Snape was having a normal, which is to say awful, day. There were always too many students who didn't even bother to do the rudiments of studying, and too few that actually showed some element of brilliance. Snape wasn't a monster, he gave credit where it was due - Goyle and Crabbe were far from stellar students, but they managed to put together English sentences and attempt to understand what the theory was. He could say less for the Gryffindors, some of whom spent their entire life cavilling about his assignments - the entire time they were goofing and gadding about, rather than sticking themselves to the sticking place and getting them done.

No, parents might wonder why Snape had little patience for most of their beloved children, but his fellow teachers never did.

And his neck was killing him...

Suddenly, there came a hasty knock on the door, that told volumes of who was behind it. It had sounded almost panicked, which meant either a Slytherin who needed Urgent Counseling (hopefully nothing toxic involved. It always ruined Snape's day when a student was permanently injured), or a Ravenclaw with a Homework Question.

"Enter," Snape drawled, not bothering to get up. It was Draco Malfoy, surprisingly enough, and Snape had barely enough time to notice that Malfoy wasn't actually slowing down, before Malfoy punched him straight in the nose.

*Crunkh*

Malfoy sent him a glare, as Snape tried to prevent blood from completely ruining the assignments (he knew the students would blame him for their poor grades, nevermind that he'd just run a running average over their last few, not give them a zero).

The door's slam echoed through his room, as Snape finished conjuring up a cloth to blot up the blood. All the assignments would have to be burned - blood was not something you let children get ahold of, not if you knew what was good for you.

The fireplace flared to life, and Snape heard Dumbledore saying, "Severus, would you mind coming to my office?" Yes, Yes Snape would mind, not the least of which because his nose was swelling to truly astronomical proportions. Black would have had a field day, Snape thought with characteristic black humor. Pity he's dead, isn't it?

While Snape would dearly love to give Albus a piece of his mind, he had to remember to behave. Snape hated behaving, but such was his life, under two masters.

Into the floo Snape stepped, and, as he stepped through, sent a furious glare at Dumbledore.

Dumbledore, of course, had neglected to mention that Harry Potter was sitting in his office. It was bad enough, Snape being injured in front of the Headmaster - who'd been through enough student spats to realize this occurred reasonably often.

Potter's green eyes, though, were big as saucers, and his mouth had dropped open.

Albus elected to sound kind (Snape hated kind, and would have rather'd Lucius' "What the bloody happened to you? Literally, I suppose"), "Severus, whatever is the matter?"

Snape, his entire vocal pattern mangled by the lack of clear nasal airways, said, "One of my Slytherins decided to inform me that he objected to me sticking my big nose into his business."

Snape hadn't thought it possible, but Harry's eyes bulged out of his face. If the cause wasn't Snape's pride and dignity being irretrievably sullied, Snape would have found it amusing.

As it was, Snape sent Potter a glare, as he stomped into his usual corner (nobody seemed to realize that Snape just didn't want anyone at his back), and Snape was gratified to see Potter at least attempt to sober up.

[a/n: Ah, abject humiliation. Sorry, Snape fans, but he kinda does deserve to get kicked around.

I liked the one suggestion I got for Hermione's revenge, but really, Snape's been pranked enough. And removing his aura of fear and wrath is going to get her killed, or as good as. So, I'll be looking for something a little more subtle... and nerve wracking.

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