In a calm and quiet part of Vale, a young woman was leaning out the window of an abandoned construction-site building and gazing into the sky, which only just now started to fill with stars.
"You know, even with all these weird weapons and even weirder anime powers, seeing the moon like this," her arm reached out in the direction of the shattered moon as if that would somehow mend it whole and force everything to make sense again, "it really hits home that this isn't really, well, my home!" chuckling at her own joke, she turned back to look at the only other occupant in the unfinished room.
"F*ck you!" yelled a bleeding man before a violent wave of coughing fit overtook him, "What the f*ck are you even on about!"
After eyeing him for a moment, the woman nodded to herself, "No, you are right," she raised her rifle and slowly aimed it at him, "monologuing is a bit beneath me."
Before the man could voice any protests, a dull *thump* sounded out as the silenced weapon finished the job it had already started.
Now truly alone, the woman took in the rest of the large room and all the other corpses lying all around it with a calculating glint in her eyes.
"These guys better not be broke."
~A Few Hours Before~
For as long as I remember, I have always been a light sleeper, waking up if someone so much as opens a well-oiled door near me.
So it was a particularly startling experience to wake up not to an alarm but to someone shaking me awake.
"Miss, are you okay?" a middle-aged male voice greeted me.
I barely managed to stop myself from crying out and hitting him with anything at arm's length because one, he was wearing a police uniform, and two, he wasn't shooting me full of holes yet.
Instantly much more awake, I quickly sit up and take in my surroundings. Only, instead of the lavishly designed interior I expected, what greeted me were open skies and freshly cut grass.
"Uh-huh, yep, I am fairly certain that this is not my penthouse." I am not unfamiliar with the experience of drinking myself into oblivion, but this is the first time I woke up anywhere other than in my bed, not to mention in a freaking park.
Besides, I am fairly certain that I didn't have anything to drink going to bed.
"Miss?" Oh, yeah, that guy is still here.
"Oh, uh, yeah, I'll be fine, sorry." Wow, taking eloquence to new heights, right there. Maybe that theory about being drunk was not as farfetched as I thought.
I get up to my feet and dust any loose dirt and grass off my clothes, and I am wearing clothes, thankfully.
My outfit consists of dark-grey, waist-high pants held up by suspenders over a red shirt with a frilly v-neck tucked into said pants. On my head used to sit a black sun hat and black-tinted marble sunglasses, but a quick look around shows that they had simply fallen off and were not lost entirely.
"Heh, it must have been one hell of a night for me to end up like this." I joke as I lean down to pick my things up, and I hear a little chuckle for my efforts.
"Are you sure this was not daytime drinking? 'Cause, it's a bit late to be waking up if you got here at night." I stiffened for a split second before placing the hat and sunglasses back on my head.
Now fully awake, I take in the place with fresher eyes and notice many concerning details I missed before.
The slightly warm colours of the sky were not, as I first guessed, because the morning was turning to day, but because the day was already turning to evening.
Then, while the few people I can see appear to be as expected at first glance, on the second, I see that most, if not all, have dyed hair, "and are those fricking bunny ears?"
Looking back at my temporary companion, I see that at least his hair is an ordinary black like mine, but even he isn't free from concerning details.
Such as his uniform being different from the ones worn by the LSPD.
The blue shirt was lighter, pants were held in place not by a belt but by suspenders, "he doesn't even have a firearm on him!" and there wasn't a badge on his chest. Instead, there was a smaller version of it pinned to his collar.
I don't let my gaze linger on that last part, and while hiding my internal panic, I give him a bright smile instead.
"Yeah, last night must have been something."
After nodding to each other, we finally parted ways with polite smiles. Only, when I turned away, a frown appeared on mine.
I whip out my phone and open the map, only to freeze momentarily.
"Welp, that can't be good."
Not recognising where I am was as disappointing as expected, but the more I zoom out, the more the pit in my stomach grows until the app doesn't let me zoom out any further.
"I mean," after staring at the image before me for a good half a minute, I finally beak out of my stupor, "I know I wasn't the best at geography, but I'm pretty sure that's not how the continents look."
Greenland and Australia seem to be mostly the same if a little shaken up, but everything in between them is messed up beyond recognition.
"I swear, if this is some messed up prank by Lester or something, I will..." I closed the map and was about to call the said person until I opened my contacts only to be greeted with nothing.
(No Contacts.) That is what I see when I open it.
There was no Lester, no Assistant and not even the emergency services on my phone.
After closing the contacts, I hesitantly open the browser only to find, well, not nothing, but nothing familiar. The browser's layout stayed the same, but the actual sites I grew familiar with were nowhere to be found. Everything was different, yet weirdly the same.
The "Legendary Motorsports" icon was replaced with a similar background and a different car, but I could still tell it was the Legendary Motorsports.
The same was true for "Warstock" and all the other sites, as if they hadn't changed, but I simply selected a different theme.
Feeling a bit more hopeful, I navigate to the Money category and find that the site I was looking for was no longer called "Maze Bank" but "Vale Bank" instead. Two green, stylised axes crossing each other replaced the red square icon of a maze I was familiar with.
I tap it and open the site.
(Account balance: 0 Lien)
I nearly fainted right then and there.
~0~
One panic attack and one stolen car later, I was slowly driving down the street of what I assume constitutes the rough side of town.
"So to summarise what happened," I idly think while paying more attention to the buildings around the street than the road itself, "I have no idea of where I am, I lost all my contacts, I lost all my money, and I lost all my vehicles."
"sniffle"
My eyes still became a little bit red at the last two points.
I was active in Los Santos for over two years and eventually amassed nearly a hundred million dollars of liquid cash and around the same amount in cars and aircraft.
That's not even considering the properties, businesses and special purchases such as the MOC or the Super Yacht.
And now, everything was gone like a bad dream.
Still, I am not one to stay idle.
Currently, I am driving around town looking around for criminals so I could either get back into the game or at the very least rob them. Because I'm currently not the "Holy sh*t, my account balance dipped into the six digits!" kind of broke, but the "Holy sh*t I can't even afford a snack!" kind of broke.
"There." I broke out of my wallowing because I caught sight of a couple of goons standing guard at a seemingly abandoned construction-site building entrance. It was a remote and quiet place of town where there weren't any pedestrians despite the still relatively early hours of the evening.
I stopped outside of their sight and got out of the car.
Checking over my pistol one last time, "thank sweet baby RNGesus, I still have my weapons!" I walk out in the open and approach the goons.
The security is so lax around here that the idiots don't even notice me until I am halfway across the yard.
My opinion of them doesn't improve because before I could even introduce myself, the fools had already started catcalling me.
"Hehe-hey, look at the little lost lamb walking into our den!" Idiot Nr. 1 yelled while elbowing his buddy to catch his attention.
"Hehe, don't worry, little lady, these big bad wolves don't bite!" Finally awake, Idiot Nr. 2 said and started slowly walking towards me, "Much."
Welp, robbery it is, then!
While they were still laughing at their own joke, I calmly whipped out my silenced pistol and rewarded their humour with a couple of headshots each.
They hit the floor before either had the chance to scream for help, but they didn't need to because when the loud ruckus they were making stopped without any warning, their buddies inside were going to start investigating.
Sensing that the time for subtlety is over, I switch my pistol over to my Special Carbine Mk.2 rifle and run inside the building.
This gang found the multi-storied building and made it their own, bringing in an eclectic selection of furniture, lights, posters, and trash.
What greeted me when I entered inside were eight surprised faces lounging around and staring at the one who so rudely barged into their hideout.
Unfortunately for me, their surprise didn't last forever since, by the time I shot down five of them, the other three got their wits together and started returning fire, forcing me behind a wall for cover.
"INTRUDER!" One of them shouted, and now it appeared that the fun would start for real.
At the first lul of bullets, I get out of cover and drop two more guys.
I proceeded deeper into the room while keeping my aim at the place where I knew the last guy was hiding, and the moment he peeked his head out, I downed him as well.
"Ten." I count while reloading as I ascend the stairs.
Everything until now was going smoothly, but the ones downstairs were taken by surprise, and I feel that the same will not hold with the ones upstairs.
I was proven correct when the first thing that greeted me at the top was a firing line of ten more gang members.
I could barely get behind a wall before they all opened fire on the place I was only just standing.
"Who the f*ck do you think you are, huh!?" I was about to retaliate once they stopped, but a voice roared, making me pause. "You think you can just come in here and f*ck with us?! I'll f*cking skin you!"
Ooh, banter! It's such a rare thing in this business because usually, by the time I kill half of them, the rest are no longer in the mood for this kind of thing.
So really, I am legally obligated to respond in kind, right?
"Okay, first of all, that was very rude!" I yell in a faux offended tone one would use on a naughty little kid.
"Wha-!"
"Second of all," I interrupt whatever response he would give while also taking out a grenade. I poke my head out of cover and give them a wide grin before responding, "seeing as I have already killed half of you guys, I do think I can mess with you!"
Before another hail of bullets starts raining on my position, I note down a few details.
Nine guys are pointing their guns at me 10 meters down range at the end of a large room, and one guy, who I assume is the leader, was holding not a gun but a sword of all things.
"Two seconds should be enough," I pull the pin and release the lever, "five, four," I start counting.
"ARGH! That's. It!" The leader snaps, "three," "Bring me that b*tch's head, NOW!" he yells at his men.
"Two," I throw the grenade at them while they are still talking, "one."
"Grenade!" Someone finally notices what landed near their feet and shouts, but unfortunately, it's too late, "zero!"
*BOOM!*
A deafening explosion rocks the building, and I emerge from cover, rifle first.
They were tightly packed, but not that tight, so more than half of them managed to cling to life. But at the very least, they were all knocked over, which made picking them off a quick and easy task.
But just as I was about to put away my rifle and pat myself on the back, a figure lunged at me from the side with inhuman speed, and it took everything I had just to dodge into a roll to avoid it.
But even then, the assailant still managed to clip my left arm along the way with something sharp, drawing blood.
Ignoring the pain, I instantly zeroed in on them and sprayed their face with bullets.
Instead of the messy shower of gore I expected, however, all I got for my trouble was a grunt and the sound of bullets plinking as if what they impacted was not flesh but bullet-proof ceramic plates.
The only proof I was doing anything was the flash of light on every point of impact and the groan of pain from the attacker as he blindly tried to get some cover.
I was slowly inching back while still firing because I was afraid I'd run out of bullets in my magazine before managing to put this guy down.
Thankfully though, it didn't come to that because just as I ran out, I heard something break, and the super bandit finally fell.
I took deep breaths and watched in fascination as the leader started flashing green.
Not knowing what to expect, I jumped behind cover and reloaded my gun, waiting.
Instead of the round two I expected, the lights simply stopped flashing, and the leader fell into a lifeless pile on the floor.
"Holy Cow! What the hell was that!?" Now that I was no longer in any immediate danger, the shock of what happened in the past minute finally caught up with me, "did I just encounter a superhuman?!"
Looking back at the corpse, I caught sight of the weapon at his side.
It was a heavy-looking broadsword, and trying to pick it up proved my hypothesis correct because it easily weighed over 10 kilograms.
"Yep, definitely made for a superhuman," but that wasn't even the weirdest part about the weapon. It looked like it also doubled as a gun, with a barrel running through its center and a trigger mechanism placed on the hilt.
Shaking my head, I drop the weapon to the side and look around the room for a place to sit and spot a sofa in front of what probably used to be an intact tv before I showed up.
Sitting down and taking out a medkit, I got to work on my injured arm.
With the ease of only someone with years of practical experience tending to such injuries, "which funnily enough, I do have," I perfectly patch myself up in only a minute.
When packing everything up, I finally saw it through the window.
The moon.
Or, more importantly-
"Is the moon fricking broken?!" I couldn't help but shout.
Even the groan of pain I heard from behind me couldn't distract me from bolting from my seat and launching myself towards the window.
The sun was already on the horizon, so the pale moon showed clearly against the orange background.
And... well... it was broken.
It looked like someone took a bite out of it, didn't like it, and spit the pieces out.
Someone could have hacked the phone. Waking up in an unfamiliar place could be explained by someone drugging me and dumping me somewhere in Europe, even if it is a stretch.
But this?
I leaned against the windowsill and sighed.
"You know, even with all these weird weapons and even weirder anime powers, seeing the moon like this," I mean, even until this point, I was already probably in denial. Still, seeing something like this is just the final nail in the coffin for me, "it really hits home that this isn't really, well, my home!" chuckling at my own joke, I turned back to look at the half-dead leader still lying on the floor.
"F*ck you!" he yelled back before a violent wave of coughing fit overtook him, "What the f*ck are you even on about!"
After eyeing him for a moment, I nodded to myself, "No, you are right," I raised my rifle and slowly aimed it at him, "monologuing is a bit beneath me."
Before the man could voice any protests, a dull *thump* sounded out as the silenced weapon finished the job it had already started.
Now rested and healthy, I eyed the bodies and the room at large for anything of value.
"These guys better not be broke."