It's a short chapter that serves as a way to convey lore, while introducing the concept of the overall multiverse construct that this AU takes place in. That, and we start to dip our toes into the Elden Ring x Harry Potter crossover that will be taking place in this upcoming arc. It also shows more of Yamoori's character, and builds him up to show his motivation and drive, rather than him being evil for the sake of being evil.
Anyways, please enjoy!
Standing at the edge of the unnaturally formed beach that his gang's compound overlooked, Yamoori stood proudly in his casual summer outfit— cigar lit between his smiling lips, as he shook the ice cubes within his diamond-rimmed wine glass. Inhaling the ocean breeze through his nostrils, the completely relaxed head of the gang of psychopaths enjoyed the winds of the ocean flowing through his short-sleeved collared shirt, while keeping his gaze locked onto the glistening waves before him.
"… Beautiful, isn't it? I don't know what it is about the ocean, but I've always been drawn to it. Maybe it's because I grew up in an urbanized village, where it rained every right? It was the dowry noir style that I centered the trademark of my gang around— hence the suits, I've always been a sucker for the classics," Yamoori mused aloud for the hooded woman standing beside him to hear, while not bothering to acknowledge her presence with even a sideways glance.
Peeling back the black hood of the heavy robe she had on, the young woman felt a strange sensation emitting inside of her, as she quietly basked beneath the rays of morning light. With her parted auburn bangs brushed to each side of her head, the engamic woman gazed seemingly emotionlessly out toward the waves of the sea with her one good— the sight of natural beauty was refreshing, albeit alien to the likes of her.
"… I know not of what it is that you are referring too, but I can sense in the longful way that you speak of it, that it holds great sentimental value to you," Melina spoke with a monotonous voice, even though she herself actually found the rushing waves of the ocean before her to be mystifying. "I have never seen an ocean so tranquil before. It seems welcoming and relaxing, and unlike the one that gives off the grim-feeling of isolation and dread where I'm from."
"Yeah, I can tell— from what you've told me, your home's a real piece of shit," Yamoori said crassily with an amused look hidden behind his designer sunglasses, and let out a chuckle while Melina remained visibly unphased by his words. "Not here, nuh uh— I'm the master of this universe, baby! Everything you see and outward is mine, and mine alone… No wannabe gods around to take what they didn't earn… Not me, Melina— I earned every right to be here by my own merit."
"… So you've said," Melina replied back without a sassy tone, but meaning to be rude back to the pompous man as he basked in his own self-righteousness. "From what I have heard and seen with my own eye, these servants and ninjas of yours are formidable… I never thought such power could be obtained by the living."
Smirking uncomfortably at the mention of the word 'living', Yamoori momentarily lost all of his vigor before quickly hiding his fears behind a cocky grin. "… That's why I've brought you to my own little piece of heaven, Maiden. You have the knowledge that I want, and I have the means to actually make use of it," Yamoori said, more so to reestablish his lost confidence rather than reminding Melina what she had already been told countless times already.
"You brought me here, through the 'Throne'? And at the cost of an eternal soul, you wish to become amongst the immortal… I have seen what immortality does to others— it drives them mad… Are you sure that you wish to be cursed with eternal life?" Melina asked, while being genuinely confused as to why someone would want to deny themselves the peace that comes from a true paradise.
"That's where my ambitions differ from those of your 'mad gods' and 'tarnished', who drove themselves to insanity because of their own shortcomings," Yamoori objected, while believing himself to be above those who Melina knew who fell into tragedy while trying to become the 'Elden Lord'. "I have my own world here, and what I say is what I get here. This is my eternal resting place, I've earned it through the blood and souls of others."
"… Such a steep price to pay," Melina said, while giving her condolences to those who Yamoori had sacrificed for the sake of obtaining his own world. "I am sorry to hear that; the path to heaven is unforgiving and cruel, is it not?"
"Nah, not really— stupid weak fuckers got what was coming to them, haha," Yamoori snickered back with an amused giggle, while completely ignoring the fact that his cruelty and lack of empathy disgusted the auburn-haired maiden beside him. "I might be a young stud now, Melina, but one day that'll all come to an end when I die. And once my expiration date hits, Death himself will step down from his 'Throne', and come over my way to collect that I owe him… And believe me, the servant I got stuck with is one twisted sonofabitch— the last thing I want is to spend eternity with him."
Nodding her head, while feeling little sympathy for a man who thought cheating Death himself was the answer to his problems, Melina narrowed her one-good eye toward Yamoori before sighing. "… Which is why you, a mere mortal, wish to obtain the legendary Deathly Hallows, yes? A combined power rumored to be so great when they're brought together, that not even Queen Marika of the Eternal could fathom the potential such relics could possibly possess?"
"That's right ya broad! Why should I fear Death, when I can make Death my little bitch?! Nehehe…" Yamoori chuckled to himself, puffing a cloud of smoke from his cigar while finding himself to be hilarious. "Once I become the 'Master of Death' like how you told me the legends speak of, then I'll finally be able to enjoy my own sweet little slice of heaven, without ever worrying about paying back my dues for the rest of eternity!"
"I see… And you understand that those are just legends, yes? From what I have gathered, no one has ever brought the Deathly Hallows together before— the concept of becoming greater than Death itself is up for interruption, it's not a direct foretold outcome," Melina argued, to which didn't even phase the stubborn man beside her.
"I didn't bring you back into existence for your bullshit opinions, you stupid bitch. I brought you back to help me get shit done," Yamoori scolded while shaking his head, before flicking his cigarette at Melina's head and smirking as he heard her let out a quiet yelp the moment it hit her closed eye. "Now, unless you want me to send your bitch-ass back to the eternal-shit-ring where I saved you from, I suggest you get your Cyclops-ass back inside the compound, and find Kira. He'll introduce you to your team, and explain to your uneducated-ass where the 'entry' point will be."
Feeling insulted and demeaned, but knowing better than to bite the hand that feeds, Melina scowled with her right eye at Yamoori, as she put her hood back over her shoulder-length head of auburn hair. "Understood… You say that this world is yours, and yours alone, yet I am to travel with your men to this dimension's sister-realm? Tell me, if this paradise of yours is truly what you believe it to be, then why is it that you require us to travel there to begin the invocation ritual, and not here, where it's apparently safe?"
"Same reason why I have to go there to have sacrifices brought in to here, and it's the same reason why you're standing here at a beach in an area that's supposed to be landlocked," Yamoori said with a condescending tone, and took a long swig of rose wing from his expensive wine bottle, before letting out a satisfied sigh. "This is one of the many other realities that Madara and Gilgamesh fucked whenever they were chasing after Minato, who was jumping through universes and shit like a game of hopscotch. This is the end of this dimension: time no longer exists the way it does back to where I'm sending you to. The fabric of the space-time continuum has been torn here, and all life native to this universe was wiped out in the aftermath of Madara's pursuit… Are you familiar with the multiverse theory? Or is that concept unheard of to you, in whatever bumfuck universe you're from?"
"… I'm not familiar with this 'multiverse theory', no," Melina replied back with a frown on her face, as she was beginning to contemplate stabbing Yamoori in the back with her sheathed blade.
"Huh, can't say I'm surprised. Judging by the clothes you're wearing, I'm pretty sure that your people still shit in buckets," Yamoori said insultingly, before snapping his large fingers to summon one of the many black 'truth seeking orbs' that his body was able to contain within him. Being able to manipulate its shape into a long-stick, Yamoori was able to display an impressive level of dexterity within his telekinetic ability, as he began to draw a diagram of an upside 'Y' into the sand below.
"See the top of the line there? I'm gonna circle and call that 'Universe Zero'— that's the 'Throne' is, alright? It's the center of everything," Yamoori explained, while taking silent joy from the fact that Medina was actually interested in his lesson, despite the fact that he knew he was pissing her off. "Now, let's take the concept of existence into play. Light, and darkness. Those two variables break off from 'Universe Zero', and now we have two new separate realities that came into existence, because of that mere concept coming into play. It's a water down version of how that actually happened, but I'm just giving you the idea here without over complicating it for you…"
Making two circles at the forked-roads of the upside 'Y' drawing he made in the sand, Yamoori drew more lines out of the two newly drawn circles to represent even more variables. "From there on, you have universes that grow from those major variables, and then those go-on-and-on, and sometimes you have realities that are so similar with such small differences, then they end up bunching together like grapes on a vine! Those are 'sister' universes, and share a lot in common with one another…"
"… Now, imagine two overconfident motherfuckers who decide to say 'fuck the fundamentals of the multiverse, I just want to kill this little blond twink': that's what Madara and Gilgamesh decided to do! Here, let me show you a visual representation of that they did," Yamoori said bitterly, before stomping his foot down on the grape-shaped cluster of circles he drew in the sand— kicking it and getting Melina's black robe dirty until there was only just one singular circle left.
"See all those circles I just fucked?! They can't produce any more universes from them! The fabrics that held them together to the throne?! They're done, they have just been isolated from the 'Throne', and thus time cannot exist, nor can anything ever come from it! It's literally an eternal moment that's destined to repeat for all of eternity! Kind of like whatever bullshit after life those ninjas believe in!"
Processing everything that Yamoori had taught her while he was visibly getting heated from all the pent of frustration he held onto from his past, Medina stared down past the modified truth seeking orb to stare down at the single circle in the sand that was still connected to 'Universe Zero'. "… I see, so time does not exist here, and nothing consequential is possible here… But you're not from here, so that doesn't apply to you or anyone else who's here either?"
"Ding, ding, ding! Correct! You're not as inbred and stupid as you look! Congratulations, you're starting to get WHY I need to be immortal here now, don't you?!" Yamoori shouted with a frantic look in his intense glare, as he tightened his fists into balls by his sides. "Everything I've built from this corpse of a world won't mean anything, if my time here is limited! I'm FUCKED no matter where I go! Here, here's one more fuckin' lesson for you, just so you can see how FUCKED I really I am if I don't get those stupid fucking relics!"
Raising his stick up toward the circle at the top of his diagram, Yamoori drew a deep and jagged line in the sand that connected 'Universe Zero' to the isolated universe down below that was supposed to represent the one that he and Melina were currently in. "See that line?! No matter where I go, which universe I try to flee to, because my servant is an immortal residence of the 'Throne', he will always return there when he dies, and vise-versa, when I die, I'm getting dragged there, no matter where I try to hide! So yeah, I fucking need that 'curse of immortality' that you're flaunting around to be a bad thing, because the alternative to that is an eternity of torument! And I'm not going to exist as that motherfucker's play things for the rest of motherfucking eternity! FUCK THAT!!!"
Stomping around and pacing in a circle, Yamoori shook his head while his facial expression contorted to that of fear-induced anger. Using his truth seeking orb to point directly at the last-remaining circle left behind at the end of his diagram. "Here's where we're all from, including Kira and I… It's because of some asshole named Nagato that we agreed to exchange our souls for the power we got from the Throne… Gilgamesh has Madara's soul, and Nagato's soul belongs to fuckin' demonic nun named 'Sesshōin Kiara', and neither of them are ever coming back… I-I don't want that to be me, Melina. I-I'd rather just stop existing all together, then to end up like those poor bastards… You think I'm cruel? I'm a fuckin' saint compared to those who reside in the Throne… You don't know what cruelty those 'servants' are truly capable of…"
Remaining silent as she watched Yamoori use his floating black orb to turn his cigar and wine glass into dust, Melina stared back at the vulnerable man that had been hiding behind a facade for so long. "… I understand now. You're not afraid of dying or ceasing to exist, you're afraid of what's going to inevitably happen to you, and the thought of being powerless beneath the thumb of someone cruel like you is what's driving you forward… Ironic, isn't it? You've built such a paradise from the souls of others, yet you refuse to pay such a price yourself… You're the embodiment of hypocrisy and cowardice, Yamoori."
If Yamoori didn't need Melina to assist Kira in safely opening a portal to the universe where he could obtain the Deathly Hallows from 'Hogwarts', the large man would have used his truth seeking orb to turn the hooded woman into a pile of dust right then-and-there for daring to speak to him that way; judging by the erie grin that Melina had on her face as she stared back at him, Yamoori could tell that she knew her worth to him as well. "… We're done talking. Leave me," Yamoori commanded, as he turned his back toward her to continue trying to distract himself with the beauty that was the lifeless ocean before him.
Glad to have stood her ground, Melina didn't need to be told twice about leaving the miserable bastard to wallow in his own fear. Turning her back to him, Melina began to take her walk down the shores of where that universe's Hokage Rock once stood proudly over its own version of Konohagakure— her boots sinking into the grains that was once the pride and joy of that Konoha's people, before their lives were cut short by Madara Uchiha and Gilgamesh.
And there we have it! Melina is officially a character in this story who is currently allying herself with the White Suits, while Yamoori's real reason for being so cruel is because he's terrified of what's coming to him. Kira wouldn't really be interested in the Deathly Hallows, because he's not trying to avoid Death. Yamoori, on the other hand, has a reason to want to keep himself as far away from his own death as possible.
Melina was summoned there through the Throne, which she herself doesn't quite understand, but because of Kira and all the knowledge he has of the Throne, he was able to summon Melina to assist him transmute his chakra rituals into more advanced incantations that he himself is unable to perform. Once he learns how to do it himself, he no longer sees Medina as necessary, which is why he plots against her with his fellow White Suits to use her as a distraction. Little do they know, Melina turns on them first the moment she aligns herself with Harry Potter instead of them— he's a lot more honorable than them, and decides that he'll be her champion.
Melina would fit in at Hogwarts, and would be able to start a new life there along with Malenia and Miquella. And the three of them vow to protect their new home, giving Harry Potter the perfect ending he wants with Hermoine, while being able to visit Konoha whenever he wants.
Oh, and that's why Tsunade can't find the White Suits Compound and wipe them off that way— none of them know that they're hiding in one of the universes that Madara and Gilgamesh annihilated. That's why Minato had PTSD, because he witnessed countless people die, all because he led Madara and Gilgamesh to their universe, and had a hand in their demise. To him, he got to see his family and friends die billions of times, all because he couldn't beat Madara and Gilgamesh in a straight fight.
Anyway, RIP No Nut November, let's get to the review.
I'm glad you found Kizashi being a cuck to be entertaining— he has that vibe about him, imo. And exactly, old enough to kill, old enough to fuck. I was thinking of Naruto having Ayame added to his harem, once Jack the Ripper snuggles her out of the dead universe and back to where she's from.
And thank you for the future idea, Naruto could one day suggest to Sakura that they break into school dresses as their younger selves, and fuck where they used to have class at. Naruto could bend Sakura over, and by then she'll have mastered transformation jujutsu enough to take the form of her genin self. Naruto could bend her over the table and have at her.
And yeah, Sakura got so horny because of the glitter bomb trap, that her brain literally convinced itself that she was bisexual. Which will wear off in the morning, but yeah, Minato and Naruto won't have a reason to have beef anymore, once they talk about how he's going to marry Kurotsuchi too.
We'll go with that, Eto was born a woman but one of the White Suit's scientists killed her parents and used her to experiment on trying to make a kunoichi that was powerful enough to kill Madara for them, as they were planning on betraying him and the Akatsuki. They succeeded, but it ended up with Eto growing a dick where her clit was, and her pussy ended up being shifted beneath her new cock. They wanted her on their side, hence why she was off limits, but Konan ended up freeing Eto once she joined Tsunade's efforts in annihilating the old White Suits compound.
Will Eto have a jujutsu to hide her cock, so Kaneki can eat her pussy? I don't see why not, but yeah, you bet that she was fucking Kaneki with it when they were in the ninja academy together, which is why Haise had always assumed that Kaneki and Sen were gay. Haise would try to justify that he's the most normal one out him, Kaneki, Eto, and Ichika, but they still would laugh at him.
Since Haise is bisexual in this one, I think you're right. Ryouko should be his first, then we can add Juuzou and even Haku, who can be the Uzumaki's pool boy. Haku comes over one day to clean the pool, Haise and everyone is outside partying, and Haise gets drunk and mistakes Haku for a girl, so he sweet talks him and gets Haku to fall for him. Haise then asks if Haku wants to come inside with him when no one is looking, and Haku agrees. Haise ends up fucking Haku, and then tries bragging about it to Kaneki, who points out that Haku was actually a guy, and that his brother was too wasted to tell the difference. That's when Haise declares himself bisexual, not because he actually fines men attractive, but because he's tired of getting fooled by traps, and tried claiming to Kaneki that he knew that Haku was a boy the entire time.
I'm totally going to use the ideas you have me for Kaneki's harem by the way, especially having Kaneki take a shota form while Eto sits him down on his lap while she fucks him in the ass, all while Ichika is blowing her brother. Kaneki could be fucking Ichika after that, while Eto is still pounding him from behind in her voluptuous normal form. And having Kaneki being shota for Ichika and Hinami to help break them is a good idea!
So Rize is pretty much dead I think, lmao. So we have Ryouko, Juuzou, maybe Astoflo (Juuzou's servant), and Haku. Hell, might even fall in with the fact that Haise genuinely has a hard time telling the difference between a trap femboy and an actual woman, hence why he ends up getting with them. That, and he is usually too horny to try and think about it, so he just sees that they look like a girl, and that's good enough for him in the moment of passion.
Okay, there we go! Three chapters in one day, that's a new record boys. Alrighty, cya next!