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Chapter 7

The moment Meredith made the introduction he knew. There was no question of how or when, the little boy standing before him, the little boy who's hand he was holding is his son. He has a son and he didn't know it. She got pregnant once before and didn't tell him, how could she do it again. The first time was understandable. They really didn't know each other very well. They were two responsible people doing very irresponsible things. They allowed their passion for each other to cloud their judgement. He knew that the pregnancy resulted from their very first time together, he knew that because that was the only time that they didn't use any protection. The moment was unplanned, spontaneous and beautiful and even though he knew that it should never have happened he never regretted it. The consequences however, he regretted terribly, It cost her a fallopian tube and most of all it caused her a lot of pain both physical and emotional. The physical pain was over but he was quite sure that she had not fully dealt with the emotional pain. Yet into this volatile situation a little boy was born to two highly educated surgeons. His

Should have been the ideal childhood and yet, here he was illegitimate and being raised by a single mother.

Burke could not get over his feeling of helplessness, this was Christopher, the subject of the profound jealousy he felt an hour ago in Cristina's hospital room, now looking at his little boy all he felt was love. How is it possible he thought, that a few minutes ago he had no knowledge of this child and yet now all he wants to do is protect him. He wondered how Christopher would react when he is told that he was his father. He kept saying the words "I'm a father" over and over in his head, he always knew that one day he would have children, but he never in his wildest dreams thought it would be like this. He wanted to be there when his children were born and he wanted to cut the umbilical cord, Cristina robbed him of that experience. Yet, he couldn't hate her. She had given him the most precious gift, a son. From the moment he met Cristina he was drawn to her like a moth to a flame, the only word to describe how they reacted to each other was reckless and the result of that recklessness was standing in front of him. He was still lost in thought when he felt a tug on his arm, he looked down at Christopher and the child asked, "Are you my mommy's doctor?"

"No, Christopher, I'm a doctor but I'm not your mommy's doctor."

"Can you make my mommy better?"

"Actually, your mommy is doing a lot better so maybe in a few days you'll get to see her."

"That's what Auntie Mere said but I want my mommy now." The child look so sad that Burke just wanted to pick him up and give him a hug. He thought about how lonely the child must feel he was used to having his mommy around and there was no way a child so young can understand why a parent can't be with him.

All through the exchange between Burke and the Christopher Meredith stood quietly watching them with tears in her eyes. She wished Cristina were here to see her son, she would be amazed to know that her little boy who did not speak to strangers had no hesitation about speaking to Burke. It's as if he knew that Burke was someone special. Meredith took the child from Burke strapped him in his seat and closed the door, then she stood outside the SUV and spoke to Burke. "She wanted you to meet him."

"A little too late don't you think, what am I suppose to say to him, hi, I'm your father."

"No, I think you and Cristina will have to discuss how to tell him, right now just be mommy's friend."

"My son calls me Dr. Burke, you're Auntie Mere, you have a relationship with him, doesn't it seem wrong to you."

Meredith looked at Burke and smiled, "no, not really, I'm his godmother, I've been there since day one. My name is on the list at day care so I can drop him off and pick him up. I'm the person who buys him Ice cream when his mother says he shouldn't have any, I'm the person who let him have carrots because he hates peas, I'm the push over, he can wrap me around his little fingers and he knows it. He cannot do that with Cristina, but the love he has for her is beyond anything he'll ever feel for me. And it will be the same with you. Just wait until he finds out that you're his daddy."

Burke was thoughtful for a moment, he hoped Meredith was right, he didn't want to be a disruption in his son's life but he would like to get to know him. "He's very smart for his age isn't he."

"You haven't seen anything yet Meredith replied."

Meredith was lost in thought for a moment, she wanted to find a way to put Burke's mind at ease, then she thought of the perfect solution. "Tell him your name, not Dr. Burke but your real name. See what he says."

Burke went to the other side of the SUV but instead of sitting in the passenger side of the front seat he went to sit with Christopher.

He sat next to the child and ever so often he found himself just looking at him. He thought about how wonderful it would have been to have known him as a baby and to watch him grow into this beautiful little boy. He didn't want Christopher to see him watching him so he started to talk to him instead. "You know, you don't have to call me Dr. Burke, you can call me Preston."

"We have the same name," Christopher said thoughtfully.

Burke wasn't sure if Christopher understood what he said so he tried to make him understand,

"You are Christopher and I am Preston,"

The child began to giggle, "no, silly my name is Preston too, Christopher Preston Yang"

Burke smiled and ruffled the little boy's hair because he didn't know what else to do. He thought of Cristina and how much he loves her, she was so infuriatingly complex and yet when least expected she does the most amazing things. She had their child, on her own without even telling him, and yet she paid him the highest compliment, she gave their son his name.