'To be beautiful is to be haunted.'

-Childish Gambino, 19.10

Haunted

Deep in the heart of a forest, a pack of wolves were hunting. Their prey of choice? A flame-haired woman with a taste for danger and big, crimson eyes filled with malice. Trailed closely by five snarling beasts, the vampire jumped into the trees, finding it easier to elude her natural enemies by keeping her feet high in the trees.

Isabella Swan was proving to be more difficult to murder then she had anticipated. The russet beast especially, strongest and fastest in the pack, seemed to have a vested interest in her protection. No matter. Victoria was going to destroy him first.

She could smell the saltwater ahead. Fighting off the natural urge to fight and not flee, Victoria jumped towards the Pacific Ocean. There could be no attacking the creature without risking the wrath of his brothers, and Victoria liked having all of her limbs.

Suddenly a pale-grey wolf flew towards her from her left, and her natural instinct was to duck. Ignoring that urge she flew higher into the trees, and the russet wolf that had been expecting her to lower her body crashed into a tree. It had been a trap. She hissed as she had a sudden insight: The stupid mutts had a psychic means of communicating.

That was an annoying complication she had not been expecting.

Victoria smirked as she neared the cliff. With a calculated smile she turned around, blew the russet wolf a kiss, and the dove head first off the cliff. She laughed as she soared through the air. Edward's mate would not be able to hide from her forever. Soon, very soon, she would have her revenge.

Damn bloodsucker! Jacob roared, snapping his teeth at the air and bashing his paws against the earth. His brothers flinched at the show of wrath, even the brooding Alpha himself. Jacob was difficult to control or calm when it came to anything that had to do with Isabella Swan. I'm going to kill that fucking leech!

You've gotta admit though Jake; she's got style. Embry shook out his fur as he spoke. The pale grey wolf loved a good chase.

We must return to our lands, the Alpha said, his mind preoccupied. Chiming Laughter. Emily's brown eyes. A scent like cinnamon. Bella's scent could easily lead her to La Push or Neah Bay. Embry, Jared, you're on patrol. Jacob, come with me. Paul… he sighed get some fucking sleep.

What else would I do with my free time? Paul rolled his eyes. But the wolves were accosted with images of naked women. Many of them.

Let's go! Sam barked. The wolves flew forward.

Death can happen in a heartbeat. But when Embry Call saw it happen, it took only three.

Sue Clearwater was screaming in his head. But the grey wolf barely noticed her at all. He couldn't think past the picture of Harry Clearwater, a gentle man with compassionate eyes and a good father to two amazing kids, and he watched as the man gasped in horror, pressing a hand to his chest as though in deep pain. Three heartbeats later, the old man fell from a chair and hit the floor. Embry knew he was dead.

Dad! Dad! The table shredded apart. Fruit fell to the floor. The smell was sweet, too sweet. Daddy!

Sue Clearwater was still screaming.

Jared frowned. Is that…? That's the Clearwater house!

Seth's a bit young isn't he?

Embry, go get Sam. I'll try to keep him calm.

Be quiet! The new cub snarled. Sam's name had caused him pain. Deep pain. Sunsets. Stars. Loud music. Before the older wolves could make sense of the cub's thoughts Sue screamed again, ripping the cub from its train of thought. The cub pounced towards the living room, disorientated, something pink shredded out of the way. I have to call an ambulance! I have to help dad!

That voice.

Jared and Embry went mute with shock.

Leah? Embry asked through a heart beating too hard and too fast. This couldn't be happening.

What's happening to me? It hurts. I need to help dad.

Leah you need to stay absolutely still or you could hurt someone. Jared ordered, his voice full of disbelief. Embry! Go get Sam! Now!

Without hesitation Embry sprinted towards the reservation, failing to block out Sue's screams and Leah's erratic shouting about calling an ambulance. The grief he could feel from the new cub was so overwhelming he could barely make out the forest around him. It was Leah Clearwater. That Leah Clearwater. But that was impossible, wasn't it? Impossible and different and a dream come true and his worst nightmare all wrapped in one.

Shaking off his thoughts the grey wolf stopped to send a signal to the Alpha, but it was only a few moments before another voice entered his head. It wasn't Sam like he had been expecting. It was a little boy, one of his childhood friends, crying as he ripped apart and his sister roared and raged. Leah was still yelling at her mother to move, and she was begging her father to wake.

Two things happened that day: Leah Clearwater's phase triggered her father's heart attack. And Harry Clearwater's death triggered his son's first phase.

She was standing in a deserted corridor with her back to the rest of the hospital. Outside, the skies were hushed to the muted golds and reds of twilight, preparing themselves for the looming darkness. Haunted, but beautiful, like she was.

Another time, it would have been easier to pretend that he didn't care. She needed him not to care, so that she could move on. But he could not leave her now. Not when she needed a friend.

Sam was unsure of himself as he drifted to Leah's side. He would not touch her – he had promised himself he would to not touch her or do anything to hurt her again. But Leah's hands were fisted in a gesture the Black Wolf was all too familiar with, and her nails were breaking into skin. He was overcome with the strong urge to pry her hands open to stop her hurting herself that way.

'Leah,' his throat burned as though it remembered that her name was both holy and forbidden. 'It wasn't your fault.'

For the first time in over six months Leah acknowledged his existence. Her face turned to his, hardened with rage and grief, 'You've broken every promise you ever made to me Sam, so don't you dare lie to me too.' He flinched at the hatred in her face, at the pain in her words. She didn't care. Her suffering hadn't mattered to him at all. 'Just leave me the fuck alone. Let me bury my dead.'

'I've tried.'

He had seen the rage and fury in her head the moment she'd heard his voice in her head. He had witnessed the fierce nature of her wolf himself. But for many years before he had known the woman too, the girl who had trusted him, who had shaped him into the best man he had been once. He couldn't even remember how many nights she had lain in his arms believing that they were strong enough to carry their dreams. She had seen something in him worth loving.

'We were keeping our eyes on Quil Ateara. The headaches, the mood swings… the angry outbursts. We were sure he was next. We didn't think…' Sam exhaled slowly, and he didn't know how to breathe past the lump in his throat. 'I was trying to stay away from you. I thought that it would be best. And because of it you had to go through this alone. So this isn't your fault Leelee, it's mine. I failed you again, and I'm sorry.'

Leah shook her head. She couldn't think about this. It hurt too much. All of his pain and his guilt could save her no more than it could save her father. Her father who just this morning had held her hand, who just this morning had been laughing with Seth. She had blamed Harry for her own misery, said things she would never be able to take back. So Sam's words meant nothing. Her father was gone. Gone. And she was the cause.

Leah covered her face with her bloody hands and wept.

Sam broke his promise.

Nervous chimes broke the silence as Emily stirred her lukewarm tea and Sue watched her niece with pity, though she offered no words of comfort. There was no predicting how her daughter would react to all the things they had to say.

Leah stepped into the kitchen, her face betraying no emotion, but her eyes lingered on Emily's scarred face a few seconds too long, and her hands fisted at her sides.

'Leah.' Sue stood, 'I invited Emily for tea.'

Sue half expected her daughter to walk away from them without looking back. But Leah did not move save to cross her arms.

One half of Emily's face broke into a tentative smile. 'Hey sissy,' Leah looked like she was going to spit on the floor at the endearment, or leave. But she said nothing so her cousin continued. 'There were things I couldn't tell you before. But I think you deserve the truth.'

A little too late for that, Leah didn't say, though it was in the cruel twist of her sardonic smile.

It had been three weeks since her father's funeral. Enough time for the shock to wear off, for her and Seth to get acquainted to their new bodies, and for Sam to order the two to cut their hair. But she hadn't needed three weeks to realize that Sam couldn't keep his thoughts away from her cousin for more than a few seconds at a time. Sam hadn't told her why that was, but Leah got the feeling she was about to find out.

She also got the feeling, that it would destroy whatever was left of her heart.

'We need to tell you the truth,' Sue said slowly, 'That's the only way any of us will be able to move on.'

'We?' Leah's eyes flashed, 'The only we here is the two of you.'

'Leelee,' Emily's hands left her cup of tea to trail underneath the table, her fingers fiddling with her wool sweater. 'No one was trying to hurt you. We-'

'Oh please Emily.' Leah scoffed. 'It's not even seven months since my breakup and you're engaged to my ex-boyfriend. You were practically living with him the week after he broke up with me. So, tell me, how was that not supposed to hurt me?'

'Leah I meant it at the hospital. I fought i-'

Leah barged out the door the moment she felt heat shooting up her spine. She wouldn't chance it. Just one look at her cousin's face and she knew. She knew. The man she loved would have never done that. Never! That monster wasn't Sam.

And that whore in there wasn't Emily either.

What did that make her?

Her father was dead. Sue had been forced to replace the kitchen table too. It was only the chair, that cursed chair that Emily was sitting in - that her father had died in - that had not been destroyed in the carnage of what they had become.

The cool breeze from the ocean and the sight of the moon above her calmed her. As her heart slowed, Leah made her way around the house and soon found herself in her old tire swing. Her father had made it for her the year she'd turned six, but she had never really outgrown it. Girls didn't outgrow things like tire swings. Not when it was their fathers that made them.

'I figured you'd be out here.'

Leah didn't turn around as her mother approached her, fighting the lupine instinct to growl as Sue the Bull came near.

'Things are not going to be the same! Emily and I are not going to be besties again who paint toenails and talk about Sammy! We are not suddenly gonna have sleepovers again just because I'm the new initiate to Sam Uley's cult.' Leah spat. 'And I don't care. I don't care if they're in love or if they didn't want it or if she fucking fought it because it doesn't change anything. Sam's a liar, Emily's marrying him and dad….' She balled her hands because she had nothing to kick. 'The only person who I ever had on my side is dead.'

Sue folded her arms, and Leah saw the tears her mother still couldn't hide. 'I'm impressed. All of that without phasing.'

The woman leaned against the tree casually. Leah could hear her heart. The she-wolf swore her mother's heart wasn't beating right. It had died with her father.

Leah dropped her head as she fought the tears, feeling so much pain and numbness she couldn't move. It was a long moment before her mother spoke. Her mother's voice was almost cold, detached.

'You're going to go back in there and listen because you need closure. That has nothing to do with me. It has nothing to do with Sam, or Emily or even your father's last wishes that you and your sister make peace. It has everything to do with the fact that you love your sister. You have always loved your sister, and you will always love her. You are not the type to give up on people, and you need to hear what she has to say, so that you can try to find a way to move on from it.'

Leah realized her mother was rubbing her hands against her crossed arms to cause friction. She could barely feel the cold, and she was dressed in a T-shirt and jean shorts. She was always burning these days, sometimes with heat, but mostly just rage.

'We promised we'd be each other's bridesmaids.' Leah said with a bitter smile. 'Their explanation about why they did it, how it happened... it ends with Emily asking me to be a bridesmaid.'

Sue frowned. 'She won't ask.'

Leah laughed. 'You overestimate my cousin.' her eyes watered as she considered the rest. 'And then it'll be years and years, birthdays and bonfires and anniversaries- '

'Leah-'

'Mom just - please just go.' Leah turned away from her mother and stared at the darkened sky.

Only one thing could have saved her, and it was now the one things she would never have. Like the stars, all Leah had wanted after the break-up was a place by herself. Somewhere far away where she could heal on her own without everyone staring in pity. She wanted to be free. But she was a wolf now, a pack animal, and what comparison could be made between the liberty and autonomy and the bondage of supernatural responsibility? It didn't matter if she went indoors and made peace with her cousin. It didn't matter if she ran away. She would phase, Sam would order her to come back. She would never be free.

Not of Sam Uley. Not of Forks, Washington. Not of this curse.

'Alright.' Sue said, 'We'll wait for another hour, just in case you change your mind.'

Emily's place was homey. It smelled of chocolate chip cookies, sunshine and lavender wood polish. It was also green, spotted with bright bursts of color springing from clay pots, and an array of herbs growing in wooden trays by the kitchen sink. All in all, it was a very warm place. It might have felt safer thought, without the four massive boys laughing at the kitchen table. Leah wasn't the insecure type. Before her fallout with Sam had done something ugly to her self-confidence, she had been an incredibly confident girl. But she didn't know how to be alive in this bright place, they were all laughing and happy and chatting with her cousin, and she wanted to be anywhere – literally anywhere – but here.

Seth jumped ahead when he spotted his hero, 'Hey Jake! Hey guys.'

'Sup pipsqueak,' Black grinned before stuffing a muffin whole into his mouth.

Though the wolves looked the same at first glance – cropped hair, serious overaged faces, hard builds, identically horrifying fashion sense - it was easy to spot the differences once one took the time to really study at them. Jacob had round cheeks and always gave off charisma and warmth, even when his mood was dulled by heartbreak like it usually was these days. Paul's face was handsome, and got him a lot of girls (and according to Julie – also boys, but that was a secret) but it was hard to tell with that permanent grimace always on his face. Quil more than made up for Paul though, he was open and trusting and prone to pranks and goofiness. And then there was Embry… Embry Call was a conundrum.

Away from the others, strewn lazily across the only hammock with the casual ease of a model was the boy who usually kept his thoughts to himself. Bar that was a bastard, owned a quad bike named Roxanne and loved a good party, Leah didn't really know anything about the boy at all. The boy kept his thoughts close.

'There you are.' Emily chirped, gesturing to the overflowing table. 'Pancakes?'

Leah shook her head just as Sam entered the house, followed briskly by Jared. The two nodded their greetings to the rest of the pack as the younger wolf dropped into a chair and Sam took Emily's hand. On account of Leah's presence, he didn't kiss Emily's face, thought it looked like it hurt him not to.

'So,' Leah ground out. 'Any good reason we're here?'

Sam nodded but avoided her gaze. 'I thought it was time everyone in the pack was formally introduced. Leah and Seth Clearwater,' he gestured as he spoke. 'And Quil Ateara Junior. Our new initiates.'

'Whoop whoop!' Quil punched the air, and Seth grinned as he jumped up from his chair, tugging the collar of his shirt and flexing his muscles in a Johnny Bravo-ish display of machismo.

'Introducing the youngest, the toughest, the briiiiightest-'

'Sure, sure more like the smallest.' Jacob teased.

'The dumbest,' Jared guffawed.

'The ugliest,' Embry piped in, shooting a quick smile to Leah. Leah found it easy to smile back because Seth was smiling too. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all.

'We'll be taking shifts in turns.' Sam said, interrupting the boys that were still shouting out teases. 'There are enough of us now that we should all be getting a little bit more sleep.'

Paul's eyes rolled to the back of his head as if he was in ecstasy, and Quil grimaced. 'That bad?'

'You don't know the half of it.' Jared replied through a mouth full of bacon.

'So we're gonna split up in teams. Jacob, Quil and Paul you're with me.' Sam sighed, visibly frustrated with all the interruptions. 'Embry, Seth, Leah, you're with Jared. I'll be popping in from time to time to keep the peace.' Leah thanked the heavens silently. Between hating Sam and missing him, she didn't think anything would be more painful than having to spend hours every day around him with the wolf telepathy. 'Any clashes with school or work, figure it out amongst yourselves. And protect each other out there. Remember, we're a team.'

Leah fought the urge to scoff. When her cousin offered her a small smile, an olive branch out in the wilderness, she tried to return it.