Things Go Bump in the Night
The two jounin leapt from building to building. They were invisible. No one could know where they were. They were-
"YO!" the two sand nin jumped suddenly. Naruto stood there smiling and waved at them. "HOW THE HELL DID YOU FIND US?" they roared.
"Um…cause I've been following you guys the entire time?" he scratched his head. "But that's not the point. What are YOU guys doing, following Gaara and Sakura, with a-" he leaned over and caught a glimpse of what was strapped on Temari's back. "A SNIPER RIFLE?" he yelled.
"You know what this is?" Temari looked at him in shock. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH A SNIPER RIFLE!" Naruto yelled again. "That's not the point-" "IT IS THE POINT!" Naruto yelled again. (notice how there's a lot of yelling and interrupting) Kankuro shook his head. "Naruto, be quiet, all right? We don't even know how to use it…" Naruto laughed. "You guys don't know how to use a sniper rifle? You guys are dumber than me! It's so easy! You just… you just…what?" Because Temari and Kankuro were looking at him in a weird and new way. "How…just how do you know how to do it?" Naruto froze. "I don't know how to use a rifle." "You almost told us how to use it." "I don't know what you're talking about." "NARUTO!" "FINE! You just (No, I am not teaching you guys how to use a sniper rifle.)
"Thanks Naruto." Temari loaded it up. "Oy, you still haven't told me what you're going to do with that." Temari and Kankuro glanced at each other. They owed him, but…what was he going to do? "We're going to shoot Sakura…" Kankuro began. Naruto shrugged "Oh well. Sucks to be Sasuke." Temari started. "Wait! Sasuke likes Sakura." Naruto froze. "I said nothing. Bye!" and he fled for his life. Temari and Kankuro glanced at each other. "Ohhh shit…" they said. "Oh well." And began to finish their job.
At the Ramen stand of Sunagakure (yes, there is one. You just don't see it)…
The two dating ninja were slurping ramen without a word. If it continued that way, the two wouldn't have fallen in love and life would go on with everyone on board, but it just so happened that…
"GAARA!" Kankuro leapt at his brother and attempted to pour the potion down his throat, but he forgot about the sand shield (how can he be so stupid), and ended up spilling all the precious liquid as he slammed onto the ground, knocked out from the sand. Temari on the other hand, had perfectly memorized Naruto's instructions and was now aiming at Sakura's head.
"Die whore!" and fired. Appearance is never what it seems. So when Gaara had gotten up to prod his brother's body, he got in the line of fire. So the bullet had been blocked by the sand shield, and Sakura, knowing she had almost died and believed Gaara was an awesome ninja who protected her so naturally and had done all that on purpose, fell in love with him and hugged him, and Gaara who had never been hugged felt such warmth that he fell in love, and the two just stood there. (Just ignore the sand shield. Shukakh has a sense of humor.) And the entire situation blew up into a shit size problem. Of course this all made it into the papers.
In Otogakure…
Sasuke was reading the paper, when he noticed front headlines, "Foreign Love" with a picture of Gaara and Sakura hugging in a ramen bar. "Accidentally", he activated Chidori and punched a hole in the paper. "Accidentally".
"Kabuto!" he yelled. The sound medic appeared behind him, reading Baki's memoir/self-help book. "Yes?"
"We're going to Sunagakure," Sasuke's eyes glowed. "And stop reading that retarded book! You're worse than Kakashi…" "Hmm…" Kabuto flipped a page. "Sounds like you have anger issues…the best way to cure that is-" "Kabuto!" Sasuke yelled. "Allright allright, I'm coming. But you really should get some therapy…" Sasuke glared at him. "If you weren't Orochimaru's favorite…" "Ha, according to Baki over here, comparing positions is a sign of jealousy…"
And that went on for a long time.