Tenel Ka knew the day had been coming, and she'd been dreading it more than anything since her father's death. Ben, Master Skywalker, and most of the Jedi had already departed for Shedu Maad.
Now she had to say goodbye to the Solos: Han and Leia, Jaina, and the girl the rest of the galaxy knew as Amelia.
For the sake of privacy, she joined the Solos on the landing pad and followed them inside the Millennium Falcon. The old freighter had been badly battered during the war, including the time it had been fired upon by Jacen himself, but despite the small changes Tenel Ka noticed as she walked through its halls, it still carried the shabby, well-love airs it had since well before she'd been born.
As she accompanied the Solos to the Falcon's main crew lounge she observed, "This ship is so utterly unlike Hapan vessels it's frankly refreshing."
Jaina smiled at that, a weary, honest smile. There'd been so few of those lately. "What, don't you like your ships pretty and spit-polished all the time?"
"Upkeep is important, but I cannot think of any vessel in my fleet with as much… soul as this one."
"Well, she's passed through a lot of hands over the years," Han said, running his along its padded circular ceiling brace.
"That's true, dear, but you've made it your own," his wife said, hooking an arm into his and leaning her head against his shoulder.
The sight of the them sharing such open, earnest affection clawed Tenel Ka's heart. The times when she and Jacen had been allowed to be themselves and fully enjoy each other's company had been so few. She found herself envying the old couple not just for their well-loved spaceship, but for the freedom to have each other.
Allana interrupted her thoughts by tugging on her grandfather's trouser-leg and asking, "Grandpa Han, who owned it before you?"
"I already told you, darling. It was Uncle Lando's."
"Who owned it before him?"
Han's face twisted in thought. Tenel Ka was surprised he didn't know. The old smuggler gave a lanky shrug and said, "I'm sure I'll remember. Just give me a minute."
"When can I meet Uncle Lando?" pressed Allana.
"Have you been telling her stories already?" Tenel Ka asked.
Han chuckled and mussed her dyed-dark hair. "Why, we can go find Lando, first thing… Just as soon as I figure out where he is. You know Lando, he's always pulling some scheme somewhere..."
Tenel Ka glanced at Jaina. "Will you be staying with your family for a time?"
"I think so," the other woman nodded, hands on her hips. "It's been a long time since I talked to Lando, and and I want to see how Tendra's doing."
"Is there something wrong?" Tenel Ka cocked an eyebrow.
"Not at all. She's pregnant."
Tenel Ka blinked in surprise. New life, after all this. It warmed her just a little. "I hope you all have a relaxing… vacation."
"Yeah, we'll do our best," Jaina said, though her smile faltered. They all knew Jacen was still too much with them.
Leia leaned closer to Allana and said, "You need to say goodbye to your mom now, Allana. It's going to be a while before you see her again."
A while. A nebulous, undetermined time, but what-ever it would be, it would be for too long. Allana detached herself from Han's leg and Tenel Ka bent low to take the girl in her arms.
"Enjoy your time with your grandparents," Tenel Ka whispered. "And stay safe."
"I'll be fine, Mama," Allana said. "I'll miss you."
"I'll miss you too," Tenel Ka lowered her heard against Allana's crown so the Solos couldn't see her expression.
But two of them were Jedi and the third was Han Solo, so of course they knew. As Tenel Ka let go of her daughter and stood up, Han said, "You know how to reach our encrypted freq, don't you?"
"Of course," she nodded. "I will try not to call too frequently."
"Call as much as you like," the old smuggler said, and his voice went uncharacteristically soft. "You're part of the family now, kid, remember that. Any time you need help, we'll come."
She saw it in Leia and Han's eyes both, the softness, the aching concern. She'd known them for over a decade but they'd only started looking at her like that since they learned Allana's parentage. Those looks held so much deep regret, so much pain that could never be healed.
But Allana went back between them, and she saw their faces growing warmer. She did her best to smile back and say, "I must be going. Goodbye, and may the Force be with you."
"You too, kid. Take care of yourself."
"I will." Tenel Ka nodded.
She turned to Jaina, but before she could say anything her friend held up a hand and said, "I'll walk you out. Let's go."
They made their way back to the landing ramp without talking, but once they stood at its top, out of the view the guards on the landing pad and the Solos down the hall, Jaina put a hand on Tenel Ka's shoulder and said, "Think you'll be okay?"
"If Allana's all right, so am I."
"There's no better pair of caretakers in the galaxy. I just want you to know..." Jaina hesitated. Tenel Ka waited for her to find the words. Finally she managed, "I just want you to know I'm sorry."
Tenel Ka shook her head. "Jaina, you of all people have nothing to apologize for. You did what you had to do stop Caedus and there was no way you could have known he was trying to warn me."
"I could have. I could have felt it in the Force." Jaina sighed. "But even if the Jacen in those last few moments… Tenel Ka, I had to do it."
"Jaina, I know. You have nothing to apologize for."
"I wasn't even apologizing for that." She shook her head. "What I'm really sorry for is that I never saw Allana until now."
"She's deserved better than she's gotten on almost every front," Tenel Ka admitted. "I think this change will do her good. Hapes is a poor place to raise a child, especially royalty."
"Yeah, I guess I understand why you wanted to spend all your time on Yavin 4." Jaina attempted one of those Solo grins, but it didn't stick very well. "Still, though… I just wanted to make sure there wasn't anything… Anything I could have done, anything that could have helped you and him and Allana."
She still couldn't say Jacen's name; neither could Tenel Ka. She shook her head. "The decision to hide Allana's parentage was mine. One Jedi parent puts her in enough danger; two would be too much. There was nothing you could have done, Jaina. You can't change what Hapes is. None of us can."
"Well," Jaina swallowed, "It's a good thing Allana's got someone else to take care of her for a while."
"Yes, it is. Will you stay with your parents long?"
Jaina took her hand off Tenel Ka's shoulder, finally, and gave a loose shrug. "Maybe. I don't have any Alliance commission any more and Uncle Luke says the Jedi can deal without their Sword for a while. He's trying to be considerate, but I think I'll head to Shedu Maad soon enough. I can't just sit around thinking, I have to do things. I'll probably go see Jag, too, when he finds the time."
"Jagged?" Tenel Ka raised an eyebrow. "Are you, perhaps…?"
Jaina nodded; her smile was uncharacteristically shy. "I think we've… sorted some things out. Finally."
"I'm glad for you, friend Jaina. You should be with who you wish to be with."
She could barely get the words out without choking. Jaina pulled her in for one more, tight hug, then pulled away. "I'll see you again, Your Majesty."
"Sooner rather than later, I hope. Goodbye, Jaina."
Tenel Ka walked down the ramp to the edge of the landing platform. Guards hovered at arms' length but she pointedly ignored them as she stayed to watch that battered, loved old freighter retract its ramp and landing gear, rise into the air on a buffer of repulsor-energy, and fire its engines. She stayed and watched until the streak of its engine-flare disappeared among the clouds, taking her family with it. Then, finally, she turned and went back to her palace.