Title: The Pickpocket and the Witch
Fandom: General Hospital
Characters: Tracy Quartermaine
Prompt: #26 Pickpocket
Word Count: 3,190 words
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Tracy confronts Lulu about her choices.
Author's Notes: Yeah, I'm going there. Gonna stick my nose into the whole Lulu's pregnancy storyline. So. There.

Tracy was on the couch when Lulu arrived. She'd been summoned, of course. Lulu didn't care who Tracy thought she was; she didn't like being summoned. The truth was it was curiosity more than obedience that had made Lulu show up for the "talk." There had been nothing of threat or manipulation in Tracy's voice when she called. Sure, it could have been bad cell reception, but her StepMonster had actually sounded kind when she asked her to lunch.

So Lulu came, if only to restate her independence, if only to make sure at least Tracy understood that she was not going to be a pawn in some medieval Quartermaine inheritance game. Edward wanted an heir; Tracy wanted a grandson. Dillon wanted to do "the right thing," whatever the hell that was.

In their rush to determine the course of the baby's life, a baby that wasn't even the size of a thimble yet, the Quartermaines didn't really care too much about the life they were wrecking—Lulu's. They didn't care at all that she was facing a future that was more horrible than she could imagine.

Tracy sat there, quietly, waiting for her to settle before talking. She was dressed casually—not jeans and a tee-shirt, of course. Casual for Tracy meant the smaller jewels, loose-fitting tunic over soft, floating pants. Casual meant her claws were sheathed, and her guns were on safety lock.

"You summoned," Lulu said sarcastically as she plopped down in the chair opposite her step-mother.

"I wanted to talk to you without distractions." Tracy's tone was neutral, her voice soft. "I know you're feeling pressured, and I thought we could talk without them around to muddy things up with all that emotional garbage."

Lulu had to laugh. "Oh, and you think this isn't pressure? I've never eaten a meal alone with you in my life, and now you're summoning me to lunch?"

"We can go to Taco Bell, if it'll make you feel more at home," Tracy offered, a slight hint of whimsy attached to the sarcasm in her tone.

"Yeah, right... If you're paying, I'm eating lobster." She matched the sarcasm, not wanting to give Tracy an inch, knowing that if she smelled weakness, her StepMonster would go for blood. "So, the plan is to lull me into a stupor with heavy food, and then get me to sign some legal document giving the Quartermaines complete control over my body?"

Tracy sighed, her expression clouding as she brushed a strand of hair from her eyes. She'd let her hair grow out—it was short when Lulu had first arrived at the QMansion, tapered around the neck. Very butch, Lulu thought in retrospect. Now it was near her shoulders, softly curling in gentle waves. It was false advertising, of course, making Tracy look kinder than she was, gentle and soft.

There was nothing gentle or soft about Tracy Quartermaine. This was common knowledge.

"I'm not my father," Tracy said quietly. There was a hurt in her tone that rattled Lulu's resolve. She knew that hurt. She knew that tone. "I'm not going to force you to do anything at this time." The 'at this time' was pointed, and Lulu rolled her eyes at it. "But you're eighteen, you're pregnant, and you're scared. Your father is not here at the moment, and unfortunately your mother isn't in a position to help."

Lulu bristled at the mention of her mother. Tracy wasn't fit to speak her mother's name, much less assume some position of maternal authority or right. Whatever game she was playing, she wasn't going to fall for it. "I'm fine," she snarled, crossing her legs and turning away from Tracy's intense gaze. "I can manage on my own. I don't need you getting involved."

"I am involved. I have been since the first time I met you." Tracy smiled at the memory. "You were stealing twenties out of Skye's wallet. The only person in the whole house who defended you, and you were picking her pocket." She nodded, her smile turning to a knowing smirk. "I figured out then and there that I needed to keep an eye on you." There was a momentary hesitation, then, "Guess I didn't keep a close enough eye on you, huh?"

"Guess not."

"You know, we don't have to go out. I could have Cook make us lunch, and we can eat it out on the patio. The roses are—"

"Can we just cut to the chase, Tracy? Can we just stop pretending that you have any desire to spend time with me?" Lulu folded her arms across her chest. "You want to tell me what to do with this thing inside of me. You want to soften me up so that I'll be more open to your plot, whatever it is. Why go through the motions and indigestion of lunch? Just tell me what to do, then I'll ignore you, and we'll have both have the afternoon free."

Tracy took a deep breath, steepling the fingers of her hands together as she rested her chin on her thumbs momentarily. "It's not a thing. It's a baby. You need to keep that straight."

"Oh, okay. I get where you're going." Lulu bristled, wondering how much Dillon had told Tracy. She felt no love at all for the father of this child in this moment. He seemed so cool sometimes, but when the chips were down, he was still a mama's boy. Still letting Tracy run his life and, apparently, be the bad guy. "Listen, this isn't medieval Europe, okay? You can't force the little peasant girl to bear her child just because Lord Edward owns the castle and wants an heir."

"Actually, it's Lady Monica who owns the castle," Tracy said with a smirk. "As she is so happy to tell anyone who listens..." The joke fell on deaf ears, and Tracy continued with a sigh. "Look, this is America, and we live in the 21st century," Tracy said. She had leaned back into the cushions of the couch, her gaze intense, her eyes never leaving Lulu. "You are of legal age, barely, and you have a choice. Believe it or not, I fiercely believe in choices..." Her voice trailed off, and Lulu could almost hear the unspoken words…having had so few in my own life. "As much as I want my son to have what he wants in this world, and as much as I'm going to fight to get that for him, I thought…"

"You thought you'd come to me privately, throw money or threats at me, try to get me to do what Dillon wants, no matter how much it destroys my life?"

"I thought I'd meet you on neutral ground, talk to you woman to woman, and discuss your options with you," she said gently. "Tell you the truth about things, since nobody else here wants to do that."

"What kind of truth?"

"The truth about being a Quartermaine. The truth about what happens if my father gets what he wants." Tracy's tone sent chills up Lulu's spine. She wanted to interrupt, but found herself uncharacteristically unable to speak. "My father wants an heir. My father thinks women are sub-species, incapable of controlling an empire, so my grand-daughter Brooke and I are completely unacceptable. Ned and Dillon have expressed no interest in or aptitude for the family business. Jason's a hit-man for the mob. A.J.'s son has been completely and irrevocably corrupted by your cousin Carly and her mobster friend Sonny." She sighed, looking Lulu up and down. "I hate to break this to you, kid, but that thing inside of you is looking to my father like his last, best hope of passing ELQ and the Quartermaine empire down to an acceptable heir. I pity you."

Lulu shook off the chills that went down her spine. For all her comments about medieval lords and stuff, having it put so bluntly was unnerving. She wasn't a person at all to Edward, just the creature carrying something he wanted, just a means by which he could get an heir for his fortune. "I don't want your pity." Her words didn't come out as strong or confident as she wanted them to.

"No, of course you don't. You think you have it all planned out. You're smart enough to know that Daddy is not going to let a potential heir slip through his fingers, and that adoption is a pipe dream."

"Wow." Tracy's word cut through her like a knife. She'd never actually put the thought together, but the instinct had been there. This was a Quartermaine baby, for all the Spencer she had in her veins. And the Quartermaine family was an octopus, tentacles everywhere, spewing poison wherever they went.

"You're thinking about having an abortion."

To her surprise, there was no accusation in Tracy's tones, no anger or emotion at all. Just the words, harsh and raw, hanging there between them.

"Yes," she whispered.

Tracy nodded, her lips pursed, her eyes distant for a moment. "You've read all the brochures, I'm assuming?"

"I can quote them to you."

"You don't need to. I've read them before."

Lulu looked up, surprised, confused. Tracy was staring at her, arms tight across her chest, her face soft and sad. For a moment, she felt tempted to trust her, to think of her as a person, as a woman, rather than the viperous bitch she truly was. For a moment, she wanted to think this person actually gave a damn about her. "Well, then you know it's safe and legal and my choice if I want it."

"You can never change your mind. You can never turn around. You can never bring her back."

"Her?"

"The baby you abort. The life you terminate. You can never bring her back, once you make the decision." Tracy closed her eyes, her breath deep and labored. "I know there are times when it's the only choice, when it's the only logical and safe and humane choice. I know that you think abortion will make all this trouble go away and will keep you out of my father's grasp. What you don't know is that you will live with it for the rest of your life. You will never, ever stop wondering. You will never, ever stop second-guessing yourself."

"Spare me the pro-life rhetoric."

"I'm Choice," Tracy reiterated. "I am not pro-abortion. I think it's a horrible, sad, terrible thing to do. I also know sometimes in life, you have to do horrible, sad, terrible things. When you have no options left, when you have no other recourse..." She reached out to stroke Lulu's hair, and for the life of her, Lulu swore she saw something in Tracy's eyes that looked like love. "But you have options, you have recourse, Lulu. You don't have to take this option, do this thing you can't undo. I know my father is overwhelming, but I've spent decades fighting him. I can help you fight him, too. I can help you have this baby, get it away from him if you need to, even if that's not what I'd choose. I have the resources to make sure you and the baby have everything you need, even if you don't keep it. And if you choose to give it up for adoption, I can help you get the baby placed in a good home where Daddy will never find her—"

"Oh, stop it! Just stop it!" Lulu put her hands over her ears. "You're just as bad as Edward. You think throwing money at this is going to make it better. You think it's going to make up for what I lose, the experiences I won't have…"

"I think you're single and pregnant and no matter what you choose, you're going to pay for the mistake you've made." Tracy's voice was hard as nails. "Boo-hoo, you won't have a prom. Boo-hoo, you might have to be private tutored instead of going to your senior year with your friends. You want choice? You chose to sleep with my son. That was a very grown-up choice, Little Lulu. Here's the pay-off: now you get to choose to be a grown-up and figure out what to do with that child you and Dillon created."

"You're a cold-hearted bitch."

"Call me all the names you want, Lulu, but you know it's true. And let me tell you something, there are no good choices for you right now. You are in a crappy situation, and you have to make some hard decisions. But I will tell you right here and right now, there are some decisions you will never get over."

"Please…."

"Lulu…"

"You act as if you know what I'm going through. You act as if you know what I'm feeling. You have no idea."

Tracy paused, dropping her arms, leaning forward slightly. Her gaze was intent, her voice hard and low. "I know more than you'd ever imagine about what you're feeling. I was your age when I got pregnant with Ned. I was scared out of my wits. I knew about ten seconds after the wedding reception that my marriage to Larry Ashton was a mistake, and I was trapped in a situation I didn't want or know how to handle. I had not only my family pressuring me to get pregnant, but Larry's family. You think bearing a Quartermaine heir is pressure? Try walking around nine months carrying the next Lord Ashton."

"Ned is a Lord?" Lulu blinked. How had she missed that one?

"No. Long story, involves lies and blackmail," Tracy said dismissively, as if that explained everything. "Fact is, I had no choice. I felt trapped and overwhelmed and scared out of my wits. And consequently, I was a lousy mother and have nothing to show for my troubles but a strained adult relationship with my son and no relationship at all with my granddaughter."

"You're definitely making the case for me keeping this kid," Lulu said sarcastically.

"When I got pregnant with Dillon, I was married to a man who not only didn't love me, he actively hated me. His girlfriend/mistress was married to Ned. My life was total chaos. My relationship with my family was tenuous at best, and frankly, pregnancies over thirty are not exactly risk-free. Another situation where I agonized over whether to keep my baby."

"Again, not making a big case for keeping the kid."

"Dillon was the best thing that ever happened to me in my entire life," Tracy said softly, honestly. "I wouldn't have survived the next few years of my life if I hadn't had him with me. I wouldn't have had a reason to…"

"Well, that's charming and I'm sure it will make a great movie of the week someday—" Lulu started to stand. She wasn't at all comfortable with this walk down Tracy's memory lane. She didn't like Tracy. She didn't want to share confidences with her, girl talk, hopes and fears. That was what a mother was for, and Tracy had no right—

"Those were the two good pregnancies," Tracy whispered. "Sad as it is, the situation when I got pregnant with my daughter was much, much worse."

Lulu sank back onto the couch, stunned. She stared at Tracy, trying to figure out the game she was playing. She couldn't see any sign of artifice, or even emotion, on her step-mother's face. "You had a daughter?"

"I got pregnant between Ned and Dillon," she said. "I was estranged from my family, broke and working for a large company in Europe. My money situation was less than stellar." She bit her lower lip slowly, her eyes turning away. "I was drinking more than I should have, more than I do now…"

"Whoa."

"Yeah. I got involved with a man who I never would have talked to had I been in my right mind, a man who unfortunately had a tendency to…um…" She hesitated, embarrassed, Lulu thought. "He wasn't the nicest man," she continued. "When I got pregnant, I knew I couldn't keep the child. I knew I couldn't let him know I was pregnant. I knew my family wouldn't take me back, and I didn't have the money to run away." She shook her head. "It's a bitch being dependent, Lulu. It's a bitch being broke and alone."

"Yeah," was all Lulu could say.

"Any child born into that situation would have be born into a nightmare. I knew what I had to do, and I did it."

"You had an abortion?" Lulu was stunned.

"It was quick, relatively painless, and I will hate myself forever for it. I will go to my grave thinking, I should have tried harder, I should have groveled, I should have begged my family to take me back. I should have done something, been smarter, braver, better." Tracy shook her head, her face screwed up slightly in pain.

Lulu didn't know what to say. She couldn't think of anything to say. She had a gut instinct that Tracy had never told this to anyone, that Tracy had never had a reason to tell this to anyone. She also knew if she ever breathed a word of it, Tracy would hunt her down and destroy everything she loved in retaliation.

"I know in my heart it was the best choice I had at the time, and that any other choice would have been irresponsible and wrong. And I still grieve for it twenty-five years later. I grieve for the daughter I didn't have, for the life she didn't live, for the chance I took away from her." She wiped at her eye roughly with the palm of her hand. "You need to know that, if you're going to make a responsible choice, kid. You're a decent person who has options and people coming out of the woodwork to help you though this. I'm a heartless witch with no conscience or decency. When I was pregnant, I was truly alone, and the father was a jackass who liked to hit me. I had nobody to turn to and abortion was absolutely the right choice." She breathed out hard. "…and I still haven't gotten over what I did." She stood, brushing off her trousers as if to say this was the end of the discussion. "No pressure. Just something to think about."

Lulu rested her head in her hand. She felt sick to her stomach, and the sympathy she felt for Tracy wasn't helping the headache she was developing. "It's so hard," she whispered.

She felt a hand on her hair, looked up to see Tracy's gentle gaze looking down on her. "I know, Little Lulu." Her mouth quirked up in a sad, half-smile. "It is a lousy situation."

"Yeah."

"You still want that lobster?"

Lulu laughed weakly. "I'm not hungry anymore." Then, without really knowing why, she added, "Taco Bell sounds better."

Tracy laughed and rolled her eyes. "Disgusting. My treat?"

"Yeah…" And she stood, heading out to Tracy's Mercedes to have their first lunch together as step-mother and step-daughter.

The End

Written for the LJ 100 Situations ficathon.

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