Greetings, all. It has been quite some time and I hope you're all doing well.

A quick note before we begin the chapter.

Firstly, I am hard at work at the rewrite of this story, and have already gotten several chapters done. As always, I appreciate your patience with my sporadic upload schedule. Secondly, is a warning. This chapter contains sensitive subjects that may not be suitable for some readers along with graphic depictions. Please read at your own discretion.

Thank you, and enjoy.

Chapter 17: Memories Can be Vile

"Welcome to the Arkham library! History is so important. A traumatic event here, a murder there, it's enough to drive anyone ca-razy!"

My brain had barely even been able to acknowledge Joker's voice as his boys ambushed me the moment I stepped into the room. Thankfully, there had only been three or four, a safe amount for me to handle despite the stinging pain that came from my side every time I turned too fast. As the fight progressed, my vision began to blur, yet I could still make out the TV screens littering the wall. It only made me all the more uncomfortable, almost able to feel the clown's cold eyes surveying my every move. I stumbled back, just nearly missing the fist carelessly thrown at my face.

"By the way, looooooove the new getup, kiddo." Shooting a quick look in Joker's general direction, almost glaring, I forced the heat from my cheeks while taking out the last man standing. As soon as the body hit the floor I leaned over, heaving in pain, I could feel that familiar throbbing feeling spread through my ribs. Though whatever I had used on the wound numbed the general pain, it hadn't gotten rid of the overall feeling. My body and my brain had been fully aware of what had been under my weak wrapping job.

"My, oh my, Ambsy. What are those bandages hiding?" As I looked over at him I attempted to contain my composure, but could only grunt lightly and drop gently to my knees. Joker's look had been smug, and he was squinting at me, which only caused me to fumble and use my cape to block the wound from his view. However, by the time I had, it had been too late and he had already caught on to what it had been, causing him to gasp dramatically.

"Did my boys actually get you!?" I stayed silent, merely letting Joker marvel in the fact that his men had managed to do something right, despite the objective being to kill me rather than just skim me. Still, a shot was a shot, and it had been the closest thing to incapacitating me.

Well, next to Bane, maybe. That guy kicked your ass.

Shaking the thought from my head, I kept my eyes focused on the floor, desperately trying to push away the wave of nausea that rushed over me.

"You poor thing, I can almost see the exhaustion." My nerves tensed at the sudden shift in his tone, a shiver coursing down my spine. I glanced up, making brief eye contact with him and he must have caught onto something during the brief exchange, something that peeked his amusement. I couldn't hide anything from him.

"Just give up, Amber. Lay down, let Uncle J take care of you." My breath had grown more shallow, he was messing with me, playing his game.

He's trying to break you.

My glare turned cold as I clenched my fist, slowly pushing the pain away. The clown wanted to believe that he understood me, that he knew what made me afraid, anxious, angry. He didn't know me.

"No? I'm trying to give you an out here, Amber, possibly one where you make it out of this alive." I had to say something as a response, anything. Yet despite my brain trying it's best, I could only remain silent.

"You might die tonight. I know you know that."

"I know."

It was all I could muster up to say, but it was enough to get him excited to be engaging in another conversation with me. Seeing as his usual adversary had constantly given him the silent treatment, it almost seemed like a welcomed change of pace for the clown. Of course the thought had crossed my mind on several occasions throughout the night, but now it had seemed almost numb to me. Standing in front of Joker and hearing it from him didn't seem to change that.

I saw his eyes scan me, as surprisingly he had been silent for a moment, deep in contemplation. Finally, after what seemed like minutes, he chuckled. As he leaned back in his seat, he folded his hands into each other, a playful smirk spreading across his face.

"Gotta say, I'm impressed." For some reason, that had been the thing to throw me off, and for the life of me I couldn't tell if he had been serious, despite his tone sounding surprisingly genuine. I wasn't trying to impress him, at least not anymore. I had made it far enough in the night to prove my point, and despite whatever setbacks I hit, I didn't intend to quit now. I was going to give whatever I could to make it through the night, whatever that meant.

"Well it should get easier from here, because now all you have to do is head downstairs and save the helpless hostages...riiiight?"

Hostages?

Shit.

Jolting forward, I practically stumbled over my own feet as I rushed out of the room, running down the stairs to the lower floor, jumping a few steps at a time. At the bottom, in the main doorway, had been a guard and a doctor tied up back to back. A giant, yet surprisingly neatly wrapped, present had been perfectly placed, between their chairs. Cautiously, I hesitantly made my way towards them, yet before I could make it through, the electrical doorway clicked on. I stumbled back, letting out a yelp as I blocked my face from the sparks flying from it.

"Oh, how frustrating! That wound must really be messing with you if you thought it was going to be easy! Has tonight taught you nothing?" I couldn't choose which had been more irritating, the fact that Joker had been speaking to me with the same tone one uses with a toddler, or the fact that he had been right.

Of course it's not going to be that simple. This is the Joker we're talking about. Has tonight 'really' taught you nothing?

I scowled, shooting a glance up towards the ceiling as if he could see me, despite half of the time being unaware if he actually could or not. Huffing lightly, I acknowledged the guards, assuring them that I would be back.

"Better hurry, two minutes in counting!" A swore slipped from my lips as the present between the two began to tick, naturally causing panic for the hostages. Releasing another swear under my breath I raced back up the steps to the room I first entered, scanning around furiously for something that could have been of use to me.

Come on, Amber, there has to be something.

I grumbled lightly while biting my lip in utter frustration, as well as it being a desperate attempt to not let my nerves get the best of me, while I continued to scan the room. As I stepped further in, the sound of my shoes clanking against the glass floor hit my ears, causing a pause as I glanced down. Through it, I could just make out the shapes of the guys below on the bottom floor.

Realization dawned on me that if I broke the glass, I would be able to get into the room, though my doubts had been toying with me as I knew it was impossible to break through with mere body strength. I racked my brain for what else I would be able to use, ruling out both explosive gel and the grapple, as the glass had been too thick for either of those.

As the seconds ticked on, I felt myself becoming more hectic, I was running out of time. Surveying the room once more, I searched everywhere for an answer, anything that could have been of help. Finally, I looked up, and spotted the giant chandelier above.

Well...that'll work.

Fumbling, I grappled up to the higher floor, gripping onto the edge. Yet before I had been able to pull myself up, a surge of pain shot through me sharply. I wheezed, struggling frantically for a moment while dangling, only able to wait for my body to calm down enough to pull over.

"One minute to go!" Joker chimed happily in my clogged ears.

"What!? Already!?" I called out, barely recognizing my own voice, and I hadn't realized I had said anything until after it had left my lips.

"Time flies when you're having fun, kiddo!" He chuckled just as I had gotten over the railing, onto the correct floor, huffing as I slammed into the ground.

"Hardy fricken har." I muttered bitterly, pushing myself to stand while fumbling for a batarang, clumsily taking one out and chucking it at the cable that was supporting the chandelier. The fall almost seemed to happen in slow motion. It slammed and crashed through the glass of the lower floor, the sharp shattering berating my ears.

Releasing the breath I had been holding, I jumped down back over the railing, the wind nearly escaping from me as the cape slowed my fall, allowing me to land safely on my feet. Shaking my nerves away, I hurried over to the two men, and just as I reached them to stop the bomb, the box exploded. Yet all that had come out was confetti and an oversized boxing glove. I jumped back, my heart stopping for a moment before I realized it hadn't actually been a threat. No matter what I had done, they would have been safe regardless. The whole thing had been nothing more than a mind game, only for his amusement to watch me stumble around, and being injured was most likely the icing on the cake. The thought caused me to huff.

Screw you, Joker.

However, a sigh of relief slipped through my lips. A part of me, though as disgusted as it had been, couldn't help but hand it to the man. He knew very well how to mess with someone, how to make their nerves flare and throw their mind into overdrive. I took in a deep breath, glancing over at the doctor, who had been rubbing his wrist in an attempt to sooth his skin from the rope marks embedded into it.

"Thank you, Amber." He breathed in relief, looking up at me, and despite still seeming slightly frantic, the relief had been evident in both his voice and expression.

"Are they all gone?" Before I could confidently respond to that, my eyes scanned the room, as if needing to double check and make sure nothing appeared out of thin air. When I was sure the coast was clear, I turned to focus back on him and nodded lightly.

"Yeah, they're gone. What happened in here?"

"It all happened so fast. Some patients broke in, began tearing up the place like they were looking for something." My body tensed, hoping they hadn't found the notes first, though I was more than certain that I would hear from Joker about it if they had.

"Bill here fought back, but there were too many. They took Doctor Young, she rushed in here and they followed." The doctor held his head in his hands for a moment, as if he had been recalling the events, and the trauma he had been through. He seemed defeated and disappointed in himself, this caused me to focus on the guard, Bill, just as he had made his way over to join the conversation.

"I'm sorry...when I came to we were all tied up, Doc Young was gone." A light swear escaped my lips as I took in a deep breath, harshly rubbing my temples to subdue the headache beginning to pound at my skull. I couldn't be upset with them, it was a strange night for everyone involved and it had definitely sent everyone out of their comfort zones. No one had trained for the night, and the only one who had any sort of plan had been the clown. It was more so the situation that I had been aggravated with, a wild goose chase that had seemingly only been getting worse. Just when I had felt I was making some progress, I was thrust back to start over, it almost felt as if sometimes I had been going in circles.

"I heard on one of the radios though, it sounded like they were being told to meet in the Warden's office." Perking up, I turned back to him, a surge of hope sparking through me. It almost had felt like a foreign feeling, rare, yet welcomed throughout the night.

"Alright, I'll take that." I nodded in thanks as they both went off to possibly console each other. Now I had known where to find Doctor Young, despite it still not doing much good for me in finding the notes.

Doctor Young was trying to hide her notes before she was found, and they were tearing up the place when I walked in.

That had really only meant one thing.

I was close.

I spent a few moments walking around the room aimlessly before remembering I had the doctor's DNA trail on my glasses. Fumbling for a moment, I placed them on and hit the button as my vision flashed, the trail reappearing across the screen. As I went over the shelves to follow it, one of the books had suddenly flashed with a trace of her handprint. I perked up and felt my heart beat quicken as I hurried over and grabbed it. Observing it closely, I opened it and immediately released an audible breath of relief. Hidden amongst the pages of the book had been Doctor Young's notes. It was only one page, with strands of DNA and different equations littered about it.

Funny how this little piece of paper can cause so much trouble.

Releasing another breath, I hit my communicator, attempting to keep my excitement to a minimum despite failing miserably.

"Oracle, I found the notes on the formula!" As soon as the phrase had left my lips I was fast to shrink back, scanning around sheepishly to make sure none of Joker's men had heard my foolishly loud announcement.

"Great job." Oracle's tone had almost matched my own, causing me to smile as I glanced back down at the paper while rotating it in my hand.

"That doesn't mean you've stopped the Joker, it's never this simple with him." I stood up straight, immediately recognizing the third voice that had joined in on the conversation.

"Batman! How...are you doing?" I asked, my voice trailing off as I was unsure of what to say to him, considering how our conversation had ended the last time we spoke. I hadn't been sure how he was still looking at the situation, if he still wanted to get me out of the asylum, if he still deemed the whole thing too much for me. I had hoped that finding the notes would have potentially shown him that I had in fact been capable. Of course, not only that successful feat, but also the general point that I had still been alive. My gaze slowly cast down to the wound on my side for a brief moment.

Well.

For the most part.

However, I had still been generally concerned about his safety and where he had been. While I was well aware that he had been more than capable of handling himself, not having Batman to guide me through the insane asylum put me in a state of uneasiness that I would have rather not even been near. He had been a source of comfort ever since I had been young, and even in the circumstance, nothing had changed.

"Stay focused, Amber, you're the only one who can stop him now." I paused, noticing the abrupt change in tone from the last time we addressed the situation. Suddenly, the relief I had reveled in left me, and I was back to walking a tightrope of anxiety.

"What do you mean?" I asked quietly, preparing myself for the worst outcome, my fists clenching and unclenching at the nerve racking anticipation.

"Joker has the entire asylum locked down, no one in or out." I froze, pausing for a moment before responding.

"That's including you?"

"Unfortunately."

Damn.

There was another pause before Batman spoke up again.

"I'm sorry, Amber."

I was taken aback at the quiet and reserved tone in his voice, underlined by genuine sincerity, he truly meant what he had said. It shot a twinge of pain through my chest for a moment until I had began to process what his apology had meant. It had meant there would be a chance I wouldn't make it out of the asylum alive. A chance I wouldn't be able to go home. If I lost, what then?

You can't afford to think like that, Amber.

However, there hadn't been a way for Batman to come and help, even if he wanted to. Despite Joker's threat about the bombs spread around the city coming up as nothing but a bad joke, both myself and Batman still knew deep down, that there still had been a chance he had something else planned in case the caped crusader had any idea of coming to my rescue. It was best to play it safe, for Gotham's sake. I couldn't blame him, he was putting his city first, something he always did.

That left me. Stuck in Arkham Asylum with an insane clown who wanted to break me in every possible way, until I was nothing more than a crumpled mess on the floor, begging for death. At that moment, it seemed as if I was facing the point of no return, no turning back. There hadn't been a Dark Knight to save me, only to guide me.

For whatever reason, whether it had been the extreme exhaustion, the blood loss, or the determination, I wasn't afraid. Whatever happened would happen for a reason, and I was ready to accept that.

That didn't mean, however, that I would lie there and give up. If anything, it drove me further, and I was ready to fight like hell. Taking in a deep breath, my hand traveled back to my communicator as I finally mustered up the only response I could think of.

"Okay." Batman had fallen silent, as well as Oracle, which left me an open space to add on.

"Joker better be ready then."

"That's the kind of attitude we need to beat him." Oracle spoke first, causing a light smile to grace my lips as I glanced down at the notes.

"First thing's first, what do I do about these notes?"

"Burn them." Was Batman's curt response, causing me to nod, despite him unable to see it, as I shuffled around my belt in search of something to help. Knowing Bat-matches weren't a thing, I pulled out the explosive gel with questions if it could possibly work as a solution. Spraying a little onto the paper, I tossed it into the air while hitting the trigger. It made quick work of the paper as I watched it dissolve into ash, the remaining crumbled pieces skittering down to the floor. Letting out a small sigh of relief, I ran a hand through my hair and went to go hit my communicator to ask for the next step, yet before I could an annoyingly familiar voice hit my ears from a screen to my left.

"What's that you've got there, Ambsy?" Joker had just leaned forward as I slowly turned to the screen, just in time to see him inspect the scene closely before gasping dramatically.

"Noooo! Not the formula! What am I going to do!? Who can help me now?" He cried mockingly, leaning back in his chair while placing the back of his hand against his forehead in feigned, agonizing defeat. Suddenly, he sat up straight and turned to me, acting as if I had said something that may have sparked an idea.

"What's that? How about my old friend Zsasz? Hmm, I did bump into him on the way back from the Gardens, where no doubt he was acting out some twisted fantasy. Maybe he could get her talking? I think he probably can! Great plan, kiddo!" I stuttered, unsure of how to respond to his rant to himself. The screen clicked off before I could say anything, causing me to huff in exasperation.

"God damn, clown." I muttered bitterly, making my way towards the door with the same thoughts repeating over in my head.

Zsasz had Doctor Young. If he had managed to successfully threaten the formula out of her then the entire night would go to absolute shit. Pushing open the door, I hurried through, hearing a slight hissing sound. Coughing lightly, I scanned the area for a moment to see what the hell could have possibly caused the noise. Seeing nothing, I shook it off and continued on, heading down the hall. When I had turned the corner, however, I stopped. I held my head, fearing for a moment that I would possibly collapse again. Thankfully, the feeling eventually passed, and the rain patting down gently helped calm my nerves.

Wait...rain?

Glancing up curiously, I took note that there had been actual rain inside. There were no sprinklers, no leaks, no possible way for water to make it's way in. I could barely even feel my hair and clothes getting wet, as if there had been a strange aura surrounding me that had been preventing it. Pulling a face of confusion, I took in a deep breath and continued down the hall, feeling my heart begin to beat heavier in my chest.

My steps were slow, and no matter how much I wanted to run to get out of the uncomfortably stretching hallway, I couldn't. The rain began to pour down heavier, and my body began to feel weighted down by a tingling sensation, and for a moment I felt something begin to fester deep in the pit of my chest.

Fear.

A flash of sudden lightning caused me to jump, and as I was regaining my breath, I stopped walking after noticing that the hall had changed. The floor had turned into a cracked street an an occasional trashcan would knock over due to the winds beginning to pick up. Blinking in utter bewilderment, I took a small step back before continuing my way down the hall, my walk becoming all the more panicked and the walls felt as if they had started to close in. Clenching my fists, I attempted to stay standing up straight as I walked down the seemingly never-ending hall.

"Ungrateful bitch!" My nerves had frozen completely as I stopped in my tracks, an echoing voice ringing in my ears. The color drained from my face as I began to shake, my breath growing ragged.

That voice. I knew that voice, though I never would have believed I would hear it again.

"Worthless piece of shit!"

It took all I had to push the stinging tears away from my eyes and slowly continue forward, my steps slow and heavy. Another flash of lightning caused the scene to morph completely. The walls had changed into front doors of run down apartment complexes, street lamps dimly lit the path ahead through the fog of the night. I could now feel the wind blowing through my hair, and as I glanced up I could see the dark, gray clouds fully cover everything as they cried upon me. It was as if I had been standing outside on an unknown, abandoned street. Yet, the street hadn't been abandoned, and it certainly wasn't unknown. I recognized the area all too well.

"Robert, please!" A woman's voice cried, begging frantically.

"She's just a child!" I flinched as a scream pierced through the air, a scream that tore me into two.

Before I could even think about moving, one of the apartment doors swung open in front of me, and all I could do was watch, as a small figure stumbled in pure distress down the steps onto the street. A child. No older than six years old, with tangled red hair in sloppy pigtails, fear embedded into her green eyes, and bruises on her pale tear, stained face.

The child didn't make it far before she tripped, slamming harshly into the asphalt. A large, gruff man was swift to follow her out, and he grabbed her by the arm, yanking her onto her feet. Stumbling, she tried to pull away, the threat of dislocation looming over her ominously. This left the child only able to whimper as the man backhanded her across the face, causing a yelp to slip from my tightened, dry throat.

Stuttering, the young girl tried to speak, but all that came out was blood dribbling down her chin. The man, blinded by fury, punched the child with a sickening crack emitting from her nose. She hollered, her body going limp, yet the grip the man had on her prevented her from falling onto the ground in a crumpled heap.

He then hit her, again, and again, and again. I could only watch. Frozen.

BANG.

I flinched spastically at the sound of the gun going off, causing the man to stop only for a brief moment, before he fell to his knees with a bullet through his chest. The child scampered back and fell into a curled up mess, sobbing furiously as my gaze slowly shifted to the doorway of the apartment. The man's wife, the girl's mother, stood there shakily holding a pistol in her grip with both hands. When she had caught her breath, she dropped the gun and hurried over to her child, scooping up her bleeding, limp form gently into her arms and holding her close.

"It's okay...it's okay, I'm here."

I reached out a shaking hand to her, yet before I could, another flicker of lightning struck, and I had been standing in front of a tombstone, chipped and cracking. The weight had at last taken over me as I finally collapsed to my knees in the small dirt patch, reading the name over, despite knowing exactly what it had said, having seen it countless times.

Annalise Jeanette Hale

Tears streamed down my face as I was unable to stop them, yet I stayed silent, the only sound being my shallow breathing.

"What's the story on this?"

"It's a god damn mess, Walker. Wife offs the husband, but I guess she didn't know the amount of shit this bastard was tied up in. A week later, his boys come and smash her brains in. They left the kid. We found her last night, but my guess is she's been there for a couple days. She looks like shit. Pretty gruesome scene, kid smelled like piss and vomit, it-"

"Alright, that's enough, god damn it. She's sitting right here."

There was a brief pause.

"Hey...are you alright? Do you need anything?"

Silence.

"I'm sorry...I'm sorry for what happened to you."

Silence.

"Sometimes...bad things happen to good people. Look, let me get you some water. My name is Detective Clive Walker. What's yours?"

Silence.

"I know things are tough right now, but I promise you, I'm here to help. But to do so, I need 'your' help. So please, what's your name?"

Silence, but then...

"...Amber."