Chapter 17: It's a Statistics Thing Chapter Text

It was dark and too bloody cold. Hermione shivered and curled closer to her only heat source as her brain slowly woke up. Fell asleep on the couch again, Hermione . She chastised herself in her mother's voice. Then it came back to her. You fell asleep! She'd put on the telly for something to do, and just like every other time she tried to watch a film, she'd fallen asleep. Her heat source and almost body pillow shifted a little. Malfoy. She blinked her eyes open and tried to acclimatise to her living room's dimness. The fire had nearly burnt out in the grate. She scrabbled behind her and felt for her wand, difficult, given his vice-like grip on her.

Her finger grazed the wood of her wand, and she snatched it, quickly reigniting the fire in the hearth.

Her eyes flicked to his face, now that there was some illumination. He was fast asleep, his head lolling toward her and his mouth in neutral, which was an odd sight. His mouth was always up to something, smirking, frowning, moving endlessly over redundant words, sneering, licking . Stop it. Here it was, this thing that had tortured and delighted her in its resting state, and it was lovely. He had a slight pout as he dozed, and she could see the tiniest bit of drool slipping from the corner of his lips. She stifled a laugh and raised her sweatshirt sleeve to dab at it. She felt him stiffen, his arm tightening around her waist, his eyelids flickered.

"Hello." he breathed quietly, not entirely opening his eyes yet. "You fell asleep." he accused as he arched his back and craned his neck.

"So did you." she chuckled in barely a whisper. Not wanting loudness to interrupt the intimacy.

"It must be late," he glanced at the pitch blackness outside. "I should go." he didn't loosen his grip on her. He looked down at her, something almost pleading in his eyes.

"or you could stay?" she felt the words clot in her throat, never keen to seem needy or less than fiercely independent.

"Is that what you want, Hermione?" His lips twitched into a lazy smile.

"I was made certain promises about tonight." she felt his fingers splay against the bare skin of her waist, her jumper riding high on her body thanks to his eager hand.

"Ah yes," his lazy smile became an all-out grin, "the forbidden hole".

She closed her eyes with mirth as she tilted her chin back and laughed, and right then, when Hermione least expected it, when she wasn't even looking, he decided to kiss her. It was clumsy and childish and the kind of first kiss you have when you're 14. It was perfect. She stilled for a minute, her eyes widening, her lips on his, the calm before the storm. Then she kissed him back, a slow, testing kiss that seemed to sear her lips to his.

"another first, Granger." He muttered against her as he leveraged her body up and onto his. She spread her legs, straddling his thighs and pushing her chest closer to his. He kissed her like his lips were already fondly acquainted with hers like he knew exactly how to kiss Hermione Granger. Ginny had said you could understand how a man felt about you by his kiss. Hermione felt one thing. Loved.

"Malfoy," She pulled back from him, resting her weight on his knees to better look at him. "Draco, I just… despite the poor start, I had a really nice time tonight." she swallowed and pressed her fingers into his chest, stopping him from leaning forward and claiming her again.

"As did I, Hermione." He hooked his hands in her knees and tried to tug her closer to him. She held fast.

"Wait." She needed to say this, to make sure they were on the same path. Lest her heart is shattered into a million tiny pieces. "I… I like you, Draco. I mean the real you, not some version of you I wrote."

"Granger," He succeeded in pulling her back to him, leaning up, so his nose was pressed to hers. "I like you too." He pressed a gentle kiss to her lips. "and you don't do yourself justice on paper, darling." another kiss, he noted her brows remained knitted in consternation. She was a woman who enjoyed plans, directions, info packets with colour coded separators and laminate binding. Draco Malfoy knew instinctively that the key to un-knotting her brow and releasing the tension he could feel in her legs was information. She needed to know in clear terms his intent. "Hermione," he lifted his hands to her face cradling her cheeks. "I hope you understand that this thing which is going on between us is not a frivolous endeavour…" he should have practised this.

"it's not just sex?" she breathed against his wet lips. A shiver trailed down his neck.

"If we're being honest with ourselves, darling, could it ever have been just sex between us?" he drew his thumbs across her cheeks.

"no." she agreed, her brow smoothing, her back relaxing as she melted into him. His acknowledgement enough.

Hermione's heart pounded as she deepened the kiss, his hands moved to her rear, and she ground down on him as she nipped at his lower lip. She pulled back from him again and noted the look of frustration that flitted across his brow with an internal giggle.

"can you take off your shirt, please?" she asked politely, far too politely, given the pressure she felt between her legs.

"only if I can take off yours first." he slipped his hands beneath the hem of her red sweater. "It was very mean of you to taunt me earlier, Hermione." he dragged his fingers up her ribs until they sat teasingly on the underside of her bare breasts. "Every ounce of my self-restraint went into putting this jumper on you. I feel it a fitting tribute to my sacrifice that I get to remove it." his fingers padded across the soft skin, leaving a trail of gooseflesh.

"for your service Malfoy." she nodded, a slight smirk playing on her lips as she raised her hands. Before throwing it halfway across the room, he dragged the red fabric up her body, painfully slowly exposing her flesh to him.

A moment of self-consciousness struck Hermione, and she raised her arms across her chest, a blush creeping up her neck.

"Perfect feels like an inadequate description, Hermione," he muttered as he pulled her arms away and ducked his head to kiss the tops of her breasts.

"I'm not perfect," she almost moved to point out the tiny stretch marks on her hips from her sudden growth in puberty.

"For me, you are." He looked so devastatingly sincere it made her heart clench. Her fingers made short work of the buttons of his shirt, her lips hungrily affixed to his.

Finally feeling his flesh pressed to her front for the first time, Hermione sighed. His skin was smooth and warm. Their kiss became singular in its intent. His hands slid around her back, pushing her closer to him until it felt as though their whole bodies were kissing. She shuddered. "I need… we need… naked," she managed to sputter out as his tongue fought hers for the leadership of her mouth.

"I… agree," he fumbled for his wand, his hand slapping the couch beside him violently, his hurry to disrobe them both evident. Hermione giggled, finding her wand first and banishing their trousers and underwear to her laundry basket. It was the first spell that sprung to mind.

"first time being fully naked together," she whispered and swallowed as she canted her hips up and lowered her hand to him. Their previous sexual encounters, despite being somewhat adaptations of her erotic writings, had been very Draco led. With a confidence born of his words and the way he looked at her, she took the lead, positioning him at her entrance. She slid down his length slowly. Hours of tantalising glances had her more than ready for him.

"you feel amazing, darling," he grunted as he thrust up while simultaneously shuffling lower on the couch, pulling her with him. Giving her knees more room and himself more leverage.

"I like when you call me that." She admitted with a gasp as he bucked into her again, his fingers digging into her hips.

"You roll your eyes every time I do," he noted, letting one hand trail up her torso to cup her breast.

"I roll my eyes at every second word you say, Draco." her utterance fell against his lips as she found a rhythm.

"Ah, so it's a statistics thing." he leaned her back to give himself better access to her chest. "Just as well I find it sickeningly charming then."

"just as well." she agreed before letting out a strangled groan when his teeth nipped at her left nipple.

"This is a first for me," he mumbled against her chest.

"with a girl on top?" Hermione mused as she rocked against him and felt the first coiling of release. He nodded into her cleavage, and she grinned.

"Mine too." she pushed him back and kissed him.

"how?" he moaned as she picked up the pace.

"Krum said 'I'm not a broom' when I suggested it," she said breathlessly as she chased a feeling in the pit of her stomach.

"I'll be your broom from now until all my bristles fall out." he hummed as he watched her lean back and tilt her chin up to the ceiling, her eyes screwed shut in concentration, her hands gripping his shoulders. She looked like a manticore catching sent, tracking her prey. Endorphins pumped through her, causing hopeful thoughts to flood her usually very pragmatic brain as she imagined all the other firsts they could share. First Christmas together. First birthdays. First babies. A primal wave of something coded into her DNA made her quiver at the mere thought of carrying his child. Their child. Her movements became more erratic and wild as she rode him. He stared at her in awe. His fingers were in a bruising grip on her rear, encouraging and supporting her endeavour.

A stuttered moan fell from her lips... and someone gagged.

She looked down at Draco, eyes wide, but he was not looking at her. He was looking behind her. His face was a picture of horrified amusement.

"GET BACK IN THE FIRE!" Harry Potter bellowed, covering his eyes and attempting to push his wife back into the green flames she'd just stumbled from.

"Stop shoving me… Oh!" Ginny managed to sidestep Harry's grip to get a full view of Hermione's naked back and a shock of blonde visible over her shoulder. "Hello, Malfoy."

"Mrs Potter." Draco greeted, his face screwed shut with self-restraint.

Harry Potter wretched again and then let out a shrill giggle. "Get back in the fire." He repeated, trying to cover his eyes and reach for his wife simultaneously.

"I told you that we should have called ahead." Ginny tutted, searching the mantle for the powder box to reopen the floo network.

"I don't know what to do," Hermione muttered, leaning into Draco for modesty.

"Just stay still for Merlin's sake Granger." he hissed through clenched teeth.

CRASH.

"What the hell was…." Hermione tried to crane to see, Draco's fingers tightened on her.

"I think Harry fainted." Ginny piped up, her voice glistening with mirth. Hermione, ever the protector, threw modesty aside and attempted to dismount Malfoy

"Fuckety FUCK!"