"Because I asked her to." Draco Malfoy replied, honestly surprised at how honest he was being. "I went to Hogwarts not knowing who I was engaged to. That's like putting a pregnant cow in front of vampire bats."

"Someone would be after... your blood?" Hermione asked, blaunching a little at the description.

"Close. Everyone I meet, it sometimes seems, sees me for my money." Draco Malfoy paused, "If that wasn't the case, my father would be a man of ill repute, given what skullduggery he was up to in the war, Imperius or no."

"And...?"

"Girls would be fighting over me. Even engaged girls. Eligible bachelor, Gold beyond your Dreams, Not Entirely Stupid, and Not Entirely Ugly." Draco Malfoy said, his eyes hollow, "I pleaded with Pansy to be my fake betrothed."

"Does... does she have someone?" Hermione asked.

"Yeah, down in France. He knows all about the scheme too - wouldn't have started it without that, really. That would be entirely too hot of a conflagration."

"So... you... haven't actually, done joint congress with her?" Hermione's face was getting beet red.

"Picturing it, are you?" Draco Malfoy purred, "No, not in the slightest. One kiss, per protocol, at the Yule ball."

"Then... then why were you... on the train?!" Hermione said, looking incredulous.

"Pansy had been on me - literally, sitting on me - the entire summer because I wouldn't. Couldn't. talk about that night." Draco Malfoy said, a knife sharp grin slicing over his face, "The Express was the first chance for privacy we got. She wanted the entire story, and wasn't going to wait."

"So, why did you lie to me?" Hermione asked, and Draco was struck by how little she seemed upset.

Draco attempted to look penitent, but he rather thought he looked like an only slightly guilty child. "Perfect opportunity to pull the Gryffindor prude's leg, innit?"

"I did believe you." Hermione said.

Hermione took a breath and continued, "So, you haven't... not with anyone else?"

"No, not even kissing. Pansy saved me from being tackled by as many girls as had high enough opinions of their "charms" to think that inflicting them unasked would cause me to fall in love with them."

Hermione giggled at the picture. "Draco Malfoy, getting groped and manhandled, by his entire Slytherin class!"

"Worse," Draco said, managing to sound doleful, "All of Ravenclaw and most of Hufflepuff too!"

[a/n: Yes, Pansy has been being helpful. Even while not speaking to Draco for months on end.

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