The Diego Diaries: Game, Boy (dd8 83)
=0=Iacon, Cybertron
The stadium was capacity before long and the home fans were rocking the house. Even among the Cybertronian fans were those for Crater's Comets. Though they were a minority, they were loudly heard. About half a joor after they found their seats in the Primal Box, the show was ready to go.
Referees ran onto the field followed by Password who was ultimate head of the adult game on both worlds along with the linemen who would rule when a ball went out of bounds. They halted in the center of the vast arena.
"WELCOME TO IACON STADIUM IN IACON CITY, CYBERTRON!" Password bellowed to the crowd.
ROAR!
"TODAY, WE'RE SEEKING BOTH ADVANCEMENT AND ELIMINATION IN THESE PLAYOFF GAMES BETWEEN THE BRIGADIERS OF NOVA CRONUM-!"
ROAR!
"-AND THE CRATER COMETS OF AUTOBOT CITY, MARS!"
ROAR!
"THE FIRST TEAM OUT IS NOVA CRONUM!"
The arena exploded with sound and fury as the team marched out of the tunnel. They were proud, huge and ready to rumble. They took their place along their side and waited after planting their flag in the ground.
"NEXT! PLEASE WELCOME FROM MARS! THE CRATER COMETS!"
Prime led them out, the entire team, and as he showed himself the arena rose almost as one to roar to the heavens. They walked to their side of the playing field, planted their flag, then lined up to wait.
"Ladies and gentlemen, please rise for the playing of the anthems," Password said as everyone did and turned toward the huge flags of Cybertron, Mars and the dual flag of Cybertron, Mars and Earth. As they did, Prime stepped onto the field to stand in full view as a spotlight highlighted him.
The anthem of Cybertron and the anthem of The Primes played as he stood there listening to his people sing the words. It was beautiful and so was he. When it was over he stepped back to his line as the stadium roared with approval.
"Ladies and gentlemen, Nova Cronum Brigadiers." Password turned toward the team and watched as they began their pregame haka, swearing eternal broken struts and damnation upon the upstart Comets. They whirled and when they finished they walked back in contempt of Crater.
The place went nuts.
"Ladies and gentlemen, the Crater Comets," Password said.
Prime led them through their team haka closing the ground between sides as they shouted and demonstrated their own eternal damnation toward Nova Cronum. When they were finished they walked away backs turned to show their own contempt toward the Brigadiers.
The place went nuts.
Prime and Hardie walked to the center of the field along with the captain and co-captain of the Brigadiers to toss the coin and see who would begin. As he did, four little kids leading a dog and three cows onto the field walked to the Comet bench bringing roars from the crowd as they took their places with the team.
Prime, Hardie and the other two walked back to the bench as the officials ran toward their own positions. Password announced the decision. "Nova Cronum won the toss. They'll take the ball."
ROAR!
Password ran off the field as the offense of Nova Cronum and the defense of Crater came on. They lined up, the referee tossed the ball toward Nova Cronum, then ran for his life. It was on.
Maelstrom who was center jumped for the ball, missed it, then landed on the behemoth mountain that was the offensive center of the Cronum team. Grappling for the ball, they gripped each other and the first scrum was formed. Falling into a hard shelled 'turtle', the mass began to press toward the goal of Crater with all its might. It was also pressed back by Crater and its kick ass defense or, as some wag so fondly put it, Cell Block D.
Heavy emphasis on block.
With Maelstrom, Nitro, Scar and Payload part of the lineup of Crater, the Brigadiers were slowing in their advance. Beneath the shiny exterior which was a glittering mass of many colors, the mayhem below scrutiny was savage. Biting, punching, stamping and other forms of good sportsmanship prevailed. Cursing, swearing and bellowing could be heard on the sound system as the tide slowly began to turn.
Back they began to move heading toward Cronum's goal, the groaning raving mass of multi purpose vehicles shifting under the pressure. Then the slagging ball popped out and landed outside of the line. After a moment of whistles, shouting and a referee standing on the turtle screaming down at them that the ins had to be made, they all stood up. The ref fell off onto his helm, rose with wrath and began to swear at the players to do this and that. A well placed rap on his helm by a Cronum player took care of that impertinence.
The whistles blew.
"Well, this looks like a brawl."
Ratchet nodded. "It does. But then they all do. Any strategy suggestions?"
Prowl smirked at Ratchet. "Guns maybe?"
The referee threw a penalty. "TEN YARD PENALTY TO CRONUM FOR ROUGHING THE LINE REFEREE!"
BOO! times about sixty-five thousand for the fifty-five thousand or so Cronum fans present.
HA-HA-HA! -the fifty-five thousand or so fans of other Cybertronian teams present, especially those who didn't make the playoffs.
BWAHAHAHAHA! MORE, YOU WANKER! -the one hundred and ten fans of Crater's Comets present.
The referee huffed to the line, tossed the ball to the line ref, then ran back out of the way of the bitching players who began to make the towers to block or protect the ball from coming/going out of play.
Players zigged and zagged between the towers that were made as the ball player checked to see who was open. No one was so he crashed forward into Maelstrom and Scar. They grabbed at him as he burst between, then aimed for the Crater goal where Blackjack and Raptor were defensive backs and Ironhide was the goalie.
"LOOK ALIVE, INFANT! HERE HE COMES!" Raptor bellowed with a guffaw.
Everyone began to chase the slagger as he homed into the goal but he was thrown into a cocked hat as Chromia aimed for his legs, threw herself at them and both cartwheeled out of bounds.
ROAR!
=0=Up there
"Chromia is a stand up femme."
"She is."
"She's got no fear."
"No."
"Lucky Maelstrom."
Prowl grinned. "Well, I wouldn't go quite that far."
Both Prowl and Ratchet laughed long and loud in the stands and on the jumbotron.
=0=On the field
Chromia and the big mech glowered at themselves as they stood in a circle on the field where they crashed together for the jump ball.
Yes, jump ball.
In football.
New rule: if the ball is crashed before it goes out of line, then there will be a jump ball between the crasher(s) and the crashee(s) rather than an ins but only if the two at hand got into fisticuffs to get the ball, hence Chromia kneecapping the slagger. That one. If that meant two jumping for the ball, then good. If that meant a melee of several doing it, then boffo television ratings here we come!
Did you know that basketball had taken off like a (Crater) comet on Cybertron?
=0=Up in the booth
"I think I love this new rule addition." -Jazz
"I like how basketball and footie have cross pollinated each other like this." -Professor Blaster
"Yeah. More violence. My money is on Chromia. Bet?" -Jazz
"Nope." The 'Perfessor'
=0=On the field
It would long be discussed in the bars and man caves of various places how Chromia of Caminus climbed up the chassis of Big Guy of Nova Cronum like he was a flight of stairs to grab the ball, then back flip off. Then they would discuss in hushed tones amid a slew of medium strength beers how she managed to outrun the linemen of two teams chasing her, blitzkrieg two defensive backs and kick the goalie into the outback of the beyond before stuffing the ball through the hoop which she swung on before landing gracefully on her peds.
All in an orn's work.
Even though it would take a moment for Maelstrom to catch up to her, he would, then carry her back to the bench on his shoulders.
All Hail Chromia!
She was enveloped by the team after Maelstrom gently put her on the ground. Then he walked out onto the field and bellowed, beating on his chassis like a madman before walking back to the bench like the King of Romania. He slapped servos with Prime when he did.
Prime led his line out onto he field where they made their way, taking positions for the return.
=0=Upstairs
"I think Maelstrom loves him some Chromia, Jazz."
"I think he does. For those who don't know, Maelstrom of Slaughter City is the younger brother of the infamous Turmoil who was a major player in the Decepticons and a pirate of some repute. Maelstrom met Chromia in a bar where she beat him at arm wrestling and kicked the slag out of him when he protested. From that moment onward, it was true love." Jazz laughed. "They came together again during a migration when Maelstrom was being an aft with his group and challenged her to a knife fight. If she won, he'd surrender his group. If not, … I don't know what that would lead to. Besides, smart money was on Chromia. She went out to slag him to the Pit. She slashed him so badly in the ensuing knife fight that he surrendered. They're one of the best bonds I know of."
"Yeah," Blaster said with a shake of his helm. "Kids these orns …"
=0=Mars
"Damn. That's a great love story. Remind me to never piss Chromia off," Ron Witwicky said with a chuckle.
"Why, that's almost … ALMOST as romantic as ours," Judy Witwicky said to great applause.
=0=E2
"I will never understand these bastards," Kyle Davis said as he sat in the lounge with the others watching the game.
"You don't have to, Kyle," Owen said with a grin. "I'll do I for you."
=0=Prima Station
At one of the many public lounges around the station humans were gathered to watch the game. They were at their homes, the bars, restaurants and in the auditorium. It was consensus opinion there that Chromia was The Femme.
=0=Back at the game
Prime received the ball, leaned his shoulder into it, then rammed the center upward, over his body and back into the churning line action that he'd just blasted through. He ran onward as mechs in the Cronum backfield began to grab him. He was buried alive. By the time they crawled off after delivering punches discreetly, Primeship be damned, this was football, he was banged up pretty good.
Imagine fifteen mid-sized cars being dropped on top of you from a crane. Imagine all of them climbing off slowly but not before they dented a few fenders along the way. It helped that Magnus and Raptor were 'helping' them climb off Prime.
The image of big mechs flying over the shoulders of bigger mechs like cord wood into the shed would live long and large for humans everywhere.
"You okay, Optimus? You look kind of manhandled," Raptor asked as they walked back to their side to do the ins.
"I am fine. Paybacks?" Optimus asked as his blood lust aka team spirit began to rise.
"I AM RAPTOR! Do you need to ask?" Raptor asked as he took his place.
Prime laughed aloud, took his place over the line, then passed the ball to Jetta before anyone could really set up. Jetta took off like a bottle rocket for the Cronum goalie.
=0=Up there
"Jetta is good looking, good sparked and one fast slagger."
"I know. I suggested to Optimus to use him on a rotational basis every 1.2 breems to shake up the timing. He had a tendency to pass to Arcee or Elita 15.545% of the time, thus establishing a pattern that could play to his ultimate disadvantage," Prowl actually said as he consulted his datapad.
Ratchet would ask Prime about this later. He would find out from Prime that Prowl was the 'cutest mech he ever know' but he also knew 'fuck all' about football. "But do not tell him, Ratchet. He is so cute helping me with his advice, it makes half the pleasure of playing for me."
Ratchet wouldn't. He agreed Prowl was adorable when he 'helped'.
=0=TBC 02-03-2021 02-21-2021