AN: I know, I know, I suck soooo bad. I took ages to write this because no matter what I did, I didn't like it. I still don't, really, but I don't want to make you wait any more so here it is. I apologise in advance for the badness, and I apologise in hindsight for the lateness.

I really don't deserve all you magnificent reviewers, but... please reveiew anyway? Constructive criticism is BEGGED FOR!

Little White Lies

Same Old Stuff

Nathan

We've both been awake for about three hours and neither of us want to get out of bed. It's like we've found somewhere to escape this huge lie we've got ourselves caught in, and we don't want to walk out of it. We want to stay like this forever. Lying side by side with no worries in the world, Haley's head nestled into the crook of my arm.

Lucas came in the house about an hour ago but thankfully he isn't in the habit of storming into my bedroom, and so we're waiting for him to go out again before Haley sneaks out. Mom left early this morning, probably for Karen's Café. I know I really hated the way she reacted last night - and don't get me wrong, it still hurts - but a part of me is just relieved that someone knows. The secrets lost some of it's power somehow, it's less suffocating.

"Can't we just pause the world," Haley asks, mirroring my thoughts exactly. I smile and kiss her temple.

"I wish we could," I say. "I'd never leave. I'm never more content than when I'm with you Hales. You're my world, you're the most important thing to me."

Haley smiles up at me and nestles in closer. "And you're the most important thing to me. I mean, I love our friends and I would never want to live without them, but it's you that I think of before I go to sleep, you that enters my thoughts as soon as I wake up. You're… you're everything Nathan. I love you so much."

I'm about to reply, something gushy and romantic because that's the kind of mood we seem to be in, but I hear someone outside the door and all words die on the way from my brain to my mouth. The door handle starts to turn and Haley puts her hand in mine, clutching it tight.

"Lucas, what the hell are you doing?" I yell out, but when the door swings open it's not Lucas, it's Brooke.

"Brooke?" Haley cries out, sitting up and pulling the sheets tight around herself. "What… what are you…" Only she doesn't seem able to finish any sentences.

"Oh my God," Brooke whispers. "I… I can't believe it. I thought that…" she stops and gives a dry laugh, the kind that tells me she isn't too amused. "I thought I was letting my imagination run away with me, but I'm not, am I? You two are married!"

Haley opens her mouth, obviously trying to come up with some kind of an excuse, but her whole body freezes when she realises what Brooke said last. How the hell does she know that? Haley's hand goes limp in mine.

"How did you know?" I ask, because Haley looks too dumbstruck to ask herself.

Brooke leans against the doorframe, almost like she can't support herself properly. "Well, it doesn't take a rocket scientist. I just put everything together. Luckily everyone else is as dumb as you banked on."

"Brooke, it's not like that," I say, because it's not. Its not as if we came into this wanting to lie to our friends. We're the ones suffering most from it.

"Well, what is it like?" Brooke asks.

Suddenly Haley seems to reanimate. She grips my hand again and I grip it back. "We were scared Brooke. We put off telling you because we were petrified about how everyone would react, and when you rang… I was going to tell you, I really was. I tried telling you, but then you said how Dan would cut Nathan off if he got married, and you were right. He would, and more than that, he'd do his very best to break us up, to ruin our lives at college. I mean, you know what Dan's like…"

"So you lied to us?" Brooke asks, her wide olive eyes filled with hurt.

Haley doesn't say anything, but instead lets out a racking sob and a nod.

"We're sorry," I say, pulling Haley to my chest where she cries. It's heart breaking. "We rang the next day to tell you, but then you said how you told everyone and we didn't see any way out of it, so we played along. It all got a bit out of hand…"

"A bit?" Brooke asks, still leaning against the door. "My God, I… I can't believe it. You two are married?"

"I am so sorry Brooke," Haley says, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. "I can't even begin to tell you how sorry I am. I just… I got scared, and I didn't know what to do, so I lied more and dug us into this huge hole that I didn't have a clue how to get out of. It broke my heart to lie to you though. To lie to all of you, but we can't tell anyone. We can't!"

Brooke looks at us both and she takes a deep breath and sniffs heavily, like she's trying not to cry.

"If my dad finds out," I say, trying to reason with her. Haley's hand is still gripping mine furiously.

"Why? Why did you get married in the first place? You're 18."

"We love each other, and we didn't want to wait."

Brooke opens her mouth to say something else, but someone else gets there first.

"Brooke? Hey, I didn't hear you come in. What are you doing at Nathan's door?"

All three of us turn towards the voice in horror. Lucas. His voice is nearby and it's getting closer. Brooke stares towards him, her face frozen and it would be funny if it wasn't so serious.

Almost in slow motion Lucas appears at the door with a grin on his face, that twists to confusion all too quickly at the look on Brooke's face. He hasn't seen us yet and I see Haley eyeing the closet door as if trying to weigh up how likely it would be for her to jump in there before Lucas sees her. It wouldn't be very likely and we both know it.

Lucas looks in, and the confused frown freezes on his face. "What the…?"

Brooke jumps up and points at us. "Can you believe it Lucas?" she says in a really high strangled voice. She's going to tell on us.

"What's going on?" Lucas asks, looking from Haley to me and then back again.

"Isn't it obvious?" Brooke asks.

"Lucas, we're…" Haley starts, but Brooke throws her a warning glance.

"Oh don't you dare speak missy!" She says, her voice so harsh that it makes even me flinch. She turns back to Lucas. "They had ex-sex!"

The silence in the room is deafening, but it's like the tension that was in the air subsides as Haley and I realise Brooke isn't going to tell.

"What?" Lucas asks.

"It's textbook," Brooke goes on. "Girl has bad date, feels insecure about her self and goes to her ex as if trying to validate her sexuality. Boy feels horny, desperate girl comes to door and boy thinks all his birthdays have come at once. Ex-sex."

Oh Boy.

"You totally took advantage of her Nate!" Lucas shouts. I try not to flinch at how close we are, and my mind races for something to say. I'm also trying really hard not to look at Haley who is sat on the couch in last night's red dress. God, she looks so hot in it, especially with her hair all messed up post-sex style.

"It wasn't his…" Haley starts, but is cut off by Brooke who is pacing the room with her arms crossed.

"Shh!" she says loudly. "We haven't got to you yet. Just… just stay quiet, okay?" Her voice is shaky and Haley looks at her as if she's about to cry.

Right, time to think on the spot Nathan. Do I act all high and mighty - 'it's not my fault I'm so irresistible' kind of line - or do I act all sensitive and sweet - 'I'm still in love with her. I thought we were going to get back together.' Hmm, it's a tough one, especially when two other people in the room are going to see right through this. A part of me wonders why Brooke didn't just tell Lucas. Why she didn't let him in on our secret. Of course, I know I can't tell him. Lucas isn't a bad guy, but he's driven by his emotions, and if he doesn't like that me and Haley are engaged, he's going to find it hard to hide that. He could ruin everything if he knows.

"Yeah, I did," I say finally, looking at the floor. I can't look anywhere else. Seeing the sadness in Haley's eyes is heartbreaking, Looking at Brooke makes my chest constrict out of guilt, and looking at Lucas will make me want to tell the truth so much, I know I won't be able to keep lying. "I did, and I'm sorry… but I mean, I was drunk last night man."

"Drunk? Is that your answer to everything? You cheated on Haley because you were drunk too. Remember that? Do you remember that Haley?" Lucas turns away from me, and I risk a look up. Haley is staring at me and I can tell that she's trying not to look at Lucas.

"I… I do," Haley says after a pause.

I know what you're thinking. No really, I do. You're thinking 'why the hell don't they just tell him? What is the big deal?' Well, if you really want to know, here it is: Betrayal. Complete and utter betrayal. I mean, you saw the way Brooke reacted when she found out, what would Lucas be like? We may not have always had the best relationship, but after years it's finally working out, and he's my brother for God's sake! And Haley, I mean, I know the two of them used to date - another reason we can't tell him, betrayed twice by the same people - but they're really close. Like, practically best friends. If we told Lucas now, he would feel beyond betrayed, and I don't know if we could bounce back from that. Not unless another psycho Rob tries to burn me alive again. I have a feeling that would somehow make us bond, though I don't really think it would be worth it.

"So, the two of you have nothing t say for yourselves?" Lucas asks, crossing his arms. I know it's the totally wrong time to do it, but I laugh. I can't help it! He sounds like a disappointed teacher or something, and despite the situation being so terse and horrible - or maybe it's beacuse of that - I see the funny side, and I can't stop the laugh from rising up in my throat.

"Nathan!" Brooke scolds, though strangely enough she looks like she's about to laugh too. Another laugh enters, and I turn to see Haley burying her head in her hands, her shoulders shaking.

"What? You think this is funny, Nate? Huh? You think that taking advantage of a confused and desperate girl is funny?"

"Hey! Enough of the desperate please!" Haley bursts in through her giggles. This makes the two of us laugh more, and even Brooke is biting down on her lip. Lucas throws his hands up in exasperation.

"Forget it. I'm through trying to get through to the two of you." He stalks out the room.

"You two... God! You owe me so big," Brooke says, her tone deathly serious as she follows Lucas out. Me and Haley are left alone. She's stopped laughing and I can see that her eyes are watering. I get up and put my arms around her. Haley leans into it.

"Why didn't we just tell him we were getting back together?" She sobs, her shoulders shaking again but this time out of despair instead of merriment. "W-Why do we always make things so complicated for ourselves Nate?"

"Come on Hales," I whisper into her hair as she nuzzles against my chest. "We have to wait. We couldn't tell him then, it would have looked like a rebound kind of deal. I know its not easy, but if it was it wouldn't be worth it, and whatever we are Haley, we're worth it. Me a you, we're worth going through hell and back. I love you..."

Haley sniffs loudly. "I love you."