A/N: this takes place 3 days after the funeral.
January 17th-10:46 PM
I thought that once the funeral was over, things would get easier. I thought that people would stop looking at me with pity and asking me how I am 'holding up.' I also thought that that was what I wanted.
Now, I'm afraid that people will just...forget Mom. I think I'm afraid that I am going to forget her, too.
Part of me knows that I could never forget her, but the other part of me really wonders.
She only died five days ago, and I'm already starting to think about her less and less.
I'm back at school now, and sometimes I go a whole class hour without thinking of her. Sometimes it's an even longer period of time, which makes me feel guilty.
What's worse though, is I sometimes just forget that she's dead. Then, when I remember again, I feel all that pain, and sometimes even the shock, of when I first found out.
It's not like I want to go through the rest of my life mourning her, I just...I don't know. I guess I just wish there was a way that I could think about her without feeling sad, or without feeling guilty when I DON'T think of her.
This is all going to get easier, right Diary?
A/N: please review