Title: What the Hell?

Summary: House puts his foot into his mouth this time.

Author: Mikesh

Part: 20
Warning: Mpreg for later chapters so if you don't like then please don't read.

Disclaimer: Don't own House but I wish I did.

AN: This chapter takes place November 23rd

"Damn it!" House yelled from his bedroom.

"What?" Wilson shouted from the bathroom.

"Nothing," House said.

House was finding that there wasn't much that still fit him. A lot of his pants were starting to get tighter then they used to be. Today was not a good day for that to be happening. It was only two days until Thanksgiving and his parents had decided to come see him. He really didn't want to face them because he had yet to tell them about the baby. Thankfully for Greg if he didn't want to tell them about the baby he didn't have to. He wasn't big enough that his parents would know something major was up. You could tell that he had put on weight but he wasn't showing yet.

"Come on we need to get going," Wilson said knocking on the bedroom door.

"Yeah in a minute," House said.

"Now," Wilson said.

They were already running five minutes late and he didn't want to be later then he had to be.

"Fine," House said coming out of his room.

"What the hell are you wearing?" Wilson asked chuckling.

The pants that House was wearing were too big around the middle along with the shirts and jacket.

"Clothes," House said limping out of the bedroom.

"Ever hear of a belt?" Wilson asked.

"Piss off," House said going to the door.

"Looks like someone needs to go shopping," Wilson said laughing at House's appearance.

"Ok go fuck off," House said.

"Touchy," Wilson said.

"Screw you," House said.

Instead of replying Wilson just rolled his eyes at House. He was starting to get use to the verbal abuse that House had been on lately.

After House got to his office he got himself a cup of tea. Since coffee was out he'd taken up tea drinking.

"Washer stretch your clothes?" Foreman asked.

"No I got them from your momma," House said heading back to his office.

"You need new clothes," Cameron said coming into House's office.

"So do you," House said.

"My don't look like they're about to fall off any moment," Cameron said.

"No you just look like you're about to fall out," House said.

"Wait until you get that way," Cameron said walking back into the conference room.

Most of the day was spent working on a case so no one really had to listen to House because they weren't in the office.

"What are you doing in here?" House asked looking up to see Wilson coming in.

"Here," Wilson said setting down a plat of greens.

"Not eating that," House said.

"Eat up. It's steak," Wilson said.

"Still not eating something you got me," House said.

"What because I told you, you need to go shopping?" Wilson asked.

"Maybe," House said.

"Cut the drama queen act. Think what your parents will say if they saw you in the baggy clothes," Wilson said.

"Still not going," House said.

"That's fine you can explain to your parents why your clothes are two times too big for you," Wilson said.

"I'll just tell them that my roommate can't do laundry. He stretched my favorite pair of pants," House said.

"You would," Wilson said.

"Thanks," House said smiling at him.

"Got to go," Wilson said leaving but before he did he grabbed for House's steak.

"Leave the food. Pregnant remember?" House asked while slapping Wilson's hand.

"Fine," Wilson said pulling his hand back.

One day before Thanksgiving found House shopping for bigger clothes. He didn't want to get too big because his parents would notice. He only got a couple pairs of jeans and some shirts. He was going to get more later when he really needed them. For right now he decided he'd squeeze into his old jeans. He wasn't ready to put his size 16 away and get a size 20 or bigger which House shuttered to think about. He did get some winter shirts since it would be colder soon.

Thanksgiving day…

Usually at this time of year House would be sitting on his couch eating a TV dinner and drinking beer. This year wasn't much different. He was sitting on his couch while watching football and eating a TV dinner but he wasn't drinking beer. Wilson was in the kitchen making dinner with the help of Stacy. House's excuse was because he was pregnant. Really he'd just gotten in Stacy's way so she'd kicked him out of the kitchen.

"You know you could go get dressed," Stacy said popping her head out of the kitchen.

"I could but what's the fun in that?" House asked.

"How about the fact that Cameron's going to be here?" Stacy asked.

"They're not coming. They're going to go see her parents," House said.

"Foreman's going to be here," Stacy said.

"Going with his girlfriend out of town," House said.

"How about your mom?" Stacy asked.

"She's seen worse," House said.

"How about me?" Stacy asked.

That finally got House off his ass and into the bathroom to get ready.

"You do know that none of them were planning on coming right?" Wilson asked.

"Yes but he doesn't," Stacy said smiling.

"True," Wilson said.

"Here are you happy?" House asked coming in wearing his usual work clothes.

"Thank you," Stacy said giving House a peck on the cheek.

"Oh look you finally got my boyfriend to wear an apron and very sexy one at that," House said.

"Fuck off," Wilson said not in the mood.

"Testy too," House said.

"Go watch your football," Stacy said.

"Bye ladies," House said limping back into the living room.

"At least I'm not the one that has to explain to my parents why there's a kid going to be popping out of me in six months time," Wilson shouted while smirking.

That shut House up fast. Wilson didn't get to see how much House paled when Wilson said that.. House hadn't realized that it was only six months away. Really six months? Not that long when you sit and ponder it like House was.

"House can you get that?" Stacy asked.

"Sure," House said getting up to go answer the door.

"Hi honey," Liz House's mom said giving him a hug.

"Hi," House said hugging her back.

"What's wrong?" Liz asked coming into the room.

"Nothing," House said.

"Dad," House said.

"Son," Jack said.

After House got done with his hugs and kisses he led them into the kitchen to introduce them to the other two.

"Mom I'd like you to meet Wilson and Stacy," House said.

"Honey what is he doing wearing a pink apron?" Liz asked whispering to House.

"He likes to wear them," House said loud enough that Wilson could hear.

"Nice to meet you both," Wilson said sticking his hand out.

"Nice to meet you too," Liz said.

"Wilson your apron," Stacy said chuckling.

"Oh yeah sorry about that. This is all I could find," Wilson said.

"Stacy left it when she left and never came and got it," House explained seeing his mother's questioning look.

"Do you want me to set the wine in the refrigerator?" Liz asked.

"Yeah you can," House said knowing that he'd now have to explain why he couldn't drink to his mother.

"Is there something I can help you with?" Liz asked.

"We've got it. Greg take your parents into the living room," Stacy said.

"Ok parents follow me," House said.

After a few minutes of silence Stacy poked her head out of the kitchen.

"Supper," Stacy said.

"Thank God," House said knowing that'd save him from having to talk to his dad.

"Who wants wine?" Wilson asked bring out the wine.

"I would dear," Liz said.

"Mr. House?" Wilson asked.

"Yes please son," Jack said.

"Stacy?" Wilson asked.

"Yeah," Stacy said.

"Here House," Wilson said handing House a glass of tea.

"Thanks," House said.

"Dear you're not drinking?" Liz asked.

"No," House said.

"Why not?" Liz asked.

"Let's say prayer and then I'll tell you," House said.

"Ok," Liz said.

So House led prayer.

"Ok since you'll find out sooner or later you're going to have a grandson or granddaughter in six month's time," House said.

"Congratulations dear," Liz said looking at Stacy.

"It's not her mother. It's me," House said not looking his mom in the face.

"Are you trying to tell me that you're pregnant?" Jack asked.

"Not trying to tell you. I am telling you," House said.

"This is barbaric. Men can't get pregnant," Jack said.

"Well I did dad," House said.

"How?" Liz

"You're actually going with this woman?" Jack asked.

"Maybe he's telling the truth," Liz said.

"He's a male woman. He can't get pregnant," Jack said standing up.

"I got pregnant because a patient came into the clinic two months ago and did a spell on me. Now thanks to Wilson who happened to be the first person to touch me I'm pregnant," House said looking at Wilson.

"What?" Jack asked.

"He hit my elbow and now I'm pregnant. How exactly I don't know," House said.

"I want nothing to do with this freakiness," Jack said leaving the house.

"Excuse me," House said getting up from the table.

"And that's why he didn't want to tell his parents," Wilson said.

"Well I thought he should so that they know what's going on," Stacy said.

"Still here," Liz said.

"Sorry," Stacy and Wilson said at the same time.

"It's ok. I'm just going to go check on Gregory," Liz said getting up.

While Liz was doing that Wilson went to see if he could find Jack. He wasn't going to start anything with him but he didn't want House's father never to get to know his grandchild. Wilson couldn't find Jack so he went back into the house to find House at the kitchen table.

"Take it you went looking for him and he's gone?" House asked.

"Yeah," Wilson said seeing that House had in fact been crying.

"Don't' worry about it. If he doesn't' want to be around then he doesn't need to be," House said turning to anger.

"Greg you know your father loves you," Liz said.

"Yeah he really love me. He just walks out but he loves me," House said.

"This is new for him. Let him get used to," Liz said.

"And it isn't new for me?" House asked getting up.

"Honey I know it is for you too. But you've had a while to get used to the idea. We've only had a couple of minutes," Liz said sticking up for her husband.

"And if it had been Stacy then you would be happy and we'd be going on with supper. But because it's me it's weird and shouldn't be happening," House said getting really angry now.

"House!" Wilson said.

"Stay out of this!" House said turning his angry on Wilson.

"House!" Stacy said seeing that he was heading towards the floor.

"Oh my God what's wrong with my baby?" Liz asked scared for her son.

"He's blood pressure is high call the ambulance," Wilson shouted to Stacy.

She called them and gave them all of the information that Wilson was giving her. After the ambulance came they got House loaded and took him to PPTH.

"What's wrong with him?" Liz asked seeing a doctor coming up to them.

"Can we talk in private?" Cuddy asked.

"What is it?" Stacy asked scared.

"Cuddy?" Wilson asked when she didn't answer.

"Does she know?" Cuddy asked.

"About him being…? Yeah she knows," Wilson said looking at his stomach he didn't want to say pregnant in case someone over heard them.

"Ok from what we can tell he just got himself a little over excited. I'd like to keep him tonight but you know how he is. So I want him to stay in bed for 24 hours and he's not to show up for work tomorrow. Which ever of you two that wants off you have it," Cuddy said.

"What about the?" Stacy asked looking down at her stomach.

"Fine as far as we can tell. He just needs to stop stressing himself out," Cuddy said.

"Sorry docotro that was my husband and my fault," Liz said.

"It's ok," Cuddy said seeing that Liz was upset.

"So is he awake?" Stacy asked.

"Yeah he is now," Wilson said seeing House coming with a IV down the hall.

"House what are you doing out of bed?" Cuddy asked.

"Going home," House said.

"Go get dressed first," Stacy said.

"What no trying to keep me here?" House asked.

"No because you're on bed rest for 24 hours and you are not to show up to work tomorrow," Cuddy said.

"Yes mom," House said heading back to his room.

"Ha-ha very funny House," Cuddy said.

"I thought so," House said.

Instead of replying Cuddy just rolled her eyes at him.

After House got dressed they headed back to the house. Where House was put into bed with strict orders if he so much as stepped a toe out of bed then he'd be on clinic duty for a month. Of course that did work but House did put up a fight.

While Stacy and Wilson were warming up supper House told his mom what had happened to him. She was upset that he hadn't told her but she knew that was just like her son to she might as well get used to it.

After supper was warmed up Stacy and Wilson took it to House's room where they all enjoyed supper. Liz went back to the hotel that night to find that her husband had left and went home. She decided that she'd deal with him later right now she was going to be there for her son.

It had been decided more by Liz then anyone else that she'd stay with House while the other two were at work. That way they didn't have to miss work. Now all she had to do was figure out how to keep Greg in bed all day. Because knowing him he'd get out but act like he hadn't so that he didn't have to do clink duty for a month straight.

NEXT CHAPTER: Month 4

AN2: ok now got a couple of questions for y'all.

should House's child be a boy or girl?

The name of the child? First and Middle

Should the child's last name be:

a) Wilson

b) House

c) Wilson-House

d) House-Wilson

e) any name you can come up with using the letters of their last names

AN3: Sex of Cameron and Chase's children

Also names first and middle.

Thanks for the help