Summary: When Harry made up his mind to do anything to destroy Voldemort, he had no idea it would include werewolves, elves, the Veil, the Chamber of Secrets, wandless magic, Azkaban, unimaginable power, his own army, and… a secret identity?
Disclaimer: I own… (Pulls dryer lint out of pocket) …absolutely nothing!
From now on, Harry was going to make his own decisions, and if it came to it, his own mistakes.
With that thought in mind, Harry, for reasons he couldn't explain, let go, and silently cried himself to sleep.
Chapter 8: Hooray for Blackmail
Harry woke up the next morning feeling like a boulder had just been lifted off of his chest. He was back among friends and today, he would do something useful. But at the thought of Fudge's office, a bit of nervous tension slinked in. He swallowed it and returned to his joyous mood, and decided to do something nice for Mrs. Weasley. She was putting up with him after all. Harry then resolved to wake up Ron. Unfortunately, just shaking him wasn't going to work...
"'Arry! Getom offa may!"
"Sorry Ron, but it's time to get up, 'Sunshine'!"
"You're not sorry. And it's not even sunny out yet… Bloody hell! It's six o'clock in the morning!"
"Yep, I got to sleep in. Come on let's go make breakfast!"
Ron rubbed his eyes in bewilderment, "Breakfast? You want us to make breakfast?"
"I think it would be nice to give your mum a break, yeah," Harry shrugged. "Besides, I've never had any of your cooking before."
"That's because I can't cook."
"Oh, come off it Ron! Now get dressed and get downstairs."
About fifteen minutes later the duo was dressed and in the kitchen digging around for different cooking utensils.
"OK," Harry said, looking at the things he and Ron had gathered. "We have pots, pans, and all the ingredients we need. I wish we had some Muggle appliances, it'd make this so much easier…"
"Dad has some in the other room," Ron suggested, "He's studying them, but he hasn't figured out what they do yet."
"Then what are we waiting for? Let's get started!"
Arthur Weasley's 'Muggle contraption's' as Ron called them, turned out to be an electric mixer, a toaster, a blender, a waffle iron, and an electric can opener. Armed with their supplies, the boys set out to make the morning meal. And about half and hour later, to the sound of the Wizard Rock Radio Station, they were well on their way to making enough food to feed a small army. Not enough to feed the Weasley's, but a small army certainly.
"OK, I admit it," Ron grinned over at Harry, who was not only controlling all the meat (bangers, sausage links, and bacon), the hash browns, and the fruit salad, but also had control of the pancakes, which he was currently flipping to the beat of the music while stirring another batch of batter. "Cooking is fun. Ooh, I love this song!"
Harry grinned as well, and couldn't help singing along with Ron about some poor Quiddich punk who was dumped by his girlfriend and ended up going to the World Cup. Ron wasn't doing too badly for his first time not trying to avoid preparing meals. Though he himself had the most things to do, Ron was holding up rather well with the eggs (with and without cheese), toast, and waffle iron. It was nice to have a companion in the kitchen for once, one that doesn't insult your every move that is. But even Harry had to admit, Aunt Petunia was an excellent chef. She actually had a degree in the culinary arts, and used to work for a posh restaurant before she had married Vernon. She really had taught him everything he knew.
"What are you to doing up at this ungodly hour?"
Harry and Ron both jumped as they turned around to face Hermione and Ginny who were standing in the doorway in their PJ's.
"Bookworm pajamas?" Ron laughed, "Only you, Hermione."
Hermione tried to glare but she only ended up in a giggle fit. Ginny, however, did manage to glare. She was wearing black pajama bottoms with a jet-black tank-top that had 'It's All About Me' written on it in large white letters with an annoyingly cute-looking rabbit perched on top of it.
"That pronouncement does NOT answer my question, Ronald."
"Don't call me that! And what do you think we're doing? De-gnoming a garden? We're cooking, duh!"
"And making a racket! We could hear the commotion from upstairs…"
"Well it must not be that loud, no one else is up!"
"That's because the adults can actually put silencing charms on their rooms…"
Deciding to stop the exploding sibling rivalry going on, Harry cut Ginny off, "Quit the hostility guys. Ron and I are sorry we woke you, but as long as you're up, wanna help? You can make the cinnamon rolls and the omelets."
This made the girls perk up immediately, and they both agreed to help. It wasn't long before Mr. and Mrs. Weasley came down to a plethora of food on the dining room table, all covered with this nifty kind of plastic wrap that would keep food exactly as it was the moment it's covered. Needless to say, Harry had never been praised so much about his cooking skills as that morning, and as he had thought his peers were making too much of a fuss, he had no idea how to take Mrs. Weasley's reaction.
"You kids made all this YOURSELVES! You sweet little things! And so thoughtful! I LOVE YOU ALL!"
Ron and Ginny flinched as their mother somehow managed to gather them and Harry and Hermione into her arms for an enormous hug. Yep, Harry was definitely confused, and his muscles instantaneously tensed. Hugging was something he undeniably was not used to.
"Don't strangle them, Molly!" Mr. Weasley chuckled as Ron began to dramatically call out for air.
As Mrs. Weasley let them go, Bill and Charlie walked in, and her two older sons got their turn to be asphyxiated, or so Ginny called it when one was hugged by her mum.
"Bill! Charlie! I didn't know you were stopping by!"
"Yeah, well, Bill told me about last night's meeting, so I stopped by to see how everyone's doing over here… Are those cinnamon rolls?"
"Hey! You got this doohickey working! Good job son!" Mr. Weasley praised Ron exultantly as he placed a hand on the red-hot waffle iron, "OWWWW!"
In only a short while, Order members started showing up to see exactly how 'Mission Blackmail' was going to turn out, and ended up staying for breakfast. Even Fred and George were aroused by the aroma of sizzling bacon, and eventually made it through the length of space between their room and the basement in nothing but matching Bludger pajama bottoms. And according to them, walking that far was pure agony. Lupin, in due course, appeared as well, but only after Mrs. Weasley dragged him down, told him that he was not imposing, and reminded him that he needed to, 'put some meat on his bones'. But the most unexpected occurrence happened in the middle of the meal when Dumbledore Apparated onto the center of the table, miraculously, not stepping on anything.
"My, my, this is quite a feast is it not?" He said observing the entrées below him before springing onto the floor, "Well Harry, I'll be ready to leave when you are, so I guess I'll just hang out here. Remus, would you like to come as well?"
Lupin involuntarily dropped all eating utensils he was holding onto the floor, "For what? I'll only make you and Harry look bad!"
"Why for moral support of course!" The Headmaster stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"That'd be great," Harry said, "I'd love for you to come along."
"And you may just see that Elaina woman again. You two seemed to get along well." Mrs. Weasley added with an astute look.
Remus just ducked under the table to retrieve his fallen fork and knife, "I'll go."
"Can I come and be moral support too?" Ron asked, putting on his best pleading appearance.
"I'm afraid not," Dumbledore responded; he really did look sorry. "We need to have as many spies within the ministry as we can, and showing up at this may endanger your father's career. Miss Granger can go if she pleases though."
Hermione looked over at a downtrodden Ron and sighed, "No thanks, Harry has Professor Lupin. So I suppose I'll stay here with Ron."
Ron gave a happy 'whoop' at this and shouted gleefully, "I'm not going to be alone in this house with my family!" Then quickly, at the look on his mother's face, added, "Not that that's in anyway bad…"
It is said that time flies when you're having fun, and Harry would definitely regard that declaration as true. For it seemed like no time at all when he was at the magical phone booth with Dumbledore, Lupin, and Mr. Weasley, who kept pointing at Muggle cell phones and randomly asking people strange questions about their portable CD players.
The trip down to the Main Entrance proved uneventful, as did the wand check and Mr. Weasley then went his separate way. As the other three made their way to the Minister's office, however, they were met with an extremely annoying, young, eleven-year-old errand boy.
"Can you PLEASE sign the Quibbler article that says you're going to save the world using Chocolate Frogs and Zonko's products?" He asked Harry for the eleventh time.
"No!" Harry repeated, "For the hundredth time, I don't do autographs!"
"Well can you sign the one that says you're a total lunatic and that you're going to destroy the Universe?"
"No!"
"What about the one that says you're really the Easter Bunny in disguise?"
"NO!"
"Oh," the kid said looking downtrodden for about two seconds before brightening and turning to Lupin, "Well, can you autograph this article about how yesterday at your trail you escaped, turned into a werewolf, and ate the Minister of Magic?"
Lupin raised his eyebrows, "The Minister is still alive."
"That's what government officials want us to think…"
Dumbledore, on the other hand, seemed amused, "How about," he said to the boy, "I sign something, and you leave us alone."
"OK! Put you're name right here by this political cartoon of you secretly building up an army of Crumple-Horned Snorkacks while stealing money from Gringotts and helping along a thriving population of monkeys who want to kill these Trollics. Because the monkeys were enslaved in this…"
It took quite a while for the kid, whose name turned out to be Josh Cauldrona, to shut up. And once he was back on his way to deliver some papers for his dad, they had a pretty smooth trip up the elevator. But just as they were approaching the high security area, in which the official's offices were located, they ran into a familiar face.
"What are you doing here?" asked a flabbergasted Percy Weasley.
"None of your beeswax," Harry answered, really not wanting a discussion with Percy right now.
Too late. Percy had them all hauled to a deserted office in about five seconds.
"Are you planning to ask something of Fudge?" he demanded, talking quickly.
Harry could only stare.
"Indeed, young Mr. Weasley," Dumbledore had a twinkle in his eye as he said it.
"He's not going to give you what you want."
"Excuse me…" Harry began before Percy interrupted him.
"I'm not through! You won't get what you want without leeway. I have some," and before anyone could say anything, Percy started to list some very interesting information. "Fudge has been using government money to fund things not approved of by the Council, like things for himself and money to cover up mistakes he's made. I overheard him telling Umbridge that he didn't care what she did, even if she broke the law, he just wanted Hogwart's students to believe that You-Know-Who was still dead. He…" Percy stopped as Dumbledore raised his hand.
"This is all very remarkable Mr. Weasley, but I fear we are late. You see, Harry has provided us with some very interesting information of our own. Yet what you've said will help a great deal. Why don't you head over to a special headquarters tonight and tell us more? Take this," Dumbledore handed him a piece of paper, "It's charmed so only you can read it, but even my charms can be broken if Voldemort gets involved. Hide it and when you have memorized it, destroy it. Preferably by burning it and flushing the ashes down the loo. Do I make myself clear?"
Percy nodded, and then gave a cautious glance toward Harry and Lupin that turned into a smile when Lupin thanked him profoundly, and Harry's mouth twitched upward. Then he departed.
At long last, Lupin, Dumbledore, and Harry reached the Minister's office, and were met by the one, the only: Dorklores Pain Umbitch.
"YOU BROUGHT THE WEREWOLF!" she screamed at the top of her lungs, "WHY DID YOU BRING THE WEREWOLF?"
"He is merely here to escort us to your office Dolores…" Dumbledore started calmly before being interrupted.
"But the WEREWOLF?"
"I do have a name Ms. Umbridge, and it is not 'werewolf'." Lupin added as politely as he could.
"How dare you!" Umbridge looked as if she had been personally insulted, "You," she pointed a pudgy finger at Lupin, "need to learn how to respect your betters. In fact, all of you do! Let me give you all a little lesson."
She then pulled out a muggle slide projector before continuing to completely weird Harry out.
"Now see here," Umbridge demanded, extinguishing the lights with a flick of her wand while turning on the slide projector. She put in a slide, "First, there is the most important, respected person in society, the top of the food chain: Cornelius Fudge!"
The projector showed a picture of a very regal-looking Fudge. It was supposed, Harry assumed, to make people gaze in awe. He only felt like laughing... or puking.
"Next," Umbridge continued in that sickeningly sweet voice of hers, "There is me!"
She looked so pleased with her picture which depicted her imitating a, what was intended to look like a sexy pose, that Harry had to snort like a maniac behind his hand to avoid doubling over.
"After that it's our closest friends and family." This slide depicted a bunch of snobbish looking pureblood wizards, which included Lucius Malfoy. "And after that, is the purebloods," more pictures of snobbish wizards and witches. "Then there's the halfbloods…"
"Which is where I come in isn't it?" Harry added sarcastically.
"But of course not," Umbridge gave a girlish giggle. "You come later. Now next on the list is the Mudbloods." Harry narrowed his eyes at seeing a picture of Hermione in the slide, "and the Blood Traitors," a picture of the Weasleys (minus Percy) was on this slide, "the Muggles," some confused looking street punks, "the criminals," a picture of Azkaban. "Naturally, I would have put you two," she pointed at Harry and Dumbledore, "in the lunatics category, your pictures are there, see? But you two have a special place further down. Guess who's next!"
"Um… the halfbreeds," Remus tried not to look sullen.
"But, of course not," Umbridge giggled again. "Next there's that nasty little speck of dirt that's been embedded in my big toenail since 1987." Harry cringed at the picture of it, "Then…"
"There's the halfbreeds." Remus said his left eye twitching.
Umbridge glared at him, "As soon as my break comes, I'm putting a restraining order on you. You're lucky the laws don't just let me have you executed! Next up is that annoying wart that I have on my… well; maybe we'll just skip that slide."
"Too late," Harry told her, this time he really did feel like puking. "I'm already scarred for life."
Ignoring him, Umbridge continued, "Then there's the halfbreeds!"
The slide was merely cutouts from Muggle horror movies.
"Which is where I am, right?" Lupin asked, more for the sake of making Umbridge mad then anything.
"Nope!" Umbridge said gleefully, "You, along with Potter and Dumbly here, are in a very special section!"
"So I suppose we are in the next section." Dumbledore had a definite twinkle in his eyes; apparently he was having as hard a time not laughing as Harry was.
Umbridge tsked, "No… see, first there's werewolf poop, then there's you!"
The picture was indeed of Harry, Lupin, and Dumbledore. This time Harry couldn't help it, he burst out laughing. And was still laughing after two minutes of Umbridge asking him what was so funny before finally entering Fudge's office with Dumbledore.
"So, Fudgie, Umbi… bridge," he said leaning onto the Minister's desk, and wiping a tear from his eyes, "How are you today?"
"What do you want," the Minister demanded as Umbridge walked over to stand behind him, her nose in an extremely haughty position.
"Do I really need a reason to stop by and say hello to my two least favorite political figures?" Harry asked, wondering why Dumbledore wasn't trying to control his actions, or the meeting. His two 'least favorite political figures' glared at him, "OK, OK, you caught me. The Headmaster and I want access to the Department of Mysteries and a fair trial for Sirius Black."
"No."
"I thought you'd say that. But see, that answer doesn't sit well with me." Both Fudge and Umbridge shared uneasy looks. "So here's how it's going to be: You don't give us what we want, I explain to the world why the words 'I will not tell lies' is engraved on my right hand."
Fudge and Umbridge gave each other very significant looks before the Minister turned back to Harry, "No, no one will believe you if you do."
"Says who?" Harry asked. "All I have to do is arrange some press conferences, invite some people into a memory of mine using a pensive, remind the world that you've been treating me like a madcap for telling the truth…"
"I get the picture, kid," Fudge responded, putting an emphasis on the last word, "But why do you want this? The Department of Mysteries is top secret, and Black is guilty as far as I'm concerned. Even if he is innocent," he snorted at this, "It will only hurt things if we…"
"So basically you're saying that you don't care whether or not you send an innocent man to living hell as long as the Ministry's reputation is in order, as long as your reputation is in order."
"So what if I do? Black is a lunatic, innocent or not."
Harry had to fight to control his anger, but it felt like it was flowing through his veins, scorching them and forcing his blood to boil over. He had an overwhelming urge to scream, and he was sure his head would explode if he held it in much longer. But he surprised himself, and didn't.
"Mr. Fudge," his voice was a forced calm, and he stunned himself with sounding… dangerous. "I'm recording this conversation," that was a lie, but whatever, "The room is bugged. How do you think the wizarding world would react to what you just said? You've been in power for six years, and according to custom, you have four more to go. You wouldn't want that time to be cut short now, would you?"
Dumbledore looked perplexed at Harry's change in tactics. And the two politicians, well, this was definitely something they had not expected. Not only had Harry not freaked out (so they couldn't put him off as a madman), but he'd actually managed to seem in control of everything. Little did they know, Harry was fighting for that control with all the inner strength he could muster.
Seeing as neither Fudge nor Umbridge was answering him, Harry decided to continue, freaking them out seemed to quench his anger a bit. "I know a lot about you, and not even threats of Azkaban will stop me from revealing everything I know to the world. Besides, if you did incarcerate me, how do you think people will react to that? I have friends in high places you two, very high places. Do you want to know why I need Sirius Black to get a fair trial? Because he's my godfather, and until recently, I thought he'd been murdered by Death Eaters. I've been very angry as I'm sure you noticed, and if you don't get me what I want, he may really die this time, a death that could've been stopped. How exactly do you think I will respond to that?"
For what seemed like hours but was really about thirty seconds, nothing in the room moved except for the glimmer in Dumbledore's eyes sparkling as he studied Harry. Then Fudge made the first move.
"No. No. NO!"
"Well…" Harry searched his mind for something useful, but ended up saying something completely stupid; or so he thought… "What if I tell people about that Playwizard magazine on your desk?"
The reaction was definitely not what was expected. Both Ministry officials immediately paled and Fudge swept the issue under his desk.
"Ooh… is that the new one? Don't forget to check out page 21!"
Everyone snapped their heads around to see Alastor Moody with a very large bundle of papers.
"Sorry, did I interrupt something?" Moody asked in a gruff voice that didn't sound sorry at all, "I just came up here to provide the Ministry with information on the Death Eaters. There have been no attacks so far since that one on the Ministry earlier this month. That must mean they're planning something big. CONSTANT VIGA…"
"WILL YOU SHUT UP MAD-EYE AND GET ME A WIZARDING CONTRACT!"
Moody stared at Fudge, "A wizarding contract? But those haven't been used in… Did I here you right?"
"YES!"
Moody threw the papers on Fudge's desk and scurried out of the room, looking over his shoulder as if he expected ninja's to start attacking or something. Harry just stared at Fudge. There was obviously more to that magazine than met the eye. Other than it's… well… usual stuff. Moody reentered the room as shifty-eyed as ever. The Minister didn't bother with anything, just grabbed the charmed document from his hand and started writing furiously on it.
Harry watched in curiosity. He'd heard about these magical contracts. They were charmed to make sure they were never broken. When Fudge was through, Dumbledore messed with it a bit. Fudge glared at the piece of parchment, but reluctantly nodded his approval. It looked something like this:
Magical Contract Between:
Harry James Potter and Albus Percival Wulfric Brain Dumbledore
And
Cornelius Fudge and Dolores Jane Umbridge
Created on the 20th of June, 1997
The above parties agree to the following:
A trial will be provided for the one, Sirius Orion Black by the one, Cornelius Fudge as soon as possible.
Harry James Potter, Albus Percival Wulfric Brain Dumbledore, and company shall henceforth be admitted entrance to the Department of Mysteries as of the 21st of June, 1997.
Harry James Potter and Albus Percival Wulfric Brain Dumbledore shall not repeat to anyone the fact that the one, Dolores Jane Umbridge used a Blood Quill in any way, shape, or form.
All parties will refrain from talking about the Playwizard magazine was spotted on the desk of the Minister of Magic on the 20th of June, 1997
Signature
Signature
Signature
Signature
Harry picked up a quill and signed. Dumbledore followed, as did the rest. Moody had gone, ushered away by Fudge's angry glares, and all four of them just looked at their signatures. They had done it. Now, if one of those promises were broken, the contract would destroy itself, and unless the opposite party said otherwise, the breaker of the contract would die.
Dumbledore broke the silence with a polite, "Good day Minister," before striding towards the door.
Trying their best not to look as elated as they were, Harry and Dumbledore headed out of the office.
"You handled that much better then I expected Harry." Dumbledore told him as they walked towards Percy and Lupin who were currently whispering to each other at the water fountain.
On hearing footsteps, however, both of them jumped and fell into what was obviously an act.
"Um... well, halfbreed," Percy started to say, "I don't agree with you! But you do have a point. Fudge is an excellent Minister... Oh, it's just you guys."
Harry ginned, "You really need to work on your acting skills, Percy."
"I'm a bureaucrat, not an actor."
Remus greeted them warmly, "It was my idea. I, unlike Mr. Weasley here, have needed to put on a lot of acts throughout my life. And I can see through yours, 'Mission Blackmail' went well then?"
"Indeed," Dumbledore smiled, "Harry was excellent. In fact, whether he realizes it or not, he learned something that will become very useful in his later life."
"And what," asked Harry, "Is that?"
"You learned that by keeping your cool, you sound more threatening then you do yelling. Just keep that in mind for the next time you're trying to get your way. It will work with most everyone but me."
A twinkle lit Dumbledore's eyes; it was a merry kind of twinkle. It was as if he were trying to convince you that everything would turn out okay with that twinkle. Harry, however, found it infuriating at the moment.
"I don't like keeping my cool. It's too difficult."
"Practice makes perfect, child."
Calming down the flames that were about to spurt up because the Headmaster had once again referred to him as a child, Harry took a deep breath, but the extra oxygen only seemed to feed the fire. So he opted to hold his breath instead, which didn't seem to work either. It was definitely a good thing for Harry's nerves when Dumbledore left to go contact his brother Aberforth. Percy had to go as well, which left Harry and Lupin with the job of informing some of the other Order members that the mission was a success.
It was a lot easier, Harry thought, doing this than convincing Fudge to do something that had nothing in it for him. Still, it was no walk in the park either. The fact that they had to keep from looking suspicious was easier said than done. Especially since when they told Tonks, she jumped with glee and ended up knocking down the wall of a cubical. But at long last their task was coming to a close. Harry looked at the list of Order members they were to contact. There was only one person left to contact.
"Well then," Remus smiled over at him, "I do believe that's it."
Harry glanced down at the list again, "Nope, we still have to inform Elaina."
"Err… Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm sure, we haven't seen her yet." He looked at Lupin, "What? I thought you liked her."
"It's not that…"
Lupin trailed off. He seemed embarrassed about something.
"This has something to do with Mr. Isaac Fuzzy-Winkles, doesn't it?"
Remus opened his mouth to deny it, but apparently changed his mind midway. "I… I just sounded like a complete moron, okay."
Then something clicked in Harry's mind. And that look Mrs. Weasley had given Lupin that morning actually made sense. Why hadn't he seen it before?
"You like her, don't you?"
"What?"
"Elaina. You like her."
"Well, yes. She's a very nice person to know. I think everyone at the Order liked her."
"No, I mean, you like her-like her."
"Harry! What are you talking about? We've only known each other for twelve hours! You are being ridiculous."
"Look, I know very well a person needs very little time to develop a crush on someone. It took me, like, two seconds of really looking at her to develop a crush on Cho Chang. It didn't really work out, but still…
"Harry, please. It's not only that. It's also the simple fact that these things just don't happen."
"What things?"
Remus threw up his hands in exasperation, "Old, mangy werewolves do not get involved with intelligent, elegant, kind, beautiful, high-ranking Ministry Officials!"
"Okay, now I know you like her."
"What?"
"Nothing… nothing… Let's go."
When they reached Elaina's office, Remus was looking decidedly uncomfortable. Harry's knock was met with a very annoyed sounding 'What now? Just come in already!' from the other side of the door. Opening it, they came upon a sight highly resembling wreckage from a hurricane. Papers were everywhere.
Elaina looked up from signing a very important-looking document and broke into a wide grin, "Remus! Harry! Oh, please come right in! Take a seat, why don't you?"
She waved her wand at the stuff on two of the chairs in the room and they were magically cleared. Harry and Remus took a seat.
"So, how'd it go?" Elaina asked excitedly, putting a silencing charm on the room and conjuring bags of mints which she tossed at Lupin and Harry.
"It was awesome," Harry said. "I'm not really supposed to say stuff about what went on in there, but I can say that tomorrow, we'll all be at the Department of Mysteries!"
Elaina's grin spread and she leapt out of her chair and danced around a bit. Harry grinned too.
"What are you doing?" Harry asked, the corners of his mouth twitching upward.
"A victory dance!" she said enthusiastically. "How can I not? Umbitch has been foiled yet again and I'm not in the view of the public eye!"
"And a fine dance it is!" Remus laughed before bowing and jokingly saying, "The fine lady dances with the grace of…"
"An elephant," Elaina finished for him, "I've been blessed with many things throughout my life. Gracefulness is not one of those things."
"You," Lupin said, "are most likely a fine dancer, and have just not taken the time to see."
Elaina laughed at this, "Yeah, sure I am! And I bet Voldemort is secretly in love with Potter here."
Remus shook his head, and then to the surprise of both Elaina and Harry, walked over to her, bowed, and took both of her hands.
"Nonsense. You have plenty of natural grace. I can tell by the way you walk. Just put one hand here… and the other here…"
In less then three minutes, the two of them looked as if they were a pair of royals dancing in a ballroom.
"You have got to teach me some of that," Harry remarked remembering the disastrous Yule Ball. "Maybe then I won't scare away so many girls with my two left feet that way."
Elaina smiled at him as Remus let go of her. "I think I just found Mr. Perfect-Male. Tell me Lupin, can you cook and ask for directions as well?" She laughed again. "Speaking of food, how about you guys join me for lunch? I'm done here anyway. It'll be my treat!"
Harry was just about to turn down the offer. He had, after all, been mooching on a ton of people all his life, especially Mrs. Weasley. He had no idea why so many were nice to him; all he ever did was get in the way.
But just as he was opening his mouth to refuse, Remus beat him to it, replying rapidly and not stopping once for a breath.
"No, no. I just couldn't. Harry can go if he wishes though. I guess I'll go with him if he does, but only as his guard. I don't have much money and couldn't pay you back or anything and you've already helped out at my trial and been really nice to me even though I've been acting like a freak and I think Moody could go he has his lunch break in…"
"Remus!" Elaina interrupted, "There is nothing wrong about the way you act, I have plenty of money. It was Harry that did everything at the trial, and you are so much nicer to have a conversation with than Mad-Eye Moody!" She took a deep breath then turned to Harry, "Besides, Harry wants to go and needs you to protect him… right Harry?"
Harry nearly burst into laughter at the pleading look on Elaina's face. He knew Remus liked her, perhaps the feeling was mutual. On the other hand, she could just really not want to be around Moody. He'd kind-of freaked her out with tales of rabid squirrels the night before. And Remus thought he was weird! Anyhow, Harry decided to play along.
"Yes I do need you Remus," he then fake tripped and made quite a show of moaning on the floor, "Ow! My leg was just mauled by the linoleum flooring! And my shoelace was in on it too! See what grave danger I'm in when you're not around Professor Lupin?"
"Harry," Remus said shaking his head, "You, are pathetic. Get off the floor. I'll go."
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