(A/N: I'm trying to write a sequel to a fanfiction that I have not posted on here, because I feel it may be a little to close to 'Keeping Promises' than will allow. So um, I'm trying to write a scene, and I get stuck. So, I started writing random stuff, just to make it funny. It cured my Writer's Block.)
By the way, I have nothing against Enrique- No, wait. I do. I hate the stupid ponce.
I don't have anything against Fred Luo. Or gays. I have a good friend who is gay.
The Baby's name.
...The frustration at not finding a good name carried on as they came up with more and more, eventually getting silly and deliberately suggesting daft names, the two rogues sat in bed leaning against the propped up pillows and laughing.
"No,
no, I'm not calling my son Buttman. Or boob-boy."
"What
about Lawrence of boxer shorts? Or, seeing as I am Buttman, how
about Butt.Jr?"
"Vyse, where did you get these
names?"
"A comic book." Vyse said evasively. He
didn't want to tell her that the author of this fan fiction was
in fact completely insane and in control of their destinies.
"Oh,
maybe you are too immature to be a father, then. Calling him
ButtJr."
Vyse looked down at the young woman lying
in his arms. Then he looked again.
"What about your
father's name?"
"I don't like the name Eric. What
about his middle name? Lee?"
"I
like that. But then again, Buttman does have a ring to
it."
"Well, we'll toss a coin. If I win, I choose.
If you win, Buttman is his name. If it's a boy."
"Great."
Vyse grabbed a coin, called heads, and flipped it. Looking at the
coin on the back of his hand, he let out a whoop and started
dancing around the room, even though he was completely
naked.
"Aw, damnit!" Aika cried. Then she looked
again at the coin.
"It's double sided!" She howled.
"Gethereyoubloodyidiot!" She leapt up and chased him
around the room. The door opened and Vyse smacked straight into
it, falling backwards to the floor, right in front of
Enrique.
"OOOooOoOoOOoOoOo!" Enrique trilled, his
hands on his hips as he bent forwards to get a better look at
Vyse lying like a turtle, limbs splayed outwards. Enrique was
currently dressed in a frilly pink nightdress, curlers in his
hair, and fluffy pink bunny slippers.
"OI!" Aika
screamed, headbutting Enrique through the window and into a patch
of nettles.
"He's mine!" She yelled, shaking
her fist as she leaned through the shattered window.
"Now,
you. You will pay for calling my son Buttman!" She grabbed a
conveniently placed jug of treacle from the bedside table and
began dousing him in it. Then she picked up the treacle covered
rogue and hurled him out of the window, next to the fangirl
author, Enrique, Alfonso, Vize, Daikokuya, the Guild-man,
Galcian, Lawrence, Don, the King of Hyrule, Ingo, Osman, Ruto,
The mayor of Clock town's wife, Darunia and, strangely enough,
Fred Luo from Outlaw Star.
"Wrong set, idiot!"
Called Gene from off-scene. Fred's eyes lit up.
"Genie-poo?
Is that possibly you?" He sprinted towards Gene, who burst
into tears and ran off calling for Melfina to help him. She was
busy in the jacuzzi with Harry and Ron Mc.Dougall, Goku, Vegeta,
Tenchi and Hayate from Dead or Alive 2. Gene grabbed Jim and
hurled him backwards at Fred.
"TRAITOR!" Jim
howled, giving Gene the finger as Fred gave him a BIG cuddle!
The other gays looked on interestedly, before turning their
attention back to the treacle covered naked guy. Ramirez jumped
out of Aika's closet, wearing only a foam top hat with the name
of a popular beer brand on to laugh at them, his hands on Aika's
hips.
"Teach him to give our son ridiculous names!"
He grinned as Vyse screamed at the horrible torture- of being
licked to death!
THE END!
