door causing her to jump and when she jumped he did.
"It's ok Jo, look were back at the District". Adam said.
The teen rubbed the sleep from her eyes and got out, as the three walked in there was a loud crack of thunder and the sky lit up with purple streaks of lightning. Jordan jumped again clutching her notebook, her breathing got heavy she shut her eyes tightly.
"Everything's alright sweetheart, it was just thunder". Alvin said softly.
She opened her notebook and wrote then showed it to the two men, 'I want my dad'.
"He'll be back soon sweetie, let's head inside".
There was another loud crack of thunder and Jordan flew into her godfather's arms shaking like a leaf, she shut her eyes as tightly as she could. They headed inside quickly as the rain started to come down hard.
Trudy saw the three coming in from the rain, Jordan was still a bit jumpy. When she noticed the young girl's hand bandaged up she got concerned.
"Ruzek you got a minute". Trudy spoke.
"Yeah". Adam replies.
The desk Sergeant watched as she saw her friend bring their goddaughter up to the squad, she then sent Adam a glare. "Wanna tell me what happened out there".
"I don't know what you mean".
"Jordan was fine when she left and now her hand is wrapped up. Care to explain".
"We were out she saw a guy who looked like Yates she ran and when they found her, she was holding a 2x4. One of the nails must have cut her". Something then came to his mind. "Why'd you tell Voight that I took Jo out?"
"He had a right to know. See Ruzek when you become a parent, a lot of things change. One thing you worry a lot more, I knew if Hank came back and she wasn't here he'd worry so I texted him because he had a right to know where his daughter was and who she was with".
"You have kids Sarge?"
"Jo is the closest I have to a daughter".
"What can we do for her? How do we help her?"
"You're guess is about as good as mine".
The others arrived and everyone headed upstairs, Trudy saw the bandage on Jay's cheek and wondered what the hell happened out there? When they got to the top they saw Hank's door was shut which probably meant Jordan was in there and wants to be alone.
Everyone sat at their desk in silence, nobody knew what to do or what to say. Jay got up because he understood how Jordan felt, he understood the pain of PTSD. Maybe he could try to get through to her. Erin saw her partner heading towards Hank's office she then got up going that way just as Jay was about to put his hand on the knob his partner stopped him.
"Jay no". Erin said quietly.
"Erin, I know how Jordan is feeling, I know what she's going through. It may not be the exact same reason but I understand her pain. The endless nightmares, the violent attacks, all of it, she's scared and has every right to be. Let me try to get through to her". Jay replies.
The detective was debating with herself, she knew Jordan better than some of the others. She knew if Jordan was in a room with the door shut she wanted to be alone, if Jay had went in there who knows what might happen. But on one hand, Jay did have a valid point. He was probably the only one who understood the teen's mental pain. It was worth taking a shot to get her to open up.
"Alright just try not to have her breakdown".
"I won't".
Pulling her hand back Jay then opened the door to Hank's office going inside. Jordan heard the door open she hoped it was her father but it was Jay. She stayed curled up on the couch clutching her notebook, glancing out of the corner of her eye the teen saw Jay sitting down next to her. Before he could start the teen wrote something and handed it over to him, Jay read the note. 'I don't wanna talk about any of it'.
He handed the notebook back then looked at her. "You don't have to talk, just listen. Jo I understand what you're going through, the nightmares, the episodes, all of it, you're not alone in this fight. Were all here for you, you're dad, us, everyone at 51 and Med, we're all here to help you not hurt you. You're scared and you have every right to be, we don't know what you went through, what was said to you, we don't know. When you're ready to open up whenever that may be just know you'll have a family to help you through this. Sweetheart, he's gone and he's not coming back. He can't hurt you or anyone else ever again".
Jordan had let what Jay said sink in, she was trying to go back to being normal but she didn't know how. She then wrote something in her notebook and before Jay could get up she shot her hand out stopping him.
"What is honey".
She handed him the notebook and read it, 'I'm sorry for what I did. I didn't mean to, I hope you and Kevin aren't mad at me'.
"Jo we aren't mad at you, we know you didn't mean it".
All she did was nod and watched as the detective left, she made sure the coast was clear. She pulled her phone out along with a business card dialing the number on her phone her thumb hovered across the call button till it pressed down dialing the number and the teen put the phone against her ear, it was ringing a few times till someone picked up.
-Benson. The voice said.
-O-O-Olivia? Jordan says, her voice quiet, cracked, and raspy.
-Jordan, honey is that you?
-Yes it's me. I hope it's alright that I'm calling.
-It's fine sweetie, how have you been you're dad said that you haven't said a word since that night.
-He's right. I can't be like this anymore Olivia, I don't wanna be like this. I want to be my old self again I just don't know how.
-Have you told anyone about what happened?
-No, I've been to scared. Besides, I don't want my dad to get mad at me.
-Sweetie why do you think you're dad would get mad at you?
-Because it was my fault, all of it was my fault.
-Honey none of it was your fault, nothing that happened was your fault.
-Yes it was. Today I ran from Adam because I thought...he was coming back for me.
-Jo he's gone he can't hurt you anymore.
-I'm trying to believe that but I don't know. Everywhere I go, I see him.
-Try talking to your dad about it and go from there.
-He won't blame me will he?
-No he won't.
-Thank you Olivia.
-Anytime.
Jordan hung up she hoped no one heard her talking, when she was ready to talk to the others and her father she would. She was finally gonna take charge of her life back. The teen was still afraid about talking about it with her father, would he get mad at her? Would he also blame her for her mother's death? Many more things roamed her mind.
A short time later Hank arrived back to the District, Hank walked to his office and as soon as his door was opened he felt arms wrap around his waist he looked down to see his little girl holding onto him and burying her face into his shirt.
"Ready to go sweetheart". Hank said looking down at her.
Shaking her head the teen pulled her father into the office closing the door, Hank was getting confused by his daughter's actions.
"Jo, what is it sweetie".
Taking a deep breath she started. "D-Da-Daddy. I'm ready to talk about what happened with...Yates". Her voice still quiet, cracked, and raspy.
The older father was surprised, his daughter hasn't said a word in weeks till now. He then sat down beside her, Jordan felt her breathing picking up but was able to control it.
"Take your time baby".
"I was at the District I stayed where Mouse could keep an eye on me then I got the first message, I had a feeling it wasn't Antonio I was about to go to Mouse with it but I got the next message saying you were hurt. I believed him. I told Mouse I was going to the bathroom but I really snuck out the back way the part you always told me to stay away where you have that cage. I knew if I snuck out from the back nobody would know". A couple tears slid down from her eyes and Hank wiped them away.
"It's ok sweetie take your time".
Sniffing the teen continued. "I got to the park and knew something was wrong, I was about to call one of you when he showed up. I wasn't thinking I ran I scraped my knee and twisted my ankle, my necklace fall off and I couldn't find it. Yates found me he told me I shouldn't have ran, he tried to get me to walk but I couldn't so he picked me up putting me on his shoulder I tried to fight him I really did but he told me if I didn't listen and I kept fighting". She stopped as she was getting real emotional. "He'd make me watch as he killed you and Erin but he also said my whole family. I didn't know if he'd do anything to Justin, Olive, and Daniel, I couldn't let anything happen to you guys because of me so I went with him. He also said after he killed you guys he'd kill me".
Hank felt his heart break as he heard his little girl retell everything from her time with Yates, a lump was forming in his own throat he swallowed it down then bit his own lip. He was about to dread this question but it had to be asked.
"Sweetheart did he...did he". Hank couldn't finished it. Was he about to ask his precious little girl if that sick bastard had taken her innocence? "Sweetheart did he...did he ever touch you?" His voice breaking at that question.
"Not in that way. No. He mostly picked me up and carried, sometimes he'd touch my cheek or my hair. But never in that way".
The older father released a breath he didn't know he was holding, at least the sick son of a bitch didn't take her innocence from her. But he still traumatized her, if he could Hank would bring that bastard to kill him all over again, to make him truly suffer for what he did not only to Erin but for his little girl.
"He had me in the back of the car for a while he turned the radio on and that's when I heard the Amber Alert for me after that he cut it off. We stopped he put me in the trunk so nobody could find me, it was always dark that's why I don't like being in the dark it reminds me of being in the trunks. We drove again we stopped I heard voices after that we kept driving we stopped again this time we were at a gas station he parked in the back so I wouldn't be seen. He said I'd been good so I deserved to be out for a minute or two and there better not be any funny business or else. He walked in with me I was looking around and saw that he went back outside, I wasn't paying attention and bumped into someone he saw me and knew me from the Amber Alert". Her bottom lip started wobbling as a painful memory came back. "I told him he had the wrong kid that my name wasn't Jordan, I said it was Anna Carter. I didn't mean to use mommy's name like that I swear but I knew you'd send someone if I was there I wanted to leave a clue that I was there".
"I know you didn't mean to use you're mother's name like that baby, it's not your fault". Hank had tucked some hair behind her ear and noticed that she flinched a little.
"The guy kept trying to get me to go with him I told him no because I knew Yates would kill him and as soon as we got outside….bang. Yates shot him his blood got on me he looked at me I couldn't hear what he was saying I couldn't believe what he did the next thing i remember was being in the trunk again right before he closed it he told me that the guy's death was my fault. We drove again this time we stopped at Erin's apartment he had a girl with him, I think he called her Nellie I can't be to sure. He had her in one room and me in another I don't know what for. He called Erin they were talking and he asked to you, after the phone call he locked Nellie in the closet and took me again. When he put me in the trunk again I started to kick the tail light I don't know how I thought of that I just did, I had a feeling that would catch attention traffic footage. We stopped again I had kicked him hard as I could, he gave me this look as if he was ready to kill me. I yelled at him to let me go but he wouldn't. He started talking about you and mom, how I got my looks from her and my attitude and temper from you. Then he started talking about mom". Her voice then started breaking again. "C-can I ask you something daddy?"
"You can ask me whatever you want sweetie".
More tears fell from Jordan's eyes as her watery brown eyes looked at her father. "W-was it my fault that mommy died?"
Time stop. Everything froze. Had Hank just heard that question right? Did Yates tell his little girl that it was her fault that Anna died? Now he really wished Yates was alive so he could make him suffer in unimaginable pain. More tears had fell from Jordan's face as she looked at her father.
"Is it true? Was it my fault that mom died?" Jordan voice kept breaking.
Without a second though Hank pulled his baby into his arms holding her, tears of his own started falling from his eyes. "No baby it wasn't your fault that you're mother died. You are in no way responsible for your mother's death, you were just a baby when she died. You're mother died a hero protecting this city, protecting us, protecting you".
"That's why I wasn't talking for the past few weeks, I thought you be mad at me and blame me for mom's death".
He gently pulled her away and wiped the tears that continued to come down. "Sweetheart, I'd never ever blame you for your mother's death. Never. You were 5 months old when she died, I remember that day. You were at home with me and Justin, we were playing with you on the floor that's when the doorbell rang I told Justin to take you upstairs and that's when I got notification about your mom. You were in no way responsible for that". He kept his voice gentle but it was firm.
"I tried to run away but he caught me, he said I made a really big mistake. He tied again put me in the trunk and we drove I think we stopped at a truck stop because I heard trucks. He was gone for a couple minutes then he came back because I heard the door open then close, next thing I know I was blinded by light because he opened the trunk and told me soon enough all of it would be over soon. He drove again we were driving for a while because when he got me out the trunk again it was dark, nobody was on the streets. At that point I stopped fighting him I wasn't gonna risk you're lives for me when he brought me in I saw the guy tied up he brought me to another room and said let's call Erin. He went back to the room where the man was then back to me, right before he hung up he told Erin to come alone or else". She began choking on a sob.
"It's ok take your time honey, don't rush".
"He told Erin to come alone or else there would be two more bodies to add to the list, he said he knew you didn't wanna bury me just yet. He looked at him and said don't worry it'll be over soon, said to be a good girl and not make a sound or any movement unless I wanted to face the consequences. I stayed still. It was quiet for a while then I heard a door open then close then talking, it was Erin and Yates talking. They talked for a bit next thing I know there's a snap noise and screaming, Erin was yelling at him he wouldn't stop next thing i know...bang. Then you and Erin and found me".
Hank felt his heart ache with pain after hearing everything that Yates did to her and said to her. He now knew why his daughter stayed quiet for those few weeks, the son of a bitch told her that it was her fault that her mother died. Yates had mentally broke his little girl.
Jordan then flung herself at her father again, crying into his shoulder. She felt as if a weight was lifted off of her. The thirteen year old finally let out all of the emotions she was building up the past few weeks, Hank gently rocked his precious little girl hoping to calm her.
"Shh it's alright sweetheart, he can't get you anymore. I'm here, daddy's got you".
After a few minutes the teen had calmed down and pulled away from her father's hold, she was wiping her face. She looked back to her father. "Do you think the others will get mad at me?"
"No they won't, I think they'll understand".
"Can you come with me to talk to them?"
"Of course sweetie".
The father daughter duo left the office opening the door which got everyone's attention, before speaking the thirteen year old looked up at her father he smiled nodding his head telling her it was ok.
"Listen up. I wanted to say that I'm sorry for how I've been the past few weeks, I flipped out a lot, ran away from some of you, hurt you. I wanted to say I was sorry". Jordan told everyone.
She went over to Adam first. "I'm sorry for running away from you today Adam, when I saw that guy I thought it was Yates coming back for me. All I could think was I wasn't gonna let him get me again so I ran".
"As long as you're ok that's the only thing that matters". Adam replies with a smile.
She then went over to Kevin. "I'm sorry for hurting today, I'm especially sorry for kicking you down below".
"It's all good kiddo. I have to ask who taught you how to kick below the belt?" Kevin says.
"My brother he says that's one epic weak spot on a guy that and behind the knee since I couldn't get you behind the knee I went below the belt".
The teen then moved to Jay. "I'm sorry that the nail cut you when we were fighting, I wasn't thinking".
"It's ok".
Jordan then went over to her sister. "Erin, I was kinda hoping you could only call me Jo for a little bit. When I hear Jordy it reminds of him".
"Whatever you want sweetie". Erin said giving her a smile.
The teen then went around and started hugging everyone, when Antonio hugged her first she barely flinched. The senior detective looked at her. "We gotta work on you're swings".
"You got it".
For the first time in weeks Jordan finally smiled which brightened up everyone's mood. Kevin then looked over to Hank.
"Sarge you're ok with her taking boxing". Kevin spoke.
"Why not? It's self defense, not her fault you can't take a punch from a girl". Hank shrugged.
Everyone then laughed at that, an idea popped into Jordan's head. She had hugged Alvin, Jay, Kevin, and Mouse, right before she hugged Adam she headed to the lounged and closed the blinds to the door and window. She opened the freezer and popped out two ice cubes holding them in her hand. The teen held them in her good hand behind her back as she headed over to Adam's desk no one said a word.
Jordan flung her arms around Adam's neck and he held the young teen, the thirteen year old then slipped the two ice cubes down his shirt which made him jump and move around quickly. Everyone in the squad started laughing, for the first time in weeks Jordan was even laughing. After the ice cube finally fell from Adam's shirt he then shot her a playful glare.
"It's on now squirt". Adam said.
The teen then ran over to Antonio hiding behind him. "Antonio! Hide me!"
The senior detective then stood in front of his niece. "I don't think so Ruzek".
"You're taking her side over me?" Adam asked playfully.
"She's more fun than you are. Besides that was priceless".
The young detective then looked to the teen with a playful look. "You started a war kiddo".
"Bring it".
Jordan then went over to her father. "Is it ok if I go see Aunt Trudy?"
"It's fine with me sweetheart".
A smirk appeared on the teen's face. "Hey Adam".
The young detective looked to see Jordan mimicking his actions from the ice cube which made everyone chuckle. Jordan headed down from the squad to see her godmother, Trudy was reading her paper and didn't notice her goddaughter yet. She wanted to surprise the older woman.
"Hi Aunt Trudy". Jordan said, breaking her aunt from her thoughts.
Trudy knew that voice anywhere she looked to see her goddaughter with a smile on her face. "Sweetie you talked".
"I did. It's time I put this whole Yates thing behind me and it needed to happen, I couldn't leave in constant fear or paranoia anymore. I'm taking control of my life back and I'm doing that now". Jordan said with determination.
"I'm so proud of you".
Jordan then hugged her godmother and this time didn't even flinch, just then Kim and Sean came in to see the scene in front of them. The teen saw the two patrol officers and decided to surprise them.
"Hi Kim, hi Sean". Jordan greeted the two officers.
The two patrol officers were shocked to hear the teen talk for the first time in weeks. Kim was the first to hug her then Sean. Jordan then headed back up to the squad looking over at Trudy, the desk Sergeant buzzed her goddaughter back up to the squad.
"Hey Sarge, why do buzz her up like that but not us". Sean said.
"Because she's my goddaughter, my favorite person, and she doesn't annoy me the like two of you". Trudy replies.
Sean looked to his partner with a raised eyebrow. "Well you asked".
Jordan was heading back up to the squad, Adam was quietly hiding near the steps he glanced to see the teen in reach and once she was close he got her from behind and started tickling her.
"A-Adam...stop". Jordan giggles.
"Not till you surrender". Adam replies.
"N-Never".
"Ruzek! You drop her I drop you". Hank warned his detective.
"I second that". Alvin spoke from his desk.
Once that was finished everyone headed out for the night, Jordan finally felt free. She felt free from the weight that was holding her down the past few weeks. But most of all she was finally free of Yates. It was time for her to take back control of her life and she was gonna do it.