*Requested for Benoight Langson*

*Follows up from chapters 32-34. Picks up from the last chapter. Crosses with SVU*

Jordan-13

Hank stared at Olivia in shock, what was she doing in Chicago? To his knowledge they weren't working on any joint cases together. There weren't any police conferences that required other law enforcement. Why was she here?

"Hi Hank" Olivia said with a smile.

"Olivia, what a nice surprise" Hank said with a smile of his own.

Jordan had given her own smile to the woman, Olivia looked to see the young teen with a smile.

"Hello to you too Jordan" She spoke with a smile.

"Hi Olivia," Jordan replied.

Hank then realized the time and saw his daughter was still supposed to be in school. "And we'll get to why you're not in school later" He told his daughter.

"Yes dad"

He then looked to Olivia. "Why don't you and Noah come over, we could talk and catch up"

"I'd love too"

Olivia had gotten into her car and took Noah back to the hotel so they could get settled, Hank and Jordan got into their car. The teen buckled up and glanced at her father. He was not alright.

"Daddy, it's ok not to be alright. You told me that. Remember"

"I'm just fine sweetheart. Now why'd you cut school today?"

"I'm not telling until you admit that you need help. There's nothing wrong with asking for help dad. I did. I'm better again, it took time but I'm me again. Please dad admit you need help. I...I already lost mom, I lost Justin once, I lost you once. I..I don't wanna lose you again. Please daddy, admit you need help" Her voice quivered and shook. "I can't and I won't lose you again please"

Hearing his little girl beg and plead for him to get help, it was pulling at him. It pulled at his heart, he felt it break when he heard her cry. If he didn't wanna get help for himself, he should at least do it for his little girl. If anything it was hurting Jordan more to know that her father would rather suffer than get help, only she wouldn't tell him that it would only make him feel worse.

Hank looked at the steering wheel as tears fell, he was exhausted, physically and mentally, he wasn't sleeping, he was barely eating, consistently on edge, very snippy with certain people, he had just put his team in harm's way. He could have gotten them killed, Adam was shot. And all that was on him, because he wouldn't admit he needs help.

Jordan looked at her father with tears of her own falling. "You're not ok daddy, I see it. You may think I don't know but I do. You try your best to shield and protect me but I see your hurting and it hurts me to see you like that. I hear you get up at night, I hear you crying. I'd see you get up and stay awake. Don't suffer anymore daddy please, get help. Go to Dr. Charles over at Med, get your own therapist. Just get help please!"

Taking a deep breath to avoid letting the sob Hank wiped his eyes and started to drive. He had to make a stop on the way home. He had to go check on Adam, that had eaten at him majorly. His officer almost died because of him. Had it been worse, Hank would never forgive himself.

The teen wiped her eyes as her father drove, after a quick drive the father and daughter were at the hospital. Jordan had gone inside with her father, if he wasn't gonna get help on his own she was gonna help. Will was on duty when she had seen them. When he saw the tear stains on their cheeks and their red eyes he got highly concerned.

"Hank, Jo, you guys alright?" Will asked, scanning them over.

"Were good Will thanks. I came to see Adam" Hank replied.

Jordan looked to her father wide eyed, she had missed that. What had happened to Adam? She considered him her partner in crime. The two were almost joined to the hip. Hank looked down to see his daughter and gently held her shoulder.

"I'm sure he's fine sweetheart," He assured his daughter.

The older Halstead looked and had a feeling that Jordan didn't know that Adam was shot in the field. "Adam's good, we got the bullet out and he's resting. If everything looks good he can probably go home tomorrow. We wanna keep him for observation"

"Can I see him?"

"Of course, he's in room 205"

"You mind watching Jo for me?"

"Not a problem"

The older Sergeant had gone to his officer's hospital room leaving his daughter with Will. Jordan was sniffing back tears, the older Halstead had bent down to her level.

"While we wait for your dad why don't we go have a snack and talk" He had kept his voice soft.

She had given a small smile and nod. Will had gone to get her a drink and something to snack on, the two had headed to the lounge. The teen had opened her chips and started eating, Will had opened his snickers and took a bite.

"What's bugging you kiddo?" Will asked.

"My dad, he's hurting really badly and he won't admit he needs help. Ever since Yates" She still shivered saying his name. "The case last month and he sent me away to protect me and now it's...it's" Her voice started shaking and quivering.

Leaning forward he gently took her hand and wiped the fresh tears from her eyes. "Take your time Jo"

She sniffed and wiped her eyes with the sleeve of her shirt. "It's the anniversary of my mom's death coming up and it's making him worse. He's always on edge, snippy, angry, exhausted. I can't lose my dad again Will. I just can't he's the only parent I have" The young teen held her head down feeling more tears.

Will brought the young girl into his embrace and she started to cry, he rubbed her back. Just a couple of years ago she was this eleven year old girl he knew as his brother's boss's daughter. She then wormed her way into his heart and she became family. She had become the little sister she and Jay never had.

"It's alright Jo, everything is ok. I promise. We'll figure something out" He comforted her.

"I-I-I want...my dad...back Will" She sobbed into his shoulder.

"You'll get him back. I promise"

Hank was in Adam's doorway, Adam was laid in the bed with his shoulder wrapped and it was propped up. He looked over to see his boss.

"Hey Sarge" Adam spoke.

"How ya feeling kid?" Hank replied.

"Hurts like a bitch, the doc said I'm gonna be out of the field for a bit.. Otherwise, I'll be ok"

Walking in Hank had gone to sit down beside him. "This is my fault this happened to you"

"Boss don't say that, it was a freak thing that happened"

"No Adam, it wasn't. I got intel about that place. It was a trap, I thought I had mentioned it but I must have forgotten. We went into a trap and almost got killed. I almost got you killed"

"Hank, I don't blame you. You've been under a hell of a lot of stress the past few months. The whole Yates thing, the case just last month and sending Jo away. It's taken a lot on you. None of this is your fault"

"I appreciate you saying that Adam"

"Maybe you should take time off and deal with everything. You're job will still be there, so will your office and desk"

For the first time that day Hank managed to crack a smile, the young officer sounded just like him. He had taught his team well.

Jordan was going to Adam's room. She wanted to see her partner in crime, she peeked in the room. Adam saw her and smiled.

"I think we both have a visitor Sarge," Adam told his boss.

Hank looked back to see his daughter, he smiled. "Come on in sweetheart, I'm gonna go grab some coffee. I'm sure you can keep Adam occupied"

"I'll try" The young girl smiled.

The older man had left the room leaving his daughter with his officer. Jordan looked to him with a small smile.

"Are you ok?" Jordan asked the young officer.

"I'm just fine sweetie, nothing I can't handle" Adam assured her with a soft smile.

After seeing Adam the father and daughter had left the hospital going home. Hank had texted Olivia telling her that she and Noah could come over for dinner that night. The father and daughter drove in silence, Jordan glanced at her father and back at her seat.

"I ditched school so I can go see mommy's grave" Jordan told him softly.

Sighing sadly Hank had stopped at a red light and looked to her. "I could have taken you sweetheart"

"I know. I guess I wanted to be by myself when I went to see her. I-I really miss her daddy"

"I miss her too sweet girl, more than anything"

"Why'd she have to die?"

"I don't know but I do know one thing. You're mother loved you more than life itself"

"S-she did?"

"She was over the moon when she found out she was pregnant with you. From day one she knew you'd be a girl"

"What was she like?"

The light had turned red and he started to drive again. "Your mother was the most beautiful woman ever. She was smart, brave, strong, loyal, she loved her job and what she did. She loved me, you, and you're brother. You're mother was the best woman ever"

"She sounds like the best"

"She was"

Soon the father and daughter arrived home they headed inside to start dinner. Hank decided to pop a lasagna in the oven for dinner while Jordan made a quick side salad. There was a knock on the door and Jordan ran to get it, when she opened it she thought it was Olivia and Noah but instead it was Antonio.

The senior detective looked at his young niece. "Hey Jo"

"Tonio" She simply said.

"I'm so sorry for what I said before. I was angry, emotions were high. I didn't mean it"

"Why did you say it then?" Her voice lowered.

"People say stupid stuff out of anger all the time. I didn't mean to hurt you I swear"

She had gone out to hug him. "I forgive you"

He wrapped her in a hug. "I'm really sorry kiddo"

"I wanna help my dad"

"We do too sweetheart"

"What do we do?"

Before the senior detective could respond Hank came out to see him, Antonio looked to him. "Can we talk?"

Hank signed him into the kitchen, the detective followed. He sat down.

"Want a beer?" Hank asked.

"No thanks, I'm good. I'm sorry I was completely out of line today, I was angry, emotions and tensions were high"

"You were right Antonio. It was my fault, I walked us into a trap. I almost got us killed. I've been so distracted and preoccupied"

"You need help Hank. You have been through hell the past few months. Between Yates, the case last month. It's ok to admit you need help, there's nothing wrong with it. That's why we're here to help you. You help everyone, but you don't let anyone help you. Let someone in Hank, let them help. Before it's too late. Take some time off, be with Jordan, talk to someone. It kills everyone to see you hurting. It's killing Jordan, she wants to help you and she doesn't know how"

The older man knew the words were true, when he looked in the eyes of his team it killed them to see their leader hurting and they couldn't help him. It even killed Jordan not being able to help her father, it had hurt her the most. When she was with her father, hearing her beg and plead for him to get him. It had broken his heart.

He felt tears falling and quickly wiped them, he never cried in front of people let alone his own team. He hated it. It made him feel weak.

"There's nothing wrong with admitting you need help Hank, it's our job to keep this city safe and protected. But we can't protect it if you're not fully there. If you don't wanna get help for yourself, do it for us. Your team, most of all do it for Jordan. You're daughter. Do it for your family. It doesn't make you weak, powerless, anything, if anything it makes you stronger. It shows Jordan that it's ok to ask for help instead of burying it all down and letting it consume her"

All Hank could do is nod, Antonio left as he had to get home. There was another knock on the door, Hank had gone to answer it. It was Olivia and Noah, she wore a simple blouse and jeans with flats, Noah had worn a regular shirt and jeans with his sneakers.

"Olivia you look great" Hank told her with a smile

"You don't look so bad yourself" She replied with a smile of her own. She looked to her son. "Can you say hi Noah"

The little boy waved shyly and hid behind his mother, Hank smiled. "He reminds me of when Jo was at that age, she was a shy little girl"

"I wasn't always shy," Jordan says going over. She had seen the woman. "Hi Olivia"

"Hi to you too Jordan" Olivia gave Jordan a warm motherly smile.

They all had gone to the kitchen and Hank served dinner, Olivia had helped her son. Jordan had started eating, she hoped Olivia wouldn't tell her father that she made the call to bring her out. At times Jordan was good at hiding stuff but in the end she got caught. Hopefully she wouldn't get caught this time.

"So Olivia, what brings you over to our neck of the woods" Hank says.

"I thought I'd come and check to see how you and Jordan were holding up. I know the past few months were rough. Just thought I should check in on you guys" Olivia answered, sipping the water.

Olivia hadn't told Jordan that after the first few weeks when she came home from New York, Olivia had called to keep checking on her father. He was getting better but eventually he stopped calling and around that time Jordan had noticed the change in her father and she made the call to Olivia so she could come out to help her father.

"We're doing good, never better," He smiled.

The older woman had seen right through the lie, she could tell by looking at Hank he was exhausted. The bags under his eyes showed it clear as day. It looked as if he hadn't slept right in months. She had seen all the signs but didn't say anything. Jordan had given her a sideways glance hoping she wouldn't say anything.

For the moment she had let it go, she didn't wanna start anything in front of the kids. Looking over she had looked at Jordan.

"How's school going Jo?" She asked the young teen.

"It's good, my grades are good' Jordan had answered with a smile.

"That's great make sure you keep it up"

"I will"

It was getting a bit late. Hank had sent Jordan up to her room to get ready for bed, Olivia had put Noah down on the couch as he was asleep. Olivia helped clear the table.

"You don't have to do that," Hank told her.

"I know, I figured you could use some help" Olivia responds.

They started to do the dishes, the older woman had glanced at him. "I didn't tell Jordan about our calls"

"I appreciate it"

"Hank, I do hope you're getting some kind of help"

"I am"

"I hope so, not only for you but for Jordan"

She wasn't gonna tell him that his daughter called her out to help, she didn't know how'd he take it.

"I'm gonna set an appointment up tomorrow"

"I'm here for a couple days with Noah if maybe you'd wanna do something. We could take the kids to the park or the zoo or something"

"I'd like that"

Jordan had forgotten she left her backpack down in the kitchen, she had gone back for it. When she got there, she stayed back watching. Hank had given Olivia a loving look and she had smiled in return, their faces leaned in with each other, their noses just about touching.

The teen's eyes were wide. Was her father about to kiss Olivia? This was not the kind of help she hoped for. Before she knew it the two adults were kissing. She had run back to her room quietly.

The kiss between Hank and Olivia was soft and gentle, she had her arms wrapped around his neck. Hank had put his arms around her waist and pulled her close. It was like electricity went through them, sparks were flying.

Hank hasn't been with another woman since Anna has died, he'd admit he's lonely without someone. He had his children but deep down he was alone, he hasn't been with anyone in thirteen long years. He missed it.

After a couple of minutes they broke apart and the two smiled. They were speechless for a moment.

"I uh, I should grab Noah and head out," Olivia said.

"I should go check on Jordan," Hank responded.

"Where should we meet tomorrow?"

"I'll call you and let you know"

She nodded. "Good night Hank"

"Good night Olivia"

He showed her out and watched as she walked to her rental car. Once she was in she drove away. Hank closed the door and locked up the house. The only thing that was on his mind was the kiss. He'd been alone for thirteen very long years. He missed having someone with him. Part of him wanted to move on but he couldn't betray Anna.

It would feel as if he's cheating on her. When Camille had died it had taken him a long time to move on from her, he moved on with Anna. He was happy again. He had a family again. He was complete. But then just like that Anna was gone. He was once again alone. All he had was his children. When he had lost Anna he'd given up relationships altogether, he couldn't take it anymore. All he ever needed were his children and he had them. They were happy, healthy, and safe. That was all that mattered to him.

Shaking all that off he went to check on his daughter. Jordan was laying on her bed not being able to get that image out of her head. When she called Olivia to help her father, kissing and locking lips with him was not the help she was talking about. Hank had gotten to her door and she had pretended to be asleep. The teen held her eyes closed as tears fell. Quietly going over Hank put the blanket around her tucking her in and softly kissed her head.

"I love you baby girl" He whispered.

Every instinct in her wanted to shoot up and hug her father but instead she laid there with her eyes closed. Hank had gone to his room for the night. Jordan couldn't sleep; she had called Erin over.

It was midnight when Erin got to Hank's she had thought there was a problem, Jordan quietly let her sister in.

"Thanks for coming over," Jordan said quietly.

"What's wrong? You texted 911. Is your dad alright? Are you alright?" Erin asked worriedly.

"Dad's fine, he's asleep. I can't sleep"

"What's wrong sweetie?"

"You didn't hear this from me" She paused. "Olivia came out to check on me and dad. She and Noah came over for dinner. They were cleaning the kitchen. Dad kissed her"

The female detective was taken back by that, she knew Hank hadn't felt that way about anyone in years. Looking down she had seen the teen getting upset.

"Why don't we go make some hot chocolate and talk"

Sniffing the teen nodded and they went to the kitchen, Erin started some water after pouring the powder mixture in the mugs. Jordan laid her head on the table. The female detective went and sat beside her.

"I don't want a new mom Erin, I want my mom"

"Honey you will always, always have your mom. She may not be here with you physically but she's in your heart. She lives in you every day"

"I want dad to move on and be happy but, I want him to be with my mom. I don't want him to be with anyone else"

"Jordy, you dad's been alone for a very long time. It'll be normal for him to have feelings for someone other than your mom. I know one thing for sure"

"What's that?"

"Your dad will always, always love your mom till the end of time. I didn't know you're mom but she was very special. She helped open your dad up in ways nobody thought was possible. He'd been upset about Camille's death for a long time. He told me when he met your mom, he was very happy again and that she gave him the best gift of all"

A small smile appeared on her face. "Me"

"That's right. Your father still loves your mom very much just like he will always love Justin's mom, Camille very much. Because that's the kind of person your father is. Should he ever choose to be with someone else, that doesn't mean he's gonna stop loving your mom. He'll always love her. Nobody could ever and I mean ever replace her"

"I want dad to be happy and move on but I want him and my mom to be together"

"I know sweetie, your father wants that more than anything"

"Thanks for talking to me Erin. It really helped a lot. And sorry for texting 911"

"You're welcome Jordy, you can always call me anytime. Day or night"

Erin had left going home, Jordan had cleaned up the mugs. Going back upstairs she went to her father's room. Hank was out like a light. She had quietly gone in, she climbed on the bed laying next to him. Moving his arm she moved into his side laying her under on his chest. Slowly she had started dozing off when she had heard whimpering.

Hank had started whimpering and slightly twitching, the teen turned a bit and gently stroked his cheek. "Shh, it's alright daddy. You're ok. It's just a bad dream. I'm ok. You're ok"

It had taken a few minutes but Hank had settled down and remained asleep. Jordan had slowly fallen asleep, curled next to her father. For the first time in months Hank had actually slept throughout the night and didn't wake up once.

The next morning Hank woke up around 9, he hadn't slept in that long before. When he moved he looked down to see his little girl fast asleep curled into his side, gripping his shirt like she did when she was younger. The older father smiled down at her and kissed her head. He laid there for a few minutes just holding her. For the first time in months he never felt better. He got actual sleep. He hadn't had any nightmares. None of it.

It was Saturday they were gonna be spending the day with Olivia and Noah. Hank had gotten up and took a quick shower then went to make some coffee and breakfast. Jordan woke up as the sun shined through the windows. She felt the bed empty and she got up and looked for her father.

Going downstairs she saw him in the kitchen making coffee and breakfast. When she saw her father she smiled, for the first time in months he looked like himself. He was well reseted. He wasn't cranky or moody. None of it. Maybe she was starting to get her father back.

The thirteen-year-old had gone to change, once she showered and changed she went back to her father. Hank had just put her plate on the table with a glass of juice.

"Morning daddy" Jordan spoke with a smile.

"Morning baby girl" He replied kissing her head.

"What are we gonna do today?" She had taken a bite of her waffle.

"I figured we can spend it with Olivia and Noah"

She didn't know how to feel about that yet completely, especially after the night before. The teen didn't want her father to know she saw him and Olivia kissing.

"That sounds like fun"

"I was thinking we can go to the zoo or something"

"I love the zoo I haven't been in forever"

"The zoo it is"

He texted Olivia about the zoo and to meet him and Jordan there. The father and daughter left for the zoo. Olivia and Noah were there waiting just as Hank pulled up. They got out and went over, Olivia smiled seeing them.

"Hey you two" She spoke.

"Hey" Hank responded.

"Hi," Jordan said.

Everyone had gone into the zoo after Hank paid, the two kids ran ahead while the two adults watched. They smiled seeing the kids. While the kids are looking at the animals, Olivia looks at Hank.

"How have you been Hank?" Olivia asked.

Taking a deep breath he spoke. "I'm not ok Olivia. Everyone sees it, Jordan sees it. I'm not me"

"And that's ok Hank. After William Lewis kidnapped me and went to jail, I wasn't alright for quite some time. I jumped every time I heard or saw something as a danger to me. I pulled my gun on my team who came to see me. I couldn't eat. I couldn't sleep. Had consistent nightmares. I knew I had to get better, I know it's hard but I seeked help and I'm me again. I'm stronger because of it. I'm a better cop. A better mother. I hadn't even met Noah yet and I fought for him and I hadn't known him yet. Because I fought I'm a stronger person because of it, I'm a stronger person, a stronger cop, a strong mother. You've gotta fight Hank. Fight like I had to fight. Fight for yourself. Fight for your team. But most of all fight for your family. Fight for Jordan, you're son, fight for them. Come out a stronger person, a stronger cop, a stronger father. Show Jordan it's ok to reach out for help. It's showing her she can be a stronger person because of it"

Hank was letting everything that Olivia was saying sink in, he was letting everything that everyone was telling him sink in. He did need help. He was too damn stubborn to admit it. He tried hard to ignore it but he couldn't not anymore. He put his team in danger and got one of them shot. He could very easily do the same to his little girl if he's not careful.

Looking over to see Jordan laughing and interacting with Noah had put a smile on his face. It was time he fought, he was gonna fight to get better. Fight to be a better person, a better leader, a better cop, but most of all a better father. He wanted to be a better father for his little girl. One she could be proud of.

After the zoo trip the two adults had gone back to their cars and helped the kids get settled before turning to each other.

"So about last night.." Hank started.

"Let's keep that between us. Nobody'll ever know" Olivia says.

"Thank you for coming out here to check on us"

"I was worried when you stopped returning the calls, you texted saying you got busy"

"I'm gonna get help, I give you my word"

"I know you will. Just like I told Erin and Jordan, my phone is always on. You can call me anytime day or night"

"Thank you"

"You're welcome"

He placed a gentle kiss on her cheek and she smiled. "Until next time Hank"

"Until next time"

They had parted ways. Hank had gotten in the driver seat and drove out the parking lot, Jordan glanced at her father.

"I know you're gonna get better daddy" She told him.

"I know I will be too sweetheart" Hank replies with a smile.

Before the father and daughter knew it, it was the anniversary of Anna's death. Like every year they went to the cemetery, Jordan wore a simple red dress that came to her knees with white leggings and sneakers. She had done her hair in a braid. Red was her mother's favorite color. She always tried to wear it to help her feel close to her mother.

Hank had wore regular clothes, he wasn't big on dressing up unless he had to or Jordan begged him. Once the father and daughter were ready they went to the cemetery. Jordan had gotten lilies, her mother's favorite flower.

The father and daughter stood in front of a grave.

Anna Carter

Beloved mother, daughter, sister, and friend to all.

Moving from her spot Jordan had set the flowers on the grave and moved back, Hank had wrapped an arm around her keeping her close. He kissed her head.

"I miss her daddy" Jordan muttered, holding back a sob. "Even though I was a baby when she died. I really miss her"

"I know sweetheart, I miss her more than anything" Hank replies softly.

"What do you do when you miss her?"

"I remember all the good times we had together. I remember the day she told me she was pregnant with you. I remember the day you were born. Other times I'll look at you"

"Me? Why me?"

"Jo, you're the spitting image of your mother. When we saw you for the first time, we knew you looked just like your mother. You have her long hair, her beautiful looks, her big heart"

The teen smiled and leaned into her father. "You always did say I looked like mom but I acted like you"

"That is also very true. You're a good mix of both of us"

"Do you think mom's watching over us?"

"I know she is honey. Every day"

Looking down at the ground the teen then looked to her father. "I also know that mom would want you to be happy. She'd want you to move on and be happy. And I'd be ok with it too"

The older father had bent down to her level. "Sweetheart, as long as I have you, you're brother, Olive, Daniel, and everyone else. I'm perfectly happy"

She wrapped her arms around his neck hugging him tightly. "I love you daddy"

"I love you too my sweet girl"

The following day Hank had made an appointment to see Dr. Charles at Med, he wasn't one for therapy. It felt like a waste of time. But not this time. He made a promise he'd get better and he planned on keeping it. His knee was bouncing.

Reaching out Jordan grabbed his hand. "It's alright daddy, I'm here for you. You won't do this alone. Not while I'm here"

The older father had smiled and kissed her head brushing her hair back, for all the trauma his little girl had endured the past few months she was strong for her age. Most other kids wouldn't be able to handle all the stuff Jordan went through. From being kidnapped and held hostage by a psycho, seeing people gunned down in front of her, witnessing a murder and being sent to New York for her safety. His little girl was very strong for her age.

All that trauma and drama she went through she fought to get better, she fought to get back to herself. She fought to be who she is again. Jordan was a strong little girl. After all she was a Voight and they were strong.

Dr. Charles opened the door letting them in, Jordan looked to her father.

"We'll do it together, as a family"

He smiled and held her small hand in his. He was extremely grateful and lucky to have her as his daughter. It was as if the roles had been reversed, it would normally be him helping her. Now it was the teen helping her father.

Hank walked into the office with his daughter and he was on his own way to recovery.