The Diego Diaries: Camping (dd8 124) Friday 3-26-2021
=0=At an administrative meeting in the city
They sat around the table, the mechs and femmes that ran the colony. The mechs assigned to watch the newcomers if they ever left the camp area they were told to occupy were telling the tale.
"Then the slagger, Ratchet, he said that the Prime was Ultra Magnus, Ultramus Prime. Sentinel got himself killed in an argument over a femme with Megatron."
It was silent as they mulled it over, then the leader, Reset sat back in his chair. "I had no idea that Sentinel was a femme chaser."
"Someone named Sunstreaker," the mech said as the others nodded.
They considered that, then Reset sat forward to lean on his elbows. "I don't know her."
"Ultra Magnus killed Megatron," another began before the group's astonishment took over a moment. "Apparently he did it with his bare servos."
"I've met Magnus before. He's huge, a primal-type frame. I'd believe that. Megatron is dead. This mech is the leader of the world, a law and order type without any notable sense of humor or personality," another mech said. "I remember him with that troublemaker, Orion Pax. How did he get to be Prime?"
"It doesn't matter. He is now and if for some reason he comes here for these slaggers we'll have to deal with him," Reset said grimly. "We have to get them corralled like the others. No one is going to undo our life here unless we get what we want wherever that takes us. No one."
They then began to plan their offensive against the newcomers.
=0=At a campsite of dubious distinction
They were drinking a special formulation for beer that all survival gear carried because someone somewhere understood mechs. Raptor was mixing one at the moment, pouring 'beer' powder into a flask, then liquid energon from a bottle, a special formulation as well. He then shook it like a paint blender at Home Depot before opening the cap to take a sip. "Not bad if you don't have any other. You can still get your buzz on."
Everyone was, most of them minus the humans. Those little slaggers were lounging on their little chairs like the mechs, staring at a new sky and new stars while they chatted. As they did a bright light began to come in from space to streak overhead, hit the ground nearby with a bang, then all was silent again.
"That was kinda pretty," Hercy said as he stared upward at the now empty sky.
Ratchet staggered up. "I'll go see what it is." He stumbled out of the mob, then ambled toward the woods in just this side of a straight line.
"Better go with him," Lissie said to no one in particular. She was perched in a camp chair with her peds on Steiner's legs.
Bezel and Lon stood. "We'll go." They headed out after Ratchet who from the sound of things was running into trees as he walked deeper into the forest.
"Those are mighty fine infants," Jack said as the elders nodded. "Ratchet might never come back but for them."
"Might have to make a project of them," Sun said as the elders nodded.
"Maybe they can be an object lesson to your project, Raptor," Jack said as all the elders nodded.
"Sort of a 'this is how you do it' thing for them to muse over?" Sun asked as the elders nodded.
"Exactly," Jack said as the elders nodded.
Hot Rod and Smokey listened to the conversation with frowns, something that was amusing to all the elders. "Uh, Appas and Amma," Smokey said. "We're right here."
"Exactly where we want you, infants," Hercy said as all the elders nodded.
It was going to be one of those nights.
=0=Into the Woods
They followed into the darkness with night vision turned up making their way around the thumps, stumbles, hysterical giggling and odd pratfall that signaled Ratchet's position. He was ambling through the trees bouncing off them as he squeezed himself through their ancient density.
They caught up with him, waited until he gave himself The Cure, then continued onward toward a small meadow where a long trench could be seen. Stepping over fallen logs and a large boulder, they reached it, then Ratchet knelt. He scanned it, studying it for a moment, then rose again. "Well, Dad's looking for us. This is from Optimus."
"Do you think it told them anything?" Lon asked.
"I do," Ratchet said. "Tomorrow, we're going to salvage this. It wasn't struck by anything. It just landed in a thump. We could use it for our own purposes. I just have to think up a purpose." He smiled brilliantly at the two mechs who grinned at him with real warmth. The walk back was informative as Ratchet explained the availability and quality of his 'many daughters'.
It would be hilarious.
=0=At the Ops Center
They looked at the data before the probe disappeared off their maps. It was enough to give them a starting point. But what sort of point could it be? Everyone including Joe Bowers and John Fulton were in the planning center below decks working on some kind of solution that wouldn't disappear anymore of Prime's mechs.
=0=At the campfire
The probe was a welcome bit of news. Ratchet relayed it skillfully and delegated Raptor to bring it back with whoever he needed the next morning to be used for something when he was sober enough to think about it.
Raptor then rose, wobbled over to the forest to disappear, then some time later staggered back out with a fully dead probe slung over his shoulder. Teetering here and there under its colossal weight, he reached open space near the doors of the building where they were camping, then pitched it to the ground.
Everyone flinched because they were drunk and forgot it wasn't armed, then settled down again when it didn't blow up in their faces.
Ratchet gave Raptor a dazzler as he sat down and began to drink his beer again. "Future bond's list, slagger."
"Sounds good to me," Raptor said with a snicker.
Ratchet stared at the sky, then considered something. He rose, then glanced around. "I have an idea. I'll be right back," he said, then he began to walk down the dirt road to the airfield beyond.
"Do you think that's wise?" Bezel asked Lissie with a worry. "Him going there alone like that?"
Lissie considered that, then nodded. "You're right. The slaggers would rue the orn. Why don't you two fine younglings go with and provide support. He might need someone to hold his cup."
Bezel stared at Lissie, an incredibly beautiful elder with the most incredible scroll work on her armor, all of it a reviving lost art since her arrival in the colony. Once the younger femmes saw it, that was all she wrote. Literally. He was in awe of her, this Immortal femme who trained soldiers, officers and could fight with the best of them. "I will, Amma," he said as he rose to go.
Lon rose with him and was followed by Sideswipe who grinned at Lissie as he walked past. They disappeared after Ratchet into the darkness.
"I'd go with them but I'm wasted," Warlord said.
"Me, too," Red Wing agreed. "Feels good."
"It does," Warlord said.
Saber who wasn't wasted sat and watched them.
=0=On the road
"What are you going to do, Ada?" Sideswipe said as he walked behind Ratchet with Lon and Bezel.
"I was thinking about sending a message in code through the low band that the slaggers used to send their distress call. I think I can breach the … whatever this is and aim for an expediter. If I can it'll be relayed through the other three and make it to Prowler in nearly real time. If it works we have a comm line to use again. Then we get rescued. See?" he said as he glanced at them with his most dazzling smile.
The three youngsters laughed as they reached the small airfield where the shuttles were parked. No one seemed around in the barely lit area so they walked to Kup's ship to climb aboard after resetting the alarm. Walking inside, they sat heavily, then watched as Ratchet began to work at the communications console to write a text.
It would take a moment, then Ratchet glanced at the three. "Hold your fire, boys, and pray this works." He then set the frequency, the direction and destination to expediter number four. Pushing a button, he watched as the message was sent.
He would follow it until it reached whatever barrier he was beginning to gather was above them, then it disappeared. Sitting back, he glanced at the mechs with him. "Lets hope it got through."
They would.
=0=Ops Center not too much later
Prowl walked back into the room from the upper deck Ops Center where he was called because of a message. He rapped his knuckles and got everyone's attention. "We got a message from Loon," he said with a slight smirk. The remark was heavily relieving to everyone there, just like he hoped it would.
"Play it, Prowl," Prime said as he sat back in his chair with some small sense of relief.
"Old mech will find the crack in the wall," Ironhide said with pride.
Prowl pushed a button and on the screen on the back wall a hugely large image of Ratchet appeared from a shuttle with Lon, Bezel and Sideswipe sitting behind him. He was tapping the console, then looked up. "Hi. Not much time so I'll tell you that we're all fine, stranded on the second solar system's best planet, third from the sun with an ingrown colony of high caste slaggers who've been here since before The Fall, stranded just like us. How, I don't know yet. Others are here, too, but we haven't found them. We're going to look when morning comes.
"The humans are great. Everyone is okay though the high tones here are restless. I filled them in on the changes since they left in the Great Exodus and not before the Clampdown really came on board. I told them about the new Prime, Ultramus Prime and how Sentinel got killed by Megatron fighting over that legendary femme, Sunstreaker. Warlord mentioned killing Soundwave and Red Wing, Shockwave. Or was it the other way around. Anyway, Saber watched.
"Right now, we can't get off but we're going to reconn and do science on the ground. The humans have food and water for years and all the rest of us can make it. But never fear. We're living in a toilet so there's running water. Comm me back, slaggers. I'm the chief cook, bottle washer and brains of this train wreck. Tell the kids I'll bring them a toy when I get back, preferably the helm of the leader, Reset. I'm sending this now."
With that, the message ended.
Everyone sat in silence a moment, then all of them turned toward the stunned figure of the Empire Chief Manager and City Mayor.
"Ultramus Prime, Magnus?" Arcee asked with delight. "What does that make me?"
She was sorry that she asked.
=0=At the shuttle
They rose to go, stepped out and were confronted with a good dozen mechs with guns.
"We told you to stay in your area," one of them said coldly.
"Actually, given that Dad gave me these whips, wherever they are is my area," Ratchet said. "Unless you're going to pull an Ironhide and steal them, back off and we're on our way."
"Go to your area and stay there," another mech said.
Sideswipe glanced at him, then his blades slid out of his wrist gauntlets. "And if we don't?"
"Then we shoot," the first mech said.
"That would be unwise."
Everyone glanced up to see half a dozen Seekers hovering soundlessly in the sky over them. Warlord was with them.
Ratchet smiled. "I forgot you slaggers could do that." He looked at the group. "Coming through." With that, he stepped down and continued onward followed by the three with him.
Warlord flipped into root mode in the air when they were clear, then landed with his usual dash on the ground. Standing straight again, he looked at the group with a cold optic. "These shuttles are our. We're going to come and go for what we need. They're mined so you mess with them at your peril.
"Something tells me that you couldn't last ten seconds with a Seeker barrage of twenty mechs. My squad will mow you down. We're not bothering you. Don't bother us," he said as he flipped up, transformed, burst into flames, then led the group onward toward their camp.
The mechs watched them go, then one turned to their leader. "We can't handle a Seeker barrage."
"Not yet anyway," the first said, then they walked back to the city together.
=0=At the camp
"And that's why Warlord is on the future bond's list," Ratchet said with a dazzling smile as he lounged on his chair. "I'm linked into the ship and when the reply comes I'll have it transferred to me."
"What if it doesn't come?" Smokey asked darkly. "What if we're stranded here forever?"
Everyone glanced at him. He shrank down slightly before reasserting himself a bit. "What if it happens?"
"Then we take the city and make it our own big casino," Jack said as he winked at Sun.
"Sounds good to me," Sun said as the youngsters and humans looked at both with awe. It never occurred to them not to believe every word they said.
Jackpot.
=0=TBC 03-25-2021
NOTE: Don't give up on replies to notes. I had snow removed from the roof of my house and now have a seven foot pile a icy snow around my house and blocking my windows and back door. Rather than having it melt into my house at the door I'm pounding on it and shoveling the broken bits farther out with a pick ax, a machete like snow knife and a shovel. I have to salute my ancestors for having enough genetics to keep me going at my age. :D:D:D