Author's Note: I'm wearing my Power Ranger hat. It has a picture of the Red Ranger on it. IT'S MORPHIN TIME...er, not actually.

------

Experimentally, Wilson poked the glob of Jell-O that earlier had demanded his attention. It was so entertaining...unlike everything else in the room. Cameron, Chase, and Foreman were engaged in a conversation about Cheetos and cheese in general. House, apparently in some sort of shock from doing nothing all day, had pulled out his cellphone and was attempting to call his home number in hope that Steve McQueen would pick up, because, as House told everyone, he was very worried about his rat. Foreman had responded under his breath, "and we're worried about your sanity," but House shushed him and let the phone ring.

Wilson watched the glob of Jell-O jiggle sadly. He was bored. Very bored. He was just lucky his level of boredom did not extend to building castles with mashed potatoes. Small things in life to be thankful of.

"Um." He stated loudly, and as if it was very important. As far as things were going now, it was.

They looked up from the oh-so-crucial things they were doing to stare and blink.

"What?" He asked, also staring and blinking. Just in case it was a contest and he hadn't been informed.

"Were you going to say something?" Cameron asked him, seeming genuinely interested, which disturbed Wilson, to say the least, because he hung around House and was not used to genuine interest.

"No. I wasn't." He explained and then watched the Jell-O. He was sure it had moved by itself. Absolutely sure. Or maybe it was a trick of the light..or maybe... WAS HE GOING INSANE? Actually, they had a term for it around here, it was called 'going House'.

"Oh. Then why'd you say that?" Cameron continued.

Sighing, wondering why she kept on talking, Wilson told her, "It's a trigger. The rooms are bugged. Any minute now, the FBI will come rushing into the room."

Cameron frowned, obviously either having difficulty believing this or upset at being made fun of. Chase and Foreman snickered.

House hung up his phone and scrunched up his face. "Weirdest thing." He stated, beginning to stand up, "Steve won't answer." Using the wall and his cane he managed to get up and gain his balance. He gave them a withering stare when they all didn't stand up.

"Well. Gonna just sit around all day? We've got work to do."

So, they all scrambled up, Chase and Foreman brushing Cheetos off their clothing as Cameron collapsed into giggles and Wilson said a mental good bye to the Jell-O.

"Bring walkie talkies." House told them.

"Er, this just a...suggestion...but I suggest we don't split up this time." Wilson said. "It may have worked well for Scooby, Shaggy, and the gang but really, they didn't have a clue what they were going either."

It might as well been Chase who had said it, because everyone completely ignored him and followed House. Wilson resigned himself and followed, too.

And they realized how late it was. Past dinnertime. The hospital sounded empty but patients in their rooms gazed curiously out their windows at the group of 'doctors' wearing baseball caps and carrying walkie talkies.

"Shouldn't we be worrying about Cuddy finding us or something?" Foreman presented this question very dubiously.

"If she does we'll sacrifice one of you..." House turned to look back at the ducklings. "Chase. He can take one for the team."

Indignant, Chase asked, "Why me?" and House answered, scoffing, "Duh, you're the PINK RANGER."

Chase resisted the urge to step on the back of House's shoe so he stumbled. He knew that would aggravate House and prompt the man to something worse like post the pictures of Chase in a skirt all over the hospital. On reflection, House would do that without any prompting, so really, why shouldn't he?

Oh, right. Cripple.

"Where're we going?" Wilson, walking next to House, asked.

"What? I thought you were leading, Wilson!" House gasped and Wilson rolled his eyes. Really, though. Where were they going?

And why were they going there?

More importantly: would they come out alive?

Wilson hoped so. For one thing, he had been planning to bake oatmeal cookies tomorrow. House didn't like oatmeal cookies. Wilson did. It was fun; teasing House with cookies. Of course, then House would steal Wilson's lunch. Boo.

Chase wondered if any of things was going to be included in his paycheck. Foreman thought the same thing and Cameron was left with her squirt guns filled with a suspicious blue liquid. What was it? Oh, well. Who cared? Besides the people who got shot with it. And didn't they deserve it? Grinning, she lifted the toy gun and aimed it at House's back and pretended to pull the trigger. Chase spotted her and smiled, encouraging her and mouthing, 'go ahead, do it'. She shook her head, still grinning. House, without even turning around, said, "Stop conspiring against me. Wilson does that enough."

Chase and Cameron blinked at each other. House was doing that Twilight Zone mind thing again. They had really got to watch out for that.

And apparently they had arrived wherever they were going because House ducked into a room. Wilson, shrugging, also entered through the nondescript door. The rest followed.

It was yet another storage room.

"Why are we--" Chase began, but House shushed him.

"Boxes!" House whispered and they looked around.

"Yes, House. Boxes. Just like in the last room. Why the boxes?" Foreman didn't bother to lower his voice.

"They're the same boxes." House told them.

"Uh, how do you know?" Foreman, ever the doubtful.

"I just do."

Either he was losing it or those were the boxes from the last room. Foreman wouldn't put either of those past House.

As quickly as he had come in the room, House left it and everyone quickly followed, eager to either a) figure out the hell was going on or b) not get left behind or c) all of the above.

It was amazing, at times, how fast House could hobble along when he was excited. And, even more amazing, how difficult it was for everyone else to keep up with him. Then again, House would've protested, he was much cooler than them and COOL got more M.P.H. then UNCOOL did.

---------

And Queen Bansheera knew that ANGRY got way more mileage then COOL did, no matter how cool COOL was.

Finally, she was tired of trusting her minions to track House down. They had failed her, and would be punished accordingly. Now, it was all up to her and pure anger, which gets VERY good M.P.H. She knew this because she's worked with House and the man is very good at hide and go seek. Cuddy was, too. She was best at the seeking part.

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Bzzt. "Pink Ranger! If I've told you once--" Bzzt.

Bzzt. "This is the first time you've told me, House." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "--I've told you...a few times. Anyway. Stop flirting with the Yellow Ranger. See? I've told you that a few times." Bzzt...

Bzzt. "House. I reiterate you do NOT have to use the walkie talkie, we're walking right behind you." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "Blue Ranger, you're a fun killer." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "No, it's just more practical to--" Bzzt.

Bzzt. "I don't care. We're using the walkie talkies. Black Ranger?" Bzzt..."Black Ranger?"..."BLACK RANGER!"...Bzzt.

Bzzt."WHAT, Red Ranger?" Bzzt.

Bzzt..."...you're about to walk into a wall."..bzzt.

THUMP.

…

Bzzt. "Black Ranger. You just walked into a wall." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "I KNOW THAT, HOUSE!" Bzzzt.

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"Uhm, Doctor Cuddy..." her secretary began, hesitantly, and very courageously, "I think...you should calm down."

It was brave, yet much unappreciated. Because Cuddy completely ignored him as if he were Chase and left the office, anyway, leaving her male secretary about to quit and/or start sobbing uncontrollably.

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Bzzt. "Red Ranger?" Bzzt.

Bzzt. "Sigh. Yes, Yellow Ranger?" Bzzt.

Bzzt. "The Black Ranger just ran into a wall." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "Thank you, Yellow Ranger." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "...was that sarcastic?" Bzzt.

Bzzt. "NO, Yellow Ranger, of course it wasn't." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "...that was sarcastic." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "What a genius." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "Cameron, ignore him." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "The Pink Ranger has good advice, Yellow Ranger…Where are we going?" Bzzt.

Bzzt. "Oh, Blue Ranger, trust your Red Ranger. I know where I'm going..." Bzzt.

...bzzt. "Right." Bzzt.

...bzzt. "Uh...where are we?" Bzzt.

Bzzt. "Right where you belong. The psych ward..." Bzzt...

Bzzt. "What was that, Black Ranger?" Bzzt.

...bzzt. "What was what?" Bzzt.

Bzzt. "What you just said." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "I didn't say anything, Red Ranger." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "I don't believe you, Black Ranger." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "Why not?" Bzzt.

Bzzt. "Because...you're the Black Ranger." Bzzt.

Bzzt…"Oh, look." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "What, Blue Ranger?" Bzzt.

Bzzt. "Up ahead...there's an elephant." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "An elephant in a hospital? That's absurd." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "No, your hair's absurd, Pink Ranger!" Bzzt.

Bzzt. "Huh?" Bzzt.

Bzzt. "What?" Bzzt...

Bzzzt. "Elephant, Chase!" Bzzt.

Bzzt. "There's not a...oh, there is." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "Told you so." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "ARGH! NOT THAT ELEPHANT!" Bzzt...

Bzzt. "Why's the Black Ranger freaking out?" Bzzt.

Bzzt. "I don't know." Bzzt.

Bzzt. "Oh." Bzzt.

---------

Queen Bansheera had checked House's usual hideouts and was now searching for him in the lesser known ones, like the ObGyn lounge and the Maternity waiting room and she even checked the clinic. Not there.

-------

House slipped his walkie talkie into his pocket, stepped forward, and grabbed the fluffy pink elephant that stood in the center of the hallway. Very forebodingly, might he add. He stared the elephant in its shiny plastic blue eyes and frowned.
"Foreman...it's just an elephant." He waved the large elephant in Foreman's face and Foreman recoiled, mumbling utter nonsense.

Chase hid his smirk behind his hand.

"Why are you afraid of the elephant? Or, as I have now dubbed her, Linda." House pushed Linda into Cameron's arm. For her part, Cameron looked mildly shocked before attempting to hold the large toy.

"Because it asked me to marry it." Foreman stuttered.

"Well, Eric, I'd like to see how far you plan to get in a relationship if you fear commitment that much. And it's a SHE, not an IT."

"It knew my name!"

"I know your name. Then again, I'm not asking you to marry me, because I don't approve of inter-office relationships. You know that. We've discussed this."

"It...she...I..." Foreman shook his head and gave up. "Just…keep that thing away from me."

"Linda resents being called 'it' and a 'thing', and demands you apologize." Cameron said, having fun with this.

Foreman glared at her. Her grin faltered slightly. Chase turned around, failing to disguise his not-very-well-hidden fit of laughter.

"I can't help wondering why you needed the elephant in the first place." Wilson murmured, running a hand through his hair.

"As I mentioned before, it is entirely crucial. Doesn't anyone listen to me?" House asked rhetorically, but in return got a loud chorus of "NO"s from his minions, his best friend, and the sparkly elephant.

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AN: And here I was hoping I could end this story here. I am getting a bit tired of writing this...does that make it any less better? Inform me in your REVIEW. Also. Uh. What? Oh, I'm getting SPIDER-MAN SHOELACES and school for me starts on the 29th. B.S., I know, but I get to be in HONORS ENGLISH. Like. Go smart people. Unfortunetly, as you can all see, I am a horrible writer. (sarcasm)

So I've got to end this story by the 29th. Of, yes. August. And today's the...uh, I dunno, actually, my ever-knowing watch broke. I keep wearing the watch, though. Uh.

I kinda like this chapter. Conversations over the walkie talkies (the 'bzzt's are the sound the walkie talkies make when you push that talk button, if you couldn't tell. if you could I applaud you. if you couldn't, stop reading this and go play with walkie talkies.) were fun to write.

REVIEW. Oh, whatever. I love this website.

And Spider-Man. I love Spider-Man.

Me and Erin (aka insertwickedpennamehere. by the way, erin, love that penname. D) are starting a club. A SECRET CLUB. Oh, whoops, not so secret now, is it? The No Life Club. Because we have no lives. If you have no life (and this is figuratively, if you REALLY have no life and are dead, get yourself to a morgue ASAP) then...uh...well, I hadn't thought of that part yet. Aha...