Title: What the Hell?

Summary: House puts his foot into his mouth this time.

Author: Mikesh

Part: 18
Warning: Mpreg for later chapters so if you don't like then please don't read.

Disclaimer: Don't own House but I wish I did.

By time House got into the room he found his team there. Cuddy came in a few minutes after he did.

"So who's going to do this exam?" House asked from his chair.

"I am," Wilson said coming in wearing scrubs because he'd been wearing his change of clothes that he had in his locker already.

"Goody," House said.

"Lift your legs up," Wilson said coming over to House.

"Why?" House asked.

"Because I'm going to put you on the table," Wilson said.

"Why? Just drawl blood and go test it," House said starting to roll up his sleeve.

"Be a stubborn ass," Wilson said picking House up and setting him on the exam table.

House would have hit Wilson with his cast but he knew if he did then Wilson would probably squeeze harder around his waist which would hurt his ribs.

"Now what?" House asked.

"Take off your jacket and outer shirt. Pull up your other shirt," Wilson said.

"Why?" House asked.

"Because I'm going to do a ultrasound," Wilson said.

"Why?" House asked just sitting there.

"Just do it," Wilson said.

"And if I don't?" House asked.

"I'll cut your shirts off for you," Wilson said.

"Fine," House said giving him a real evil look.

"Thanks," Cuddy said after House did it.

"Not welcome," House said now sitting with his stomach exposed.

"You're going to have to pull your pants down," Wilson said.

"Hell no," House said.

"Do it otherwise you'll be wearing boxers the rest of the day," Wilson said.

"Fine," House said pulling down his jeans and boxers.

"Thank you," Wilson said applying jell to House's stomach.

"What don't' like to see a guy with their pants down?" House asked seeing that Cameron had looked away.

"It's not that I was just trying to be nice," Cameron said.

"Hmm," House said.

"What?" Cuddy asked when she heard Wilson take in a deep breath.

"Well I was right," Wilson said moving the screen so the others could see it too.

"What the hell? How can that be?" House asked sitting up a little bit.

House and the others saw that House was in fact pregnant still.

"I don't know but you're still pregnant," Wilson said smiling.

"I thought he lost it," Chase said.

"So did I," Cuddy said.

"Well he didn't. I don't know how but he didn't," Wilson said still smiling.

"You realize you have to go off your vicodin again don't you?" Cameron asked.

"Yeah here comes with drawl time," House said faking happiness.

"Don't worry you won't have to go through with it alone," Cameron said.

"Yeah I'll be there to help you," Wilson said cleaning off House's stomach.

"You left buddy. So you're out now," House said.

"House!" Cuddy exclaimed.

"Cuddy!" House exclaimed.

"Stop acting like a child. You know what'll happen with the with drawl. You need someone to be there with you," Wilson said.

"I know that you better say the yell away from my place," House said.

"Come on House you need someone. You think Foreman's going to stay with you?" Wilson asked as he was putting House back into his wheelchair.

"Hey," Foreman said.

"You're really going to stay up with him when he's throwing up at two in the morning and running a fever?" Wilson asked.

"I didn't say I was," Foreman said.

"See," Wilson said.

"I don't need anyone," House said.

"I bet if Stacy wanted to stay with you you'd be changing your mind," Wilson said.

"Shove it," House said going out of the door.

"Knew it," Wilson said.

"I said shove it!" House exclaimed.

"I'll get the vicodin and Chase can get the liquor," Cameron said.

"Thanks," Wilson said.

"I heard that," House said.

"Yeah I bet," Wilson said.

They'd spoke low enough that there was no way House could have heard.

By the end of the day Wilson had all of House's vicodin and alcohol in his office. Right now he was figuring out what to do with the vicodin so House couldn't get to it again. He decided that he'd take to his hotel room and flush it down his toilet.

As soon as Wilson got to the hotel he flushed the vicodin and dumped the liquor down the drain so that he knew House couldn't get to it. He'd have to bring a new bottle and Foreman wouldn't let him.

Foreman, Wilson, Cuddy, Stacy, Chase, and Cameron had all decided that if House was going to try and destruct himself then he was doing on his own they weren't letting him take the baby down too. And he was going to have to do it while sober.

NEXT CHAPTER: What does House have up his sleeve?