Chapter 9: If this are the ninjas in Konoha….

Kakashi knocked at the door of the Dark Hideout. The door opened and showed a gloomy, dark hall. GNEEEEEEK "AAAAAAAAAAAA! Damn! That wrecked remote always has to make the grand effect and keeps scaring me to death! And I always forget about it every goddamned time!...anyway, who's there?"

"OOoee EEeeee e e e"

"CUUUTE! Seen Kabuto? Serves you right! He didn't leave me! He loves me!"

Kakashi felt useless. I mean, he had just showed up right bifore Orochimaru's eyes and all he was doing was looking at Clone!

"Hey there, Orochimaru. How's life?"

"Oh, Kakashi! You're charming as usual! That mask has been in my wildest dreams for ages…want a chocolate?"

"No. I came here for…a bargain." Replied Kakashi acting like a real man who doesn't take a step back even in front of chocolates. But God knew how much he craved for them.

"Really? No chocolates? Want a candy instead?"

"No, thanks. As I was saying…an affair…" which is: "shit, just stop threatening my diet and my macho image, I said NO!"

"Not even a candy? But this way you'll get too slim! Aw, come on, what about a slice of cake? With whipped cream!"

"Orochimaru, I don't feel like eating."

Orochimaru: "ok"

Kakashi: "ok"

O: "Fine."
K: "Fine!"

O: "Perfect"

K: "Aw, alright. Gimme that chocolate, will ya."

Once in the kitchen, the Clone seized the strawberry candies, and Orochimaru remembered Kakashi's words.

"A bargain, you said? You know that I'm not a receiver anymore. You'll have to find someone else for those DVDs of yours…"

Kabuto nodded, as to say: "Yes, he is a serious criminal now."

"Well, it's not that kind of bargain…it's more like…well, I wanted to give you a present!"

Kabuto started to growl under his breath.

"Sorry Kakashi…I just got engaged with Kabuto…you should have noticed before."

The mere thought of sharing his bed with Orochimaru was really going to crack the jounin's steel nerves, but he tried not to puke right then and there.

"OOOEeoooeoooo o oo"

"HERE YOU GO, CUTIE! 4 CANDIES!"

At that very moment Kakashi caught the Clone softened heart of Orochimaru and took the new toothbrush.

"Orochimaru, please accept this present!"
"A toothbrush? Sorry, I've already got one…"

"Right! Orochimaru-sama has already got one. He doesn't need it!" stated a really offended Kabuto.

"But I heard his is already five years old…"

FLASHBACK for those who forgot:

Don't you get it? We just have to give it to him as a present, telling him we believe it's about time to change his old toothbrush. He will be moved, he will cry, he will thank us, he will be life-long grateful to us, he won't attack Konoha and we will be adored as heroes."

END OF FLASHBACK for those who forgot

Orochimaru stood still. He thought about it for a long moment and then, with a lump in his throat, he spoke: "Oh…you..you all love me so much…I'm moved, I'm…oh…sniff" tears welled in Orochimaru's yellow eyes, and fell in the cream cake.

"sob…I…oh, thank you! To you, Kakashi, to Sasuke, to my Kabuto…thank you! You are my only sunshine…sob" Orochimaru hid his face in his hands while sobs were shaking his body.

"Thank you, thank you for being there for me…I owe you a lot….I will be life-long grateful to you! I can't thank you as you deserve it! And you're all from Konoha…what a great village. Konoha is filled of golden hearted people!" these words said, he was in a flood of tears, but said anyway: "I LOVE YOU Especially you, Kabuto…I will never attack Konoha, now I just want to protect her and her wonderful inhabitants!".

After this tears filled moment, the lot heard noises at the door. Kabuto opened it and much to Kakashi's astonishment, there were ALL the villagers of Konoha out there! They all had banners with these words written across them: "KAKASHI AND SASUKE, YOU'RE HEROES!" "SAINTS NOW!" "KAKASHI AND SASUKE FOR HOKAGE", let alone the most popular ones: "KAKASHI AND SASUKE WE LOVE YOU" and "MARRY ME!" Shikamaru stepped out of the crowd holding his banner "FOREVER YOURS" and wearing a ripped t shirt, Shino gave his sunglasses to Kakashi, Tsunade and the other tomboys of the village were wearing a wet t shirt with "WE WANT ONLY YOU TWO!" on them and were squealing like a bunch of rabid fangirls at an anime convention (ahem it's not me, mind you).

The Clone was "eee" ing, while Kakashi was really starting to be afraid of his clairvoyant skills. When the hell did they prepare the banners?

"Perfect. Now Sasuke is ours. Clone, the potion is up to you. Will you be able to do that?"

"E"

"Does it stand for yes?"

"E"

Hey, finally i updated 2 chaps in a row. Thanks to all the reviewers!

Love joo!