A/N: Thank you to BabyNake, Phantomgirl24, sharp52092, and FleshofMidnight for the reviews on the last chapter, I appreciate them very much!
Over the next few days, Christine made the final preparations for her concert, while trying to avoid thinking of what had happened - or rather, not happened - between her and Erik after their voice lesson. He had texted her the next day, asking if he could see her and Gustave again, and while she still had no idea what her long-term thoughts on the matter were, she hadn't had the heart to tell him no.
The four of them went on a few more outings together, taking Gustave to the playground and back for pizza and ice cream. With this additional time spent together, Christine noticed that Erik seemed to be growing more comfortable around Gustave, and in turn Gustave responded to that, continuing to warm up to Erik.
And Christine had to admit, every time she saw Erik do something like push Gustave on the swings at the park, or seriously admire his coloring at the restaurant, something clicked in her heart that she couldn't deny. Even though it was bittersweet knowing that it was only Erik's bad decisions that had kept him out of Gustave's life up until now, seeing the two of them start to form a bond spoke to some part of Christine in a way she couldn't fully articulate yet, even to herself.
Erik also arranged for her and Gustave to have a playdate with Nadir's wife and son, who Mamma and Gustave had met previously, but Christine had not. They had met at the playground, and the two boys had hit it off almost instantly, which made Christine happy, as she often worried that Gustave didn't get to spend as much time with other children as she would like due to all the traveling they did for her performance schedule.
Christine felt like she and Rookheeya had made a connection, as well. She had always liked Nadir, but hadn't gotten to know him extremely well in Paris, and had never had the opportunity to meet Rookheeya there, but in just a few minutes of talking to the other woman she had a feeling that they could easily become friends. They parted that afternoon with the promise that they would see each other at the reception after Christine's gala concert, and she was already looking forward to seeing the other woman again.
She and Erik even found time to get in one more short lesson before her concert, and while it went very well, there was no repeat of the almost-kiss from their previous lesson. In fact, possibly because it was the first time she and Erik had been alone together since that day, Christine felt that he was making a point to keep himself somewhat apart from her - and she was doing the same.
If Christine felt slightly hurt that Erik was being so careful to give no hint that he might want to kiss her this time, no doubt that was just her pride talking. She didn't want to kiss him either, obviously. In fact, it was definitely for the best that he had pulled away from her the other day - taking things down that road was certain to lead to disaster for them both.
xxxxx
The day before Christine's gala concert, she and Erik took Gustave out for a drive by themselves, as Mamma had elected to stay behind and have a day to herself, since she would soon be handling Gustave's care on her own much more once Christine started rehearsals for the summer opera season. At Gustave's request, they started their outing by returning to the cemetery complex, to Christine's slight bewilderment. She wouldn't have thought it would be a four-year-old's choice of entertainment, but she supposed it was a reminder that Erik and Gustave appeared to have more in common than she had even realized before they met.
As they exited the vehicle at the cemetery, Christine noticed her son's gaze focused on the teenagers riding dirt bikes on the hills on the far side of the cemetery. "Wow," he uttered, seeming transfixed by their activity.
"Do you like dirt bikes, Gustave?" Erik asked, as Christine's gaze shot to him. Surely he wouldn't-
"Yeah!" Gustave responded enthusiastically, gaze still trained on the teenagers in the distance.
"Maybe I can buy you one, then," the man who she had somehow ended up having a child with said to her son, before he noticed the death glare that Christine was no doubt giving him.
To his credit, Erik apparently realized from her expression that he had crossed a line, because Christine saw him appear to cringe slightly. "I mean, maybe when you're old enough, and of course only if your mother says it's all right."
"My mom said I can have a dirt bike when I turn five," Gustave responded out of the blue before Christine could say anything, causing her to briefly close her eyes and send a plea to the heavens for help in dealing with these two.
"Gustave! I have said no such thing!"
"Oh, I thought you did," he replied nonchalantly, and Christine suddenly didn't know if she was more amused or annoyed. It seemed her son had certainly inherited his father's propensity to adjust the truth to his purposes.
"You know I didn't. And this is something we can talk about when you're much older - as in when you're an appropriate age to consider getting a dirt bike."
Thankfully, Gustave seemed to accept that as the end of the conversation, content to reach up and grab Erik's hand before dragging him to the portion of the cemetery that he wanted to explore, leaving Christine to trail along behind them, lost in her thoughts.
xxxxx
After the cemetery, Erik drove them back to the lake, also at Gustave's request. Apparently Reza had told him during their playdate that he had seen a moose there before - which was confirmed by Erik when Gustave brought it up - and now Gustave was convinced that they would see one if they went back, even though Erik tried to tell him that such sightings were rare.
However, if he was being honest, he was just happy to have an excuse to spend more time with both Gustave and Christine - anything that allowed him additional time in their company was fine with Erik. And thankfully, once they arrived it turned out that there were only a few other people taking in the views at the lake, so he didn't have to be subjected to too many unwanted stares from curious strangers.
After Gustave had accepted the fact that there was no moose to be seen today, the three of them started walking, following the trail that ran around the edge of the lake, with Gustave in between Erik and Christine. Casually, he reached up and took hold of each one of their hands nearest him, causing Erik's heart to jolt with the simple gesture. He knew that Gustave still had no concept of their actual relationship, and that the boy simply saw him as a friend of his mother's who joined them to do fun things, but Erik still couldn't help but feel like they were growing closer when shown this evidence that Gustave was beginning to trust him.
After they walked for a bit in what seemed like a peaceful silence to Erik, he noticed Gustave starting to get restless a few moments before he asked, "Is it okay if I run on ahead, Mom?"
Erik noticed that Christine started slightly at Gustave's words, seeming to have been lost in thought. "Oh, yes, that's fine. As long as you don't get too far ahead of us, and listen if we tell you to stop or come back. Also, don't bother anyone else."
"Okay!" Gustave agreed enthusiastically, already scampering ahead only to stop at a small pile of rocks near the path. As Erik watched him bend down to inspect them more closely, he felt Christine's hand brush against his. Embarrassed, he pulled his hand away, chastising himself for being so absorbed in Gustave's antics that he had invaded Christine's personal space. He just had to hope it hadn't upset her too much, especially in light of how well things had been going between them.
While he was still chastising himself for his unintentional misstep, Erik felt Christine's hand brush against his once again. Startled, his gaze shot to her, but she was staring straight ahead, a tiny frown line visible on her forehead above the sunglasses she was wearing. Hoping he wasn't misreading the situation, Erik slowly turned his hand toward hers as he let his fingers unfurl, feeling a jolt in the vicinity of his heart when Christine hesitantly slipped her small hand into his.
Stunned and confused, Erik turned his gaze ahead of them again, noting that Christine still hadn't looked at him at all. Refocusing on Gustave, he saw that the boy had run ahead again, probably with a few rocks in his pocket now, judging from their recent experiences together. Unsure what he had done to cause Christine to want to hold his hand but not wanting to do anything to make her regret doing so, Erik decided his best course of action was to stay silent.
Christine apparently felt no need for words either, as she remained just as quiet as he did, Erik noticed. But, whatever urge had motivated her to reach for his hand in the first place apparently hadn't waned, because she continued to grasp his firmly while they both stared straight ahead, watching their son as he ran on the path in front of them.
xxxxx
The following evening, Christine sat in front of the mirror in her dressing room at the opera house, giving her hair and makeup one last look before she took to the stage, but her thoughts continued drifting to Erik and what had happened between them yesterday. Or rather, what she had done when she had impulsively taken hold of his hand on their walk.
On the outside, she looked completely ready to perform - her makeup was finished, her hair straightened into a sleek look, and she knew her elegant black dress was perfect for the evening - but on the inside, she felt the total opposite. Flexing her right hand slightly, Christine couldn't help but recall how perfectly right it had felt in the moment yesterday for her to reach out and slip it into Erik's. But now, she was just as confused as ever when it came to her feelings for him.
She had realized that she couldn't deny the yearning she felt toward Erik any longer, but that feeling was complicated by the fact that she was also still mad at him. And as if those two emotions weren't confusing enough, Christine was having trouble reading Erik's feelings toward her. Did he even want her any longer, or was he only interested in hearing her sing and getting to know Gustave? And why did she care?
She hadn't heard from Erik since the day before, but there had been a beautiful arrangement of two dozen blood-red roses waiting for her in her dressing room. Even though there was no card with them, Christine had no doubt as to who they were from - only doubts about what they might mean.
Standing, she took one last look at herself in the mirror, knowing that it was nearly time to go onstage and that she still hadn't made a decision about a very important part of the evening - whether or not she was going to sing the aria that Erik had written specifically for her to perform.
She and Andrew had prepared for the concert with the possibility of her either performing the song or not - Christine had told him that she would let him know in the moment what her decision was, and to his credit, he had accepted not knowing what their final song of the night would be for certain without comment.
It still felt like an impossible choice to Christine. If she sang Erik's song, it felt like a victory for him - as if after all this time, he merely had to clap his hands to get her to do his bidding, and she resented the thought of giving him that satisfaction. But, in the part of her soul that lived and breathed music, she wanted nothing more than to perform his song. Despite all the hurts that lay between them, no one could ever understand her voice like Erik could, and a part of Christine wanted to give in to that connection between them, to revel in it.
Taking a deep breath, she exited the dressing room and headed toward the stage, feeling the weight of her impending decision hovering over her. Whichever option she chose, it felt as though she was about to embark on a path that could change the direction of her life.
If only she knew what she wanted that direction to be, Christine reflected wryly as she stepped out onto the stage to the applause of the audience waiting for her.
A/N: Thank you for reading! As always, any comments are greatly appreciated!