DISCLAIMER

Last I checked, I'm not a humongous-ly rich blonde Brit. I'm a broke-ass brunette, student-waitress paying for a room in Canada with an unhealthy obsession with Harry Potter. Thus, I do not own the franchise or the characters, sadly.

I also don't own Marvel. I wish I do though.

You're going to see me on breaks, btw -.-zzz

02 August 2012

"Pepper's going to kill me." A raven-haired man with a weird goatee sighed to himself as he slowly sat down against the wall of a dingy pub. He watched many people donned in garish old-fashioned clothes pass by him as he mulled over everything that had happened the past three days.

-.- zzz

Three days ago.

Genius, billionaire, playboy, and philanthropist he may be, but Tony Stark wouldn't call himself patient. Another pompous ass looking to snag the rich man's attention had been groveling to him and driving him nuts for the past fifteen minutes. With Pepper reigning him in, he had no choice but to 'sit and be a good little Tony.' He looked at his assistant with a pout and whimpered piteously, cutting off the swine's spiel. He got a lifted eyebrow from the blonde, and a subtle eye twitch from the Megalosaurus.

"I've been a good boy, Peppy. May we please go get ice cream now?" he asked in a whiny childlike voice, mock wringing his hands and putting on watery puppy dog eyes for effect.

Pepper faced him fully with a glare saying, "Mr. Stark, I believe we had an understanding." Turning to the oversized flushing hippo with an encouraging smile, she said, "Please continue, Mr. Dursley." Tony slumped down his chair, crossed his arms, and pouted like a petulant child, dismissive of the apprehensive look of the huge glob across him. Dufus, or whatever his name was, cleared his throat and droned on frenziedly as if nothing had happened.

Ten more minutes passed, and the man was still blubbering. Not wanting to hear any more rubbish and honestly getting dizzy from eyeing a bug circling above the mammoth's head like a sickening parody of a halo, Tony stood up abruptly, ignoring the man's splutter. "Well, it was sure nice meeting you, Jabba. But I'm a busy man, and I have loads of interesting things to do." With that, he purposely walked out the door of the pudgy blob's office, his mind on a mission: to find the most delicious ice cream along the River Thames, hopefully, something with hazelnut.

Tony pretended not to hear Pepper's calls and the wobbly walrus' begging. Slotting his keys in and starting the car, he slipped his glasses on and waited for Pepper as she apologized to Donkey. Happy returned towards her to escort her to the car. Finally, three minutes later, Tony drove away from Grunnings, Happy on the front seat while a Mount Pepper stewed in the back seat.

"Anthony Edward Stark!" Pepper's shrill voice made him swerve the car a bit.

Despite being used to it, Tony still cowered whenever she did. Before Pepper could launch into a tirade, he held his hand up. "Pep, you know as well as I do that Dummy was just full of crap." He said, not looking away from the road. She sighed and reluctantly nodded, "but you couldn't just leave abruptly in the middle of-"

"We were in the beginning." He said with a smirk, making Happy look at him incredulously.

Pepper huffed at him with a glare at the back of his head. "It doesn't matter," she continued, "you couldn't just leave in the middle of ANY meeting."

Tony just shrugged. Beside him, Happy was trying to hide his snigger by pretending to wipe something off his mouth.

-.- zzz

A contented Tony was enjoying his ice cream as he sat on his Mustang's hood, a car that Pepper highly disapproved of using for today's meeting, swinging his legs with a happy hum. Pepper was inside, talking to someone on her phone. By the looks of it, she has an amicable discussion with the receiver, evidenced by her smile and nods. A few minutes later, she went out of the convertible and stood before him. "Tony, I spoke with Mr. Dursley. We will be resuming our meeting at their residence tomorrow evening. Grunnings is the foremost drill supplier here in Britain, and it would be in your best interest to take this deal seriously", she said with her eyes fixed piercingly at him as if to will his compliance merely by her death gaze.

Tony pouted and slumped his shoulders. "Do we have to?", he whined.

An eyeroll was what he got from her, then she settled on her 'irritated teacher' glare. "Tony, why do we need to talk with Grunnings?" she asked. If she wasn't irate he would've thought that her angry head tilt was cute. He hummed as if to think hard about the answer, ending with an exaggerated shrug. Her glare transformed into 'mother of seven'. She answered her own question, saying, "It would be one of our biggest competitors for YOUR British Invasion. You insisted on coming here, Tony."

He looked at her with a smirk, "And I could leave you to it now if you want."

Her nose wrinkled with distaste, possibly remembering how the hog looked at her perversely. "Do we really need another drill company, Tony? We can make our own, too, and fare better than Grunnings."

Tony placed his ice cream cup down and pulled Pepper towards him. "Pepperoni, I'm not gonna leave you, okay? Let's just get it over with."

Her smile of a cat that got the cream told him that he just gotten one-upped. "If you say so." She singsonged.

He rolled his eyes as he let go of Pepper's hand, "Fine, fine." Jumping from the hood and grabbing his ice cream. "Why do we even need Grunnings?" he complained, throwing back her own question.

"Because it is owned by one of the most influential, not to mention the wealthiest, men here in Britain? And the company's Board is more lenient and accommodating to the colonies than others." Pepper said as she entered the backseat. Tony plopped beside her as Happy started backing up the car.

"Who even uses colonies nowadays?" Happy muttered.

"Why won't we meet him up then? CEO-to-CEO, Ms. CEO." Tony asked.

She looked at him with a frown. "Tony, did you not read what I sent you?"

With that, he pulled out a tablet saying, "Reading it."

Reading quietly with a few bewildered mutterings, quiet considering Tony as he usually accompanies it with sarcastic commentaries, he looked at Pepper blankly. "How can a dead man be influential, Pepper?" he asked.

Pepper took a deep breath, preparing for a long explanation. "Ignatius Pipperellus owned the largest share of assets here in Britain, aside from the Queen. Despite being dead for a long time, he has heirs. His heirs, unfortunately, are too secluded and private –"

"Unlike you Tony." Happy quipped.

"I'm a VERY private person." Tony gasped, his face that of indignation.

Pepper, used to their antics, spoke on despite the interruption, "who still manage the companies in the background and are represented by the Board of Directors. Despite being dead, everything is still under Mr. Pipperellus through a very specific and highly classified contract made during the reign of King Henry III. No one knows the clauses of the contract. But what was gathered is that all the assets made and gathered by his descendants would all be named after him retroactively to preserve the family legacy and refrain others from stealing what is rightfully theirs. Also, to prevent recalcitrant heirs from draining it. How? I don't really know. It cannot be repealed as it is close-ended and binding to the important factions. It is believed that only the monarchs know of the contract's contents but not its specifics. They and any governing body don't have the power to repeal it in any form as per the contract."

"That's a load of dung." Happy couldn't help but comment, as he swiftly pulled the car over to park to prevent any accidents from his interest and shocks.

"Seconded." Agreed Tony, nonplussed by Happy's action.

Despite her own disbelief, Pepper carried on, "Well, unfortunately for you two, it is fact. And unfortunately for us, the last time an heir was heard of was twelve years ago. That's why we're only meeting up with a representative assigned by the Board of Governors of a minor company. Despite Grunnings being big, it is still minor considering the other companies owned by Pipperellus. People who know about the Pipperellus believe that they died out then, but records say otherwise. Thus, the Pipperellus Fortune is still unclaimed, while interests and assets are deposited. The taxes from the fortune is said to have been the primary aid to the economy during the 2000 British Civil Crisis. Some call the Pipperellus fortune The Old Money that Never Goes Stale."

The two men sat in shocked silence for a while, looking at each other to gauge the other's comprehension. Surprisingly, it was Happy who broke the silence, "Twelve years? Twelve years?!" He faced Tony again, their face in similar expressions of bewilderment that Pepper was glad to have it recorded by Jarvis through the car cameras.

"Imagine that accumulated wealth," Tony whispered disbelievingly. "And no one's claiming it." He slowly looked at Pepper, a smirk slowly forming on his lips. She suddenly felt cold dread chill her spine.

Tony, just as slowly as he smirked, grinned. "My dear sweet Pepperella, what are the chances of me being a Pipperellus heir?" He said in a pompous honey-laced posh-accented tone.

"TONY NO!" both other car occupants yelled.

-.- zzz

AUTHOR'S NOTE

Unbeta-ed, thus errors are errors. This would be my first published fanfic. Excited. Low-key terrified. This is just a random writing I made after a class, so I don't really know where it is going. However, this is based on an outline from another unwritten fanfic of mine. I guess you know where the next chapter is going. I will not be having regular updates as I also have a life and writing fanfiction is not a paid job. Do check out some of my library readings for other AWESOME stories. I will update my bio accordingly for any reasons that would impede or progress my writing magic.

Til we meet again in the next chapter.

TragicErato