Doubt with the Dawn
Summary: In the dawn of the day the Fellowship sets out, a father frets, while another doubts. But each can find solace in the other, as a father discovers a son. Vignette. NONSLASH
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Well except a few dimes and nickles and my extensive book collection. All characters places belong to Tolkein. Awesome dude! (Think if I ask nice he'll let me have Legolas?)
Spoilers: Teensy-tiny hints about Cassia & Siobhan's "Mellon Chronicles" which are TOTALLY awesome and you should go and read them. http/www.aragorn-legolas. Like MC, but if you dont read 'em then
1) Aragorn was raised in Rivendell and became a son to Elrond and brother to Elladan and Elrohir named Estel. Arwen was in Lothlorien in his childhood so no creepy incest there.
2) Legolas and Aragorn met long time before LOTR. Best of buds they are. Brother to each other they seem. (heehee Yoda impersonation!)
3) Since trouble always meets Aragorn and Legolas and they'd go to Elrond for he healing cuz he's the shiz-nit, Elrond became very fond of Legolas.
Ok I'm done. Oh, btw, this hasnt been beta'd. Sorry , I'm not sure how that stuff works. Ok on with the show...
The day dawned bright and crisp over the elven stronghold of Imladris, or Rivendell to some, illuminating its Lord, Elrond Half-Elven, with the feeble light of dawn. Though early, the elf lord was contentedly strolling one of the more private gardens of his home. This was no peaceful stroll through a garden of peace. In fact, he was not even aware where he was going, so consumed he was by his thoughts and feelings. For the thoughts of the elf lord were ones of worry. And not just any worry. The most irrational, yet powerful kind: the worry of a father's heart.
The council had met yesterday and today was the day the Fellowship was to set out on their quest to rid Middle Earth of the evil of Sauron. Among them was the human Aragorn. But in Elrond's mind, he would forever remain Estel, foster child of Imladris and a son in all aspects of significance to Elrond. He knew this day would come, the day that Estel would set out to claim and embrace his destiny. The Lord in him knew this, but it did not keep the father in him from becoming almost sick with fear. Elrond knew what awaited those in the Fellowship and he knew the consequences to Middle Earth and its Free Folk should it fail. But he could no keep himself from fearing most of all for the life of his youngest son. At the moment he could spare no worry, for his son was all he cared so deeply for.
Sensing he was no longer alone, Elrond drew himself from his musings and noticed another being nestled at the base of the tallest oak of the garden. Amending his thoughts to himself, he remembered another embarking on this quest, who was almost, if not as, dear to him as his human son. Approaching the still form of the elf before him, Elrond fondly smiled at the way the tree seemed to almost cradle the wood-elf. The closer Elrond got to him the more he was sure that the elf was not asleep due to the tenseness of his shoulders as he had presumed. He was unsure of the fact because Elrond was approaching from the other side of the tree and could not see his face. Concern began to take hold at the tenseness. "Legolas?" he queried softly, so as not to wake him if the elf lord was wrong. His concern deepened when the golden-haired elf was visibly startled, not something he did often. Clear, blue eyes met his when the younger elf turned to see who had caught him so unawares. Elrond withheld a chuckle as recognition of the speaker made Legolas literally leap to his feet. "Good morning Lord Elrond," he replied softly, placing his hand on his forehead. At this Elrond could not hold back a smile.
"Oh penneth," he said fondly, "too many times have I patched you up after an adventure with Estel or the twins for you to be so formal."
"Forgive me. I fear I am not myself," Legolas replied looking away to the East, a troubled look on his face.
"Legolas?" Elrond questioned, all traces of amusement gone from his demeanor. "What is wrong?" "I'm fine" was the expected reply from the stubborn prince; however, when it did not come, Elrond became deeply worried. Legolas was never one to admit weakness whether injury or fears, not that Elrond saw this as weakness, nor any other who knew the relatively young elf. For Legolas to not outright deny that anything was wrong, showed how wrong something was. Legolas's voice cut through these thoughts.
"Begging your pardon, sire, but I fear you have made a great mistake," he said softly, still not meeting the eyes of one of two people who could read him through his eyes. This comment only proceeded to confuse the elder elf though. Unsure of what Legolas spoke or where the conversation headed, Elrond trusted that he would understand soon enough?
"What mistake do you speak of?" he asked quietly still, as though both were afraid to break the stillness of the early morning. It was with this question that Legolas finally met Elrond's eyes. Had he not been living for millennia, Elrond may have staggered at the emotions in the younger elf's eyes.
Emotion swirled in the clear blue eyes of the young prince, but the two main emotions were fear and doubt. Understanding began to creep into Elrond as he stared into the young elf's depths.
"Me! hir nin," Legolas finally replied. "Surely another, like Glorfindel or even one of the twins, should be sent to represent the firstborn. Someone older, someone with more experience, someone… better," Legolas finished his tirade quietly, the last word spoken almost heartbrokenly. At this tone, a small part of Elrond's heart contracted tightly with paternal affection.
"Ai Greenleaf," he sighed reaching to brush Legolas's cheek with the back of his hand. But before he could continue, a pleading voice and two pleading eyes.
"Lord Elrond," he pleaded. "I am fearful."
This admission stilled Elrond once more. Never before had Elrond heard the proud prince so willingly and clearly admit to being afraid.
"I do not think I am the most able to represent our people, or help save Middle-Earth, or… or" he stuttered to a stop.
Deciding to address the concerns all at once he pressed the younger elf for the entire truth. "Or what penneth?" he asked.
"Protect Estel," he admitted shamefully, dropping his gaze from the elf lord, who was the father of the one he feared he could not protect. Since his gaze was lowered, he could not see the smile coming to the older elf's face or the affection radiating from his gaze.
"Oh Greenleaf," Elrond sighed. "Look at me penneth." Eventually shimmering blue eyes rose to meet the dark, wise eyes of the elf Lord. Confusion swam in Legolas's eyes at the tone of voice and long unused nickname that Elrond used. Before continuing Elrond placed both of his hands onto Legolas's shoulders, "Listen to an elf wiser and older than you," Elrond quietly and gently commanded, raising his eyebrow slightly, almost daring the young prince to make a comment on his age. Legolas, still in serious doubt and noticing the "look" that Elrond gave him, wisely chose not to say anything on that subject. He merely waited for him to continue. "You are Legolas, son of Thranduil, Crown Prince of Mirkwood, leader of your troops in many battles. You are more than qualified to represent our people. But think back to all of your many, many adventures with my youngest. You two have faced orcs, wights, and even the Witch King. The most important title you carry with you on this Quest is gwador to Estel. You are a brother to him in all but blood. I know that you would do all in your power to see him and this Quest to safety. I know this because you are gwador to Estel, which makes you a son to me. And truly, after all these years patching you up and watching you grow from the scared, young elf I met in Dorolyn to the powerful warrior you are today, that is how I feel, ion nin." By the time Elrond had finished his mini-speech, tears were streaming down Legolas's face. Elrond brought his hand up to wipe the tears away from the young elf's face. Overwhelmed with emotion, Legolas practically threw himself into Elrond's arms. Having not expected this reaction, Elrond staggered almost imperceptibly, before wrapping his arms around the softly sobbing prince. Elrond knew that Legolas had needed to do this for some time and he felt honored that Legolas chose to drop his stoic mask and accept his comfort. The elf Lord, nay at that time he was merely a father, felt tears come to his eyes at the heartbreaking yet quiet cries coming from his "borrowed" son.
Many minutes passed before Legolas quieted and pulled away. Elrond let him pull away but, upon seeing the apology in his eyes, forestalled the speaking of that apology. "No, ion nin. Do not apologize. I do believe you needed that."
"Aye. I cannot say that I did not … Ada," Legolas replied smiling again, the sparkle back into his eyes. Tears sprung to Elrond's eyes at the title coming from Legolas. They both knew he would not say it often and that he was in no way renouncing his own father, but is sounded so sweet coming from one so dear.
"… May the power of elves, and Men, and all Free Folk go with you." As Elrond spoke he met the eyes of each member, holding the gaze of two special ones. As both Estel and Legolas, swept their hands out from their hearts, he smiled. His sons would be fine. He had no foreseen knowledge on this fact, but they had each other and they had his love with them. That was all they needed.