Forgive My Hesitation

Rating: M for language, violence

Disclaimer: I don't own a thing you recognize.. That should cover it properly.

Spoilers: From RAW, January 2nd.. A few on back and up to RAW, January 16th… just not like you might expect.

Eventual Pairings: Lita/John Cena, Stacy/Chris Masters, Lilian/Batista, Victoria/Tyson Tomko, Trish/Jeff, Candice/Not telling, Maria/Not Telling

Summary: When Lita takes a stand, she finds help from friends and from people that she never would have expected.

Notes: main event covered in this chapter….and the aftermath of said main event.. Just keep in mind, from this point on, everything on RAW and Smackdown is my way.

-x-x-x-

With Victoria's help, and the additional help from a pair of scissors 'borrowed' from the trainers room, Lita was able to modify the already modified jersey to her liking. The jersey in question was one of the baseball style, button down and short sleeved.. And now, it was just a little bit more short sleeved, the length of the jersey shortened so it reached her waist, the jersey then tied like the referee's uniform…or at least the women's version anyway, exposing the redhead's naval. But, the two women hadn't stopped there, the redhead about to cut the pair of jeans she had been wearing until Victoria had another idea…leaving the locker room long enough to head to Maria's locker room…and returning with a pair of short jean shorts. Of course, Lita excused herself to the bathroom area of the locker room, applying the body makeup she always kept with her to any exposed parts of her legs and arms once she had gotten dressed. A frown crossed the redhead's face when she had done that, wishing that she didn't have to do it but knowing that she had to. Otherwise people would start asking questions and she wasn't quite ready to answer those questions yet. True enough, getting away from Edge had just been a part of it all, just one piece of the puzzle that was herself. And she was free to some extent, yes, but she wasn't truly free. She could still hear him, telling her she was useless, nothing but a whore.. And she could still see him, coming after her…attacking her relentlessly, ignoring her pleas for him to stop. Lita hated that…hated the fact that he still had some measure of control over her, hated that she needed to lie to her friends.. Both to keep them safe and to keep herself…well she couldn't say that it had kept her safe because it hadn't. It never got worse, but, it never got better either, the diva plagued by nightmares. And one of those nightmares had woken up Chris last night, the young wrestler nearly tripping over his own feet in his rush to get to her…calmed her down and tried not to look hurt when she told him it was nothing. Chris who, up until two months ago, had been nothing more than a co-worker until he was dragged into the situation thanks to her overly paranoid brother. Now, Lita didn't know what she would do without him. A knock at the bathroom door shook her from her thoughts, Victoria's concerned voice following shortly after…the diva shaking out her arms before she stepped out.

Lita looked down at her attire, then to her friend. "Well? What's the verdict?"

Victoria frowned thoughtfully, scrutinizing the redhead before her.. "It looks better than I thought it would, actually." Her nose wrinkled a touch, "and incredibly out of place."

Lita rolled her eyes, "yeah well.. I can't exactly call for my hip-hop fairy godmother. But, Vince did say, my new wardrobe would be a diva version of what Cena wears and…I think this fits his specifications…kind of, anyway."

The older woman shook her head, "somehow, I don't think Vince will appreciate it too much, since you did ruin that jersey." Victoria smirked, "your brother is going to hate it though." She rolled her eyes when Lita shot her a questioning look, "I can remember you telling me how much he complained about the stuff you wore to ringside with that bastard…and when you had your thong showing. Girl, you're showing a lot of skin."

The redhead grinned, "then I know it's right.. Come on Vicki, he's my older brother, he'd be happiest if I went out to ringside wearing sweatpants and a sweatshirt." Shrugging, she grabbed her bag, "but there's only one way to find out and that's to show him…so let's go."

Having said that, the two women left the locker room…running right into Triple H, the blond man raising an eyebrow. "Who are you and what have you done with Lita?"

Lita rolled her eyes, "stop being a dork, Hunter.. Mr. McMahon told me that my wardrobe had to change a little since I'm Cena's manager. I kept his suggestion in mind, but, my way."

The man smirked, "somehow I doubt this what he had in mind but.." Hunter smiled, "you look great, Red. And a hell of a lot happier than I've seen you. Dave is going to flip, though."

"I know," the redhead replied breezily, "and if he's in shock.. Then I did something right."

Hunter shook his head at the mischievous look on her face, offering an arm to the two women as they made their way back to Chris' locker room, the apparent gathering spot for the evening.

Chris sent a look over to Cena, "from what I understand, and if Stephanie can have her way, the match will be changed to a tag-team mid-way through. I owe that lard ass some anyway, so, I'll team with you if it happens."

John nodded easily to that, "I appreciate it man, but I ain't holding my breath on it.. Since Bitchoff is in charge of creative and whateva'."

The younger man shrugged, "yeah well, Stephanie's pushing to become General Manager of RAW.. Or for her dad to appoint someone temporarily until the rosters join up."

Randy sent him a questioning look, "how do you know all of this?"

"Stacy told me.. She's working as Stephanie's assistant until they can find a role for her on one of the shows." Shrugging slightly, he added: "that's why I got held up earlier.. She's hanging out with Trish and Maria now though."

Randy smirked, just starting to say something when the door to the locker room opened, Dave sending a look over as Hunter appeared, "where's my sister?"

Hunter held up his hands in mock defense, "relax big guy.. I went down to Vicki's locker room just like you asked.. And I found Victoria--"

"Stop being an asshole and move, Hunter."

The blond man tossed an annoyed look over his shoulder, "you know Vicki, you're ruining my surprise."

Victoria rolled her eyes as she entered the room, "yeah? Well did you ever think that Edge could be around? What if he saw her, then what?"

"Then I introduce him to my fists," Hunter replied calmly, reaching behind him then. "But enough talk, here's someone who looks like your sister but I'm not sure if it's really her."

Dave was on his feet almost instantly as Lita walked in, "what in the blue hell are you wearing?"

Hunter blinked, "since when did you start stealing the Rock's catchphrases?"

Dave shot him a pointed look, "you…shut up," glancing to Randy, "you…be quiet." His gaze slid back to his sister, "and you.. I'll ask again, what are you wearing?"

The redhead rolled her eyes, "it's what I'm supposed to be wearing to ringside.. Just a little modified."

"That's for damn sure," a voice muttered, John holding up his hands in defense when Dave glared. "I didn' mean anything bad by that bro.. Back off."

Lita put her hands on her hips, "Dave. I'm not a little girl anymore. And so what if I'm showing a little skin, it's not any worse than what I was wearing before and at least this time, I'm willingly wearing it."

Dave frowned, "I know that Li but.. You just.. You look.."

"Damn fucking hot."

While Dave sent over another glare in Cena's direction, Lita grinned. "Thank you, that's what I was going for." Glancing back to her brother, the diva shrugged. "He doesn't have a problem with it--"

"You'd have to have no pulse not to."

"Hunter.. Shut up." Dave turned his attention back to his little sister, "Li.. I know you aren't a little girl anymore but--"

The redhead set a hand on her brother's arm, "I know.. You're my big brother and you're going to worry.. I expect that from you.. Dave, I'll always be your little sister, but I'm not a little girl. And you know I wasn't happy when you suggested that crazy contract change, but I trusted you.. As much as my judgment has been misguided, trust me.. I know what I'm doing."

Dave let out a small sigh at that, but nodded anyway, reaching out to take his sister in his arms.. The siblings separating when the tell tale sound of a camera was heard, Hunter tossing Randy's camera phone back as the Animal shot him a withering glare.

"Hunter.. I'm going to kill you."

The blond man shrugged, "what can I say? It was true Kodak moment."

-x-x-x-

Hunter was momentarily spared from Dave's wrath when Stephanie knocked on the door, informing the occupants of the locker room that while she couldn't get the match changed to a tag-team, it would now be no-disqualifications. After she had left, Dave sent a pointed look over to Chris Masters, if it was no DQ.. that meant that if Chris wanted to, he could come down to ringside and help out. Of course, Chris easily agreed to that, planning to walk out to the curtains but to bide his time until the moment was right for him to head down to ringside. Randy also suggested that he and Dave could go at some point, since the inter-brand war was still in effect. And while they wouldn't attack Cena or Lita of course, they could go after Edge which meant they would also have to go after Chris to make it look more believable. The remainder of the time in the locker room was spent planning out a strategy. Everyone in the locker room pointedly reminding Lita that she shouldn't interfere even if it was a no DQ match. And when the diva agreed a little too easily a pleading look from her brother quickly changed her mind. But then, time was ticking close.. Chris, John and Lita exiting the safety of the locker room to head elsewhere, the two men keeping the diva between them as they made their way to the curtains. Lita looking a little bit uncertain for the first time since she had changed, knowing that when she did step through those curtains tonight.. It wasn't as Edge's whore, but as John Cena's manager. And as odd as the thought sounded, her being Cena's manager, it brought the faintest of smiles to her face.

Main Event

Since Edge and Mark Henry were already in the ring, all that was left for the main event was the WWE Champion.. Lilian Garcia introducing the champ, being accompanied by Lita.. And as Lita made her way down to ringside, she couldn't help but smirk a little as the crowd seemed a little shell shocked at her appearance. Her smirk growing when she saw Edge's face contort in disgust. And if she had been able to hear the announcers, she would know that she had the King's approval on her wardrobe change while Joey Styles was at a momentary loss for words. Not that she was out there to win anyone over tonight anyway, this was about payback. But it was still nice, not hearing as many boos or slut chants from the crowd.. The redhead easily taking the title belt from Cena when his music tapered off, surprising her a little when he held the ring ropes open for her so she could exit. And once she was standing outside of the ring, the referee called for the bell.. Edge starting off the match, a bandage on his forehead as a result from the wounds that John had inflicted last night. And as the two men locked up in the center of the ring, Lita knew that Edge would be looking for retribution for last night.. And that she was probably the primary target. Even though he had fought Cena last night and was fighting him now, it was just the type of person that Edge was. And now that he was no longer in control and given the way that Henry was watching her and not the match.. Well, Lita just about knew that she was their target, the diva inwardly kicking herself for ever thinking that she could trust that bastard. But, she also knew that her brother was out for retribution, that Randy wanted a measure of revenge…the redhead turning her attention back to the match just as John was re-introducing Edge's head to the top turnbuckle. Lita chanted along with the crowd as the process was repeated on the next set of turnbuckles, Edge suddenly kicking back, dropping to one knee to deliver a low blow.. And then Lita realized why Henry never stayed in the ring, even though it was a no DQ match.. The man climbing down the ring steps and heading towards her. The redhead's eyes went wide with fright, Lita wondering just where Chris was when the man in question appeared at the top of the ramp, reaching her before Henry could grab her.

And while they started fighting on the outside of the ring, Edge was tossing John over the top rope, the West Newbury native landing near the ramp. Without second thought, the redhead went over to him, helping him to his feet despite his protests.. Cena just managing to shove her out of the way when Edge came flying at them, both men hitting the mat as Stephanie appeared at the top of the ramp with a microphone in hand… the brunette promptly informing the audience that this match was now a tag team match.. Edge and Mark Henry vs. John Cena and Chris Masters. And at that declaration, Lita soon found herself standing at the corner designated to Chris and John, the redhead more than thankful for Stephanie's intervention. But it was still a no DQ match which meant that anything could still happen…the diva grateful for the fact that there was a wrestling ring between herself and Edge.. The blond man staring straight at her as Henry and Masters picked up where they had left off on the outside of the ring. And if there was anything she was certain of, it was of the meaning behind that look. Edge wanted revenge, he wanted retribution and he wanted her to pay for it, Lita flipping her hair over her shoulder, flipping the blond man the bird in the process as Chris continued to work on Henry.. The young wrestler starting to become a bit frustrated with the situation when Henry kept mocking him.. Lita deciding to involve herself in the match when Henry used the ring ropes to propel himself forwards…a steel chair crashing into his back.. Both Henry and Cena turning to glare at the redhead for her actions.. Henry starting to get out of the ring when John got in the way, punching the man repeatedly before he stumbled back and into a short clothesline from Chris.. The young wrestler getting in a blatant low blow. Lita was starting to wonder just what was holding up her brother and Randy when the Titantron cut to a shot of the parking lot, Team RAW…down two men, taking on what was there of Team Smackdown…and that was only Randy and Dave. But the two men were currently taking on Big Show, Kane and Carlito.. The brawl spilling into the arena, Lita clutching the ring apron to keep herself from heading back there.

Unfortunately, that also left her open for an attack when Edge grabbed her, wrenching her arm behind her back.. And before she could blink, Lita found herself between Edge and John. The blond man taunting the WWE Champion while the referee tried to gain control of the situations on the outside and inside the ring.. And Lita could see the hesitation in John's eyes, perhaps Edge saw it as well, the diva cursing herself for getting distracted…letting the blond man get the upper hand in things. Edge continued to taunt Cena as he inched back, Lita stomping down as hard as she could on the Canadian's foot before back kicking him where it counted…shoving the redhead forwards as he reached down to clutch at his injury. Lita half stumbled, half fell into John's arms, the man shaking his head at her actions before putting her behind him. Lita heading back to the corner, tossing Chris a steel chair as an afterthought.. A panicked look coming to her face as Henry got to the weapon first, bringing it down over the young wrestler's head. Chris dropping to his knees as Henry tossed the chair aside, thinking that Masters was out of the match. Unfortunately, that same steel chair was soon grabbed by Edge, the blond man hitting Cena first in the ribs and then across the back. But, unlike Henry, Edge kept the weapon in his hands, the two men soon advancing on a now defenseless Lita.. And that was when the brawl from the back spilled out into the ringside area, Carlito, Kane and the Big Show appearing first, followed by Randy and Dave…the two men holding weapons of their own to even the odds. Henry stopped his pursuit to help out Team RAW leaving Edge to take care of the redhead. Before she could blink, Edge dropped the chair, reaching out to grab her arm…yanking her to him before he shoved her at the steel steps. Lita's pained gaze meeting Cena's concerned one, the WWE Champion pulling his own battered body up, grabbing the steel chair for himself as he went after Edge.. The steel chair connecting harshly with the blond man's forehead, opening up the cut from last night…his nose starting to bleed as well before Cena tossed him into the ring and right into a Masterlock.

John was back at the redhead's side, letting out a string of curse words before his expression changed. "I'm sorry.. I should've--"

Lita tried to smile, the redhead's cheek starting to bleed a little. "Don't…you had a match to worry about."

Cena frowned, putting an arm around her, helping her sit up. "Yeah, but I told ya I wouldn't let anything happen to ya and--"

"John, stop…" carefully, she reached out to him, her fingertips brushing over his cheek. "You did what you could.."

The blue eyed wrestler merely nodded to that, "well Masters did pick up the victory, I might've broken that bastards nose tonight.." He frowned when she winced suddenly in pain, "Lita? What hurts?"

Lita tried to laugh, "asshole shoved me into the stairs.. I put out my hands to stop it and--"

"Then you're going to the hospital to get your wrists checked out." John sent her a stern look when she opened her mouth to argue, "don't even start Li, you're hurt.." He gathered her carefully in his arms, "you is going to the hospital and you're gonna get that checked out."

The redhead frowned a touch, her good hand reaching up again, her fingertips grazing over his forehead this time. "I'm not the only one who's hurt."

"So we're both goin' then," Cena amended his previous statement, the diva resting her head against his shoulder, "hey.. Stay awake, alright? If you hit your head--"

Lita managed a slight nod, "where's Chris?"

"Right here, Li.. Just wanted to grab the title belt.." The young wrestler reached out, gently squeezing her shoulder. "Edge passed out. Though, I'm not sure if it was from repeated chair shots or from the Masterlock.."

The diva smiled weakly, Cena forgoing his usual play to the crowd. "At least he won't be coming after us this time.."

Chris smirked, "if I have any say in it, there won't be a next time."

"Damn straight about that," Hunter chimed in as they entered the backstage area, a look of concern on his face. "What happened to her?"

Lita lifted her head from John's shoulder, "Edge tossed me into the steps.. I put my hands out and--"

"She's going to the hospital to get it checked out, make sure she didn't break anything." John finished for her, "plus she's got a cut on her cheek, gotta make sure she didn't hit her head, ya know?"

The Game nodded easily, "Orton is already on his way there with Dave, Show decided to choke slam him on to the stage.. " He held up a hand when Lita sent him a fearful look, "don't worry Li, it's for safety precaution…under McMahon's orders."

John glanced down to her, "there's some steps coming up, alright? I'll take it slow, make sure you ain't getting all jostled up."

Maria and Victoria approached the four as soon as they were down the stairs, the older woman speaking first. "I already got Lita's stuff if you need it."

Chris nodded in confirmation, "I need to grab my gear anyway.." He tossed a look over to Cena, "I'll grab your stuff as well, just wait for me in the parking lot."

John smirked a bit, re-adjusting the diva in his arms as he spoke. "Ain't like I got a choice bro.. The keys to my rental are in my gym bag."

Hunter glanced down to the redhead, "you're crazy, you know that right?"

"It's a family trait," Lita joked softly, hazel eyes starting to close again.

"Hey…stay with me, alright?" John let out a sigh of relief when her eyes opened, "it ain't gonna be much longer 'til we get to the hospital, but ya gotta stay awake, okay?"

The redhead nodded slightly, "I'm trying.. "

"Li…hey," Victoria came into the redhead's clouded line of vision, "it's Vicki.. Just remember all the plans you have for the rest of the wardrobe? Talk to me about it."

While Victoria distracted Lita, John kept a worried glance on her, unable to shake some of the guilt from not being able to reach her in time, the four making their way to the parking lot at a leisurely pace.. Chris eventually finding them, the young wrestler dressed simply in track pants and a sweatshirt. And it was in the parking lot that Cena let go of Lita, Hunter taking her for a moment so the blue eyed wrestler could pull a shirt on.. The redhead looking like she wanted to go back to John. At that, Hunter questioned about the location of the car keys and the rental car.. Maria and Victoria splitting from the group so they could head to their own rental car. And with Lita settled in the backseat of the car, her head resting comfortably on John's shoulder, Hunter drove…the blond man having the sense to get directions to the nearest hospital from one of the parking lot attendants. The subsequent ride to the hospital was mostly in silence, Chris and John doing their best to keep Lita awake.. And while there was no clear indication that she could have a concussion…it was a risk they didn't want to take.. Hunter pulling the rental car into the parking garage of the hospital, noting with some amusement that they were parked next to Randy. Lita once again found herself in John's arms, Chris carrying her purse a bit uncomfortably as they entered the hospital.. Met with the sight of a confused Legend Killer and a concerned Dave.