Chapter Borg: Ganondorf's Folly
"Falalalala…" Kelso smirked as he got righteous energy in his righteous life.
Knuckles's dead head was in the hands of the bald one's poor workers. "What should we do?" they asked one another.
"We will use the catapult!" cried the biggest guy. They used their superior lumbering skills to craft a catapult from the felled aspens. They cushioned Knuckles's noggin in the catapult and everyone gave him a thumb-up for good luck. Maybe someday Knuckles will marry and be able to tell this legendary story to his grandchildren.
"Launch the dude!" cried the leader.
The head was launched and it landed upon Knuckles's body. Like beautiful magic, Knuckles became whole again and life returned to his red echidna body.
"I live?" asked Knuckles to his hands.
The servants of Baldi cheered with grand joy.
Knuckles wept into the sleeve of his hooded sports jersey. "Thanks, guys!"
"Now go help Kelso defeat Baldi!" called the slaves.
"Yes, to be hero!" said Knuckles. He ran off to join his fellow bro.
"Took you long enough, man!" said Kelso with a stern, but witty expression. He was so badly beaten up by Baldi's basic manoeuvers.
"You come to defy me as well, echidna? And you defied death too!" said Baldi.
"I fear nothing! I'm Knuckles and your Baldi are under arrest!" Knuckles puffed up his chest and performed the ritual to unlock his ninja stomach.
"That's a forbidden technique!" cried Kelso upon close inspection. His eyes gleamed like tiger fires.
"Verily so, I learnt it from Espio the Chameleon, my totally radical brohan!" said Knuckles. "He said to only use this ninja spell if the going gets tough. Seems how I already died once today, I can't think of a better day to use it!"
"Don't get too excited, boy!" growled Baldi as he leapt into the air and tried to slice Knuckles's head off again with the meter stick.
Kelso intercepted the slice with a fiery Spin Dash. "I'm still your main opponent Baldi! You fight me too! ROAR!"
"You smell like cheese!" yelled Baldi and he shot a school apple at Kelso. The apple juice solidified and now Kelso was that 70's statue.
"He's unmoving now!" cried Vader. He took out his lightsaber. "I promised my lad Luke Skywalker that I would refrain from using my ugly powers, but Baldi is such a taker of hope. He enslaved poor lumberjacks like a horrible doer of evil! I am of the Sith, but I believe in purity as much as impurity. Baldi must be vanquished! Hi-ho!"
With that, Vader entered the fray. Pal and Jim were close behind him.
"More losers?" grunted Baldi. "No matter. Soon all five of you ugly pests will be fish-sleepers!"
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